Walkthrough


*Dark*
   You'll end up in Dark a few times. Just wait about five turns, check which sense is not 'missing', and type that sense in. Then you must type in a command which will wake you up.
   If it's hearing that returns, you must type DROP THING. If the sound is ‘ringing’, you’re going to Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency. Else, to the Planetary Design Workshop.
   For feeling, you must push it. If you can feel a 'cold lump', it's to the Fjords. Otherwise, to the Morpher ship.
   If your sight returns to you, you have to TALK TO BLUR. If you see a small black blur, you're going to Below Magrathea. Otherwise, you are returning to Milliways.
   With smell, you will end up in the Golgafrincham Ark B when you detect the "sweet, bubble bath" - and at the Big Bang Burger Bar when you can smell something "strong, like a barbecue". You need to ENTER THE DARK ROOM when you arrive here.
   NOTE: You can get to Dark in Milliways by going north from the Car Park. Head there to get to all the parts below Milliways.


*Magrathea*
   You begin on the Ramp, with Marvin. Examine Marvin to see that his eyes glow (miserably). Talking to him will reveal nothing except that he is depressed. Head up to the hatchway and get your gown. Wear then open it. This will reveal the Hitchhiker’s Guide and the thing your aunt gave you which you don’t know what it is. You can ask the Guide about things like Magrathea if you like, but I won’t be doing so here unless it’s important.
   Walk down twice to the Blighted Ground. Get the blue frob and the box. Examine the box and you will find out it is a radio. (The blue frob we will come to much later.)
   Go southeast to the lip of the whale crater. Look in it - it’s too dark to see anything, so you will need a light source to get down. Head southwest, and now down to a ledge. This may seem selfish, as stated, but get the plant.
   Examine the plant. (Plugs for roots, which remind of a radio station. Now, what can you plug this into? Ah, yes, the radio!) Plug the plant into the radio. Marvin is now following you because the music is sad and he’s depressed, so that’s good. Head down into the whale crater with Marvin as your light source, and now… South. You will now enter DARK.


*Below Magrathea*
   You find yourself in an "interview room". There's a bowl of fruit, a sporfe, and two white mice (Benjy and Percy). On the south wall is a very bad painting, an emergency exit. All this is important.
   Get the sporfe and the fruit. If you ask the Guide about white mice, you will learn that they are VERY DEADLY and likely to kill you. Ask the mice what the point of the game is to find out their relation to you, which is that they want your brain to find the Question to the Answer of Life, the Universe and Everything. (Well what did the Guide say?)
   Examine the painting and one of the mice will ask you if you like it. Say yes. The mice will start ranting about the painting. (Now you have a tight time limit!) Head to the exit (turning your back on the mice before will cause them to shoot you, but now not). Then try to open the door and notice there’s an emergency exit button beside it. Push the button, and finally head south.
   Phew! You’re out of there. But this section has random movement exits (even though there are only four rooms, it’s technically a maze!), AND a time limit. So SAVE first. To get away, run around the rooms and remember which exits you’ve already taken, until you come across the Great Device. Walk behind the device to the northwest or southwest. Now wait three times. You will now enter DARK.


*Milliways, after Magrathea*
   You start this part which gives the game its name in the Reception to Milliways. Ignore the menu (it’s useless) and go up. Wait until the first-class idiot passes by you (notice his card), then go northeast. Now you are in the Dining Hall with Ford and Zaphod and Trillian, but they’re drunk, so useless. Put everything in the Thing, and open Ford’s satchel. Get the Santriginean Mineral Water and the satchel. Put both in the Thing. Get the towel then head southeast into the Kitchen.
   First thing you should notice is the cook and the cupboard. When you can see something in the cupboard, try to take it. (Doesn’t work, does it?) Ask the cook about the cupboard to get an idea of what to do next. Wait until you can see a wine glass, then put the piece of fruit in the cupboard. Immediately after, take the wine glass. Now, wait until the cupboard opens up to the red dye, put the water in the cupboard and get the dye. Pour the dye in the wine glass. Third, wait for the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster to appear. Put Ford’s satchel in the cupboard (sorry Ford!), take the blaster, then pour the blaster in the wine glass. Finally (I know it’s long), wait for the heatproof tray, put the red dye in the cupboard, get the heatproof tray, and put the blaster and tray in the Thing. Go to the northwest and then to the north.
   Give the blaster to the First-Class Idiot (he will become knocked out from the the blaster), search the idiot to get his card. Go south, southwest, down, east, and north. You will now enter DARK. Where you go now is randomised.


*Morpher Ship*
   Go north. Get the gun. West, and remember what’s in the room. East, north, remember objects. South, east, again, remember objects. Now head southeast. In your words: wait, what?
   From here, walk around the five main rooms, looking at the objects and shooting objects that were not there before (but never the orange button!). Keep LOOKing, or you might not realise there are objects in the room that there aren't. Once you have shot him, search the captain. Go back to the Entry Hallway, and finally head south. You will now enter DARK. (See below for what to do after here.)

*Milliways, after the Morpher Ship*
   Go up and northeast. There's a cop who wants to talk to you. Talk to the policeman.
   He tells you to sign your name to pay for the bill. But, you're not technically legally allowed to be here since you have no reservation. So you can’t write that. (Go on, try it if you want.) But… you have an automatic signature pen. So write on the phone with the pen. Now go southwest, down, east and north. You will now enter DARK.


*Golgafrincham Ark B*
   Examine the captain. He is holding a dish of meat. Ask him about the dish. Ask him for it, then take it. Now just wait until you are sent back to DARK.


*Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency*
   Search the papers and you you will have a bottle opener. Go west. Go down five times. Open the door and you should now be in DARK.


*Planetary Design Workshop*
   There’s a lot in this room. You might want to examine it all. To start off, put all in the thing then get the wrench. Read the notebook. (Do this as many times as you want.)
   Look at Slartibartfast. Ask him for the blue test tube, and take it. Hmm… What else is blue and might fit that? Oh, well, you might not get this, but the blue frob. Look up the frob in the Guide. Show the blue frob to Slarty, and you will understand. Try putting the blue frob in the blue test tube, but you first have to find its true form - examine the frob. Then feel the ridge. Pull it apart. Surprise! A penknife. Put that in the test tube. Done. Now put the blue frob in the blue test tube, and put the test tube on the test tube rack.
   Examine the teleporter. Ask Slarty about it. (Broken!) Just don’t enter it or you will be VERY stuck.
   Slartibartfast should have given you the device now. If not, wait a little longer. He mentions a code that you have to enter - ask Slarty about the code. Remember it. Now look at the device. It has a dial  Turn the dial to the first digit, then push the button. (Yes, push the button every time.) Turn the dial to the second digit, then push the button. Get the peanut packet. Examine the 
   Look around. If you can see a key, take the key and the box then unlock the box with the key. If you see a claw, take the claw and the egg then open the egg with the claw. Get the green frob and show it to Slarty. Put the green frob in the green tube. Put all but the towel and the device in the Thing. Set the dial to the third digit of the code. Drop the device. Now, enter the teleporter. You go go to DARK, then to the Fjords. Go to the Fjords then come back afterwards.
 [Once back from the Fjords...]
   Now that you're back, put the red frob on the computer like Slartibartfast says. Wait until the computer explodes. Get the red rhombicosidodecahedron, and put it in the red tube. Put the red tube on the rack.
   Now the teleporting chamber has lit up! Enter the teleporter. You are sent to DARK...


*Fjord*
   DISCLAIMER: This section has a horrible premise, especially for those using screenreaders. The whole idea of this part is finding the red frob and the philosophical word. The red frob is fine, but finding the philosophical word is badly done. See if you can do it. The word IS in this walkthrough, anyway.
   Head northeast, southeast, northeast, southeast to the Icy Pillar. Jump into the water. Swim east and southeast. Try to go up, but it's too high to reach. So climb on the rock with the towel then enter the passage.
   Go north to the worst view you've ever seen. It's so bad, so go back south. Get the frob you uncovered. Now go back south again. Go down and southeast, get the plank, go up and northeast, then put the plank across the chasm, and go east across the chasm.
   Head south, southeast, north, and east twice to the dead end. Turn back and go west, south and down the stairs. [And now is the word!] Say "mrkug". You will be sent to the DARK, then back to the Planetary Design Workshop.


*Big Bang Burger Bar*
   Go north. Examine the register. (Do this as many times as you want, providing you don't run out of time.) Write your name on the register with the pencil. But apparently it’s not actually on the register. Hmm. You'll have to write the signature on the register with the automatic signature pen. Now just wait until you get sent back to DARK.


*Milliways, after all the above has been completed*
   Go up then northeast. For safety, put everything but the towel in the Thing. Get the bottle opener. Head east.
   Talk to Clyde and remove his panel with the bottle opener. Drop the opener. Tell Clyde to unlock the safe. Open the safe then get the keyset and walk southwest. Go southeast into the kitchen.
   Get the tray, peanuts, and dish of meat from the Thing. Put the meat on the the tray, then open the peanut packet and empty it onto the tray. Remove the sporfe and blaster. Pour some blaster on the tray with the sporfe. Get the wrench from the Thing. Examine the sink and fix it with the wrench before dropping the wrench and the sporfe. Put the tray in the sink, then turn on the sink. Get the tray, search the pots and pans to discover an oven and open the oven. Put the tray in the oven and close the oven. Switch on the oven. Open the oven. Get your dinner (yay!). Head northwest to the Dining Hall, and EAT YOUR DINNER.
   Okay... Try checking your score. (You'll have to press enter.) Now quickly go southwest, down, and east to have a chat with Marvin.
   Now that you are beginning to feel depressed, tell Marvin to unlock Hotblack Desiato's Stunt Ship. Give Marvin the keyset so he can actually do it. Finally, before entering the ship, ask Marvin for the radio. Now... East.


*Stunt Ship*
   Wait quite a few times until the area you're in becomes a Small, Empty Ship. Now, here comes the action!
   Plug the radio into the loudspeaker, then drop the radio here. Call for help. Remember the sequence given. Enter the teleportation pod. (It's not working yet, in case you were wondering.) Get the remote control. Push each of the four buttons in the sequence, in turn, onto the remote control. Now the pod should be working. Wondered what the big red button on the console does? It activates the booth! But you can't reach it from here. However, Marvin can. Tell him to push the big red button to win the game.