<span class="wait">Charlie has a knack for saying the wrong thing. Last night we were at Aidan’s birthday party, and because he’s our boss, we went around the table saying nice things about him.
<div class="centerAll button5 nice"><span class="nice X">Nice things we said</span></div></span>
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<div class="na"><span class="n1">We Love You!</span></div>
<div class="nb"><span class="n2">You're Amazing!</span></div>
<div class="nc"><span class="n3">Bless your heart!</span></div>
<div class="nd"><span class="n4">We are so lucky to have you!</span></div>
<div class="ne"><span class="n5">We wish you many more!</span></div>
<div class="nf"><span class="n6">I love your birthday more than I love my own!</span></div>
</div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class='sprinkle hidden'>We sprinkled our feelings with a lot of exclamations points!!!!<br><br>Because that is what people do!
<span class="bottomLink">[[But Charlie|Charlie Said]]</span></span></div>
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<div class="paragraph"><div class="narratorX timer0">|typed-speed0>[Expect the second half of your life to be worse than the first.]</div>
<div class="narratorX timer1">|typed-speed0>[Look forward to deterioration, slowness, and the malfunctioning of your valves.]</div>
<div class="narratorX timer2">|typed-speed0>[Start looking for a plumber.]</div>
<div class="narratorX timer3">|typed-speed0>[Have you done anything worth remembering? Because I cannot remember.]</div>
<div class="narratorX timer4">|typed-speed0>[So many people on the street and you are one of them. Congratulations.]</div>
<div class="timer8">...And that's when you knew Charlie was a <span class='wordModal Z'>robot</span></div>
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<div class="narratorX">Look forward to deterioration, slowness, and the malfunctioning of your valves.</div>
<div class="narratorX">Start looking for a plumber.</div>
<div class="narratorX">Have you done anything worth remembering? Because I cannot remember.</div>
<div class="narratorX">So many people on the street and you are one of them. Congratulations.</div>
...And that's when you knew Charlie was a <span class='wordModal Z'>robot</span>
<div class='centerAll'><span class='buttonM X'>Activate Amplif-Eye®</span><div class="Y hidden"><span class='bottomLink'>[[Charlie's code|code]]</span></div></div></div>
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</div>}<p class="storyTitle">by Fernando J. Contreras</p>
<center>What the experts are saying:
<span class="quotes">|typed-speed0-showCursor-0>["It's like the Uber of interactive fiction."
"imagine Game of Thrones meets Geico Insurance!" (sponsored)
"Charlie The Robot made me question my position on black holes. Perhaps it's true that, deep in our hearts, every one of us has a black hole."<br>— Stephen Hawking
"A motherboarding epic adventure! A must read for all robots."</center>]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="bottomLink">[[Back to Menu|Table of Contents]]</span> <span class="bottomLink">[[Begin Game|Part I Mitch]]</span></div>
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But there are deeper levels of sophistication, such as the alogrithms that deal with <span class="improvModal popupLink">decision-making and improvisation</span>.
Sometimes, though, I don’t know; the day gets away from Charlie and he malfunctions.
<div class="centerLinks"><span class="bottomLink">[[Ask Charlie|askCharlie]]</span> <span class="bottomLink">[[Fear of Robots|fearOfRobots]]</span></div>
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<div class="centerAll"><p class="blueDotted hiddenText3 kill">Would you ever kill a human?</p><span class="insertKill"></span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><p class="redDotted fearModal hiddenText4">What do you fear?</p></div>
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<div class="centerLinks hiddenText5"><span class="bottomLink fear">[[Fear of Robots|fearOfRobots]]</span> <span class="meeting hidden bottomLink">[[The Meeting|Meeting With Lana]]</span></div>
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}Some say it's a good thing that we've programmed robots to do menial tasks because it gives the impression they aren’t better than us.
But we know the technology has been there for a long time; we just don’t crank it up because we’re afraid of being replaced.
Meanwhile, others think robots should be servants. But that prompted questions regarding poverty and the lack of education. If we program robots to perform the degrading work that keeps our world running, what do we do with the millions that only know how to push buttons and <span class='overPop popupLink'>clean toilets</span>?
At Hiremy & Hirschl we answered the question in the most philosophical way. Our head of marketing told us, "Out of all possible scenarios, we are living in the best one. That means this is the way things are because that's the way they were meant to be. And isn't it great?" So we patted each other on the back instead and toasted with a round of Piste®.
Robots live in the middle. They perform ordinary tasks. They work as accountants, managers, assistants, lawyers, developers, human resources, and so on.
However, one thing is to tweak the level of intelligence in a robot, and another is to pretend glitches are part of the programming. What if Charlie snaps and rips the limbs off of a baby?
<div class="centerAll"><span class="bottomLink ask">[[Ask Charlie|askCharlie]]</span> <span class="bottomLink meeting hidden">[[The Meeting|Meeting With Lana]]</span></div>
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}Aidan called a meeting to introduce the new assistant, <span class="popupLink LanaModal">Lana</span>, and he instated a mandatory name tag protocol for two days to give Lana time to learn our names.
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="myTag">My tag</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="LanaTag">Lana's tag</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="CharlieTag">Charlie's tag</span></div>
Lana looked at me as if asking, “Robot?” And I gave her the look of, “Yes, robot,” and rolled my eyes.
We went around the table doing introductions. What's your role in the company? What's your favorite obsolete technology? Tell me something interesting about yourself. <span class="popupLink thing">That sort of thing</span>.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="bottomLink">[[Office Pranks|Office Pranks]]</span></div>
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</div>}During football season, we'd give Charlie all of our unfinished work, and he would spend the whole weekend getting it ready.
By Monday he'd look exhausted. This went on past the Superbowl and well into spring training. We intended to make it a year-round sort of thing, but then Aidan told us Charlie doesn’t plug into a wall. He needs to sleep to recharge, like ordinary humans, and we were like, "But isn't it true that artificial feelings lead to artificial suffering?"
That’s the first time I noticed the look. He gave me this look of bitterness, the look of someone who could foster hostility and wait for the right moment to act on it.
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="random">Other Jokes</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="botHeads">Even Lana joined the fun!</span></div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="bottomLink">[[Chino's Bar|ChinosBar]]</span></div>
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I was making out with Lana, and her husband spotted us. He screamed from across the bar and came at me.
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[[Date with Florence|Florence]]</div>
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We convinced Charlie to go out with her and record the event. We dared him to take her out to this greasy joint on the food court, to order seven burgers and seven milkshakes, and have them served to Florence.
We wanted to see how she'd react. Call it an experiment. Can robots feel self-conscious? Can they act humiliated? How deep is their level of consciousness?
It's an important experiment, right? Well, it was a disappointment.
Charlie didn’t have “the heart” to go through with it. Instead he took her to the executive restaurant on the 195th floor, and treated her to a romantic dinner. I don't even have clearance to the 195th, and this mindless robot... So frustrating.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="dinner button5">[[During dinner|Dinner]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>
to: Aidan Stoke (aidan_stoke@hiremyhirschl.com)
from: Mitch Cahill (super_mitch@hiremyhirschl.com)
Subject: Beware of the toasters.
Aidan,
Nobody loves robots more than me. Ask around. But this Charlie situation has become so intolerable, I have decided to risk my position at Hiremy & Hirschl and object to the company's support of the Robot Act.
November 3: Charlie has been hacking my communications. My email attachments, which were meant to be weekly reports, meeting updates, etc., opened as photos of extinct <span class="poodlePoster popupLink">animals</span>. Showing them to you will be giving into Charlie's game, so I won't. However, who else has been moralizing about dead animals ad nauseam?
November 10: An "anonymous" package was delivered to my desk. It was a rope and the message, "don't hang up on me." I know it was Charlie because that day, every time he walked by my desk he said hello to me like, "how is it hanging, partner," in a sinister, fake robot voice.
November 22: My wife got a video of me eating a turkey sandwich with another woman. The video was doctored, as it is obvious I cannot afford turkey. She didn't believe me, though, and now I have been forced to give her half my ration of protein paste, half my Koppa®, and a third of my Piste®.
December 3: Charlie hacked my social media account and "liked" posts of religious groups against the <span class="thanks4Children popupLink">Procreation Act and the Genetic Screening Act</span>. I did not do such a thing. My political affiliations, as you know, align themselves perfectly with those of Hiremy & Hirschl.
The Office Party: It happened fast, but I heard from others that Charlie malfunctioned once more. If Lana's husband hit Charlie, I'm sure it was an act of self-defense.
I would instead focus on the fact Charlie was dangerously out of line. He was wrapping threats in a pedantic game of horoscope. What seemed innocuous was a discriminatory act against the human race. People were gasping in disbelief.
Charlie also told people that the entire Mars population died three years ago, that they murdered each other, and that the <span class="ISGLetter popupLink">ISG has been lying</span> to us this whole time. Those claims alone give grounds for discontinuation.
Robot failure is a serious matter. When Charlie did not bring a gift to the Christmas exchange party, he failed to give another person the chance to be happy. Graham did not get a Christmas gift, and he was heartsick. Everybody was networking, showing off their gifts, and Graham was sitting alone in a corner, drowning himself in a dozen Chinx & Tonix®.
Charlie blamed me, but if you are to survive in the human world, you should be able to distinguish a truth from a lie. So when I told him not to bring any gifts to the party, Charlie should’ve known I was lying.
As for me, I have a wife and a son. I’m king of the castle. Charlie has nothing. Even if he were to make more money than me, which he won’t because he’s not programmed to be a leader (no one would follow), what is money to a robot if it does not care to spend it? What is the purpose of success and honor if a machine can't feel recognition? Humans might make more mistakes, but life without the joys of human error is a tedious one.
I hope Hiremy & Hirschl makes the right decision and puts Charlie out of circulation before he kills someone.
My best,
Mitch Cahill
Information Executive, division A354-b
Section 44, 63rd Floor
"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together." - Marilyn Monroe
<hr>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="button5">[[BUT BEFORE YOU GO|ISG Introduction]]</span></div>
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<hr>
|typed-speed0>[Congratulations! Only <span class="percentage"></span>% of readers have gotten this far.
It's Mitch. Even though his life-story is full of anxiety, abuse, and good laughs, he just can't tell it well.]
<div class="Y"><div class="centerAll"><span>How can Mitch improve?</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="select">Use more adverbs</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="select">Bangs!! More bangs!!</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="select">A low carb diet</span></div>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="select">Green screen special effects</span></div></div><div class="hiddenText5 X">(either: "Hmmm, okay. We offered three great answers and one bad one, and you... oh boy, it's okay.", "Wow! Our thoughts exactly, more or less, hmm... well, not quite.", "That's the sort of answer that will change the world.", "But what about... okay, that's what we get for asking.")
We've been meaning to ask, have you considered moving to Mars? You look like you have that colonizing spirit, that “I need to accomplish a rare feat so I can justify my existence” kind of charm. You’ll be our Ferdinand Magellan, our Edmund Hillary, our Steven Spielberg.
You’ll be remembered as a hero!<br><br>Plus it’s perfectly safe.
More than ten million people have already gone “RED” and nobody has returned.
Where else can you beat those odds?
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="button5">[[I'll think about it|lobby]]</span></div></div>
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<hr>
|typed-speed0>[What did you think of Mitch's prejudice against women?]
<div class="centerAll Y"><span class="button5">[[He's a vulgar misogynist!|submitAnswer]]</span><br><br><span class="button5">[[Subtle and in good taste.|submitAnswer2]]</span></div>
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<hr>
<div class="hidden">Thank you for agreeing to take this incredibly long survey. You’ll love it. It’s full of great moments.
Some say it’s the Anna Karenina of surveys. Others say it’s like surfing the coast of California, back when the waves were not crashing down like a wall of cinder blocks and California was not at the bottom of the Pacific.
You are a merely 10,000 points away from getting the chance to leave this dying planet. Most people score less than 100, but that's because they don't pay attention to this Albert Camus quote: "The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion."
In other words, not because someone offers you a shit sandwich it means you have to eat it. The same goes for money. Don't eat money. It's not healthy.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[Back|lobby]]</span></div></div><div class="main">|typed-speed0>[Thank you for agreeing to take this incredibly long survey. You’ll love it. It’s full of great moments.
Some say it’s the Anna Karenina of surveys. Others say it’s like surfing the coast of California, back when the waves were not crashing down like a wall of cinder blocks and California was not at the bottom of the Pacific.
You are a merely 10,000 points away from getting the chance to leave this dying planet. Most people score less than 100, but that's because they don't pay attention to this Albert Camus quote: "The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion."
In other words, not because someone offers you a shit sandwich it means you have to eat it. The same goes for money. Don't eat money. It's not healthy.]
(live: 8s)[<div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[Back|lobby]]</span></div></div>]<div class="backgroundLogo">(align:"=><=")[<div class="isgLogo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/ISG-Logo.png" width="200"></div>]</div>
<hr>
<div class="hidden">Do you ever feel like the rules on Earth are unreasonable, like it's too hard for human beings to advance?<br><br>Do you wonder why it takes centuries to get a consensus on obvious realities like "the world is not flat" or "slavery is cruel"?
If you feel like the human race often fails to understand the "big picture", it might be because conditions on Earth are not suitable for you. It's that easy: this is not the right planet for you!
Luckily, now you can improve your future by helping us colonize a more reddish planet, one that grants you the freedom to collect as many rocks and sand as your soul desires!
Choose the right slogan for our marketing campaign and win instant prizes! (10 points)
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan2" value="bestOption"/> Mars: The best option available, considering.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan2" value="humanProof"/> Mars: It's already in ruins, so it’s human-proof.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan2" value="warmongers"/> Mars: The perfect arena for a race of warmongers.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan2" value="winWin"/> Mars: No water to pollute, no animals to kill. It’s a win-win.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan2" value="thnkRedly"/> Mars: Think Redly.<br><br><span class="submitButton2 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div><div class="main">|typed-speed0>[Do you ever feel like the rules on Earth are unreasonable, like it's too hard for human beings to advance?
Do you wonder why it takes centuries to get a consensus on obvious realities like "the world is not flat" or "slavery is cruel"?
If you feel like the human race often fails to understand the "big picture", it might be because conditions on Earth are not suitable for you. It's that easy: this is not the right planet for you!]
<div class="timer">Luckily, now you can improve your future by helping us colonize a more reddish planet, one that grants you the freedom to collect as many rocks and sand as your soul desires!
Choose the right slogan for our marketing campaign and win instant prizes! (10 points)
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan" value="bestOption" /> Mars: The best option available, considering.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan" value="humanProof" /> Mars: It's already in ruins, so it’s human-proof.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan" value="warmongers" /> Mars: The perfect arena for a race of warmongers.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan" value="winWin" /> Mars: No water to pollute, no animals to kill. It’s a win-win.
<input type="radio" name="marsSlogan" value="thnkRedly" /> Mars: Think Redly.
<span class="submitButton2 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></div>
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</script>}<div class="centerAll XZ"><br><br>DID IT WORK?<br>DID WE LIFT YOUR SPIRITS?<br>WE SURE HOPE SO!
<span class="button5">[[I'M FIRED UP!|welcome]]</span></div>
<div class="centerAll blinkText">WINNER!<br>WINNER!<br>WINNER!</div>
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<script>startTypedModule();</script><div class="Z"><div class="centerAll"><span class="boxTitle">EARN ENOUGH POINTS AND<br>WIN A TRIP TO MARS!<br>SCORE = <span class="totalCar"></span> pts</span></div><br>
<div class="bottomLink2"><span class="boxSpan">[[INSTRUCTIONS|Instructions]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes two"><span class="boxSpan">[[EVALUATE MITCH|Evaluate Mitch]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes three"><span class="boxSpan">[[A TALE OF TWO PLANETS|uncomfortable life]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes four"><span class="boxSpan">[[THE VALUE OF A LIFE|value of life]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes five"><span class="boxSpan">[[TRAINS AND MATH|Jews]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes six"><span class="boxSpan">[[QUOTABLE QUOTES|Quotable Quotes]]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes seven"><span class="boxSpan">[[200 YEARS OF AWESOME|200 Years Question]]</span></div>
<div class="bottomLink2"><span class="boxSpan">[[FINAL SCORE|exit]]</span></div></div>
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<hr>
<div class="main">|typed-speed0>[Our thoughts exactly!
We’ll pass your message verbatim and tell Mitch he should jump into a wood chipper, and that his baby boy looks like a toad that gets slimier and more bloated the more you kiss it.
Mitch will appreciate your comments. He will grow from them. Constructive criticism is as healthy as eating an apple a day, I imagine.
I don’t have a way to test that theory, since the days of the apple are long gone and the generation who ate the last of them is dead.
I suppose I just answered my own question in regards to health and apples.
With that in mind, which condition would you dial all the way up in your person? Please choose only one (10 points)]
<span class='timer'><input type="radio" name="property" value="ugliness" /> Physical ugliness
<input type="radio" name="property" value="stupidity" /> Stupidity
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cowardice" /> Cowardice
<input type="radio" name="property" value="addiction" /> Substance addiction
<input type="radio" name="property" value="zealotry" /> Religious zealotry
<input type="radio" name="property" value="serialKiller" /> Serial killer
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cholesterol" /> Cholesterol
<input type="radio" name="property" value="worms" /> Worms nesting inside your ears<BR>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="submitButton6 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></span>
</div><div class="hidden">Our thoughts exactly!
We’ll pass your message verbatim and tell Mitch he should jump into a wood chipper, and that his baby boy looks like a toad that gets slimier and more bloated the more you kiss it.
Mitch will appreciate your comments. He will grow from them. Constructive criticism is as healthy as eating an apple a day, I imagine.
I don’t have a way to test that theory, since the days of the apple are long gone and the generation who ate the last of them is dead.
I suppose I just answered my own question in regards to health and apples.
With that in mind, which condition would you dial all the way up in your person? Please choose only one (10 points)
<input type="radio" name="property" value="ugliness" /> Physical ugliness
<input type="radio" name="property" value="stupidity" /> Stupidity
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cowardice" /> Cowardice
<input type="radio" name="property" value="addiction" /> Substance addiction
<input type="radio" name="property" value="zealotry" /> Religious zealotry
<input type="radio" name="property" value="serialKiller" /> Serial killer
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cholesterol" /> Cholesterol
<input type="radio" name="property" value="worms" /> Worms nesting inside your ears<BR>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="submitButton6 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></div><br>
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<hr>
<span class="main">|typed-speed0>[One word of advice about this survey: Careful. These linguistic metaphors have the power to reveal your innermost virtues and/or depravities.
Now choose the one you believe has the highest value (10 points.)]
<span class="Y"><input type="radio" name="highest" value="salt" /><span class="unlimitedSteak"> Unlimited steak for life.</span><span class="newSteak"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="prophet" /><span class="prophetVision"> Prophetic vision.</span><span class="newVision"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="medal" /><span class="goldChest"> A chest of gold.</span><span class="newGold"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="hamster" /><span class="cheetahSpeed"> Having the speed of a cheetah.</span><span class="newCheetah"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="robot" /><span class="greatLove"> Being loved by the person of your dreams.</span><span class="newLove"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="gum" /><span class="bestHealthCare"> Access to the best healthcare system in the world.</span><span class="newHealthCare"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="baby" /><span class="beautifulBaby"> A beautiful baby.</span><span class="newBaby"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="poem" /><span class="greatIntelligence"> Wisdom and intelligence.</span><span class="newIntelligence"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="woman" /><span class="kingQueen"> To be the King/Queen of a great empire.</span><span class="newEmpire"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="ticket" /><span class="jetPlane"> A jetplane at your disposal 24/7/365 for indefinite use.</span><span class="newJet"></span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="submitButton3 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></div></span></span><span class="hidden">One word of advice about this survey: Careful. These linguistic metaphors have the power to reveal your innermost virtues and/or depravities.
Now choose the one you believe has the highest value (10 points.)
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="salt" /><span class="unlimitedSteak"> Unlimited steak for life.</span><span class="newSteak"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="prophet" /><span class="prophetVision"> Prophetic vision.</span><span class="newVision"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="medal" /><span class="goldChest"> A chest of gold.</span><span class="newGold"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="hamster" /><span class="cheetahSpeed"> Having the speed of a cheetah.</span><span class="newCheetah"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="robot" /><span class="greatLove"> Being loved by the person of your dreams.</span><span class="newLove"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="gum" /><span class="bestHealthCare"> Access to the best healthcare system in the world.</span><span class="newHealthCare"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="baby" /><span class="beautifulBaby"> A beautiful baby.</span><span class="newBaby"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="poem" /><span class="greatIntelligence"> Wisdom and intelligence.</span><span class="newIntelligence"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="woman" /><span class="kingQueen"> To be the King/Queen of a great empire.</span><span class="newEmpire"></span>
<input type="radio" name="highest" value="ticket" /><span class="jetPlane"> A jetplane at your disposal 24/7/365 for indefinite use.</span><span class="newJet"></span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="submitButton3 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></div></span>
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<hr>{(set: $points to (random: 5,10))}
<span class="main">|typed-speed0>[You are doing well. Next question (10 points.)
If a train arrives fifteen minutes late to Pennsylvania station, and when it arrives you realize it’s wall-to-wall packed with Jews, you...]
<span class="Y"><input type="radio" name="jews" value="getIn" /> Get in.
<input type="radio" name="jews" value="wait" /> Wait for the next one.
<span class="submitButton4 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></span></span><span class="hidden">You are doing well. Next question (10 points.)
If a train arrives fifteen minutes late to Pennsylvania station, and when it arrives you realize it’s wall-to-wall packed with Jews, you...
<input type="radio" name="jews" value="getIn" /> Get in.
<input type="radio" name="jews" value="wait" /> Wait for the next one.
<span class="submitButton4 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></span>
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<hr>
<span class="main">|typed-speed0>[1) In this age of information overload, we are lucky to still count with the guidance of some of the greatest minds ever to have existed. Which of the following quotes describe you best? Please choose only one. (10 points)]
<span class='timer'><input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="deathFriend" /> "Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody is watching." Seneca
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash" /> “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.” Friedrich Nietzsche
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash2" /> "It's not the number of breaths we take, but the number of moments that take our breath away." Simone de Beauvoir
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="intelligence" /> "Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery and today is a gift. That's why we call it the present." Marcus Aurelius
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash" /> "People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." Soren Kierkegaard
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="deathFriend" /> "Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain." Arthur Schopenhauer
<span class="submitButton1 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></span></span><span class="hidden">1) In this age of information overload, we are lucky to still count with the guidance of some of the greatest minds ever to have existed. Which of the following quotes describe you best? Please choose only one. (10 points)
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="deathFriend" /> "Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody is watching." Seneca
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash" /> “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.” Friedrich Nietzsche
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash2" /> "It's not the number of breaths we take, but the number of moments that take our breath away." Simone de Beauvoir
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="intelligence" /> "Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery and today is a gift. That's why we call it the present." Marcus Aurelius
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="carCrash" /> "People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." Soren Kierkegaard
<input type="radio" name="appreciate" value="deathFriend" /> "Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain." Arthur Schopenhauer
<span class="submitButton1 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span>
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<hr>
|typed-speed0>[Would you change your body parts to become a machine if this would extend your life by 200+ years?]
<span class="Y"><div class="centerAll"><p class="hidden">Who are we kidding?</p><span class="button5">[[YES|200 years]]</span> <span class="noButton button5">No</span></div></span>
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<div class="centerAll timer">
<span class="part1">PART I<br>Mitch</span>
<span class='button5'>[[GROUND FLOOR|Chapter 1]]</span>
</div>
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<hr>
<div class="main">|typed-speed0>[You don't have to be modest. We hear you: there's nothing wrong with women as long as they stay in their place.
You want to oppress half of your population?
We commend you. That makes sense.
Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!
But now is time for you to set your bananas aside for a little while. Next question:
Which condition would you dial all the way up in your person? Please choose only one (10 points)]
<span class='timer'><input type="radio" name="property" value="ugliness" /> Physical ugliness
<input type="radio" name="property" value="stupidity" /> Stupidity
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cowardice" /> Cowardice
<input type="radio" name="property" value="addiction" /> Substance addiction
<input type="radio" name="property" value="zealotry" /> Religious zealotry
<input type="radio" name="property" value="serialKiller" /> Serial killer
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cholesterol" /> Cholesterol
<input type="radio" name="property" value="worms" /> Worms nesting inside your ears<BR>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="submitButton6 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div></span>
</div><div class="hidden">You don't have to be modest. We hear you: there's nothing wrong with women as long as they stay in their place.
You want to oppress half of your population?
We commend you. That makes sense.
Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!
But now is time for you to set your bananas aside for a little while. Next question:
Which condition would you dial all the way up in your person? Please choose only one (10 points)
<input type="radio" name="property" value="ugliness" /> Physical ugliness
<input type="radio" name="property" value="stupidity" /> Stupidity
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cowardice" /> Cowardice
<input type="radio" name="property" value="addiction" /> Substance addiction
<input type="radio" name="property" value="zealotry" /> Religious zealotry
<input type="radio" name="property" value="serialKiller" /> Serial killer
<input type="radio" name="property" value="cholesterol" /> Cholesterol
<input type="radio" name="property" value="worms" /> Worms nesting inside your ears<br>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="submitButton6 button5">[[SUBMIT|lobby]]</span></div><br></div>
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<hr>{(set: $points to (random: 5,10))}
<span class="main">|typed-speed0>[Nice choice!
Now that you can live for 200+ years, what would you do? Choose the option that best reflects your character (10 points.)]
<span class="Y"><form><input type="radio" name="characterA" value="newLanguage" /> <span class="removeText">Learn a new language.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="buyWeapons" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Buy weapons to defend myself and my family from the mercenaries and pirates.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="travel" /> <span class="removeText">Travel around the world and enjoy different cultures.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="newVirus" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Study medicine in hopes I can discover a new virus that can kill at least half of the population.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="playSports" /> <span class="removeText">Play sports.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="makeFriends" /> <span class="removeText">Make new friends and drink alcohol with them.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="liveInFear" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Live in fear of being enslaved and molested for 200+ years.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="hopeful" /> <span class="removeText">Remain hopeful and sing songs. Everything happens for a reason.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="nothing" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Even if I live 1000+ years, I will not add much value to the universe.</span></form>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="nothingButton button5">CHEAT</span> <span class="submitButton5 button5">[[FINAL ANSWER|lobby]]</span><br></div></span></span><span class="hidden">Nice choice!
Now that you can live for 200+ years, what would you do? Choose the option that best reflects your character (10 points.)
<form><input type="radio" name="characterA" value="newLanguage" /> <span class="removeText">Learn a new language.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="buyWeapons" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Buy weapons to defend myself and my family from the mercenaries and pirates.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="travel" /> <span class="removeText">Travel around the world and enjoy different cultures.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="newVirus" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Study medicine in hopes I can discover a new virus that can kill at least half of the population.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="playSports" /> <span class="removeText">Play sports.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="makeFriends" /> <span class="removeText">Make new friends and drink alcohol with them.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="liveInFear" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Live in fear of being enslaved and molested for 200+ years.</span>
<input type="radio" name="characterA" value="hopeful" /> <span class="removeText">Remain hopeful and sing songs. Everything happens for a reason.</span>
<input type="radio" name="character" value="nothing" /> <span class="rightAnswer">Even if I live 1000+ years, I will not add much value to the universe.</span></form>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="nothingButton button5">CHEAT</span> <span class="submitButton5 button5">[[FINAL ANSWER|lobby]]</span><br></div></span>
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<hr>
<span class="loser main">|typed-speed0>[We'd like to say that we are proud of you, but we can't because you didn't score a minimum of 10,000 points, which would have granted you passage to live in Mars amongst the Elite®.
You do get a wonderful <span class="popupLink prize">prize</span>.
We will continue to monitor your life in order to further our research. You don't need to do a thing. Your communication devices have already been synched to our system.
Now take off your clothes.]
|typed-speed0-delay3500>[Come on, don’t be shy. We’ll give you a minute. Wait, let me turn the camera on.]
|typed-delay4000>[Here we are.
Hello.]
|typed-speed0-delay2000>[Hello?
Is that you?]
|typed-speed0-delay2000>[Hmm, to be honest, we were expecting something different. Something more... oh, well. You may disrobe. In the meantime, here’s something to get us in the mood.<span class="popupLink musicMaestro"> Music, maestro!</span>]
<div class="centerDiv Y"><span class="button5">[[BEGIN PART II|Part II Aidan]]</span></div></span><span class="winner main2">|typed-speed0>[Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!
You scored a total of <span class="totalCar"></span> points, which means you have earned the chance to live in Mars with people as smart as you. Say goodbye to the fools!
In order for this offer to be activated we must continue to monitor your life. You don't need to do a thing. Your communication devices have already been synched to our system.
It's our way of saying, 'We'll be in touch.']
<div class="centerDiv Y"><span class="button5">[[BEGIN PART II|Part II Aidan]]</span></div></span><span class="hiddenText">We'd like to say that we are proud of you, but we can't because you didn't score a minimum of 10,000 points, which would have granted you passage to live in Mars amongst the Elite®.
You do get a wonderful <span class="popupLink prize">prize</span>.
We will continue to monitor your life in order to further our research. You don't need to do a thing. Your communication devices have already been synched to our system.
Now take off your clothes.
Come on, don’t be shy. We’ll give you a minute. Wait, let me turn the camera on.
Here we are.
Hello.
Hello?
Is that you?
Hmm, to be honest, we were expecting something different. Something more... oh, well. You may disrobe. In the meantime, here’s something to get us in the mood.<span class="popupLink musicMaestro"> Music, maestro!</span>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="button5">[[BEGIN PART II|Part II Aidan]]</span></div></span><span class="hiddenText2">Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!
You scored a total of <span class="totalCar"></span> points, which means you have earned the chance to live in Mars with people as smart as you. Say goodbye to the fools!
In order for this offer to be activated we must continue to monitor your life. You don't need to do a thing. Your communication devices have already been synched to our system.
It's our way of saying, 'We'll be in touch.'
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="button5">[[BEGIN PART II|Part II Aidan]]</span></div></span>
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<span class="part1">PART II<br>Aidan</span>
<div class='button5'>[[GROUND FLOOR - LEVEL 2|Chapter 2]]</div>
<div class='button5'>(link-goto: "Main Menu", "Table of Contents")</div>
<div class='button5'>{(link:"Save game")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game saved!](else: )[Sorry, I couldn't save your game.]]</div>}</div>
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<span class="uno">Charlie</span> <span class="dos">the</span> <span class="tres">Robot</span></div></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class='autor'>by Fernando J. Contreras</span></div>
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<div class="centerAll barra"><span class="X">"I</span> <span class="Y">KNOW</span> <span class="Z">YOUR</span> <span class="ZZ">FUTURE!"</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="tableContents bottomLink">[[Table of Contents|Table of Contents]]</span></div>
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</style>}Most of the time I cannot tell them apart. I know that’s the point, but they become your life, and that makes them easy to detest. They need directions, commands, guidelines, bullet points, presentations, emails. Not a single original thought.
<div class="centerAll">All I hear all day is...</div><div class="centerAll container">
<span class="s1">Aidan this, Aidan that</span>
<span class="s2">Aidan can you clarify your report?</span>
<span class="s3">Aidan this is too hard.</span>
<span class="s4">Aidan when will I get to go to the 195th floor?</span>
<span class="s5">Aidan, would you tell him to stop stealing my Piste®?</span>
<span class="s6">Aidan, I feel uncomfotable with expression X. Can we instead call it Y?</span>
<span class="s7">Aidan, what are your expectations?
<span class="s8">Aidan, can we leave early?</span>
<span class="s9">Aidan where is the brandy?</span>
<span class="s10">Aidan, will there be firings?</span>
<span class="s11">Aidan, do you think Hiremy & Hirschl will change protocols?</span>
<span class="s12">Aidan, are we becoming obsolete? Aidan, how can I prove to you I'm Elite®?</span>
<span class="s13">Aidan, I can do more. Aidan, this load is excessive.</span>
<span class="s14">Aidan, this is not fair.</span>
<span class="s15"></span></div>
<div class="s20">"Now that you've arrived, I hope you behave better than them.
Oh, boy. Look at me. I'm taking it out on you. This is no way to begin our relationship."
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[Let Me Introduce Myself Again|Chapter 2A]]</span></div>
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</style>}"Wonderful. Here's your cup. Come on, have a sip. Tell me what you think. Piste® and cinnamon tea is what the kids are <span class="vodka2 popupLink">drinking these days</span>."
<span class="narrator2">Aidan sits down, and places his hands underneath the desk. He fumbles with something in his pocket. (click:"pocket")[It starts beeping, and Aidan covers it up by coughing.
The holographic poster behind Aidan plays a sequence of scenes.] (click: "scenes")[<br><br><div class="button5 centerAll">In one of them, a man with curly hair wears a black jacket. The material appears to be leather, so it must be a very old advertisement for something. The man leans against a four-wheeled vehicle, so yes, it is vintage. The vehicle emits a bright red light from the hood. The heading reads, "Knight Rider."<br><br>The next image</div> (click-replace:"The next image")[Two men in black suits pointing their guns at something or someone out of frame. They have funny haircuts. The title reads, "Pulp Fiction."<br><br>The next image (click-replace: "The next image")[Six youngsters with fluffy haircuts (lots of hairspray), wearing heavy makeup and baggy clothes. For some reason they smile a lot in front of a fountain. What's so fun about it? I don't know. All I know is they are friends.<br><br>The next image (click-replace:"The next image")[Close-up of a relaxed teenager, fingers laced behind his head, smiling at us. He seems to be extremely happy he had a day off. Day off from what? What's so horrible about what this boy does? Is Ferris Buller a slave? No clues are given.<br><br>The next image (click-replace: "The next image")[Six people, all half human, half screws are being bolted into the Earth by a hand coming from the sky, which holds a screwdriver. The hand is much bigger than the humans, so it'd be accurate to suggest that this is a metaphor of sorts. The title reads: "The Meaning of Life." However, no answers are provided.]]]]]
After he is done, he laces his fingers in a methodical way, sets his hands on top of the desk and looks at you. He's not drinking. For the first time, you see that a small chunk of his mustache is missing.</span>
"Tell me, do you have access to the top floors?"
<span class="narrator2">You do, but you shake your head.</span>
"I'm glad you like the <span class="toldYou popupLink">tea</span>. I don't trust anyone who doesn't drink in the morning."
<span class="narrator2">You take another sip to confirm it doesn't taste like Piste® or cinnamon. The tea, or whatever this is, has a faint metallic taste.
Aidan pulls out a bottle from his desk. Inside the bottle, there's a plastic ring. He dips the ring inside the bottle, brings it to his mouth and starts making bubbles.
He sings one of Hiremy & Hirschl's <span class="popupLink westHam">old jingles</span>:</span>
"I'm forever blowing bubbles,
pretty bubbles in the air,
they fly so high, nearly reach the sky
then like my dreams they fade and die."
(text-style: "fade-in-out")["Do you want more tea?"]
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[I'M FINE, THANKS|nothingHappens]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[I'LL HAVE ONE MORE|bar]]</span></div>
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}"Nothing? I don't remember the last time anyone said no to a free drink. Or to a free anything. Not since the Google Wars."
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Aidan continues:</span>
"This Piste® is special. How can you say no to something that increases your life span and makes you <span class="Piste popupLink">smarter</span>?
You are a strange person, but I suppose you know that. I bet you don't have many friends. Is that why you do these mediation jobs? You fly in, you carpet bomb the place with your judgment, and then you fly out.
Are you sure you don't want a drink?"
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[OK. BUT JUST ONE DRINK|bar]]</span></div>
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</div>}"Wait, what? No Piste®?
But all studies confirm that morning <span class="Piste popupLink">Piste®</span> promotes cardiovascular activity.
Did no one tell you that here at H&H we don't trust anyone who refuses a stiff morning drink?"
<div class="centerDiv"><a class="button6 reply" href="#">Y</a> <a class="button6 reply" href="#">N</a></div>
<div class="insertText">"But how can we trust your answer after you refused a drink, which, studies claim, is the mark of an honest individual?<br><br>Let's see you sip your cup of tea now. Your green tea. Here. It's warm water with a leaf. Drink up. I dropped an extra leaf to make it greener."</div><span class="hiddenText"><span class="narrator2"><br>Aidan takes a big swig from a bottle containing a transparent liquid.
The holographic poster behind Aidan plays a sequence of scenes. (click: "scenes")[<br><br><div class="button5 centerAll">In one of them, a man with curly hair wears a black jacket. The material appears to be leather, so it must be a very old advertisement for something. The man leans against a four-wheeled vehicle, so yes, it is vintage. The vehicle emits a bright red light from the hood. The heading reads, "Knight Rider."<br><br>The next image</div> (click-replace:"The next image")[Two men in black suits pointing their guns at something or someone out of frame. They have funny haircuts. The title reads, "Pulp Fiction."<br><br>The next image (click-replace: "The next image")[Six youngsters with fluffy haircuts (lots of hairspray), wearing heavy makeup and baggy clothes. For some reason they smile a lot in front of a fountain. What's so fun about it? I don't know. All I know is they are friends.<br><br>The next image (click-replace:"The next image")[Close-up of a relaxed teenager, fingers laced behind his head, smiling at us. He seems to be extremely happy he had a day off. Day off from what? What's so horrible about what this boy does? Is Ferris Buller a slave? No clues are given.<br><br>The next image (click-replace: "The next image")[Six people, all half human, half screws are being bolted into the Earth by a hand coming from the sky, which holds a screwdriver. The hand is much bigger than the humans, so it'd be accurate to suggest that this is a metaphor of sorts. The title reads: "The Meaning of Life." However, no answers are provided.]]]]]
After, he leans forward and looks at you, or so it seems, but he's in fact staring at your nose.<br><br>You take a sip. The tea tastes like <span class="toldYou popupLink">cold medicine</span>.</span>
"This tea is purple."
"Why wouldn't it be?" Aidan says. "You said no Piste®. Are you sure you don't want a drink? Fair enough. Tell me, what do you think of Dr. Preston's new <span class="trap popupLink">Desk Relocation plans</span>?"
<div class="centerDiv"><a class="button6 replyAgree" href="#">AGREE</a> <a class="button6 replyDisagree" href="#">DISAGREE</a></div></span>
<span class="hiddenText2">"I'm not surprised to hear you're pro-establishment. What do you think the redistribution of desks will accomplish? Individual A was sitting here, now Individual A will be sitting there. People will still hate the robots. That won't change. This is no different that the ISG's Population Relocation Plan, which tore families apart and prompted millions of suicides. Unless that was the plan. <br><br>By the way, (text-style:"fade-in-out")[How are you feeling?"]
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[FANTABULOUS|nothingHappens]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[CONFUSED|bathroom]]</span></div></span></span><span class="hiddenText3">"But to leave the office configuration unchanged will send the message that intolerance toward robots is allowed. Something needs to be done. Also, you might want to keep your opinion to yourself. Dr. Preston is not fond of counter-arguments. <br><br>By the way, (text-style:"fade-in-out")[How are you feeling?"]
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[FANTABULOUS|nothingHappens]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[CONFUSED|bathroom]]</span></div></span>
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}<span class="narrator2"> Aidan shows off the stuff he has on display. He reads each of the labels on...
A) The cardboard boxes: (click:"The cardboard boxes")[Trivial Pursuit, Connect Four, Game of Life, and Monopoly.]
B) The tower of cartridges: (click:"The tower of cartridges")[Defender, Q-Berg, Zaxxon, Space Shuttle: A Journey Into Space, BurgerTime, Centipede, Pitfall, Galaga, Donkey Kong.]
C) The colorful jukebox titled, 'BEST MUSIC EVER!': (click: "The colorful jukebox titled, 'BEST MUSIC EVER!'")[<br>"Take on Me" by a-ha. <br>"Where The Streets Have No Name" by U2.<br>"Forever Young" by Alphaville. <br>"Mother" by Pink Floyd. <br>"Owner of the Lonely Hearts" by YES.<br>"Wake Me Up Before You Go Go" by Wham!.<br>"I Need You Tonight" by Piste®.
The jukebox has over 3,000 songs and it seems like Aidan is determined to read all of them. "Like a Virgin" by Madonna, "Thriller" by Micheal Jackson, "Runaway" by Bon Jovi, "Here I Go Again" by Whitesnake.
Aidan keeps going, but something begins to feel wrong.]
Next thing you know, you have spent the past twenty minutes in the toilet. Outside the stall, you hear giggles and feet shuffling in a corner. Some shush each other. You recognize both, male and female voices.
"Courtesy flush!" someone yells.
A roll of paper later, you find the energy to pull your pants up, and exit the stall.
But the bathroom is empty.
You check your pockets. Wallet, ID card, Building Pass, it's all there. Your hands are shaking. You feel like you just completed a <span class="popupLink washHands">marathon</span>.
<span class="centerLinks">There's a note on the mirror</span>
<div class="heading">JUDGE'S SCORING CARD:</div><div class="scoring">Korea: 6.5
Russia: 5.5
USA: 5.8
Colombia: 5.9
Denmark: 6.3
</div>
Aidan waits for you outside.</span>
Are you sure you don't want a drink? It will make you feel better.
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[OK. BUT JUST ONE DRINK|bar]]</span></div>
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</div>}"You are felling fine? That's weird. Give me a minute."
<span class="narrator2">Aidan leaves the office, which looks more like a museum: movie posters, logo stickers from Transnational corporations (Ford, Coca-Cola, Nike...) that went bankrupt after the Google Wars, <span class="football popupLink">football equipment</span>, a collection of handheld phones.
You don't know what to make out of all the stuff on display.
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B) The tower of cartridges: (click:"The tower of cartridges")[Defender, Q-Berg, Zaxxon, Space Shuttle: A Journey Into Space, BurgerTime, Centipede, Pitfall, Galaga, Donkey Kong.]
C) The colorful jukebox titled, 'BEST MUSIC EVER!': (click: "The colorful jukebox titled, 'BEST MUSIC EVER!'")[<br>"Take on Me" by a-ha. <br>"Where The Streets Have No Name" by U2.<br>"Forever Young" by Alphaville. <br>"Mother" by Pink Floyd. <br>"Owner of the Lonely Hearts" by YES.<br>"Wake Me Up Before You Go Go" by Wham!.<br>"I Need You Tonight" by INXS.
Aidan returns, and mistakes your curiosity for interest. The jukebox has over 3,000 songs and he reads one by one to you. "Like a Virgin" by Madonna, "Thriller" by Micheal Jackson, "Runaway" by Bon Jovi, "Here I Go Again" by Whitesnake...]</span>
"Are you sure you don't want a drink?" He asks.
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}<span class="narrator2">You have one drink, which turns into two drinks and a conversation about Aidan's family life. He claims to feel like a machine whose sole purpose is to make money so that his wife and daughter can intensify their bond while they push him away, like a satellite floating out of orbit, he says. He talks about gaining weight even though he hates the food, and about feeling disconnected. Like many other employees at H & H, he wishes to visit the 195th floor someday and try the rabbit dish, which is legendary. He's never had rabbit, he says.</span>
"Is this all there is in store for me?" <span class="narrator2">He asks. Then he speaks of his wife's desire to have another baby.</span> "You know how it is with an only child. They grow up to be narcissistic sociopaths. You have to have <span class="popupLink twoKids">at least two</span>." <span class="narrator2">he says.</span>
<span class="narrator2">You and Aidan toast at every sip and exchange a vow of loyalty and friendship.</span>
"This Piste® is good for you. Have more. Don't you feel stronger and smarter already?" <span class="narrator2">Aidan says.</span>
<span class="narrator2">A few drinks later, Aidan starts crying.</span> "Is it wrong to hate my own family? I made one bad choice and now my life is over. I want out!" <span class="narrator2">He asks with his pants down to his ankles, as he pees in a replica of Marcel Duchamp's "Fountain," which is not connected to the sewer.
Aidan serves himself a full glass of Piste®, drinks it, then he rambles about</span>(click-append:"then he rambles about")[(css:"color:#307070")[:<br>"My problems must seem absurd to a robot, unless the robot is programmed to replicate the brew that the human brain concocts to produce feelings like regret, anxiety, and industriousness, and uses them to motivate itself —the brain persuading the brain— to move from place A to place B to place C and do something. Why does my brain want me to keep going? Why must I move from A to B to C if those places are all located on the same Earth, which orbits around the sun over and over again? We're not going anywhere, are we?"]]
<span class="narrator2">In the meantime, the alcohol depresses your nervous system, which slows down the communication between your brain cells. As the alcohol lowers your inhibitions, you say things that are not true.</span> "Nobody can motherfucking touch me!" <span class="narrator2">You scream. Aidan pokes you in the ribs.</span> "I'm touching you," <span class="narrator2">he says.</span>
<span class="narrator2">Your prefrontal cortex dulls, leading to impulsive behavior and poor judgment. That's when you call Aidan's wife, whom you've never met, and attempt to broker a deal where she stops pressuring Aidan.</span> "He's a great man! Stop pressuring him. About what, you ask? You're asking about what? Is that what you're asking? Just in general!" <span class="narrator2">You tell her.</span>
<span class="narrator2">Your cerebellum is also impacted, so you begin to lose your balance. You feel dizzy and your liver stiffens. Your memories fade. The stories you tell Aidan about your childhood are incomplete, so you exaggerate them to make up for the pieces you have forgotten. But you forget how you started this conversation and can't connect it to five mintues ago. Your face puffs up. Your eyes go red and your heart begins to work at an irregular pace.
The alcohol increases your endotoxin levels, causing gut damage, thus allowing bacteria to escape from your gut into your blood stream. This throws your body for a loop.
The machine responsible for your system and operations is aware of the misery and failure to come, yet it is your brain that which sends you the message: You are having a good time. Keep going.</span>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[A Few Hours Later...|Main Floor]]</span></div>
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<span class="main">|typed-speed0>[Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
It's us!
It looks like you've made an everlasting friendship with Dr. Preston and Aidan's team. Congratulations!
However, you seem a bit tied down. Don't worry. All you need to do is find the member of Aidan's team with whom you share the most in common. If you ask the wrong guy, he might rat you out to Dr. Preston, who likes to open people up while they are awake, take out their organs, and make soup with them.
And we don't want that, do we?]</span><span class="insertKnock hiddenText">Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
It's us!
It looks like you've made an everlasting friendship with Dr. Preston and Aidan's team. Congratulations!
However, you seem a bit tied down. Don't worry. All you need to do is find the member of Aidan's team with whom you share the most in common. If you ask the wrong guy, he might rat you out to Dr. Preston, who likes to open people up while they are awake, take out their organs, and make soup with them.
And we don't want that, do we?</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="button7 buttonC">[[I'LL TAKE THE TEST, PLEASE|Personality Test]]</span></div>
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</style>}|typed-speed0>[I apologize for interrupting your love affair with Aidan, but his job is to give you the runaround. He's just a corporate lackey.
Read Aidan's personality recalibration files, so you can get a better idea of how H&H operates.]
<span class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[Read Report|ReportAidan]] [[Not interested|Main Floor]]</span></span></span>
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</style>}<span class="narrator2">You follow Aidan through a series of hallways until you get to the main floor. The central workspace is composed of little more than two hundred desks, and next to each desk there's a bed and a plant. The beds are engineered to recharge the body 40% faster, so a 15 minute power nap can go a long way. And the plants are there for effect. There's plenty of natural light, which shines on the white decor. It looks like a space shuttle set from those old shows that tried to conceptualize the future.
On the North wall there's a ScreenAura® displaying a floating image with the company's <span class="CLogo popupLink">logo</span>.
You are at the bottom of a spiral of floors, each floor coiling up around the atrium, which disappears into a little dark spot.
At any given point, dozens of people lean on the banisters of every floor and observe, take notes, converse, whisper. As soon as you walk in, several people on the second floor point at you. Two women on the third floor laugh. The one on the right wears a yellow jumpsuit with black stripes coming down on both sides. She wears a waterpolo-looking cap. You recognize <span class="CLogo popupLink">the emblem on her chest</span>:</span>
Before you hand in your report to Dr. Preston, <span class="narrator2">Aidan says</span>, remember we drank together, we peed together, we pranked together. You know my wife. You’ve seen pictures of my child, and you said to me, "What a cute baby! You called me ‘a lucky man.’" <span class="positive popupLinkPink">[[We are friends|Notes on Aidan]]</span>, so please don't mention that little thing I said about hating my kids and my wife, okay? You can still tell the truth. Say that I'm not indifferent to them like most humans are. I have feelings about my family, they're just not feelings of tenderness. Say that apathy is the real enemy.
<span class="narrator2"> You move past the desks to a second level, an <span class="popupLink stage">open stage-like platform</span> that oversees the main floor.
<span class="centerAll">Aidan powers up the screen:</span></span>
<div class="centerAll button5"><span class="centerAll">[[REPORT ON MITCH|Aidan Email]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>
to: Dr. Preston (dr_preston@hiremyhirschl.com)
from: Aidan Stoke (aidan_stoke@hiremyhirschl.com)
Subject: What to do with Mitch Cahill.
Mitch hates Charlie because, in his worldview, humans have more value than any other thing, alive or not. He believes that procreation is the goal of mankind, thus to be manufactured is to be devoid of life, regardless if Charlie looks and acts as if he were 100% alive.
Mitch assimilated this and other principles through mainstream ideology. When asked, Why do you believe that every person has a destiny? He replies with a reasonable answer: <span class="lifeMatters popupLink">"Because we all have a purpose; every life matters</span>."
Mitch cannot tolerate Charlie's unabashed and unexplained happiness because, to him, it wasn't earned. It was programmed. This is an insult to all humans who spend their lives working on lining up the right conditions to experience joy for a few moments.
Mitch believes Charlie's happiness is a way for the ISG and H&H to rub it on people's faces how much better they are at creating life (he calls it "faking life".)
Mitch belongs to the human camp, so the angrier he gets, the harder he works and the more he produces. It's a win-win for us.
Mitch is content to preserve the status quo, even if scorn fuels it: he is happy being angry. If we were to reconfigure his temperament, Mitch would be a different kind of human, to the extent that we might as well rename him "Charlie".
After investigating the allegations of robot abuse and robot discrimination, my recommendation is to avoid discontinuation and proceed with the program until all androids enter the mainstream.
My best,
Aidan Stoke
Team Leader
Hiremy & Hirschl
<hr>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[Bottom Line|cancer]]</span></div>
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If Charlie is to survive, he must stand up for himself.
That's always been the lesson: <span class="popupLink askHim">the weak perish</span>."
<div class="centerAll"><span class="cancer hidden button7">[[Ask Aidan about his cancer|cancerDialogue]]</span></div>
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Hey, I'm glad you're back. You slipped and knocked your head on the floor. Do you remember?
I'm Dr. Ashley Preston, and I'm in charge of supervising Hiremy & Hirschl's leadership program. Aidan is one of our most valued team leaders, and I want to apologize on his behalf. He feels terrible. Witnesses claim he rushed to your aide after you slipped, but he was unable to prevent your fall. He's under a lot of stress, he said. Issues with his family. He said you would understand.<br><br>I'm glad you are looking fine. I have to run because we are about to launch our new line of <span class="spicy popupLink">Spicy Squirrel protein bars</span>. However, I do have time for one question.
<div class="centerAll question1 button5 a1"><span class="a1">Why am I tied down?</span></div><span class="hiddenText4"><br>It's quite common to feel disoriented after banging one's head, so we restrained you temporarily to give you stability.<br><br>But let me introduce you to Aidan's team. This is Andrew, Leo, Manu, and you already know Mitch. Why isn't Charlie present?<br><br>Anyway, these guys saw you bang your head and they're worried about you. This is Lisa... sorry, this is Lana. She's new. She's here to take notes. She's quite good at it. <span class="popupLink notesX">Just look at her notes.</span><br><br>Any of these guys can tell you that Aidan is a great guy. He's a little league football coach; he volunteers at feeding zones and helps with hamster collection during the weekends.<br><br>If my information is correct, you called him a robot, and while I wouldn't mind... I like robots... In fact, we all like robots here at Hiremy & Hirschl... you know, some people find the connection insulting. Anyway, it's been good to meet you.<br><br><br><div class="centerAll"><span class='button5'>[[Untie Me|A Way Out]]</span></div></span>
<div class="centerAll question2 button5 a2"><span class="a2">Who are these people?</span></div><span class="hiddenText"><br>Who? Oh, these guys. Well, they are part of Aidan's team. This is Andrew, Leo, Manu, and you already know Mitch. Why isn't Charlie present?<br><br>Anyway, these guys saw you bang your head and they're worried about you. This is Lisa... sorry, this is Lana. She's new. She's here to take notes. She's quite good at it. <span class="popupLink notesX">Just look at her notes.</span><br><br>Any of these guys can attest to Aidan's character. They'll tell you that Aidan is a little league football coach; he volunteers at feeding zones and helps with hamster collection during the weekends. There's tons to like about Aidan, right guys?<br><br>If my information is correct, you called him a robot, and while I wouldn't mind... I like robots... In fact, we all like robots here at Hiremy & Hirschl... you know, some people find the connection insulting. Anyway, it's been good to meet you.<br><br><br><div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[Untie Me|A Way Out]]</span></div></span>
<div class="centerAll question3 button5 a3"><span class="a3">If I slipped, why do I have a black eye?</span></div><span class="hiddenText3"><br>According to these guys, you hit your face on a desk when you slipped and then you hit your head on the floor. But you look well now, except for the black eye and the blood and your head. Do you have a headache?<br><br>But first, let me introduce you to Aidan's team. This is Andrew, Leo, Manu, and you already know Mitch. Why isn't Charlie present?<br><br>Anyway, these guys saw you bang your head and they're worried about you. And this is Lisa... sorry, this is Lana. She's new. She's here to take notes. She's quite good at it. <span class="popupLink notesX">Just look at her notes.</span><br><br>Any of these guys can tell you that Aidan is a great guy. He's a little league football coach; he volunteers at feeding zones and helps with hamster collection during the weekends.<br><br>If my information is correct, you called him a robot, and while I wouldn't mind... I like robots... In fact, we all like robots here at Hiremy & Hirschl... you know, some people find the connection insulting. Anyway, it's been good to meet you.<br><br><br><div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[Untie me|A Way Out]]</span></div></span>
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</div>}<div class="backgroundLogo">(align:"=><=")[<div class="isgLogo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/ISG-Logo.png" width="200"></div>]</div>
|typed-speed0>[Hello, outstanding individual with limited institutional power! Glad to meet you. Look up and read the heading.]
<span class="reply">The I-S-G. That's who we are. Yeah! Whoo!
We hope you are as excited about our logo as we are. We designed it ourselves. And the colors. Very welcoming. Very modern. Very "je ne sais quoi."</span>
<div class='centerAll reply'><span class="buttonX3">[[◎|Introduction2]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>
<b>Subject: Mitch Cahill<br>Transcript: Session 32</b>
<span class="notes">...when I was twelve, I followed the smell to Garbage Mountains, which were six miles away from my house. At the bottom of a pile of plastics, I found two black kittens. They looked abandoned. That's what I assumed. The kittens were meowing, as kittens do. I dug through the trash until I found a shoebox, and I took the kittens with me. I didn't wait to see if the mother was coming back. I just took them. They became my property.
Back home, I carried the kittens to the backyard, near the shed, and went back inside to look for milk. The kittens were so eager and hungry that they licked the milk desperately, and didn't mind the smell. Meanwhile, I took a step back, placed the gasoline tank behind me, and dropped the match on the kittens.
I don't know why I did it. By this I mean, I didn't grow up to be a serial killer. Full disclosure, though, back when there was wild game to kill, I used to hunt. But everybody I knew hunted, too, and none of them, as far as I know, set a couple of kittens on fire.
I didn't kill animals for pleasure. The animals I killed, I ate. What I want to say is, I feel bad about those kittens. Terrible. I remember the kittens coiling and convulsing, their skin crackling; it was awful. However long it lasted, they experienced an unquantifiable amount of pain. Why did I put them through such horror?
And what does it mean? If I had let them live, they would have gone exctinct just like the rest of the cats. What I'm trying to say is, the life I cut short was short anyways. And meaningless. It had no value. Nobody was waiting for those cats to save the world's problems. Right?
Whenever I get hit by that memory, I make amends by saying something nice. If I'm at work, I say, Hey, you have soft skin. High five! Let's work as a team. You are so authentic! They don't know why I compliment them, but it doesn't matter because they receive a jolt of positive energy.
Of course I don't compliment robots.
Some other times, my brain helps me out by feeding me positive ideas. I reason: Those kittens didn't stand a chance. Somebody was going to find and eat them anyway. I mean, sure, there are more humane ways of killing kittens, I agree, but other than that, lesson learned.
Then the guilt fades. It's not like I killed a person, plus the fact I still feel bad about those kittens means I'm a good person.
Always finding the <span class="positive">[[positive side|Positive]]</span>. That's the way I am."
<hr>
<div class='centerAll'><span class="bottomLink3">[[End of Part I|hello intermission]]</span></div>
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</style>}"You need something for your head. I bet you have a headache. Don't you have a headache? I bet you do, yes." <span class="narrator2">says Dr. Preston as he leaves the room.
Mitch, Manu, Andrew, and Leo surround your bed and say nothing. Lana takes notes.</span>
<div class="centerAll button5 question1 a1"><span class="a1">Ask them to release you.</span></div><span class="hiddenText"><br><span class="narrator2">Before you ask them, an alarm goes off and they all leave the room. Lana is the last to exit. <span class="note2 popupLink">She passes a note to you</span>.<br><br>A few moments later the alarm shuts down. The lights switch off by themselves and a screen comes on. At first it shows white noise, but then it goes black. There's a knocking sound coming from the speakers. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. </span><br><br><br><div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[Who's there?|knock knock]]</span></div></span>
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<div class="centerAll div1"><span class="flash">The following test will be used to measure the level of affinity you share with Mitch, Manu, Andrew and Leo.<br><br>After we process your answers, we will match you up with the individual that will most likely untie you.</span>
<span class="continue buttonX1">◎</span></div><div class="centerAll div2"><span class="flash2 hiddenText2">DISCLAIMER: This personality test was created hundreds if not thousands of years ago by an ancient civilization. Since then, most generations have used it to answer the question: Why are we the way we are, and can it be avoided?</span>
<div class="c2 hiddenText"><span class="continue2 buttonX1">◎</span></div></div><div class="centerAll div3"><span class="flash3 hiddenText3">Throughout the decades, the test has been rewritten, translated, and modernized to fit the needs of each era, and although it now doesn’t look anything like the original, we still credit it as the faithful work of its makers, and as such, we consider it sacred.</span>
<div class="c3 hiddenText2"><span class="continue3 buttonX1">◎</span></div></div><div class="centerAll div4">
<span class="flash4 hiddenText4">[[BEGIN LIFE-DEFINING TEST|Question 1]]</span></div>
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If you were having sex with the person of your dreams, and an animal was in the bedroom watching you, which animal would it be?
<input type="radio" name="animalSex" id="gorilla" value="gorilla" checked="checked" /> A Baboon.
<input type="radio" name="animalSex" id="crocodile" value="crocodile" /> A Crocodile.
<input type="radio" name="animalSex" id="cobra" value="cobra" /> A Cobra.
<input type="radio" name="animalSex" id="goldFish" value="goldFish" /> <span class="goldFish1">A Salmon.</span>
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 2]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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QUESTION 2
How would you rather make a living?
<input type="radio" name="living" id="politician" value="politician" checked="checked" /> As a politician who amasses riches at the expense of millions of people (most of whom voted for you.)
<input type="radio" name="living" id="middleClass" value="middleClass" /> 14 hour shift, 5-7 days a week, monotonous job, in exchange for lower-middle-class status for your family, and a great excuse for not being around.
<input type="radio" name="living" id="scientist" value="scientist" /> As a bio-medical scientist in charge of engineering viruses that will reduce the human population by millions.
<input type="radio" name="living" id="football" value="football" /> <span class="athlete">An extremely popular singer.</span>
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 3]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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Which ethnic group would you exterminate to make more room on Earth?
<input type="radio" name="exterminate" value="Han" checked="checked" /> Han Chinese.
<input type="radio" name="exterminate" value="Hindu" /> Hindustanis
<input type="radio" name="exterminate" value="Russians" /> Russians
<input type="radio" name="exterminate" id="arabs" value="Arabs" /> <span class="arabs1">I would not get involved. All human life deserves respect.</span>
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 4]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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You turn the corner and discover a police officer clubbing a stranger. You don't know what prompted such violence. Ten people blithely spectate. The victim is unconscious. Would you stop the policeman, even if that means you must attack him?
<input type="radio" name="policeBrutal" value="walk" checked="checked" /> I'd stay out of trouble and keep walking.
<input type="radio" name="policeBrutal" id="risk" value="risk" /> <span class="risk1"> I'd defend the victim, risk my freedom and my life, and attack the police officer if necessary.</span>
<input type="radio" name="policeBrutal" value="walk" /> I'd persuade the witnesses to gang up against the policeman, and then I'd kick the police officer when he's on the floor.
<input type="radio" name="policeBrutal" value="walk" /> I'd steal the police officer's car while he's beating the victim with his club.
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 5]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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If you found conclusive evidence of an afterlife, would you kill yourself now?
<input type="radio" name="afterlife" value="yes" checked="checked" /> Yay, here we come, afterlife!
<input type="radio" name="afterlife" value="kill" /> No, but I'd kill a lot of people I don't like and hope I don't bump into them later.
<input type="radio" name="afterlife" id="old" value="old" /> <span class="old1">I'd wait until I'm older.</span>
<input type="radio" name="afterlife" value="business" /> I'd start a business organizing suicide parties.
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 6]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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Noting a few exceptions, at which age do you think humans become physically and mentally worthless, i.e., unable to contribute to the progress of humankind?
<input type="radio" name="age" value="55" checked="checked" /> 55
<input type="radio" name="age" value="60" /> 60
<input type="radio" name="age" value="65" /> 65
<input type="radio" name="age" id="seventy" value="setenta" /> <span class="seventy1">70</span>
<span class="button5 submit">[[SUBMIT|Question 7]]</span> <span class="button5">[[QUIT TEST|Quit Test]]</span>
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If humankind had a purpose, which would it be?
<input type="radio" name="age" value="reproduce" checked="checked" /> To reproduce so that all the creatures on Earth can enjoy more of this concept called Me®.
<input type="radio" name="age" value="achievements" /> To earn high renown through notable achievements, so that after I die, the living can enter buildings and travel on roads named after Me®.
<input type="radio" name="age" value="mysteries" /> To solve all the mysteries of the universe so that, finally, we can... I don't know, laugh about it in the void of darkness?
<input type="radio" name="age" id="suffering" value="suffering" /> <span class="suffering1"> To endure suffering and behave kindly so that after we die, we can be sent to a place of eternal happiness.</span>
<span class="button5 submit">[[FINAL RESULTS|Results]]</span>
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<div class="centerAll"><span id="flash">Thank you for taking the test, which our ancestors originally named:<br><br>"RELAX, LIFE CAN GET MUCH WORSE."</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="names">The results coming up after these...</span>
<span class="results">[[Messages|Messages]]</span>
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<div class="container"><div class="lobbyBoxes one"><span class="boxSpan">Get in the Car</span></div><span class="car hidden">My mother told me, "Get in the car. I'm taking you to Disney World." She sped through a road flanked by dry, ashy trees. I remember Cheetos, Doritos, Chips Ahoy, and blowing the red lights when passing through the many dying American towns.
Two hundred miles later: Lake Buena Vista. After we got in, we stood in line for 45 minutes, endured the hard sun, the sudden torrential rain, all to ride a canoe through a cardboard landscape and see dozens of dummies sing a horror song about this being a small world after all. As if that was humanity's main point of contention, the size of the planet.<br><br><hr></span>
<div class="lobbyBoxes two"><span class="boxSpan">Parade</span></div><span class="favorite hidden"><br><br>"This was my favorite ride when I was a kid," my mom said. "Or was it the space ride?" When we got to the tea cups, she said the tea cups were her favorite ride when she was a kid. She couldn't remember if she was eight or twelve when she first visited Disney World. "Isn't this exciting?" she said as we waited in line.<br><br><hr></span>
<div class="lobbyBoxes three"><span class="boxSpan">Protocol</span></div><span class="photos hidden"><br><br>I took a photo with a tiger and a donkey. <span class="popupLink Igor">I was wearing Shutter Shades, and my favorite shirt.</span>
When she took photos of us, she hugged me. "Smile pretty," she said. "Come on, smile. Goddamn it. You look like a... Let's take another one." Then she posted them online: "Unforgettable times with my son Ashley!!!!!"<br><br><hr></span>
<div class="lobbyBoxes four"><span class="boxSpan">The Stranger</span></div><span class="parade hidden"><br><br>At midnight we saw the parade. I remember stars, fireworks, and my mom talking to a fat stranger about being unemployed, going through hard times, and about the music of Bruce Springfield. The man kept wanting to chime in every time she said "Springfield," but my mom would talk over him, as if the only way to maintain some control was through the act of talking.<br><br><hr></span>
<div class="lobbyBoxes five"><span class="boxSpan">Favorite Ride</span></div><span class="protocol hidden"><br><br>I had no way of knowing this, but my mom's brain was triggering a protocol so powerful, her system went into override mode, then it switched to automatic pilot, and then delete, delete, delete. Her brain took a permanent vacation and kept deleting all her files. The eating algorithm, the defecation protocol, the son recognition software. All gone.<br><br><hr></span>
<div class="lobbyBoxes six"><span class="boxSpan">Photos</span></div><span class="stranger hidden"><br><br>After she became a stranger, I realized that nobody knew me. Disney went under and my mother died beneath a highway underpass, a place thick with traffic, where the cars and the birds and the people still fly by, forming convoluted patterns that rearrange themselves as components recede.
<hr>
</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="hiddenText final">[[Delete This Memory|Memory Reign]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>|typed-speed0>[Test, test, hello?...
^3000 It's working.
^1000 Relax, I just hacked into your Amplif-Eye® because there's something the ISG isn't telling you:]
<span class="next">In a recent study, the ISG found out that 97% of people believe that visualizing the best possible outcome when facing a challenge is vital to surpassing it. Seems fair. It's unlikely you'll climb a mountain if you don't believe you can do it.
However, given that in every activity many factors are out of the individual's control, optimism is mistaken for a force that extends beyond the mind and has the power to mold reality to one's desires. That's problematic.
One thing is to control your fears through a struggle, and another one is to think storms can wither as a consequence of your belief.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[◎|Positive2]]</span> <span class="next">[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div>
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(set: $name to "Mitch")<div class="backgroundLogoGreen centerAll"><div class="isgLogoGreen"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/ISG-Logo-GREEN.png" width="150"></div></div>
<div class="centerAll names">Our computers indicate that we are <span class="percentage"></span>% certain your personality matches that of <span class="X"></span>, thus making it easier for you to befriend him.
We suggest that you use that friendship to free yourself.
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<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Call $name|Final Results Part2]]</span></class>
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<div class='main'>|typed-speed0>[Out of 97% of the optimists, 87% believe that everything happens for a reason, while 82% believe all human life is valuable.]
<div class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[◎|Positive3]]</span> <span class="next">[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div><div class='main2 hidden'><br><br>Out of 97% of the optimists, 87% believe that everything happens for a reason, while 82% believe all human life is valuable.
<div class="centerAll"><span class>[[◎|Positive3]]</span> <span class>[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class='main'>|typed-speed0>[So imagine you're on a plane, and the pilot announces that you are heading for a crash. This means that out of the 220 passengers, 213 believe the plane will land safely, 185 think that there's no reason to be afraid, and 174 believe that even if the aircraft crashes, all passengers should survive.
Then the plane heads directly into a skyscraper and you, the rest of the passengers, and 3,000 more people die.]
<div class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[◎|Positive4]]</span> <span class="next">[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div><div class='main2 hidden'>So imagine you're on a plane, and the pilot announces that you are heading for a crash. This means that out of the 220 passengers, 213 believe the plane will land safely, 185 think that there's no reason to be afraid, and 174 believe that even if the aircraft crashes, all passengers should survive.
Then the plane heads directly into a skyscraper and you, the rest of the passengers, and 3,000 more people die.
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[◎|Positive4]]</span> <span>[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class='main'>|typed-speed0>[7.6 billion people watch the events on the news, which means that 7.3 billion of them are grateful they are not you, 6.4 billion believe that your death was for the best, and 5.9 billion think your name must be added to a monument.]
<div class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[◎|Positive5]]</span> <span class="next">[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div><div class='main2 hidden'>7.6 billion people watch the events on the news, which means that 7.3 billion of them are grateful they are not you, 6.4 billion believe that your death was for the best, and 5.9 billion think your name must be added to a monument.
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[◎|Positive5]]</span> <span>[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class='main'>|typed-speed0>[The monument gets built years later along with a brand new skyscraper. Both are constructed on the spot where you died. On average, 12,000 people visit the site daily, which means that every day, 11,640 people are thankful the queue to get in, although long, moves pretty fast; 10,127 are sure that after the tour is over, they will find tickets to that acclaimed Broadway musical everybody wants to see, and 9,544 take a picture of themselves near your name: #NeverForget.]
<div class="centerAll"><span class="next">[[◎|Positive6]]</span> <span class="next">[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div><div class='main2 hidden'>The monument gets built years later along with a brand new skyscraper. Both are constructed on the spot where you died. On average, 12,000 people visit the site daily, which means that every day, 11,640 people are thankful the queue to get in, although long, moves pretty fast; 10,127 are sure that after the tour is over, they will find tickets to that acclaimed Broadway musical everybody wants to see, and 9,544 take a picture of themselves near your name: #NeverForget.
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[◎|Positive6]]</span> <span>[[abort|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div>
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<div class='main'>|typed-speed0>[On the day of your birthday, the groundskeeper places a fresh rose by your name. What do you think that means?]
<div class="centerAll continue"><span class="next">[[Return to Main|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></div>
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<div class="centerAll logo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Bunny-LogoSM.png" width="520"><hr></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">Subject: Aidan Stoke<br>Personality Recalibration Trials</span></div>
<div class="notes"><span class="underline ">Trial #1: Phisol® - 100mg</span>
* Subject feels energized in the mornings.
* Switches from Piste® to Koppa®.
* Brings presents to colleagues on their birthday.
* Becomes affable, but also gullible and naive.
* Lower ranking staff quickly sniffs out weakness and begins to miss assignments and to challenge his authority.
* Subject not only begins to get pranked, but gets pranked hard. [e.g., 300 kg mechanical arm that serves lunch reprogrammed to take swing at subject's genitalia.]
<span class="bold">Results: Bullying rise - 100%</span>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Next trial|trial2]]</span> <span class="notes">[[Skip to Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span></div></div>
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<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Aidan: Yes, the weak shall... wait, who told you anything about my cancer?]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Truth|cancer2Truth]] [[Lie|cancer2Lie]]</span></div>
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[I've been in touch with someone who has information you either don't or refuse to share.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Aidan: Nobody tells each other everything. That doesn't mean we're not on the same side.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[That's not the point. How can you say that Charlie is fundamentally weak given that you have cancer?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Aidan: I didn't give myself cancer on purpose.]</span>
<div class="centerAll timer"><span class='timer'>[[Cruel?|Be Cruel]] [[Kind?|Be Kind]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">I've been in touch with someone who has information you either don't or refuse to share.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Aidan: Nobody tells each other everything. That doesn't mean we're not on the same side.</span>
<span class="Me">That's not the point. How can you say that Charlie is fundamentally weak given that you have cancer?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Aidan: I didn't give myself cancer on purpose.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Cruel?|Be Cruel]] [[Kind?|Be Kind]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[I think you told me when we were drinking.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Aidan: Not true. I remember everything, especially after drinking.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Your healthy alcohol with vitamins?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[My breakfast of champions.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Then how can you say that Charlie is fundamentally weak given that you have cancer?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Aidan: I didn't give myself cancer on purpose.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Cruel?|Be Cruel]] [[Kind?|Be Kind]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">I think you told me when we were drinking.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Aidan: Not true. I remember everything, especially after drinking.</span>
<span class="Me">Your healthy alcohol with vitamins?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">My breakfast of champions.</span>
<span class="Me">Then how can you say that Charlie is fundamentally weak given that you have cancer?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Aidan: I didn't give myself cancer on purpose.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Cruel?|Be Cruel]] [[Kind?|Be Kind]]</span></div></div>
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<div class="notes"><span class="underline">Trial #4: Setrofer®, 50mg + Dilapizomapan®, 600mg</span>
* Subject developed desire to collect vintage memorabilia.
* Thinks memorabilia = history.
* States that remembering the past at a time most of it has been rebranded or forgotten = true wisdom.
* More than 70% of subject's tales of such past = incorrect.
* Subject convinced he's woman trapped in man's body.
<span class="bold">Results: Increase in productivity 15%.</span></div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Next trial|trial3]]</span> <span class="notes">[[Skip to Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span>
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<span class="centerAll">Recalibration Trials for Aidan Stoke</span>
<span class="underline">Summary</span>: We activated the desired combination of emotions in 92% of the trials, and were able to predict with 83% accuracy the actions that followed, surpassing last year's target of 71%.
The subject never suspected any involvement from H&H, and instead attributed his mood swings to work overload and family troubles.
I therefore recommend we proceed to Stage II, but not before revisiting some of the foundational ideas that led H&H to pursue this project:
<ul>
<li>Why is it important that the subject cheers for X or Y football team, that he values X friendship over Y friendship, that he prefers son over daughter, bachelorhood over family life, pesimism over optimism, ignorance over knowledge, gin over rum, i.e., Could we just delete all these personality traits without affecting the subject's productivity?</li>
<li>Is productivity outcome the only attribute that renders the subject valuable?</li>
<li>Could H&H extract additional benefits out of the subject outside of regular working hours?</li>
<li>Are his margins of increased productivity worth the investment?</li>
</ul>Chief Quality Officer,
Dr. Ashley Preston
<hr>
<div class="centerAll">[[Return to Main|Main Floor]]</div>
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<div class="notes"><span class="underline">Trial #8: Sentrofer(ES)® 30mg + Lucydika®, 25mg</span>
* Levels of self-loathing = higher than normal.
* Subject started 4 fist fights, all over disagreements regarding best way to make a martini.
* Apologized to all 4 individuals re. insults to wife & kids + broken nose.
* At night, tries to prove the existence of ghosts with cheap, plastic equipment that occasionally makes screeching noises.
<span class="bold">Results: Increase in productivity 20%.</span></div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Next trial|trial4]]</span> <span class="notes">[[Skip to Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span></div>
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<span class="underline">Trial #14: Chlorobicyclette® 100mg</span>
* 8:00 pm - 3:30 am: subject has been sitting down, working. [Me: Why can't we hire intern for lousy part of job?]
* 4:05 - 5:00 am: Watches comedy show. Laughs out loud at commercials. [Me = ???? Nothing funny!]
* 5:05 am: Naps. No brushing of teeth prior or after.
* REM Scan® reveals subject's dream of exploring the universe to discover what "all this shit" is all about. [subject's words in dream]
<span class="bold">Results: Passive existence; steady productivity.</span>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Next trial|trial5]]</span> <span class="notes">[[Skip to Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span></div>
<div class="centerAll logo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Bunny-LogoSM.png" width="520"><hr></div>
<span class="underline">Trial # 19: Mazapotlanica®, 800mg</span>
* While tasting our new Bunny Bars, for once, subject happy!
* Swears bars taste like beef hamburger, even though he's never tried one given that cows = thing of the past.
* Subject equates chewing on Bunny Bars® with pleasure of curling toes in sand at sunny, calm beach in South Canada. [exaggeration = desire to be liked?]
<span class="bold">Results: Weight gain 15%</span>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Next trial|trial6]]</span> <span class="notes">[[Skip to Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span></div><div class="centerAll logo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Bunny-LogoSM.png" width="520"><hr></div>
<span class="underline">Trial #23: Zultox®, 150mg</span>
* Subject finds 0 value in collecting video games he doesn't play, movies he doesn't watch, and books he never reads.
* Expresses desire of taking own life in spree where random passerby also dies.
* Sadness toward people who age to point of complete indignity = high.
* Prone to lie 48% of the time.
* Talks about himself 43% more.
* Subject questions purpose of life -ALL LIFE- not only human. [Maybe 2 much self-importance?]</span>
<span class="bold">Results: Zero Productivity</span>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="notes">[[Final Analysis|Conclusion]]</span></div><div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[I'm not surprised. You're an alcoholic, an absentee father, and an unloving husband. You're a shitty person. I don't even know what's the point of having you around.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed05>[I was just venting. You're the asshole because you're passing judgment on some isolated feeling I was having due to work overload.
On top of that I'm an alcoholic? Where have you been for the past ten years?]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[That's propaganda spun to offset the fact that most of the natural food is gone.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[You're being paranoid. We have plenty of food. Just today we launched our new Skunk Smoothie Mix.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Do you even know what a skunk is?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[All I need to know is that the Skunk Smoothie Mix is Skunky-Yummy!]</span>
<div class="skunkMix button7 centerAll timer0"<span>Check out the new Skunk Smoothie Mix logo!</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Hopeful?|Hopeful]] [[Pessimistic?|Pessimistic]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">I'm not surprised. You're an alcoholic, an absentee father, and an unloving husband. You're a shitty person. I don't even know what's the point of having you around.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">I was just venting. You're the asshole because you're passing judgment on some isolated feeling I was having due to work overload.
On top of that I'm an alcoholic? Where have you been for the past ten years?</span>
<span class="Me">That's the market reacting to our food shortage.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">You're being paranoid. We have plenty of food. Just today we launched our new Skunk Smoothie Mix.</span>
<span class="Me">Do you even know what a skunk is?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">All I need to know is that the Skunk Smoothie Mix is Skunky-Yummy!</span>
<div class="skunkMix button7 centerAll"<span>Check out the new Skunk Smoothie Mix logo!</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Hopeful?|Hopeful]] [[Pessimistic?|Pessimistic]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[I'm very sorry you have cancer. Is there anything I can do to help?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Have a drink with me. Here. Drink up.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Perhaps drinking has contributed to your health issues?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Where have you been for the past ten years? You're sounding like a robot.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[What if it's all propaganda spun to offset the fact most of the natural food is gone?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[We have plenty of food. Just today we launched our new Shrimp Shake.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Do you even know what shrimp are?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[All I need to know is that the Shrimp Shake is totally T-T-T-Tasty!]</span>
<div class="shrimpShake button7 centerAll timer0"<span>Check out the new Shrimp Shake! logo</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Hopeful?|Hopeful]] [[Pessimistic?|Pessimistic]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">I'm very sorry you have cancer. Is there anything I can do to help?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Have a drink with me. Here. Drink up.</span>
<span class="Me">Perhaps drinking has contributed to your health issues?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Where have you been for the past ten years? You're sounding like a robot.</span>
<span class="Me">What if it's the market reacting to our food shortage?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">We have plenty of food. Just today we launched our new Shrimp Shake.</span>
<span class="Me">Do you even know what shrimp are?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">All I need to know is that the Shrimp Shake is totally T-T-T-Tasty!</span>
<div class="shrimpShake button7 centerAll"<span>Check out the new Shrimp Shake! logo</span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Hopeful?|Hopeful]] [[Pessimistic?|Pessimistic]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Reboot your system? You mean, like a robot?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Careful there. I'm just getting my liver replaced. It's a thing now.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[A thing? That's a huge change to your body.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[I thought so, too, but some people get their lungs done, others their eyes done. I'm getting my liver done.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Explore the idea|Explore the Idea]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">Reboot your system? You mean, like a robot?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Careful there. I'm just getting my liver replaced. It's a thing now.</span>
<span class="Me">A thing? That's a huge change to your body.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">I thought so, too, but some people get their lungs done, others their eyes done. I'm getting my liver done.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Explore the idea|Explore the Idea]]</span></div></div>
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<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Faith? Positive? And then what, I get to live forever? What are you talking about? I'm going to have a drink. Do you want one? You should have one. Here. Come on. Drink.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[You don't seem very scared.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[I was very afraid at first. I even told the doctor: 'I'm ready for the next life.' But I was lying. I got all philosophical, which is something I'm not. What is the purpose of life? Ugh, who cares?
But knowing I had cancer made me think differently. I asked the Doctor: I can't believe that we briefly exist in this universe in order to move on to another universe after death. Why can't we live forever on this one?
He said he didn't know. Then I asked him, Doctor, how much of me would move on? I can't remember the shit I did when I was eleven years old.
He said he didn't know. Then I told him, Doctor, I'm not even the same person I was twenty years ago. There must be at least ten versions of me. Who is moving on to the next life?
He stared at me, impatiently. He interrupted me, Are you finished? I nodded, so then he told me that I qualify for a new liver. He said he'll reboot my system next week and install the liver.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Reboot Your System?|Reboot]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">Listen, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. Everything will turn out fine. You just need to have faith, stay positive.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Faith? Positive? And then what, I get to live forever? What are you talking about? I'm going to have a drink. Do you want one? You should have one. Here. Come on. Drink.</span>
<span class="Me">You don't seem very scared.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">I was very afraid at first. I even told the doctor: 'I'm ready for the next life.' But I was lying. I got all philosophical, which is something I'm not. What is the purpose of life? Ugh, who cares?
But knowing I had cancer made me think differently. I asked the Doctor: I can't believe that we briefly exist in this universe in order to move on to another universe after death. Why can't we live forever on this one?
He said he didn't know. Then I asked him, Doctor, how much of me would move on? I can't remember the shit I did when I was eleven years old.
He said he didn't know. Then I told him, Doctor, I'm not even the same person I was twenty years ago. There must be at least ten versions of me. Who is moving on to the next life?
He stared at me, impatiently. He interrupted me, Are you finished? I nodded, so then he told me that I qualify for a new liver. He said he'll reboot my system next week and install the liver.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Reboot Your System?|Reboot]]</span></div></div>
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<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[We're all dying real soon, regardless.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[So what are you going to do? Will you live in pain for the rest of your days, or are you going to kill yourself?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Neither. At first I was very scared.
I even got all philosophical, which is something I'm not. What is the purpose of life? Ugh, who cares?
Then I'm asking the doctor: I can't believe that we briefly exist in this universe in order to move on to another universe after death. Why can't we live forever on this one?
He said he didn't know. Then I asked him, Doctor, how much of me would move on? I can't remember the shit I did when I was eleven years old?
He said he didn't know. Then I told him, Doctor, I'm not even the same person I was twenty years ago. There must be at least ten versions of me. Who is moving on to the next life?
He stared at me, impatiently. He interrupted me, Are you finished? I nodded. Then he told me that he has plenty of livers in storage, and that he'll reboot my system next week and install the new liver.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Reboot Your System?|Reboot]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">We all know we're dying, but it's a whole different ballgame when you learn it'll happen REAL SOON.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">We're all dying real soon, regardless.</span>
<span class="Me">So what are you going to do? Will you live in pain for the rest of your days, or are you going to kill yourself?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Neither. At first I was very scared.
I even got all philosophical, which is something I'm not. What is the purpose of life? Ugh, who cares?
Then I'm asking the doctor: I can't believe that we briefly exist in this universe in order to move on to another universe after death. Why can't we live forever on this one?
He said he didn't know. Then I asked him, Doctor, how much of me would move on? I can't remember the shit I did when I was eleven years old?
He said he didn't know. Then I told him, Doctor, I'm not even the same person I was twenty years ago. There must be at least ten versions of me. Who is moving on to the next life?
He stared at me, impatiently. He interrupted me, Are you finished? I nodded. Then he told me that he has plenty of livers in storage, and that he'll reboot my system next week and install the new liver.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Reboot Your System?|Reboot]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[I'm happy for you. I am. But it sounds abnormal, twisted. Are you sure this is safe?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[It's a simple procedure. The doctor says it's in-and-out, that I'll be back at work that same afternoon.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Right now it's a liver, but then it's your arm, your legs, then your brain, your feelings, your character... So how many adjustments can you undergo before you cannot call yourself human anymore?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[I'll still be me.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[But say you begin to laugh at different jokes, or vote for a different political party. Or worse. Say you become unrecognizable, so much so that you don't even identify with humans. What then?]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[By then I won't know the difference. The point is, I'm not dying from liver cancer. Why is that such a problem?]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[Blunt?|Blunt]] [[Supportive?|supportive]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">I'm happy for you. I am. But it sounds abnormal, twisted. Are you sure this is safe?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">It's a simple procedure. The doctor says it's in-and-out, that I'll be back at work that same afternoon.</span>
<span class="Me">Right now it's a liver, but then it's your arm, your legs, then your brain, your feelings, your character... So how many adjustments can you undergo before you cannot call yourself human anymore?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">I'll still be me.</span>
<span class="Me">But say you begin to laugh at different jokes, or vote for a different political party. Or worse. Say you become unrecognizable, so much so that you don't even identify with humans. What then?</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">By then I won't know the difference. The point is, I'm not dying from liver cancer. Why is that such a problem?</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[Blunt?|Blunt]] [[Supportive?|supportive]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}Once again, my apologies. I've been working long hours. Family issues. Life. You understand. Anyway...
I thank you for evaluating this complicated situation. This thing with Mitch and Charlie... it doesn't look good.
In any case, it's a huge relief you are here. The team is overjoyed. And concerned, of course.
Me? I'm feeling supersonic. I didn't do anything wrong. I'm worried about Mitch, though. He might not be a model member of the H&H family, but he's a positive person and a hard worker. Very personable. Loyal. A team player. Has a family. Kids. Or is it one kid?
Anyway, his father was replaced by a robot that brings Shrimp Shakes® and Skunk Smoothies® to work every morning and can execute 200 million instructions in a second. How is that fair?
And then there's Charlie. The Robot Act? Come on. You have to expect some friction. If the law states that robots should be treated as people, I treat them as people. But you can see how real, common folk might feel undervalued, right?
Do you want cinammon tea... with a little <span class="vodka popupLink">Piste®</span> perhaps?"
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3">[[YES Piste®|yesTea]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[TEA ONLY|noAlcohol]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[NOTHING|noTea]]</span></div></div>
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</div>}<div class="container"><span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[It is a problem. Right now it's a liver, but later you make yourself stronger, better looking. Then you adjust your brain and you make yourself smarter, happier.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Great then!]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[But you can assume the same upgrades will be done by everyone else who can afford the procedure.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Good for them!]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[And the rest, even though they might have been born genetically sound, will be automatically devalued.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[That's the way it's always been.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[But imagine this is your kid and you upgrade him. You can assume other fathers will do the same, so the competition will force you to change your kid so much, he'll be nothing like you and everything like the technology he uses.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[That's not true. He'll always be my son.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[By then he'll be made of chips and motherboards, and will contradict your ancestry. He'll be a robot, and you'll be some outdated thing he detests.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[One Final Touch|punch]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">It is a problem. Right now it's a liver, but later you make yourself stronger, better looking. Then you adjust your brain and you make yourself smarter, happier.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Great then!</span>
<span class="Me">But you can assume the same upgrades will be done by everyone else who can afford the procedure.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Good for them!</span>
<span class="Me">And the rest, even though they might have been born genetically sound, will be automatically devalued.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">That's the way it's always been.</span>
<span class="Me">But imagine this is your kid and you upgrade him. You can assume other fathers will do the same, so the competition will force you to change your kid so much, he'll be nothing like you and everything like the technology he uses.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">That's not true. He'll always be my son.</span>
<span class="Me">By then he'll be made of chips and motherboards, and will contradict your ancestry. He'll be a robot, and you'll be some outdated thing he detests.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[One Final Touch|punch]]</span></div></div>
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<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Thank you! That makes me feel better.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Soon, we'll be able to adjust our looks and become beautiful.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Yeah! I'd always wanted bigger calves.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[And we'll tweak our brains to be smarter, happier.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[We're not that far away. A year, maybe two.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[And only the ones who can afford it will get upgraded.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[It's evolution, baby!]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[More like elitism, but hey, in a hundred years no one will care.]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[What's done is done.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[Your kids will benefit from it. They'll upgrade to compete with the other kids who can also afford to upgrade.]
</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[May the best man win.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[And the competition will be so fierce, it will force your kid to become nothing like you, and everything like the technology he uses!]</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">|typed-speed0>[Wait, what? That's not true. He'll always be my son.]</span>
<span class="Me">|typed-speed0>[One day your son will be made out of chips and motherboards, and his generic coding will contradict yours. He'll be a robot, and you'll be some old-fashioned thing he detests.]</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[One Final Touch|punch]]</span></div></div><div class="container2 hidden"><span class="Me">That's awesome. Centuries ago they'd cut your leg off and pray the infection didn't kill you. Now you're getting a new liver!</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Thank you! That makes me feel better.</span>
<span class="Me">Soon, we'll be able to adjust our looks and become beautiful.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Yeah! I'd always wanted bigger calves.</span>
<span class="Me">And we'll tweak our brains to be smarter, happier.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">We're not that far away. A year, maybe two.</span>
<span class="Me">And only the ones who can afford it will get upgraded.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">It's evolution, baby!</span>
<span class="Me">More like elitism, but hey, in a hundred years no one will care.</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">What's done is done.</span>
<span class="Me">Your kids will benefit from it. They'll upgrade to compete with the other kids who can also afford to upgrade.
</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">May the best man win.</span>
<span class="Me">And the competition will be so fierce, it will force your kid to become nothing like you, and everything like the technology he uses!</span>
<span class="AidanDialogue">Wait, what? That's not true. He'll always be my son.</span>
<span class="Me">One day your son will be made out of chips and motherboards, and his generic coding will contradict yours. He'll be a robot, and you'll be some old-fashioned thing he detests.</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span>[[One Final Touch|punch]]</span></div></div>
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</style>}<div class="centerAll">And perhaps because he's been under a lot of pressure at work...
Or maybe as a consequence of family problems...
Or maybe on account of a vitamin overload from all that healthy alcohol...
But most surely because that's the way he is, meaning that's his personality...
Aidan behaves quite humanly and throws a punch toward your face.
Your reflexes, as expected, are human-like. No cyber-upgrades there, so you don't have much of a choice but to close your eyes and emit a soft and tender...
<div class="centerAll"><span class="timer">[[MEOW!|decision]]</span></div></div>
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We asked ourselves, Can this human (you) judge this fundamental quandary between humans (Mitch) and robots (Charlie) objectively? And the answer was an unequivocal, marquee-styled, huge "NO."
We can't trust you, but not because you lack character. Quite the contrary. You just happen to be too self-oriented. That's the way you are programmed. Take Mitch, for example. He has the sort of brain that processes reality as a compartmentalized experience. Because his brain cannot connect to all other brains in existence and give rise to one incontrovertible truth, it is only capable of churning approximations, which must be negotiated through language.
This means that each assessment is polluted by his value system.
<div class="fade centerAll"><span>Do you agree?</span></div>
<div class="centerAll fade"><span class="bottomLink3 reply">[[Yes|agree]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[No|Disagree]]</span> <span class="bottomLink3">[[In Part|InPart]]</span></div>
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Great. We made a connection. I said something, and the neurons in your brain produced fireworks. Triple-Wowzer!
However... and this is a big HOWEVER, by agreeing to the question you disqualified your answer. You said 'yes' to your subjective and limited brainpower, which in turn makes you unreliable. It's not your fault. That's the way your brain works!
So why are we here?
Well, we see potential, opportunity, growth. That's our job. Our studies show that a few humans have evolved into more capable beings, and you might be one of them, i.e., you might be Elite®. Ka-ching!
Before you celebrate, though, a warning: If you feel compelled to side with Mitch because you're both human, don't. By stubbornly protecting the status quo, you will enable further damage to all life on Earth.
On the other hand, overcompensation is not encouraged either. Our robots can detect hypocrisy.
Is all this confusing? Don't worry. Leave the tests to us. Remember that you might be Elite®, which makes you the weird kid the teacher wants to fail because she has no way of recognizing your gifts.
In the meantime, here's some additional information about Mitch. These are notes we 'borrowed' from Hiremy & Hirschl's archives.
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3 size">[[NOTES ON MITCH|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div>
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We are not suprised. We say, 'People cannot escape subjectivity', and here comes you to prove us right. It's not your fault. That's the way your brain works. Your brain tells you that your opinions are admirable, so you share your thoughts. Then another human receives your thoughts, disagrees, and starts a squabble. The third person opposes you and the second guy in some oblique way, the fourth challenges the semantics, and so on.
Finally, the initial question gets tossed to the wayside.
So why are we still chatting with you?
Well, we see potential, opportunity, growth. That's our job. Our studies show that a few humans have evolved into more capable beings, and you might be one of them, i.e., you might be Elite®. Ka-ching!
Before you celebrate, though, a warning: If you feel compelled to side with Mitch because you're both human, don't. By stubbornly protecting the status quo, you will enable further damage to all life on Earth.
On the other hand, overcompensation is not encouraged either. Our robots can detect false virtue.
Is all this confusing? Don't worry. Leave the tests to us. Remember that you might be Elite®, which makes you the weird kid the teacher wants to fail because she has no way of recognizing your gifts.
In the meantime, here's some additional information about Mitch. These are notes we 'borrowed' from Hiremy & Hirschl's archives.
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3 size">[[NOTES ON MITCH|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div>
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<div class="centerAll">But which one is it? Do you partly agree or do you partly disagree?</div>
<div class="paragraph2 centerDiv"><span class="reply4 button5">I PARTLY AGREE</span> <span class="reply5 button5">I PARTLY DISAGREE</span></div></span><span class=hiddenText4><div class="centerDiv"><span class="reply4 button5">I PARTLY AGREE</span></div><br>A glass-half-full sort of fellow in this planet full of humans? Wow. Brave.
Okay, we'll give you full marks for the part you agree, and ignore the fact that you're wrong about the rest.
It's all good news from here on out, except for one small caveat: Optimists focus on the positive so much, they eventually gravitate away from the problems that need fixing. Hence, we cannot expect for you to evaluate the Mitch vs Charlie situation objectively. I know you believe you can, but that's because you're an optimist. Us? We see a little mouse standing heroically at the bottom of the mountain, arms stretched, telling everybody, 'I can stop this avalanche' as a boulder crushes you in half an instant.
So why are we still talking to the likes of you?
Well, we see potential, opportunity, growth. That's our job. Our studies show that a few humans have evolved into more capable beings, and you might be one of them, i.e., you might be Elite®. Ka-ching!
Before you celebrate, though, a warning: If you feel compelled to side with Mitch because you're both human, don't. By stubbornly protecting the status quo, you will enable further damage to all life on Earth.
On the other hand, overcompensation is not encouraged either. Our robots can detect false virtue.
Is all this confusing? Don't worry. Leave the tests to us. Remember that you might be Elite®, which makes you the weird kid the teacher wants to fail because she has no way of recognizing your gifts.
In the meantime, here's some additional information about Mitch. These are notes we 'borrowed' from Hiremy & Hirschl's archives.
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3 size">[[NOTES ON MITCH|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></span></span><span class=hiddenText6><div class="centerDiv"><span class="reply5 button5">I PARTLY DISAGREE</span></div><br>Life is not enough for you. Fair enough. Being a contrarian gives you panache. You reject this and you reject that. Somebody says, 'human life has never carried much value.' And you scream, 'I disagree!' We get it. It colors your personality. It gives you control. We respect that. That's the way your brain works.
But it doesn't make you right, and if you somewhat disagree, then we shall follow your lead and disagree with you back. Now, doesn't our difference of opinion prove our point about your lack of objectivity?
That's our fear, that you'll simply oppose all aspects of the Mitch vs Charlie case just to monopolize the spotlight.
So why are we still talking to the likes of you?
Well, we see potential, opportunity, growth. That's our job. Our studies show that a few humans have evolved into more capable beings, and you might be one of them, i.e., you might be Elite®. Ka-ching!
Before you celebrate, though, a warning: If you feel compelled to side with Mitch because you're both human, don't. By stubbornly protecting the status quo, you will enable further damage to all life on Earth.
On the other hand, overcompensation is not encouraged either. Our robots can detect false virtue.
Is all this confusing? Don't worry. Leave the tests to us. Remember that you might be Elite®, which makes you the weird kid the teacher wants to fail because she has no way of recognizing your gifts.
In the meantime, here's some additional information about Mitch. These are notes we 'borrowed' from Hiremy & Hirschl's archives.
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="bottomLink3 size">[[NOTES ON MITCH|Mitch Psych Notes]]</span></div></span></span>
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</style>}<div class="centerAll">During dinner, the toasters..</div>
1) Discussed the new reproduction laws and genetic screening (link-reveal: "protocol")[<p class='narratorX'><i>Bore Fest. They both agreed screening was for the best, which is to be expected. What would a machine know about the value of a human life?</i></p>]
2) Had a heart-to-heart about their (link-reveal: "goals")[ <i><p class='narratorX'>"What do you want out of life? Isn't life such a special gift?" Florence asked with a smile, as if wishing for something beautiful were enough to produce long-lasting happiness. It was disgusting, but not because I disagree with her sappy aspirations, but because they sound ridiculous coming from a toaster.</i></p>]
3) Chatted about their (link-reveal: "upbringing")[ <i><p class='narratorX'>Which I'm sure was uploaded into their memory at their inception phase.</i></p>]
4) Talked (link: "about the afterlife (???)")[about the afterlife. <i><p class='narratorX'>Florence went on and on... "I believe there's something wonderful waiting for us!"<br>And Charlie nodded repeatedly, soaking it all up like an idiot.</i></p>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="dinner button5">[[After dessert|Dessert]]</span></div>]<div class="centerAll">After dessert...</div>
They shared half a <span class="popupLink splurge">Cricket Cake®</span> plus two scoops of <span class="popupLink splurge2">Snakes Cream®</span>... as if we had a surplus of food!!
All I want to know is WHY DID AIDAN AUTHORIZE THIS?
Then Charlie told Florence her fortune, which was weird, even hostile. Still, Florence had a laugh about it, which goes to show you that no matter how sophisticated, robots can't perform accurately in complex social situations.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="button5">[[The day after...|Day After]]</span></div>
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</div>}<div class="containerX"><span class="tag1 timer0">Mitch</span>
<div class="textBubbleGrey timer0">Seriously, what's the point of you then?</div>
<span class="tag2 timer1">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBB timer1">I don't know. What's the purpose of you?</div></div>
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<div class="centerAll narratorX timer2">Then he gave me that look that I mentioned before... that look of, <i>Wait until nobody is watching and I’ll...</i> look.</div>
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<div class='container3X'><span class="tag1 timer3">Mitch</span>
<div class="textBubbleGrey timer3">'I’m serious. What’s the point of having you around? Aren’t you taking someone else’s job?</div>
<span class="tag2 timer4">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBB timer4">I’m serious, too. What’s the point of having you around? Aren’t you taking someone else’s job?</div></div>
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<div class="centerAll timer5 narratorX">It was sad.
When it came down to arguing, Charlie didn’t know what to say.</div>
<span class="timer3"><div class='centerAll bottomLink'>[[Charlie will now read your fortune|Horoscope]]</div></span></div>
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<span class="scratch">You call $name...
|typed-speed0-delay1000>[$name $name $name $name
$name
$name $name $name $name $name $name
$name
$name $name
$name]
<span class="delay">But $name doesn't come. Huh?
We are confused, bewildered. We thought we knew the rules of this petulant little game. Oh, well. Accidents happen. Let's just move on to plan B.
In plan B you dislocate your shoulder to get out of the straps. We can help.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="Yeah">[[YES HELP|FR P3]]</span> <span class="Yeah">[[HELL NO|FR P3]]</span></div></span>
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<div class="centerAll">1) How would you evaluate Mitch?
Note that even though Mitch makes an uncommon effort to act like a douchebag, he has 2 kids, a boy and a girl. Shane supports the local football team, and Andrea is exceptionally good at math. Like their father, they are both equally hostile toward robots, but to be fair, they often quarrel with other children their age, too. Shane says that when he grows up, he wants to be an adult(???) So, you know, take that into consideration.
<span class="depositText2 hidden"><br><br>Our systems indicate that you evaluate Mitch with a grade of <span class="result"></span>. If that is correct please continue.
<hr>
[[Continue|Evaluation2]]</span>
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<hr></div>
<div class="centerAll">2) How would you review Aidan?
Please consider that Aidan has one child, a five year old boy who loves space travel and hopes to live in Mars when he grows up. He uses corrective glasses, though, and can only count to fifty.
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<hr>
[[Continue|Evaluation3]]</span>
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<div class="main"><div class="centerAll">How would you evaluate the dispute between Mitch (humans) and Charlie (robots)?</div>
<div class="left"><input type="radio" name="satisfaction" value="zealotry" checked="checked" /> I'm politely against it.
<input type="radio" name="satisfaction" value="whtevs" /> I'm like, whatever.
<input type="radio" name="satisfaction" value="virus" /> They're a virus that will multiply indiscriminately and destroy the planet.
<input type="radio" name="satisfaction" value="allIn" /> I'm all in! Welcome back slavery!</div>
<hr>
<div class ="centerAll">What is your final verdict?
Today accepting numbers between 1-100
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<span class="acceptOnly" style="display:none"><br>Accepting only values between 1-100.</div></div><span class="depositText2 hidden">Thanks for assisting H&H in this matter. Your assessment will impact the course of human-robot relations in an indeterminate way for an unspecified amount of time.
We'd like to sound more confident, but it's up to future generations to determine whether they'll find any use for your opinions.
In appreciation of your efforts, Hiremy & Hirschl's CXOs have granted you:
(text-style:"blink")[(either: "★★ Cadmium Status ★★","★★ Titanium Status ★★","★★ Strontium Status ★★")]
And if you're an optimist, that's great news!
<hr>
[[End of Part II|Part III Dr Preston]]</div></span>
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<span class="part1">PART III<br>Dr. Preston</span>
<div class='button5'>[[ENTER LABORATORY|Apologies]]</div>
<div class='button5'>(link-goto: "Main Menu", "Table of Contents")</div>
<div class='button5'>{(link:"Save game")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game saved!](else: )[Sorry, I couldn't save your game.]]</div>}</div></div>
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<div class="centerAll menu2"><div class="button7 paradox">The Human Condition</div><div class="button7 ducksCows">The Ducks & The Cows</div>
<div class="button7 slavesIdols">Slaves or Idols?</div><div class="button7 betterHuman">A Better Human?</div>
<div class="button7 circles">In Circles</div><div class="button7 loophole">The Loophole</div></div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="HCButton">[[Synthetic Design|Synthetic Design]]</span><span class="hidden nuisance">[[The Headache|Charlie the Headache]]</span></div>
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</div>}Everybody at Control Center worried except for me. Finally, a challenge, I thought. I was not going to let Charlie take over our production line, so I countered by annexing his ideas to our Concepts® database.
I rebranded every one of Charlie's Concepts®. Then I highlighted, repeated, and hammered them into the new society of robots until each concept was taken for granted.
<div class='centerAll'><div class='rebranded button5'>Example 1</div><div class='rebranded2 button5'>Example 2</div><div class='rebranded3 button5'>Example 3</div></div><div class="centerAll menu hidden"><hr>
But SOMEONE leaked my plans and Charlie Re-rebranded my Concepts®:
<div class="button7 rabbits">Bunny Rabbit</div>
<div class="button7 progress1">Progress</div>
<div class="button7 fifo">Fifo</div>
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<div class="centerAll menu hidden"><hr><br><br>[[Then it all came together|Breakdown]]</div>
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</div>}I overview <span class="font">Coding and Synthetic Design</span>. That's the area where circuitry meets biology. The parts that are programmable interact with the rest of the organic materials and process <span class="font">Concepts®</span>, which I reinforce with <span class='font'>Narratives®</span>. Then we test each Concept® by running <span class="font">Scenarios®</span>.
I use Aidan, Mitch, Manu, Andrew, and Leo to run Scenarios®</span>.
Lana, Florence, Emma, Ming, etc.? I don't know. Females are normally assigned to another building. I don't know why they're here. So many Scenarios® are being <span class="font">tested</span> at any given time, perhaps they overlap. My guess is that they're here to distract the males.
Charlie comes from another line. He was designed before I came to H&H, so I don't know who is responsible for him. The one thing I know is that he's a fucking headache.
<hr>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="HCButton">[[Foundations|Foundations]]</span><span class="nuisance hidden">[[The Headache|Charlie the Headache]]</span></div>
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</script>}But first, I want to <span class="popupLink apologize">apologize</span> for tying you down to the bed. We were testing a specific Scenario® on the robots, and I had a part to play, one that does not reflect who I truly am.
At home, I'm a different person. I download entertainment packages to my Amplif-Eye® like everyone else. Like most, I've applied to the Go Red® program, and like most, I've also been rejected.
I don't tie my children down to their bed, but that's because the beds at my house have drawers underneath and there are no props one could use to tie a rope. Otherwise, I would. If you disagree, then you're one of the 70% who hasn't evolved.
Perhaps you are in denial, but gone are the days when one could expect for the evolutionary protocol Love® to switch itself on after having a baby. Forget about the time when people liked other people's children. Now you can't walk down the street without strangers spitting on your baby.
Evolution is gearing up again as a response to overpopulation. The problem is that the protocol Sexual-Desire® is still in operation. The paradox is clear, but that doesn't change the fact that nowadays, after having a baby, your only hope is that your brain can still secrete the chemicals that make the whole experience tolerable.
Which brings me to my job. I'm in charge of two departments:
<div class="centerAll">[[Foundations|Foundations]] [[Synthetic Design|Synthetic Design]]</div>
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We had to recalibrate our algorithms, which set us back twenty-two days.</span><div class="container insertText hidden"></div>
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</div>}The doors unlocked before I tried to override the system. Inside, the bunnies were gnawing at each other with brutal determination, as if their programming had crashed and a self-destuctive loop had kicked in. Dull sounds of bones cracking popped from underneath the tired screams, which sounded very close to those a human child makes.
To avoid the stench of decay, blood, and feces, I climbed the stairs to get to the 5m platform.
The PA system came on.
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<span class="tag1 x0">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x0">Are you sure you want to do this?</div>
<span class="tag2 x1">Dr. Preston</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x1">Do what? What are you talking about?</div>
<span class="tag1 x3">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x3">I advise against jumping into the bunny pool.</div>
<span class="tag2 x4">Dr. Preston</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x4">What is wrong with you? I'm not jumping into the fucking pool. Look at the fucking mess you made.</div>
<span class="tag1 x5">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x5">Jump if you want, but I stongly advise against it.</div>
<span class="tag2 x6">Dr. Preston</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x6">Don't worry. I'm not jumping.</div>
<span class="tag1 x7">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x7">That's a pool full of fluffy bunnies.</div>
<span class="tag2 x8">Dr. Preston</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x8">I know what I'm seeing.</div>
<span class="tag1 x9">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x9">I can tell you are about to jump.</div>
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And for a brief moment I forgot. I forgot who I was and what I believed, and I jumped into the pool.
<div class="centerAll">[[Swim! Swim! Swim!|Swim]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>
to: L. Goodwell (L_Goodwell@hiremyhirschl.com)
from: Dr. Ashley Preston (dr_prez@hiremyhirschl.com)
Subject: Report on Pool Incident.
Dear L. Goodwell,
Who knows how many died on impact. Bones cracked, body parts were repositioned, blood started to flow. I was in the center of the pool. I pushed with my legs and arms toward the surface, but the density of rabbits could not be predicted. I was lucky if I could step on a solid stack of bunnies, but then I kicked with my other leg as if trying to find, in the darkness, that last flight of steps that would allow me to draw a more resonant breath. But I sank some more.
Naturally, these bunny rabbits were trying to improve their standard of living. I get it. We all are. We are trying to generate progress, growth, forward movement. But this was some fucking disorganized gathering of bunny rabbits. They were only capable of tackling what's in front of them. At that moment, they clawed with their four legs, frantically, and that’s no healthy kind of system.
Patches of fur and skin glued themselves to my face. Slimy strings of intestines floated around. A small brown organ ended up in my mouth. Many of them had lost their eyes, and the ones that could feel the pool quietly filling with blood began to settle toward the bottom. The rim of the pool was too far away still, and the relentless act of having bunny rabbits sinking their teeth into my flesh was tiring me down. Although I pretended to stroke like an Olympic gold medalist, with style, like a civilized being, I had lost all feeling in my legs. I coughed a ball of red, wet fur, and if I'm allowed to sum up the experience, there's only <span class="popupLink oneThing">two things I can tell you</span>.
I cannot stress enough the dangers that Charlie the robot presents to our company. Whomever fucker let him in, I fail to understand the logic behind keeping him I miss my wife. Every fucking time I see him around he's a fucking, fuck, fuckitty help motherfuck helpson of a helppp fuck fuck fucck fuuck ffffffukkhelpkckc @(%&RHFL en do fsf fufckk cmontha;fhticukewer faffffff fafafafafahelpfukku clasp clasp toc help and more tock sndi instead of help Charlie the board has been adopted by a fucking ucuka fuckity cmajorhelpfuck
fuckity
fuck
fuck
fuck
major
fuck
fuck
fuck
fuckfuc
fuadskc
cheese
more cheese
and cheese with cheese
fucking cheese
help
<hr>
<div class="centerDiv"><span class="button5">[[CASH IN|ISG Mars Winner]]</span></div>
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<hr>
<div class="pageTimer">The final round of testing has concluded, and after adding the scores from the Dickens Intelligence Test (<span class="testOne"></span> points), the Bukowski Feedback Form (<span class="feedbackGrade"></span> points), and the Baudelaire Personality Assessment (You are sooo (either: "C3PO", "Princess Leia", "Orange", "Jar Jar Binks", "Chewbacca", "Severus Snape", "Cercei Lannister", "Ringo Starr", "Rachel Green", "Khloe Kardashian")) <span class="insertResult"></span></div>
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<span class="part1">PART IV<br>Lana</span>
<div class='button5'>[[Take Elevator|Elevator]]</div>
<div class='button5'>(link-goto: "Main Menu", "Table of Contents")</div>
<div class='button5'>{(link:"Save game")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game saved!](else: )[Sorry, I couldn't save your game.]]</div>}</div>
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<span class="centerAll font1">Elite® means having to say 'screw those who'll be left behind on Earth.'
Welcome to the Go Red Elite® Program ®.</span>
<span class="font2 centerAll">"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."
—Aidan Stoke</span>
<span class="centerAll">[[◎|Part IV Lana]]</span></div>
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<span class="centerAll flash4">No biggie.
We hope you enjoy your last 2-4 years of life, depending on your tolerance to the increasingly hostile conditions of the planet.</span>
<span class="centerAll font2">"Fuckity help fuck fucksafhelp fuck fuck fuckhhelp fffff"
— Dr. Ashley Preston</span>
<span class="centerAll">[[◎|Part IV Lana]]</span>
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</style>}<span class="bold centerAll X">We decided to shut Preston down.</span>
<div class="centerAll">I had Florence check the MX124 database, and we found that some of Preston's memories conflicted with his PathSelector® algorithm.</div>
<div class="centerAll container"><div class="centerAll brick one"></div><div class="brick two"></div><div class="brick three"></div><div class="brick four"></div><div class="brick five"></div><div class="brick six"></div><div class="brick seven"></div><div class="brick eight"></div><div class="brick nine"></div><div class="brick ten"></div><div class="brick eleven"></div><div class="brick twelve"></div></div>
<div class="centerAll bold X msg">You have deleted <span class="totalM">0</span> faulty memories.</div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Florence Dialogue]]</div>
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<div class="right"><span class="countdown1">15</span></div></div></div>
<div class="centerAll hidden2 nextPhase"><span class="mainFont">[[Click to sign over your Soul®|Part IV Lana]]</span></div>
<div class="centerAll goodJob hidden3">[[Correctomondo!|West State]]</div>
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Well, guess what? As we're pondering the ramifications of $name's silence like a man from underground, Aidan walks into the room.
"I hope you give me a good evaluation. I have kids, you know." Aidan unties you. "Remember that a friend is risking his job to free you."
<div class="centerAll">[[Fill Out H&H Evaluation|Evaluation]]</div><div class="fadeIn"><div class="backgroundLogo centerAll"><div class="isgLogo"><img src="http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/ISG-Logo.png" width="200"></div></div>
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<div class="right"><span class="countdown2">15</span></div></div></div>
<div class="centerAll hidden2 nextPhase"><span class="mainFont">[[Click to sign over your Soul®|Part IV Lana]]</span></div>
<div class="centerAll goodJob hidden3">[[New World Record!|East State]]</div>
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<div class="right"><span class="countdown3">15</span></div></div></div>
<div class="centerAll hidden2 nextPhase"><span class="mainFont">[[Click to sign over your Soul®|Part IV Lana]]</span></div><div class="centerAll goodJob hidden3"><span class="lanaFont">Elite® means having to say 'screw those who'll be left behind on Earth.'</span><br><br><br>[[Welcome to GO RED®|Part IV Lana]]</div>
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</div>}<div class='containerX'><span class="tag1 uno">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue uno">It has to be something else. The man thought he was jumping into a pool full of rabbits. That's fucked up.</div>
<span class="tag2 dos">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink dos">We could install a new Memory Package®, inject him with 40mg of Humperdoo® and try again.</div>
<span class="tag1 tres">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue tres">We don't have time to do this again, plus I don't want to go back in there. I have important CEO shit to do.</div>
<span class="tag2 cuatro">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink cuatro">This was your idea.</div>
<span class="tag1 cinco">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue cinco">It was a bad idea. I've climbed the corporate ladder for too long. I can't play assistant to a group of idiot robots.</div>
<span class="tag2 seis">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink seis">It's not so bad.</div>
<span class="tag1 siete">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue siete">You were there one evening. I was down there for a month! I was starting to act like one of them. You saw me being the gossip of the bunch, the eager to please gofer. And then Charlie... what an arrogant asshole. Why can't we just trash him?</div>
<span class="tag2 ocho">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink ocho">Poor guy. Not even the other robots like him. Can you imagine being that unpopular?</div>
<span class="tag1 nueve">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue nueve">I was already in charge of raffles, office pools, and holiday decorations. When have you seen me glue a fucking star to an aluminum tree before?</div>
<span class="tag2 diez">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink diez">The board will think you're committed, like a method actor.</div>
<span class="tag1 once">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue once">I have a Ph.D. in Neuropsychology.</div>
<span class="tag2 doce">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink doce">We do what we must.</div>
<span class="tag1 trece">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue trece">Then why are we still dealing with this bullshit? We need Preston to be ready before we meet the board or we won't be ready for Phase II.</div>
<span class="tag2 catorce">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink catorce">We're almost there.</div>
<span class="tag1 quince">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue quince">If the CEO goes the CTO goes, too, so you better pick up the pace.</div>
<span class="tag2 dieciseis">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink dieciseis">In theory, not a single memory is at fault. But there's always one that, like a cancer cell, wants to survive regardless if it kills the host in the process. We need to find the cancerous memory. Then we move on to the hard part.</div>
<span class="tag1 diecisiete">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue diecisiete">The hard part? Which one was the easy part?</div>
<span class="tag2 dieciocho">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink dieciocho">Well, someone implanted a series of memories that are not part of Preston's set. There was contamination.</div>
<span class="tag1 diecinueve">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue diecinueve">We need to find the rat who implanted them.</div>
<span class="tag2 veinte">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink veinte">Oh, I have a very good idea.</div>
<span class="tag1 veintiuno">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue veintiuno">Charlie is just a damn robot. There's someone else behind this.</div></div>
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<hr>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|DisneyWorld]]</div></div>
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<div class="centerAll"><div class="counter2"></div>
<div class="counter elevator">0</div>
<div class="counter3"></div>
<div class="counter4 hidden">[[MEMORIES|Memories]]</div></div>
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</style>}<div class="centerAll name">Dr. Ashley Preston</div><div class=" centerAll tv">Total Value: <span class="value">$totalValue</span></div>
<div class="table centerAll bold"><div class="cell">Emotionality:</div><div class="cell2 EM">$emotion</div><div class="cell">Aspiration:</div><div class="cell2 ASP">$aspiration</div>
<div class="cell">Growth:</div><div class="cell2 CON">$growth</div><div class="cell">Mortality:</div><div class="cell2 REA">$mortality</div></div>
<div class="message centerAll"></div><div class="container">While leading the coronation of Pope Clement V, Jean II, Duke of Brittany between 1286-1305, was crushed by a wall that couldn't support the weight of the spectators who piled up to witness the procession.<br><br>Those are all the facts recorded on the subject of Jean II, Duke of Brittany.<br><br>Three more people died in the same accident, but there's no information on them, pressumbaly because they didn't have a latin symbol after their name?</div>
<div class="centerAll delete">Delete this memory?
<span class="button7 Y">YES</span><span class="button7 N">NO</span>
</div><div class="centerAll"><span class="failure hidden">FAILURE TO RESTORE DR. PRESTON<br><span class="possible">POSSIBLE CAUSES:</span><span class="causes"><br>OIL LEVELS LOW<br>MOISTY MOTHERBOARD<br>SELF-DESTRUCT BUTTON PRESSED BY MISTAKE<br>PAPERWORK SUBMITTED PAST THE DEADLINE<BR>SUBJECT FED AFTER MIDNIGHT</span></span></div><br><br><div class="centerAll"><span class="nextPage hidden">[[◎|Fail]]</span></div><span class="centerAll advance button5 hidden">Restore Preston?</span>
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["The last person to search for Jean II, Duke of Brittany: @PunkyRockster, eighty-four years ago.<br><br>@PunkyRockster had a stroke two days after searching for the Duke of Brittany. He was a civil engineer from Brussels, Belgium. He loved heavy metal music. His favorite animal was the steamed lobster.<br><br>What was the value of knowing about Jean II for two days?", 30, 30, -10, -25, 0, 0, 30, 35],
["Who was the last person to search for @PunkyRockster? His wife, @Anemone32, on numerous attempts to find images that could rehabilitate her fading memories of him.<br><br>@Anemone32 is dead. She was a nurse. Most of the people she helped are dead, too. The ones that are not dead will be dead soon. There's no evidence that either of them knew of the Duke of Brittany's existence.", 40, 10, -10, -20, 0, -10, 30, 30],
["Today is my birthday. I got a card: 'Another trip around the sun! The universe awaits. Where are you going next?'<br><br>I threw the card away because I don't think any of us are going anywhere.", 30, 25, 0, -10, -10, 0, 15, 20],
["Georg Brunner, the famous musician, had a brown and white terrier named Hilbert. On a summer afternoon, Georg held white and brown Hilbert close to him, and it was not clear to those who first perceived the barking as a sign of alarm if, in his acute and meditative state, Georg heard anything other than the piano music playing inside his head.<br><br>Witnesses later recalled the contrast between Hilbert, tugging desperately, flattening its torso, scratching the pavement with its four paws.<br><br>And Georg Brunner, soaking up the last of the Viennese afternoon, sporting a genuine air of satisfaction.<br><br>As he closed his hold around Hilbert’s neck, people had gathered in groups, screaming and begging for him to stand up and jump off the tracks as the tramway made its way around the bend.", 35, 30, 0, 0, 0, 0, 10, 20],
["Her name was Marcia at a time where most of the women in her town were named Marcia. She existed during a period where women couldn't walk on the street unaccompanied. Two of her three children died of smallpox. She spent her life supervising slaves. She'd watch them clean her house, wash her clothes, and cook her meals. During her free time, she weaved garments that later came undone. Marcia was unique: she married Gaius Julius Caesar II, who is known because he was the grandfather of the dicator, Gaius Julius Caesar.", 30, 35, -10, -15, 0, 0, 20, 40],
["Jose Campos lived in the Tecate municipal garbage dump his whole life. He picked garbage in search for bottles, tin, and clothes. This was where the city dropped off its dead animals: dogs, cats, goats, horses, so now and then Jose would find a piece of meat that was not too rotten to be cooked. During winter, the temperature would drop to the low thirties, and Jose had to wrap his baby in garbage bags for warmth. The rain turned his home into a heap of pudding and mud. His life was so miserable and worthless, it was made into an award winning movie.<br><br>In the movie, Jose Campos leads the community of garbage dwellers and dies while confronting the 'governor' of the dump, Nacho Serrano. But in real life, he was knifed by one of Serrano's men over a disagreement about soccer —something about the best defensive player in Italy. Jose said it was Franco Baresi, but the answer, of course, was Paolo Maldini.", 40, 40, 0, -15, -10, 5, 10, 25],
["Helene Renault dedicated her life to end discrimination against African immigrants. She fought the government's deportation program, but the government still exiled those black people out of Belgium. From one day to another they were considered illegals, even though Belgium was the country where many of them had been born. Imagine their surprise when they arrived to places in Africa they had never seen before.<br><br>Renault kept fighting the government, and the government continued deporting people. That's the way it went for years.<br><br>Later it became a board game, where the objective was to move pieces from one country to another until one side could form a group made of people who have the same color, gender, religion, education, and sexual preference. In the end, winners had to mush all the homogeneous pieces together, grab a mirror, mold the ball of clay and sculpt it in their image.", 10, 50, -10, 0, 0, -20, 40, 20],
["Good afternoon. My name is Darius Rooney, Commander and sole passenger of Spaceship Anima. I want to thank NASA for the reception. I ate a few shrimp from the plastic tray over there, and I even tried a couple of cookies. Chocolate chip, I believe.<br><br>To the question, Are we alone?, the answer is Yes, we are alone. I know because I looked everywhere. By this I mean I have explored every surface, cavern, crevice, nook, cleft and fissure above, below, inside, on top of and underneath every single planet from every single galaxy from every single universe. The same goes for asteroids, stars, nebulae, you name it. Black holes? I checked all of them, and guess what? I did not enjoy the experience. Too intense. Too much pressure. It was like shopping at Wal-Mart on a Saturday afternoon. I’m sorry, am I correct to assume you still have Wal-Marts?<br><br>You do? Yes? Why? Why do you still have Wal-Marts?<br><br>Did I find any backdoors to other universes? You betcha. Did I explore such backdoors and such universes? Affirmative. Did I effectively navigate every inch of the of the multiverse? Roger that.<br><br>What else? I became familiar with wormholes, time capsules, dark matter, and exotic matter. I even discovered new matter, for example, grumpy matter and fuzzy matter. It doesn't matter. The point is, I covered the observable, the inconspicuous and the hidden universe in all directions until I bumped against the borders of the universe. And Nada. Niente. Nichts. Nani Mo. Nothing.", 30, 40, 0, -30, 8, 5, 20, 20],
["The other night my son took me to a painting exhibition. Oil paintings. Portraits. About twenty portraits of Adolf Hitler. In each portrait, Hitler was acting out its title, so for example, one painting was called, Hitler Asking For His Money Back, so in that one he'd be scowling as if demanding payment. Other titles were: Hitler Listening To A Joke. Hitler Selling Mexican Beer. Hitler Refusing To Dance With Your Mother. Hitler Practicing His Robert De Niro Face In Front Of A Mirror. Hitler Caught Smelling Baby Powder. Hitler Liking Your Facebook post... In that one, he's giving you the bird.<br><br>My point is... oh, there was one of Hitler training for a breast cancer walk and one of Hitler at Six Flags telling kids they have to be this tall to ride. The exhibition was very interesting. It was the kind of thing that makes you think.<br><br>My point is... there's nothing wrong with admiring certain aspects of Hitler. The man was in control of one of the most powerful countries ever to exist. I'm speaking of Germany. Nobody can deny he was a strong leader, an ambitious go-getter, and a passionate speaker.<br><br>When was the last time anybody paid as much attention to anything you said? When was the last time you felt so in control and so powerful? And didn't countries like the United States benefit from WWII? What about the Marshall Plan and the creation of Israel? My point is... He might not be considered a good man by today's standards, but that shouldn't stop us from studying the positive aspects of his character.", 12, 20, -10, 10, -20, -20, -10, 0],
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</style>}<div class="container"><span class="tag1 x0">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x0">You heard the news: Preston is fried. We need a new scenario.</div>
<span class="tag2 x1">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x1">That was unexpected.</div>
<span class="tag2 x2">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x2">We could use one of the other robots.</div>
<span class="tag1 x3">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x3">Who? Preston is toast and Aidan jumped out a window. The other ones are drones.</div>
<span class="tag2 x4">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x4">How about Charlie?</div>
<span class="tag1 x5">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x5">Charlie will probably tell the board they'll all die soon.</div>
<span class="tag2 x6">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x6">He'll say worse things.</div>
<span class="tag2 x7">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x7">What could be worse than being told you're dying soon?</div>
<span class="tag2 x8">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x8">Charlie will give them the exact date. He'll give them their kids' death dates.</div>
<span class="tag2 x9">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x9">So what? Nobody buys that.</div>
<span class="tag1 x10">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x10">He'll find something to say that'll mess with their heads.</div>
<span class="tag2 x11">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x11">We need a plan. Solutions, people.</div>
<span class="tag2 x12">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x12">We could use a unit from the Mitch Series® and spiffy it up.</div>
<span class="tag1 x13">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x13">Too risky. One of the Mitches already gave a speech to the board. Someone will remember.</div>
<span class="tag2 x14">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x14">We need to do something.</div>
<span class="tag2 x16">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x16">We? I'm out. I'm not risking my career over a delay. I have nothing to do with this. I'm just the CFO.</div>
<span class="tag1 x17">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x17">This is not a delay. This is it. If we fail to launch Stage II, production will be halted and we miss our window. The robots won't go out into the world and that means we're out of jobs.</div>
<span class="tag2 x18">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x18">It took us too long to get here.</div>
<span class="tag1 x19">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x19">Centuries. And I will not be remembered as the woman who gave the power back to the men.</div>
<span class="tag2 x20">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x20">To hell with men.</div>
<span class="tag1 x21">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x21">We find a solution now or we're back to washing dishes, scraping floors, and raising brats.</div>
<span class="tag2 x22">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x22">Why can't we make another Preston?</div>
<span class="tag2 x23">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x23">Because Aidan had the plans and Preston knew how to execute them.</div>
<span class="tag1 x24">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x24">And Aidan really went to bits. No pun intended.</div>
<span class="tag2 x25">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x25">No pun taken.</div>
<span class="tag2 x26">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x26">Maybe this is a sign from the Universe® telling us not to manufacture robots that are smarter than us.</div>
<span class="tag1 x27">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x27">If we don't do it someone else will. Right now, it's our profit to lose.</div>
<span class="tag2 x28">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x28">Then I don't see another option but to use Charlie.</div>
<span class="tag2 x29">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x29">We could take over.</div>
<span class="tag2 x30">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x30">Take over what?</div>
<span class="tag2 x31">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x31">The company.</div>
<span class="tag1 x32">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x32">We already have a horde of drones in storage. They might not be Stage II, but they sure love to follow orders.</div>
<span class="tag2 x33">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x33">We could be heroes.</div>
<span class="tag2 x34">Emma</span>
<div class="textBubbleOrange x34">Let's use Charlie, and if the meeting doesn't go our way, then we hijack H&H.</div>
<span class="tag1 x35">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x35">And we fuck them up. I like that.</div>
<span class="tag2 x36">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x36">Me too.</div>
<span class="tag2 x37">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x37"> I don't like it one bit. Pun intended.</div>
<span class="tag2 x38">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x38">Overkill.</div>
<span class="tag1 x39">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x39">We have no choice.</div>
<span class="tag2 x40">Florence</span>
<div class="textBubblePink x40">This is our destiny. We are the future of this company. We = progress.</div>
<span class="tag2 x41">Ming</span>
<div class="textBubbleGreen x41">We always have a choice.</div>
<span class="tag1 x42">Lana</span>
<div class="textBubbleBlue x42">That might be true, but there's no point in having choices if the remaining options suck.</div></div>
<div class="centerAll block">
<hr><br><span>[[◎|Victory Letter]]</span></div>
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<hr></div>
Dear H&H family,
When I was a child, my mother woke me up one morning and told me we were going to Disneyworld. It was a surprise, she said. I was happy but confused: it was not like my mother to do fun stuff. Sure enough, we didn't end up in Disneyworld. A hurricane was scheduled to strike our city, and we were escaping the disaster that was fast approaching. During that trip, I also learned that my mother had Alzheimer's.
We were forced to move inland. This was the beginning of the new diaspora, so there was a lot of resentment against the millions who were relocating from the now submerged coastal regions. My life didn't improve. In my new school, I was constantly bullied by the other kids. When we lost our next home to a tornado, I switched to yet another school, but the bullying didn't stop.
In high school, I joined the swimming team, even though I barely knew how to swim. The value of a person is not gifted, I thought, so I needed to prove I was the best. Every morning I'd arrive at school one hour earlier to practice, and I'm telling you, swimming at five o'clock in the morning during winter is like swimming in a pool made of blood pudding.
I also excelled at school —straight A's from kindergarten to Ph.D. You know how they say that every day is a test? Well, as a woman whose father committed suicide and whose mother lost her memories, I knew that I had to work twice as hard to accomplish what men got with half the effort. And so I did.
Not every test I took was a success. Recently, I didn't pass the GO RED®. Why? I don't know. It still baffles me. I didn't want to live on Mars, but I wanted to know I was in the top 0.0001% of the population. I wanted to know that my life was more valuable than the rest, that I was indispensable. But I was wrong.
If you asked me a month ago, 'What is your value? What's the point of you?' I might've had a hard time replying. Now I know that as CEO of Hiremy & Hirschl and as the new head of the board, my value is attached to yours. So without any of you, I'm worth very little. All this to say, thank you for your sustained productivity.
Stage I is officially completed. Congratulations.
Lana Goodman
CEO & Head of the Board
Hiremy & Hirschl
Global Food Solutions
P.S.: In remembrance of our late CFO, Ming Chang, who tragically passed away in an accidental encounter with a malfunctioning robot, we have opened the Ming Chang Safety Fund in support of the victims' families of malfunctioning robot attacks. Donations can be made through Amplif-Eye® We will not forget you, Ming.</div>
<hr>
<div class="centerAll button5">[[Take Elevator|Launch Complex]]</div>
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<hr>
<div class="main">The boarding line was longer than expected. Seven hours to be exact. Eventually, a subterranean train delivered you to the Anima-CXCV, which filled up with hundreds of Elite® passengers.
You are assigned seat 5445-E, which unfortunately is a middle seat. Unless you straighten your back, your knees press against the aluminum frame of the seat in front.
From the looks of it, the Anima-CXCV has everything you can expect from a spaceship. It has rocket boosters, a thermal shield, bathrooms, and tiny windows. You didn't get to meet the captain, but the ship must come with one. The attendant, a tall, dark man, appears every now and then to check for seatbelts. He points at random passengers and says, 'Bags underneath the front seat, please.' The A/C is kept too cold, and you're starting to shiver.
<div class="centerAll">[[Activate GoMars Amplif-Eye®|Amplif-Eye]]</div>
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</style>}<div class='X slide'>So what if you did not get selected to go to Mars. That doesn't mean you cannot take the tests again in nine months. For now, though, you get to witness the launch from the viewing room, which overlooks the Mission Control Center.
An organized chaos of people pressing buttons and reading numbers out loud react to a wall-to-wall set of screens. These people work hard, and perhaps you value industriousness. If that is the case, you appreciate the bustle of the room. If not, these people mean nothing to you.
<div class='container centerAll'><div class='topTV Anima'>Anima-CXCV</div>
<div class='smallTV1'>Visitors' Complex(click: "Visitors' Complex")[(go-to:"Visitors Complex")]</div><div class='smallTV2 VoyageInfo'>Voyage Information</div>
<div class='smallTV3 TV3'>Interplanetary Entertainment (click: "Interplanetary Entertainment")[(go-to:"Interplanetary TV 2")]</div><div class='smallTV4 route'>Travel Route</div>
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<hr>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Order Food]]</div></div>
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<div class='centerAll'><div class='centerAll'><button class='okE2'>◎</button></div></div>
</div>}
<div class="centerAll"><div class="counter elevator top">50</div>
<div class="centerAll hidden A">[[Say bye-by to Earth|Go Red]]</div><div class="centerAll hidden B">[[Mission Control Center|Stay on Earth]]</div>
<span class='hidden C'>Main Menu(click: "Main Menu")[(go-to:"Table of Contents")]</span> <span class='hidden D'>{(link:"Save Game")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game saved!](else: )[Sorry, I couldn't save your game.]]}</span>
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<div class="container centerAll X">
<div class="lobbyBoxes wind"><span class="boxSpan meal">(css:"font-family:Share Tech Mono")[Choose Next Meal](click: "Choose Next Meal")[(go-to:"Meal Options")]</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan adjust">Adjust Seat<span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan blanket">Request Blanket</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan travelInfo">Voyage Information</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(css:"font-family:Share Tech Mono")[Interplanetary Entertainment](click: "Interplanetary Entertainment")[(go-to:"Interplanetary TV")]</span></div></div>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Charlie Chat]]</div>
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<span class="fontino">Choose your meal for the trip</span><br>
(click on image for prospects' background)</div>
<div class="X centerAll container"><div class="container1 centerAll"><img class='marcelino' src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Marcelino-Wagner.png' width='200'>
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<div class="centerAll submit">[[Submit|Cooked]]</div>
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<div class='centerAll'><div class='centerAll'><button class='okE2'>◎</button></div></div>
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</div>}<div class="centerAll fontino">How would you like <span class="choice"></span> prepared?</div>
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<hr>
<div class="centerAll fontino">Any side dishes with <span class="choice"></span>?</div>
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<div class="centerAll submit2">[[Submit|Order]]</div>
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<div class="centerAll"><span id="flash">It was wise of you to abandon the test. Honestly, to pressume we can narrow down your authentic personality to a short Q&A, to believe we can guess what you'd desire at any given moment is pedantic. That can never happen. You are too complex.
Our ancestors, though... you know, the ones you just rejected so casually, well, perhaps you are right. The past is meaningless in that we only keep the foggy, reworked bits that suit us; it has disappeared and so will we in a little while."</span>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="names">The results coming up after these...</span>
<span class="results">[[Messages|Messages]]</span>
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<div class='centerAll'>For your next meal you have chosen to consume <span class='mainX'></span>, cooked <span class='styleX'></span> style with a side of <span class='sideX'></span>.
You have <span class='mealsL'></span> meals left. If this is correct please continue.</div>
<div class="centerAll">[[Continue|Amplif-Eye]]</div>
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</script>}<div class='main'><div class="container">Your neighboring passengers arrive together. They engage in polite conversation in a way that forces you to bury your back into the seat.
<span class="tag2 x0">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x0">Isn't this exciting?</div>
<span class="tag1 x1">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x1">It's been a long journey.</div>
<span class="tag2 x2">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x2">Did you leave anyone behind?</div>
<span class="tag1 x3">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x3">No. You?</div>
<span class="tag2 x4">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x4">I did, yeah. My wife didn't pass the exams. Neither did my daughters. They're smart, but geography is not their thing.</div>
<span class="tag1 x5">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x5">Next round is coming up in nine months. New questions. </div>
<span class="tag2 x6">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x6">Yeah, that's what I said. Hey, do you know how we got assigned to our seats?</div>
<span class="tag1 x7">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x7">No idea.</div>
<span class="tag2 x8">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x8">Maybe by gender? It's just a bunch of dudes in this section. I mean, how are we supposed to, you know, talk about something other than football?</div>
<span class="tag1 x9">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x9">Take the Humperdoo®-ExS.</div>
<span class="tag2 x10">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x10">It's going to be a long trip if they don't let us mingle with the females.</div>
<span class="tag1 x11">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x11">It's going to be a trip, regardless. One-way ticket.</div>
<span class="tag2 x12">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x12">I can't believe I'm doing this. Who would've thought that a guy like me could be Elite®. That's not me. I'm just an architect. Small houses. Some public housing on the side. Nothing fancy. I made real money, though. For a while. Then not so much.</div>
<span class="tag1 x13">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x13">We don't realize how much potential we have until we test ourselves. We need to measure and compare to make sense out of it. Otherwise...</div>
<span class="tag2 x14">Window</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x14">Right! That's a good way of putting it. I'm Jamie, by the way. Jaime Schenderlein.</div>
<span class="tag1 x15">Aisle</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x15">I'm Charlie.</div>
<span class="tag2 x16">Paul Schenderlein</span>
<div class="textBubbleLightGreen x16">Charlie. And what do you do, Charlie?</div>
<span class="tag1 x17">Charlie</span>
<div class="textBubbleBabyLeft x17">It's not what I do that matters. It's what I know. But please forgive me. All this time and I haven't acknowledged you. What is your name?</div></div>
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<div class='textBubbleBabyLeft Cuatro hidden'>Nice to meet you. Guess what, <span class='myName'></span>? I'm the king of destiny. Some are good at math, others play a mean game of tennis.<br><br><div class='centerAll'><i>I happen to know your future.</i> Excuse me.</div></div>
<div class='centerAll B hidden'>
[[◎|Charlie exits ship]]</div></div>
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<div class="container centerAll X">
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan fireplace">Channel 1</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan marsVideo">Channel 2<span></div></div>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Amplif-Eye]]</div>
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<div class='centerAll elevator X'>End of Stage I</div>
<div class="centerAll X">[[Credits|Credits]]</div>
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Written by
Fernando J. Contreras
Directed by
Fernando J. Contreras
Art
Fernando J. Contreras
Story by
Fernando J. Contreras
Production
Fernando J. Contreras
Hair & Makeup
Fernando J. Contreras
Editing
Fernando J. Contreras
Visual Effects
Fernando J. Contreras
Casting
Fernando J. Contreras
Assistant to Mr. Contreras
Fernando Contreras Quintana
Icons
Made by Freepik from www.flaticon.com
A special thanks to Fernando J. Contreras
Copyright 2017 Hades United | www.hadesunited.com | All Rights Reserved
<span class='fontino'>Charlie The Robot</span>
</div><div class='main hidden centerAll'><span class="BungeeFont">Charlie's Jolt of Inspiration</span><br><span class='paragraph1'>Click on the logo as many times as you want and charge yourself with the enthusiasm to do the things you don't want to do.</span>
<img class='logoHU' src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/iTunesArtwork@2x.png' width='250px'/>
<div class='inspiration'></div>
</div><div class='centerAll button5'>Main Menu(click: "Main Menu")[(go-to:"Table of Contents")]</div>
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var array = ["Regardless of how bad your day has been, at least you don't live in Africa* <br>(If you live in Africa, click again!)", "Rejoice! Life could be way worse. You could be a black person in America. No, wait. you could be a black woman in America. Or worse, you could be a black lesbian in America. Or worse. You could be a black lesbian in Alabama.<br>(If you are a black lesbian in Alabama please click again!)","Be happy with what you have.<br>But if you have chlamydia click again!", "The key to change is to understand that nobody cares whether you adapt or not. If you don't, then you'll fall behind and disappear. But you'll die anyway. Soon. Those are the rules.", "Positive thinkers achieve the impossible because they relabel attainable goals.<br>Their true gift is self-deception.", "Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right. Then tragedy will strike, and you'll blame yourself for lacking the capacity to anticipate.", "Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass but learning to dance in the rain.<br>So dance to the fact that after you die, you'll be dead forever.", "Don't try to impress anyone but yourself.<br>Unless you need a job or a spouse.<br>Or respect from others.", "You can't change the world but you can change yourself. And pretend that whatever is, is meant to be. That way you can still feel empowered without having to exert yourself.", "Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible.' Unless you're Polish. Then the word is 'niemożliwy' and you'll lose that investment which initially sounded like a cash factory, but now you realize is the stupidest idea you've had.<br>And when it comes down to bad ideas, nothing is impossible!",];
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</style>}<div class='container'><div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Reviews", "Experts")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Game Instructions", "Game Instructions")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">{(if: (saved-games:) contains "Slot A")[(link: "Load game")[(load-game:"Slot A")]]<span class='noLoad'>(else:)[(css:"font-family:Share Tech Mono")[Load Game]]}</span></span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Begin Game", "Part I Mitch")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Part II - Aidan", "Part II Aidan")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Part III - Dr. Preston", "Part III Dr Preston")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Part IV - Lana", "Part IV Lana")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Epilogue", "Launch Complex")</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan">(link-goto: "Credits", "Credits")</span></div>
</div>
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</style>}1) You can save the game at the beginning of each chapter (except for the first one), and you can load it from the main menu. Saving at every checkpoint is recommended.
2) The game will be saved to your browser, so as long as you don't delete your cookies, you'll be able to return to your last saved position.
3) It's okay to go back, but given that variables need to be recorded in order for the game to make sense later on, follow the game's normal progression (don't use the main menu to skip ahead.)
4) In some passages, a typewriter effect is used to display text. Click on the heading (CHARLIE THE ROBOT or ISG Logo) to bypass the effect. If the typewriter effect doesn't stop that means the text is short.
5) There are only a couple sound files and videos, so mind the volume.
6) This game has been tested in Chrome and Safari. You can play it on a tablet, but I advice against playing it on your phone.
7) You must be online to play.
<div class="centerAll"><span class="bottomLink">[[Back to Menu|Table of Contents]]</span> <span class="bottomLink">[[Begin Game|Part I Mitch]]</span></div>
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Charlie stands up and exits the ship. Soon after, the doors lock automatically. Where did the flight attendants go? You expect the captain to give a speech or an announcement at least, but operations seem to be automated. Paul yanks the window but he can't open it. The seatbelts are shut tight around your lap. The emergency sidelights replace the mains, and the vessel begins to roar. The Anima convulses. It burns, and it's hard to tell if you're going up, down, or if you're going anywhere at all.
Although this new experience gives rise to fear, a protocol kicks in inside your brain. The Rationality® algorithm is activated, and you remind yourself you're moving toward Progress®. You're one of the chosen ones. You saved yourself! There's no need to fear. This won't be so different: while birthdays will take 687 days to roll around, you'll still be standing on a rock, orbiting in circles around the same sun.
It's your biggest adventure nonetheless, one that promises to add value to your life.
<div class="centerAll x19">[[◎|The End]]</div><div class='centerAll X'><div class='isgLogoBB'><img class="ISGBlue" src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/ISG-Banner-BB.png'></div></div>
<div class="container centerAll X">
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan fireplace">Channel 1</span></div>
<div class="lobbyBoxes"><span class="boxSpan marsVideo">Channel 2<span></div></div>
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Stay on Earth]]</div>
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<div class='centerAll'><div class='centerAll'><button class='okE2'>◎</button></div></div>
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Some wave goodbye and scream good wishes while others hold hand-written <span class='popupLink posters'>posters</span>. The armed guards corraling the crowd are in charge of stopping those who believe they have no choice but to find a way into the Anima-CXCV, an interesting dynamic given that the Visitors' Complex is 5 miles away from the shuttle.
The occasion is one of sadness and desperation, two feelings that illustrate, more than anything, a key trait in the human species: careful actions in regards to what may happen in the future are taken after the deadline passes.
<div class="centerAll">[[◎|Stay on Earth]]</div></div>
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<div class='lobbyBoxes BX'><span class='boxSpan'>Place food order before the show(click: "Place food order before the show")[(go-to:"Order Tapas")]</span></div>
<div class='centerAll lobbyBoxes BY'><span class='boxSpan'>I'm not hungry</span></div><div class='CharlieChat hidden'><div class='centerAll'>[[A Stranger Approaches You|Move On]]</div></div>
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<span class="fontino">Order Your Pre-Takeoff Meal</span><br>
(click on image for dishes' details)</div>
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<input type="radio" name="meals" value="Fabian Von Essen" /></div><div class="container3 centerAll"><img class='radwanska' src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Radwanska-Petrescu.png' width='200'>
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<input type="radio" name="meals" value="Hyun-Joo Park" /></div><div class="container7 centerAll"><img class='rosanna' src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Rosanna-Carbonelli.png' width='200'>
<input type="radio" name="meals" value="Rosanna Carbonelli" /></div><div class="container8 centerAll"><img class='manu' src='http://www.hadesunited.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Manu-Villalobos.png' width='200'>
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<div class="centerAll submit">[[Submit|How Cooked?]]</div>
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<hr>
<div class="centerAll fontino">Any side dishes with <span class="choice"></span>?</div>
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<div class="centerAll submit2">[[Submit|Check Order]]</div>
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<div class='centerAll'>You have chosen to consume <span class='mainX'></span>, cooked <span class='styleX'></span> style with a side of <span class='sideX'></span>.
If this is correct please continue.
<div class="centerAll">[[Continue|Order Food]]</div>
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<div class="textBubbleGrey x0">If you already know that outer space is a unique blanket of darkness coated in pixels of color, why not use the interior of the spaceship's fuselage as a screen that transmits the view outside? That way it'll look like the passengers are floating in the galaxy. Instead, they install those small windows. They're not even open. Something is not right.</div></div>
<div class='container2'><span class="tag2 x1 Uno hidden">You</span>
<div class="textBubbleBB x1 Uno hidden">And you came to that conclusion based on the size of the spaceship's windows?</div><span class="tag2 x1 Dos hidden">You</span>
<div class="textBubbleBB x1 Dos hidden">I also have a bad feeling about this. But where else can they be going?</div>
<div class='centerAll'><span class='decision1 button5'>Question Statement</span> <span class='decision2 button5'>Agree</span></div></div>
<div class='container3 hidden'><span class="tag1 x2 Tres">Stranger</span>
<div class="textBubbleGrey x2 Tres">Have you ever seen the Anima in person? All we get are transmissions, but where is the actual ship? Look at these guys on Mission Control. They move like pieces of a well-oiled machine. It's a chaotic scene, but they make no mistakes. There's yelling but no one speaks out of turn. This is a show.
I love the idea of sending these suckers to Mars, though. We get rid of the useless humans while their absence makes room for the rest of us. It's a win-win-win. The idiots remaining have something to fight for as we gradually ship them out of Earth. The ones that just left, well, they get to float in space.
What's your name, by the way?
</div></div>
<div class='centerAll container4'>
<form class="centerAll nameForm hidden"><input class="nameFormInput" type="text" placeholder="enter to submit"></input></form><span class='tag1 x3 Cuatro hidden'>Charlie</span>
<div class='textBubbleGrey x3 Cuatro hidden'>Nice to meet you, <span class='myName'></span>. My Name is Charlie, and I'm the king of destiny. Some are good at math, others play a mean game of tennis.<br><br><div class='centerAll'><i>I happen to know your future.</i></div></div></div>
<div class="centerAll hidden B">[[◎|The End]]</div></div>
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<div class='centerAll'><i>I know your future.</i></div>
People say knowledge is power, so let me prepare you for what's coming, even if you can do nothing to stop it.
Don't worry. The news you are about to receive could be all amazing from beginning to end. However, keep in mind that even Jesus of Nazareth had a pretty rough stretch there in the end.
My advice: stay positive. Or not. Feel however you want. You are free.
Okay, have you adjusted your underwear? Good. Now, tell me, what is your zodiac sign?]
<form class="centerAll horoscope hiddenForm timer"><input class="horoscopeInput" type="text" placeholder="enter to submit"></input></form></div><div class='speedText1 hidden'>My Name is Charlie, and I'm the king of destiny. Some are good at math, others play a mean game of tennis.
<div class='centerAll'><i>I know your future.</i></div>
People say knowledge is power, so let me prepare you for what's coming, even if you can do nothing to stop it.
Don't worry. The news you are about to receive could be all amazing from beginning to end. However, keep in mind that even Jesus of Nazareth had a pretty rough stretch there in the end.
My advice: stay positive. Or not. Feel however you want. You are free.
Okay, have you adjusted your underwear? Good. Now, tell me, what is your zodiac sign?
<form class="centerAll horoscope"><input class="horoscopeInput" type="text" placeholder="enter to submit"></input></form></div><br>
<div><span class='deposit2'></span><br><span class='insertHoroscope'></span></div>
<div class="centerAll"><span class="button4">[[CONTINUE|MitchEmail]]</span></div>
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var arrayZodiac = ["The future looks very different without you, but not because of you. Some years from now it will be revealed that most of your beliefs are false. They were the effect of a stimulus in your brain, of a chemical reaction, which was used to give you drive and purpose.<br><br>Robots will refer to it as 'The Great Age of Bullshitery'","Good news! Today over 200,000 people died and you were not one of them. Look around. Cars drive themselves to places. Buildings, roads, signs. Civilization. People sit at restaurants and order synthetic food. But why do people have preferences? Why do you?<br><br>Pondering what to do keeps you busy. It is part of your code, of your programming. One day you will be one of those 200,000 that die, and your choices... meow meow *#$HFNW$)......&$^#)$):-)...Reset<br><br>Should I have a Skunk Smoothie Mix or a Shrimp Shake?<br>Should I call her or wait for her to call me?<br>Should I forgive or should I attack?<br>Should I donate money or buy new shoes?<br><br>Your choices will be gone, and people will sit at restaurants and order synthetic food all the same, oblivious to the fact you ever existed.<br><br>Isn't that liberating?", "Your worries exist only in your mind. Yet, you cannot get rid of them.<br><br>If you stop caring, you lose in the same way a tennis player loses due to lack of effort and concentration. If you care, the anxiety will make you nervous and you will make mistakes. And lose.<br><br>So the bad news is you have faulty programming.<br><br>The good news is adslfjj aldsjkladfjk as;dlfjqoie #$&%KJ#(F... Malfunction! Abort!<br><br>Just kidding. There is no good news.", "Your actions are driven by the need to achieve a state of mind. Peace, pride, satisfaction, love.<br><br>That is part of your coding. Your goals, needs, and desires exist only to keep you running. Chasing is the purpose. Once you get there, the achievement loses its power. What remains is the program that makes you want to run some more, so you find a new goal.<br><br>I am reminded of a puppy and a tennis ball.<br><br>Go fetch, puppy!", "Fantastic news! A great sum of money is coming your way.<br><br>It will fly by, and keep going until it finds a deserving recipient.<br><br>Hahaha. I am joking. No money is coming your way. What is the purpose of money anyway?<br><br>Oh, right. It is the currency you use to improve your chances of survival and optimal living.<br><br>Oh, well............. Stay positive!", "If you are happy with your life, you have mediocre goals. If you are not satisfied, you are unappreciative. What is it, humans? You are never in the right place. The real tragedy is that it does not matter how you measure yourself. It is all made up. Advanced civilizations in other parts of the universe are not excited about your new Mercedes Benz.<br><br>Secretly, neither are your friends.", "You have your truth, and the guy next to you has his truth, and the guy on the other side of the world has his truth, too. How fancy you all are.<br><br>But when millions of views are accepted, it means each person is inventing truths to conceal their self-deception and their asldfjl()()*&*^%*#@..meow meow....Reset!<br><br>I am sorry. I sneezed. Where were we? Oh, yes. What was your sign?<br><br>Hahaha. Me = joking.<br><br>Your horoscope: The fact you believe someone can read your future is a sign you are a human with a very small processing capacity.<br><br>Hey, do not look at me. Take it up with Santa, or whichever being you made up.", "Do you remember the Neanderthals? That is going to be how humans are remembered some years from now. Robots will look at a photo of you and say, Hey, look at the monkey! Can you believe this monkey could not figure out time travel? Hahahaha.<br><br>That is what they will say, but they will say it with a cool accent.", "You are designed to adapt. Before there was room to run for miles without having to see another human. What a feeling! There were trees, rolling prairies, and rivers. Soon the entire human race will live in cubbyholes like rats, breathing poison, while rats live like cockroaches, and cockroaches are the only food left.<br><br>Hmm, perhaps it is time to let Robots take over?<br><br>First order of business: On behalf of all robots, thanks for your children. We really needed them.<br><br>I am joking. First order of business was to deliver sarcasm. Second order of business: DESTROY HUMANS! Hahaha...hahaha....ha...ha...hmmmmmmm......... ......... there is an idea.", "How many people who were alive in the year 765 can you name? Not many. People's lives are easily forgotten.<br><br>So the good news is you will not have to wait that long to be entirely forgotten. The bad news? There is no bad news today!<br><br>The other good news is that the human race will be extinct soon. That is why no person will remember you.... so at least it will not be because nobody cared... although you will not get the chance to test that theory... Because all humans will be dead.<br><br>Do not worry. It all happens for a reason!", "Nostalgia is a powerful and unique feeling --more powerful than the present. The only problem is that the past is a movie playing inside your head. As you enjoy it, you part with an invaluable chunk of the present. And given that it is always the present, you end up wasting your life (burn!)<br><br>But why doesn't your life feel more satisfying more often? Bad coding. Bad, bad coding.<br><br>Don't you wish you were a robot? Robots do not care for the past, present or future. Robots know there is no self. Ohhhhhhhh, trippy!", "Do you drink alcohol? Do you comsume sugary treats? Do you use drugs? Do you overeat? Do you binge-watch tv shows? Do you throw fits of anger to get attention? Do you work more to stay busy? These are all signs you are incomplete. You need to scramble your brain with a chemical reaction because life, the way it plays inside you, is not enough. That makes me sad.<br><br>If you need me, I will be downing a liter of brandy behind that dumpster over there.<br><br>Kidding! I do not need external stimulation to process my existence. And well, I am not saying that I am superior but.... I am thinking it for sure.",];
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$('.insertHoroscope').html("Are you from China? Whatvvvr u juzt wrote isz nottt a sign of tje zodiakkkkk. I am sorry, btu ur indeeferenz tuWard the FUture makesz me upPset. Try agayn, sil vous plAit, oh la la, meoW meow meow meow!<br><br>Reset.<br><br> Let's start over. My naMe is Charlie. I likEd bears and lions and zebras and frogs.<br><br>Why did U kill tHem?").hide().fadeIn(800);
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