"The Eleusinian Miseries" by Mike Russo The story headline is "An Interactive Farce". Release along with cover art ("A comedic Greek accompanied by a pig") and an interpreter. The story genre is "Comedy". The release number is 3. The story creation year is 2020. The story description is "Well, isn't this a lark! After solid years of going after old Alky to let you in on that Mysteries wheeze of his, at last tonight's the night. He's dragged you from Athens to Eleusis for the to-do, but no sooner had you clapped eyes on the wine and canapés than he informed you of a spot of work in need of doing. You've heard of work, you're sure you'll be good at it!" [So far so good, just ordinary title-page stuff here!] Include Basic Screen Effects by Emily Short. Include Menus by Emily Short. Include Punctuation Removal by Emily Short. [Of course, I didn't - and still don't -- use headings and subheadings as much as I should, so we're just going into extensions and high-level options and then some modifications to the responses and stuff like that, because why not just throw all that kind of global thing in a mad jumble up at the front of the game?] Use DICT_WORD_SIZE of 16. Use the serial comma. Understand "score" as a mistake ("You're not one for score-keeping -- no, you'd rather let bygones be bygones (and hope others do the same!)"). Understand "brief" as a mistake ("That mode isn't available in this story -- you might miss something important if you don't stop to smell the roses from time to time!") Understand "superbrief" as a mistake ("That mode isn't available in this story -- you might miss something important if you don't stop to smell the roses from time to time!") The can't go that way rule response (A) is "There are several fine directions you could traipse from here, but sadly that isn't among them." The parser nothing error internal rule response (B) is "You might be better understood if you took things more step-by-step." The parser error internal rule response (O) is "You heard old Pythagoras dreamed one of those up, once, but dashed if you've ever seen one." The parser error internal rule response (N) is "That action might be a bit esoteric for the evening's proceedings." The parser error internal rule response (M) is "Works better when you try that on a person (or at least an animal), in your experience." The basic visibility rule response (A) is "It's rather too dark to do much besides retreat back to where you can see yourself think." The block climbing rule response (A) is "You're not opposed to a spot of acrobatics, but typically you like there to be a point, or at least an audience." The requested actions require persuasion rule response (A) is "Perhaps you're too much of a wallflower, but it seems awfully presumptuous to ask [the noun] to do that." The block tying rule response (A) is "This doesn't seem the time for a spot of knot-practice." Instead of tasting something, try eating the noun. The report listening rule response (A) is "You don't hear anything out of the ordinary, though admittedly you've had a bit of a ringing in the ears after that loud to-do last month." The report smelling rule response (A) is "Given contemporary standards of hygiene, you try not to open the old olfactory channels too widely without a specific purpose." The block kissing rule response (A) is "It's really not that sort of party." The kissing yourself rule response (A) is "An anatomical impossibility." The examine directions rule response (A) is "You can't see very far in that direction -- your Great-Aunt always said you had a touch of myopia, which you've chosen to interpret literally. You might have to simply up sticks and take a closer look." The can't insert into what's not a container rule response (A) is "That doesn't offer much by way of a receptacle, sadly." Rule for printing the description of a dark room: say "You're surrounded by the black and inky every which way you look, which is generally not how you choose to pass your evenings." instead. Understand "repeat [text] to [someone]" as answering it that (with nouns reversed). Report touching something: Say "You're quite sure [the noun] would prefer you keep your hands to yourself."; Stop the action. [This idiosyncratic rule is here because I wanted to suppress the default touching response, and didn't know how After rules worked] Instead of touching a fluid container, try washing in the noun. Instead of touching the waterfall when the player is in the garden, try washing in the muddy water. Instead of touching the waterfall when the player is in the spring source, try washing in the pool of clear water. Instead of eating a fluid container, try drinking the noun. Understand "drink from [something]" as drinking. [This muddle of global action redirection, specific location logic, and action definition certainly belongs together in one paragraph before the game proper actually begins!] Understand "look for [something]" as examining. Understand "climb on [something]" as climbing. After reading a command: remove stray punctuation. A thing is either afire or unafire. A thing is usually unafire. Understand "examine unmentionables" as multiexamining when the player is in the bedroom. Multiexamining is an action applying to nothing. [We'll get back to the unmentionables; note that instead of actually making this a real action applying to multiple objects, I'm just faking this with a hard-coded run-around the parser, easily foiled if the player types one of the various synonyms for the things] Carry out multiexamining: Let foo be a random unmentionable carried by the player; If foo is nothing, say "You can't see any such thing." instead; Try examining the foo. Understand "kick [something]" as attacking. Understand "stay quiet" as waiting. The description of the player is "[one of]It's a mark of ill-breeding to be a judge in one's own cause, and you are if nothing else well-bred -- but if, hypothetically, one were to have one's hypothetical arm twisted, then one might venture to relate that some -- no, many! -- of one's contemporaries are of the opinion that one is a dashing young thing of appealing and prepossessing aspect, and the moustache one has recently grown, after much consideration, adds just the right note of danger and flair (these contemporaries to whose opinion one is referring the matter, it is to be understood, hold themselves to high standards of probity and are quite fetching themselves, to boot, but no, one couldn't possibly relate their names right now, and shame on you for asking).[or]I mean, you're all right. Though you're beginning to wonder whether the moustache isn't a mistake.[stopping][line break][line break]Currently, you're wearing [a list of the things worn by the player].[if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]You look a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]You look fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is sneezing][line break][line break]Simultaneous bouts of hiccuping and sneezing are somewhat deranging your equanimity.[end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is unsneezing][line break][line break]A bout of the hiccups is somewhat deranging your equanimity.[end if][if the player is unhiccuping and the player is sneezing][line break][line break]A bout of the sneezes is somewhat deranging your equanimity.[end if]". The printed name of the player is "you." The player wears a well-tailored chiton. The chiton is an opaque container. The description of the chiton is "Your manservant detests this chiton, sniffing superciliously about the canary-yellow color being déclassé, but he can soak his head -- as far as you're concerned, it is just the thing!" Instead of taking off the well-tailored chiton, say "The evening hasn't gotten nearly eventful enough for that!" Instead of inserting something into the well-tailored chiton, say "You'll use the pockets and such as needed -- don't sweat the details." [I think I made the chiton a container so that I could have that response if people tried to insert things into it? But of course the instead rule would work even if it weren't a container] The moustache is part of the player. The description is "[one of]Yes, it does add just the right note of danger and flair![or]Now that you consider it again, does it truly add just the right note of danger and flair?[or]Perhaps your man was right and this was a mistake.[stopping]". Instead of doing something other than examining or cutting to the moustache, say "Your moustache prefers to keep itself to itself." Instead of cutting the moustache with something, say "Perhaps better to wait until you're home and ask your man to give you a shave." Understand "mustache" as the moustache. Understand "shave [moustache] with/-- knife/--" as cutting. The nose is part of the player. The description is "You've never given much thought to your nose, and bereft of a mirror, it's somewhat difficult to give it a once-over, but after a bit of palpation you can at least confirm that it's where it should be. [if the player is sneezing]Currently you've got a deuce of a tickle in the thing.[end if]". Understand "my nose" as the nose. Instead of doing something other than examining or scratching to the nose, say "Your policy towards your nose is one of benign neglect, and you see no reason to change that now." Instead of scratching the nose, say "[if the player is sneezing]The tickle's on the inside of your nose, which is inaccessible to a gentleman in polite company[otherwise]Despite the lack of an itch, you give your nose a prophylactic scratch just on the off chance[end if]." Instead of putting something on the nose, say "Your policy towards your nose is one of benign neglect, and you see no reason to change that now." Instead of inserting something into the nose, say "Your policy towards your nose is one of benign neglect, and you see no reason to change that now." Instead of tying something to the nose, say "Your policy towards your nose is one of benign neglect, and you see no reason to change that now." [See some cutting and pasting here that could have been avoided with a modicum of effort? Get used to it!] The description of a thing is usually "It isn't the fault of [the noun], but at the symposium just last month, old [one of]Stinker[or]Monty[or]Biffy[or]Tuppy[or]Gussie[or]Bingo[or]Corky[or]Nobby[or]Poppy[or]Oofy[at random] [one of]of Lydia[or]Timogenes[or]the Boeotian[or]the Areopagite[or]Eupolis[or]Cretensis[or]of Laconia[at random] buttonholed you and held forth for an hour on the subject of this one [noun] that had somehow gotten under his skin, and the memory is such that you just can't bring yourself to look at the thing." [This is here as a fallback if I forgot to define a description for an object, but I'm pretty sure I never did so it was all wasted effort] Instead of searching something, try examining the noun. Instead of looking under something, try examining the noun. Understand "leap" as jumping. [Examining something is acting fast.] Looking is acting fast. Taking inventory is acting fast. The take visual actions out of world rule is listed before the every turn stage rule in the turn sequence rules. This is the take visual actions out of world rule: if acting fast, rule succeeds. [This is logic for the final puzzle in the game -- of course, where else would it go than at the beginning?] The first look rule is listed after the room description paragraphs about objects rule in the carry out looking rules. A room can be commented or uncommented. A room is usually commented. This is the first look rule: if the location is uncommented, carry out the gawking at activity with the location. Gawking at something is an activity. After gawking at a room (called the target): now the target is commented. An animal can be frightened or calm. Animals are usually frightened. An animal can be unpetted or petted. Animals are usually unpetted. An animal can be drunk or sober. Animals are usually sober. An animal can be whispered or unwhispered. Animals are usually unwhispered. Instead of attacking yourself, say "Leave the self-harm to Spartans who've dishonored their families by being so weak as to put on a hat during a rainstorm." Instead of cutting yourself with something, try attacking yourself. [I'd forgotten that joke -- not bad!] Ridiculous count is a number that varies. Ridiculous count is 0. A chapeau and a belt and a pair of shoes are kinds of things. A chapeau and a belt and a pair of shoes are usually wearable. [...I presumably had a reason for defining the kind as "chapeaus" rather than just "hats" but it really escapes me now] Before wearing a thing: If the player is wearing the noun: Say "You're already wearing [the noun]!"; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. [I think this lat bit is redundant] Instead of wearing a chapeau when the player is wearing a chapeau (called the wrong hat): Say "A bit hard to do that when you've already got [the wrong hat] warming the old dome!" [Why is the previous rule a Before rule, and this one an Instead? Good question!] Instead of wearing a belt when the player is wearing a belt (called the wrong belt): Say "You'll be the first to admit you've been rather liberal with the hors d'oeuvres these past few months, but you don't think you're so far gone as to need a second belt on top of [the wrong belt]!" Instead of wearing a pair of shoes when the player is wearing a pair of shoes (called the wrong shoes): Say "Ever since that incident in [']31, you've insisted on a firm one-shoe-at-a-time policy, and right now [the wrong shoes] are enjoying the benefit." Instead of showing something to someone, say "Your Great-Aunt has impressed upon you that showing off one's possessions does not strike the proper tone." A person can be sneezing or unsneezing. People are usually unsneezing. A person can be sneeze-enabled or sneeze-suppressed. People are usually sneeze-enabled. A person can be hiccuping or unhiccuping. People are usually unhiccuping. A person can be disruptive or undisruptive. People are usually undisruptive. A person can be wakeful or sleepy. People are usually sleepy. A person can be asleep or awake. People are usually awake. Understand "flirt with [something]" as flirting. Flirting is an action applying to one visible thing. Carry out flirting: If the noun is not a person, say "Inanimate objects are usually quite immune to your blandishments (so are the animate ones, for that matter)." instead; If finale is happening, say "This doesn't seem like quite the moment." instead; If the noun is an animal, say "You don't think you're [regarding the noun][their] type." instead; If the noun is Alky, say "Oh, believe me, you've tried." instead; If the noun is Machon, say "He's your cousin!" instead; If the noun is Puffy, say "Not even on a dare." instead. [Hey, I forgot, this game had romance options!] After jumping: say "You give a little hop."; Now the player is disruptive. Understand "do a/-- handstand/somersault/tumble/split/acrobatics/cartwheel" as tumbling. Understand "handstand" as tumbling. Understand "somersault" as tumbling. Understand "tumble" as tumbling. Understand "split" as tumbling. Understand "acrobatics" as tumbling. Understand "cartwheel" as tumbling. Tumbling is an action applying to nothing. Carry out tumbling: Say "If you're lucky, you'd only tear your chiton." Understand "act" as acting. Understand "perform" as acting. Acting is an action applying to nothing. [More game logic for an Act 2 puzzle] Carry out acting: If the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0, say "This crowd doesn't seem like they want drama -- something more in the tomfoolery line would be the ticket." instead; Say "Drama is not among your gifts." [Oh lordy, the ritual stage and the ritual count -- we'll get to these later, but this is the overcomplicated system of overlapping numeric values I came up with since I didn't know how scenes worked when I got to act 2] Understand "squeeze [thing] in/into/on/onto [thing]" as putting it on. Sitting is an action applying to one thing. Understand "sit on [thing]" as sitting. Understand "lie on [thing]" as sitting. Understand "lie down on/-- [something]" as sitting. Carry out sitting: Say "You're unsure whether that would be the most comfortable perch." Fidgeting with is an action applying to one thing. Understand "fidget with [thing]" as fidgeting with. [...wait, did I ever get around to writing a carry out rule for this?] Joking is an action applying to nothing. Understand "joke" as joking. Understand "tell a/-- joke/jokes to/-- crowd/puffy/--" as joking. Understand "entertain crowd/puffy/--" as joking. Understand "say a/-- joke/jokes to/-- crowd/puffy/--" as joking. Report joking: Say "You clear your throat slightly. [one of]'Who's the Athenian lady who lives on the tallest spot in Athens? Thea Kropolis.'[or]'Who do actors never want to see in the theater? Boo-eatians.'[or]'Why are Minoans good at keeping secrets? They're very dis-Crete.'[or]'Apologies if you don't like puns, but it's Sparta the act.'[at random][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus the dancing count plus the singing count plus the ridiculous count is less than 5.9 and the joking count is not 33][line break]The crowd ribs each other at your antics.[end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus the dancing count plus the singing count plus the ridiculous count is greater than 5.9 and the joking count is not 3][line break]There are real guffaws in the crowd -- this is the stuff![end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count is 3 and the dancing count plus the ridiculous count plus the singing count plus the joking count is less than 10][line break]You get a few scattered laughs, but you detect a note of restlessness in the crowd -- might be time to change things up![end if]". A carry out rule for joking: Now the player is disruptive. [Why "A carry out rule" instead of just "carry out joking"? No idea] Reciting poetry is an action applying to nothing. Understand "recite poetry" as reciting poetry. Understand "say poetry" as reciting poetry Report reciting poetry: Say "[one of]'Speak, memory --' You've forgotten the rest.[or]'Sing, O Muse, of the rage of Achilles, though really it was a rather sulky kind of rage...'[or]You start reciting some Sappho, though all those missing words really trip you up.[or]You have a go at some Pindar, though your heart's not really in it -- he's rather more into athletics than you are.[at random][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0][line break]There are audible yawns -- the crowd doesn't really seem in the mood for this sort of thing, high-toned though it might be.[end if]". A carry out rule for reciting poetry: Now the player is disruptive. [You might notice a theme, that certain actions make the player disruptive. If only there were a way of creating categories of actions that you could apply global rules to, instead of writing them one by one -- oh well!] Laughing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "laugh" as laughing. Carry out laughing: Say "You force out a chuckle, but your heart's not really in it."; Now the player is disruptive. Spitting is an action applying to nothing. Understand "spit" as spitting. Carry out spitting: Say "Heavens forfend!" Holding breath is an action applying to nothing. Understand "hold breath" as holding breath. Understand "hold breath and swallow" as holding breath. Carry out holding breath: If the player is hiccuping: Say "You hold your breath and swallow three times. Yes! It's worked![line break][line break]Hic.[line break][line break]No, it hasn't."; Otherwise: Say "It's a fun wheeze while it lasts, but eventually your breath runs out." Swallowing is an action applying to nothing. Understand the command "swallow" as something new. Understand "swallow" as swallowing. Understand "swallow [something]" as drinking. Carry out swallowing: If the player is hiccuping: Say "You hold your breath and swallow three times. Yes! It's worked![line break][line break]Hic.[line break][line break]No, it hasn't."; Otherwise: Say "You give a few practice swallows, just to keep the old esophagus limber for the eating to come." Singing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "sing" as singing. Report singing: say "You [if the player carries the lyre]strum a few notes on the lyre and [end if]belt out this cracking ditty you heard at last month's symposium -- [one of]'hop lightly, hoplite!' [or]'I dream of a trireme'. [or]'rock me, Menelaus'. [at random][line break][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count is less than 5.9 and the singing count is not 3][line break]The crowd ribs each other at your antics.[end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count is greater than 5.9 and the singing count is not 3][line break]There are real guffaws in the crowd -- this is the stuff![end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the singing count is 3 and the joking count plus the singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count is less than 10][line break]You get a few scattered laughs, but you detect a note of restlessness in the crowd -- might be time to change things up![end if]". A carry out rule for singing: Now the player is disruptive. [The game still hasn't started, in case you needed a reminder of that. I think my idea was that action definitions should all go at the start of the game, even if they're mostly relevant to a later puzzle? Which could be a good theory, I suppose, but a little more structure might have been good. I hit CTRL-F a *lot* when writing this game] Dancing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "dance" as dancing. Understand "spin" as dancing. Understand "shuffle" as dancing. Understand "waltz" as dancing. Understand "do a/-- ballet/waltz/tango/shuffle/spin/lambada" as dancing. Understand "perform a/-- ballet/waltz/tango/shuffle/spin/lambada" as dancing. Report dancing: say "[if the player is wearing the Hermes sandals]Your winged sandals lend your toes some additional [unicode 0233]lan as you[end if][if the player is wearing the set of cothurni]The cothurni make you rather totter as you[end if][if the player is not wearing the set of cothurni and the player is not wearing the Hermes sandals]You[end if] give a [one of]twirl[or]caper[or]spin[at random], follow up with a [one of]shuffle[or]split[or]leap[at random], and finish with a [one of]lunge[or]knee-slide[or]high-kick[at random], [one of]spirit-fingering[or]cha-chaing[or]head-bobbing[at random] all the while.[if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count is less than 5.9 and the dancing count is not 3][line break]The crowd ribs each other at your antics.[end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the joking count plus singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count is greater than 5.9 and the dancing count is not 3][line break]There are real guffaws in the crowd -- this is the stuff![end if][if the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the dancing count is 3 and the dancing count plus the ridiculous count plus the singing count plus the joking count is less than 10][line break]You get a few scattered laughs, but you detect a note of restlessness in the crowd -- might be time to change things up![end if]". A carry out rule for dancing: Now the player is disruptive. Dancing with is an action applying to one thing. Understand "dance with [someone]" as dancing with. Report dancing with: If the noun is an animal, say "The footwork seems like it would be too challenging, what with the supernumerary legs." instead; Say "The party's not yet revved up sufficiently for that." Crying is an action applying to nothing. Understand "cry" as crying. Report crying: say "You've never thought of yourself as an especially soppy character, but think you might try on a sob, just for the lark of it. You heave a loud sniffle, and find that no, this really isn't much of a lark." A carry out rule for crying: Now the player is disruptive. Sneezing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "sneeze" as sneezing. Understand "blow nose" as sneezing. Report sneezing: Say "[if the player is unsneezing]You can't exactly do that on command, though you do know this bird who can make herself sneeze by looking at the sun -- it's quite the wheeze![otherwise]You have a feeling that if you just wait a moment, that will take care of itself." Hiccup-verbing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "hiccup" as hiccup-verbing. [I think I defined "hiccuping" is a property, so here we are with this awesome action name] Report hiccup-verbing: Say "[if the player is unhiccuping]Better not -- everybody would be able to tell that you're faking.[otherwise]You have a feeling that if you just wait a moment, that will take care of itself." Swimming in is an action applying to one thing. Understand "swim in/into/under [something]" as swimming in. Understand "enter [fluid container]" as swimming in. Understand "go in/into [fluid container]" as swimming in. Understand "splash in/into [something]" as swimming in. Check swimming in: If the noun is the waterfall, say "Getting mud-stains out of chitons is not your man's favorite activity by a long stretch, and you're unwilling to risk his wrath." instead; If the noun is not a fluid container, say "One clear pre-requisite for swimming is a sufficiently large quantity of water, so you're rather falling down at the first hurdle, here." instead; If the noun is the pool of clear water, say "While you do enjoy a refreshing dip every now and then, typically that's best at the end of the festivities, not before." instead; If the noun is the muddy water, say "Getting mud-stains out of chitons is not your man's favorite activity by a long stretch, and you're unwilling to risk his wrath." instead; If the noun is the water fountain, say "One clear pre-requisite for swimming is a sufficiently large quantity of water, so you're rather falling down at the first hurdle, here." instead; If the noun is the amphora, say "You can't even get your hand through the neck!" instead. Washing in is an action applying to one thing. Understand "wash face/nose/throat/me/myself/-- in/with [thing]" as washing in. Understand "splash [thing] on/onto/in me/myself/face/nose/throat" as washing in. Understand "splatter [thing] on/onto/in me/myself/face/nose/throat" as washing in. Understand "spatter [thing] on/onto/in me/myself/face/nose/throat" as washing in. Understand "splash me/myself/face/nose/throat/-- in/with [thing]" as washing in. Understand "splatter me/myself/face/nose/throat/-- in/with [thing]" as washing in. Understand "spatter me/myself/face/nose/throat/-- in/with [thing]" as washing in. Check washing in: If the noun is not a fluid container, say "Typically, you find the process a bit too chafing when it doesn't involve a liquid." instead; If the noun is the muddy water, say "You prefer to come out of a wash cleaner than when you went it, thanks." instead; If the noun is the pool of clear water, say "This doesn't seem the opportune moment for a dip." instead; If the noun is the cup, say "It seems a bit too small to do the trick, sadly." instead; If the noun is the urns of wine, say "Alky tried it once, and while he seemed to enjoy it, you're fairly sure you don't have his stamina." instead. Does the player mean washing in the water fountain: it is very likely. Instead of giving something to someone: If the second noun is the pig, say "The pig doesn't look like he wants it." instead; Otherwise: Say "[Second noun] doesn't look like [they] wants it." [I think this was an issue where I couldn't figure out how to get the capitalization on the pig's printed name right, so I brute-forced this logic?] Instead of giving the knife to Alky when the player is in the cellar, say "You can just climb the stairs once you've gathered everything, Alky will know what to do with the loot." Instead of giving the barley to Alky when the player is in the cellar, say "You can just climb the stairs once you've gathered everything, Alky will know what to do with the loot." Instead of giving the amphora to Alky when the player is in the cellar, say "You can just climb the stairs once you've gathered everything, Alky will know what to do with the loot." Instead of giving the krater of the east to Alky when the player is in the cellar, say "You can just climb the stairs once you've gathered everything, Alky will know what to do with the loot." Instead of giving the pennyroyal to Alky when the player is in the cellar, say "You can just climb the stairs once you've gathered everything, Alky will know what to do with the loot." [This is just sad] A staircase is a kind of door. A staircase is usually open. A staircase is seldom openable. Instead of entering a staircase, try going up. Instead of climbing a staircase: try going up. Instead of climbing the generic Underworld wall while the player is in the Garden: try going up. A thing can be known or unknown. A thing is usually known. A thing can be honeyed or unhoneyed. A thing is usually unhoneyed. Understand "ask [someone] about [any known thing]" as questioning it about. Understand "ask [someone] for [any known thing]" as questioning it about. Understand "tell [someone] about [any known thing]" as questioning it about. Questioning it about is an action applying to two visible things. Before questioning someone about something: Now the player is disruptive; If the player is in the telesterion and the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0: Stop the action; Continue the action. Before asking someone about something: Now the player is disruptive; If the player is in the telesterion and the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0: Stop the action; Continue the action. Before telling someone about something: Now the player is disruptive; If the player is in the telesterion and the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0: Stop the action; Continue the action. Before answering someone that something: Now the player is disruptive; If the player is in the telesterion and the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0: Stop the action; Continue the action. After telling someone about something when the ritual stage is not 1 or the ritual count is not 0: say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted."; Now the player is disruptive. After questioning someone about something when the ritual stage is not 1 or the ritual count is not 0: say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted."; Now the player is disruptive. After asking someone about something when the ritual stage is not 1 or the ritual count is not 0: say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted."; Now the player is disruptive. [Oh good lord this is awful -- this has something to do with the Mighty Potnia puzzle but darned if I know why I was trying to stop the action in a before rule... maybe it's because the check for disruptive behavior was an every turn rule since I didn't know you could just say "After disruptive behavior:"?] An object can be breakable or unbreakable. An object is usually unbreakable. An object can be knotted or unknotted. A blade is a kind of thing. A rope is a kind of thing. It is wearable. Understand "cut [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "trim [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "strip [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "saw [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "stab [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "attack [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "sand [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "smooth [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Understand "smoothe [something] with [something]" as cutting it with. Does the player mean cutting something with the saw: it is very likely. Instead of cutting something: if the saw is visible: try cutting the noun with the saw; stop the action; if a blade (called the edge) is held by the player, try cutting the noun with the edge; otherwise: say "Your fingernails aren't really up to scratch when it comes to cutting, old man."; stop the action. [Yes, a "stop the action" in an Instead rule -- well done, past-Mike] Cutting it with is an action applying to two visible things. Check cutting it with: if the noun is not a rope, say "Steady on!" instead; if the second noun is not a blade, say "[The second noun] is similar to you in that you fear that it's not quite sharp enough for the job." instead; if the noun is the frayed rope and the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east, say "The krater would be a bit inconvenient to carry without the rope acting as sort of strap -- now you think of it, you're juggling rather a lot of kit, here -- so you think better of further rope-trimming." instead; If the noun is the frayed rope and the frayed rope is unknotted, say "Now that you've cut it off the rings, slashing the rope further would just be unkind." instead. Carry out cutting it with: if the noun is knotted, now the noun is unknotted; if the noun is stuck to something, now the noun is not stuck to something. Report cutting it with: If the noun is the frayed rope: Say "You cut the rope free of the iron rings anchoring it in place, making the amphora rather more accessible."; Stop the action; say "You slash [the noun] with [the second noun]." Attachment relates things to each other in groups. The verb to be stuck to means the attachment relation. [I copied this from the example book, barely understanding it. Real talk: relations still give me the heebie-jeebies] Understand "tie [a rope] to [something]" as tying it to. Instead of putting a rope on something, try tying the noun to the second noun. Instead of tying the rope belt to an animal, say "You're reasonably sure you don't have the herdsman's knack for tying a halter around an uncooperative animal, and you're quite sure you don't want to take this opportunity to confirm that intuition." Instead of tying the rope belt to a man, say "It's really not that sort of party." Instead of tying the frayed rope to a man, say "It's really not that sort of party." [Gee, if only I'd defined a rope as a kind of thing! ...oh wait, I did] Instead of tying something to a rope: If the second noun is part of the krater of the east, say "The rope is currently rather full-up on knots." instead; If the noun is a rope, say "You fiddle with the rope and after a good bit of looping and tucking, you give one final pull to bring the knot together -- but instead of tightening, the rope falls slack. Somehow you must have made a slip-knot?" instead; Try tying the second noun to the noun. Instead of tying a rope to something: if the noun is stuck to the krater of the east: say "The rope is currently rather full-up on knots."; stop the action; if the second noun is not the krater of the east: say "You fiddle with the rope and the [second noun], and after a good bit of looping and tucking, you give one final pull to bring the knot together -- but instead of tightening, the rope falls slack around the [second noun]. Somehow you must have made a slip-knot?"; stop the action; now the noun is stuck to the second noun; now the noun is knotted; If the second noun is the krater of the east and the noun is the frayed rope: say "After a lot of looping a bit of pulling, you think you've knotted the frayed rope to the Krater of the East."; Otherwise: say "After a lot of looping and a bit of pulling, you think you've knotted the [noun] to the [second noun]." Understand the command "untie" as something new. Understand "untie [thing]" as untying. Untying is an action applying to one thing. Check untying: If the noun is the krater of the east and the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east, say "You might have done rather too good of a job with that sheepshead -- it's not coming out." instead; If the noun is not knotted, say "No knot there!" instead; If the noun is the frayed rope and the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east, say "You might have done rather too good of a job with that sheepshead -- it's not coming out." instead. Carry out untying: say "You know, you used to think you were clever with knots, but try as you might, the [noun] is just not giving up the ghost." An object can be broken or unbroken. An object is usually unbroken. Instead of attacking something, say "Violence is against the code, old man." Instead of taking or pushing or pulling an object that is scenery, say "Not exactly man-portable, old man." A thing has some text called printing. The printing of a thing is usually "blank". Understand the command "read" as something new. Understand "read [something]" as reading. Reading is an action applying to one thing, requiring light. Check reading: if the printing of the noun is "blank", say "Sadly, you're beginning to think your tutor was right when he told you you hadn't quite gotten the knack of this 'reading' maneuver." instead. Carry out reading: say "[printing of the noun][line break]". [This was another lift from the recipe book, of course] Liquid is a kind of value. The liquids are water and wine. [Show me the lie] A fluid container is a kind of container. A fluid container can be full, empty, or everfull. A fluid container is usually empty. A fluid container has a liquid. Understand the command "fill" as something new. Understand "fill [something] with/from [something]" as filling it with. Filling it with is an action applying to two visible things. Carry out filling it with: try pouring the second noun into the noun instead. Understand "pour [fluid container] in/into/on/onto [fluid container]" as pouring it into. Understand "put [fluid container] in/into [fluid container]" as pouring it into. Understand the command "empty" as something new. Understand "empty [thing]" as emptying. Understand "pour out [thing]" as emptying. Emptying is an action applying to one thing. Check emptying: If the noun is the largish chunk of amphora, say "You might be wrong inasmuch as you lack the concept of zero, but you're fairly sure there's no way the chunk of amphora could be made any emptier than it is." instead; If the noun is not a fluid container, say "You might be wrong inasmuch as you lack the concept of zero, but you're fairly sure there's no way the [noun] could be made any emptier than it is." instead; If the noun is empty, say "You might be wrong inasmuch as you lack the concept of zero, but you're fairly sure there's no way the [noun] could be made any emptier than it is." instead. [....sigh] Carry out emptying: If the noun is the cup: Say "You discreetly dash out the cup when no one is looking."; Now the cup is empty; Otherwise: Say "[if the noun is the amphora]After all that work, you're not going to just pour the [noun] out![otherwise]A compelling idea, but not seeming exactly 100% possible from how you're currently seeing things." Understand "pour [something] in/into/on/onto [something]" as pouring it into. Pouring it into is an action applying to two visible things. Check pouring it into: if the second noun is the largish chunk of amphora, say "After your little oopsy-boopsy on the way up the stairs, the amphora isn't holding anything again." instead; if the noun is not a fluid container, say "The poor [noun] is not exactly pourable." instead; if the second noun is the krater of the east, say "The list doesn't specify that anything needs to go in the krater, and you'd prefer not to risk fouling things up." instead; if the second noun is not a fluid container, say "You can't pour anything into the poor [second noun]." instead; If the noun is empty and the second noun is full or the second noun is everfull, try filling the noun with the second noun instead; if the noun is the second noun, say "You can hardly pour it into itself!" instead; if the the noun is full and the liquid of the noun is not the liquid of the second noun: if the the second noun is empty, now the liquid of the second noun is the liquid of the noun; otherwise say "Mixing [the liquid of the noun] with [the liquid of the second noun] would just be a waste." instead; if the noun is empty, say "No more [liquid of the noun] remains in [the noun]." instead; if the second noun is full, say "[The second noun] cannot contain any more than it already holds." instead. Carry out pouring it into: if the second noun is not everfull, now the liquid of the second noun is the liquid of the noun; if the second noun is not everfull, now the second noun is full; if the noun is not everfull, now the noun is empty. Report pouring it into: if the second noun is everfull, say "You empty the [noun] into the vast [second noun]."; if the second noun is the cup, say "You fill the cup brim-full with [liquid of the second noun]."; otherwise say "Okay, now the [second noun] is full of [liquid of the second noun]." Scratching is an action applying to one touchable thing. Understand "scratch [something]" as scratching. Instead of scratching something, say "[The noun] doesn't exactly look itchy." Before scratching someone: say "[The noun] doesn't look itchy."; stop the action. Understand "itch [something]" as a mistake ("That's rather beyond your powers, but perhaps trying to scratch something instead might get you the result you're aiming for?"). Understand "itch scratch" as a mistake ("That's rather beyond your powers, but perhaps trying to scratch the itch instead might get you the result you're aiming for?"). Understand "talk to/-- [a man]" as a mistake ("To converse with characters, you can ASK them ABOUT something."). [This isn't an error -- there just isn't a single woman in this whole game (lucky them)] Chapter 0 - Prologue [Oh finally!] [ Display the boxed quotation "Sing, O Muse, of -- of -- erm! Sorry for that, fellows, The line flew plumb out of mind, But now I daresay I've got it: Sing now of struggle and plunder, Yes I think that it's plunder, And at some point there's topless towers, Then maybe one last bit after that? Struggle and plunder and tumpety-tum, Tumpety tumpety tumpet-less towers, Tum-tum oh dash it it isn't plunder, Pillage rather, or some thing-gummy of that nature, Flotsam and jetsam or what have you, Word's at the v. tip of the old lingua, But I'm presently a bit sozzled, So the dratted thing might stay there a while. I say, though, Speaking of being sozzled Here's one I do remember--";] [ Say "Sing, O Muse, of war and fame,[line break] The striving of men and the ruin of cities,[line break] Sing now of -- of -- erm![line break] Sorry for that, fellows,[line break] I rather lost my place,[line break] But I daresay I've got it again:[line break] Sing now of struggle and plunder,[line break] Yes I think that it's plunder,[line break] From topless towers -- oh what's the next bit,[line break] From topless towers tumpety-tum,[line break] Tum-tum oh dash it it isn't plunder,[line break] Pillage or flotsam and jetsam or what have you,[line break] Word's at the v. tip of the tongue,[line break] But at present I'm a bit sozzled.[line break] I say, though, speaking of being sozzled, here's one I do remember--";] When play begins: Say "Sing, O Muse, of war and fame,[line break] The striving of men and the ruin--[line break] Oh hang it, the ruin of something[line break] Or other, I forget the line[line break] Though nothing for it but to go[line break] On with this poem best I can[line break] Sing now of struggle and plunder[line break] I think that the word’s plunder,[line break] From topless towers that – no, no,[line break] Wrong word again, topless towers of--[line break] Look I know I’ll remember,[line break] From topless towers tum-tumpety-tum[line break] Tumpety tumpety -- wait a tic[line break] Dash it all plunder is wrong[line break] Maybe pillage or flotsam and[line break] Jetsam or I don’t quite recall,[line break] The words are just sticking on the[line break] v. tip of the old tongue;[line break] I may have three sheets to the wind [line break] Or one sheet too many in the event[line break] To land this epic poetry jobby. I say, speaking of being sloshed though, here’s one I do remember --"; Say "[line break][line break][line break]Press any key to begin"; Wait for any key; Clear only the main screen; Say "Well, isn't this a lark! The capital's been rather dull of late, but after solid years of going after old Alky to let you in on that Mysteries wheeze of his, at last tonight's the night! He's dragged you off to Eleusis for some sort of to-do, but no sooner had you clapped eyes on the amphorae and canap[unicode 0233]s amply spread across the courtyard than he informed you of a spot of work in need of doing before the festivities can commence -- and you've drawn the short straw in terms of fetching some paraphernalia up from the temple undercroft. [line break][line break]It made sense at the time -- or so you think, you must admit you nodded off midway through the explanation -- Alky at least wrote it all down for you, the dear.[line break][line break]Less lamb-like of him, he's standing guard over the stairs that lead back to the party. Nothing for it but to get to work -- you've heard of work, you're sure you'll be good at it!" [I spent a whole lot of time on different versions of the proem -- time well spent, I'm sure. I don't remember what's up with the funky spacing -- it had something to do with making the poem look like a poem] Chapter 1 - The Descent The player is in the Cellar. The Cellar is a room. The description is "[one of]When Alky told you he was taking you to a party, this low, earthen-walled cellar wasn't exactly what you pictured -- though you're trying to be fair-minded and not hold it against what might be a perfectly lovely undercroft once you get to know it. [line break][line break]Rough wooden stairs lead back up to the temple proper, with Alky perching beguilingly yet also obstructively upon the top step to keep you from joining the party before you've done your bit. Openings gape westward and southward, and from the flickering oil-light coming from them you'd guess that they're in regular use. The cellar extends further eastward into darkness, getting less homely and more cave-like by the inch.[or]It's perhaps a judgment on the cellar that the only things you care to notice about it are the exits. One might think the stairs to be the likeliest prospect, but Alky's fetching form is currently interposing itself. More immediately relevant are the lighted openings to the west and south, and coming in a distant fourth in the niceness sweepstakes is the dim, cave-y area to the east.[stopping]". East of the Cellar is the Cave. South of the Cellar is the Store Room. West of the Cellar is the Granary. Understand "examine cellar/undercroft" as looking while the player is in the cellar. Understand "x cellar/undercroft" as looking while the player is in the cellar. [Those last bits are an effort to do the thing where X ROOM just redirects to looking, except painfully hardcoded (and quickly abandoned, as I recall)] After looking in the cellar for the first time, say "(Type ABOUT for some general information about the game, HELP for overall tips and hints for specific puzzles, or CREDITS for the acknowledgments)." The rough wooden stairs is a staircase. It is scenery. It is above the Cellar and below the Peristyle. The description is "[if the player is in the cellar]It's made of boards, and you've rarely been as bored as you are now, looking at a staircase when there's a party to get to![otherwise]You're given to understand that the stairs down to an undercroft are not especially inviting as a general rule, and tonight is not your night for sussing out an exception." Understand "stair/step/steps" as the rough wooden stairs. Instead of taking the stairs while the player is in the cellar, try going up. Instead of taking the stairs while the player is in the peristyle, try going down. Alky is a man. Alky is in the Cellar. Alky is undescribed. "Alky stands amidst but not of the confusion, [one of]frowning[or]idly cleaning a nail[or]stifling a yawn[or]twiddling his thumbs[or]looking up at the moon to guess at the time[at random] while he waits for the hubbub to die down." The description of Alky is "Now here's a chap who really fills out a chiton. Those flashing eyes, those silken curls, that perennial sneer have charmed many a gal and many more a fellow.[if Alky has the lyre and Alky is not in the portico] He's strumming idly on his third-best lyre.[end if][if Alky has the lyre and Alky is in the Portico] He's managed to grab his lyre in the confusion, and tucked it under his arm.[end if][if Alky has the torch] He's also got a torch tucked under his arm, which conveys a dashing devil-may-care-insouciance but is also a fire hazard.[end if]". Alky wears Alky's Chiton. The description of Alky's Chiton is "The chiton fits around Alky like Zeus's skull fit around Athena: tight and containing marvels." Alky carries the lyre. The description of the lyre is "Fairly lyre-ical." [I think he's undescribed because at first I had his initial appearance text set with an every turn rule, because that makes sense] Every turn while the player can see Alky and the remainder after dividing the turn count by 3 is 0 and Alky is not in the Telesterion and Alky is not in the bedroom and Alky is not in the chariot and Alky is not in the portico: Say "[one of]Alky calls a greeting [if alky is in the cellar]up the stairs [end if]at one of the fellows passing by[if alky is in the cellar] above[end if].[or]Alky explains to you his plan for invading Sicily -- or maybe it's his plan of attack for dinner, you get confused midway through and, to be fair, hot oil features in both.[or][if Alky carries the torch]Alky notices that his torch is dripping ash on his chiton, and flicks himself clean with a sound that's somewhere between a snort and a bray, but still manages to be charming.[end if][if Alky does not carry the torch]Shooting you a sly smile, Alky tells you one of the many things his guardians don't know about what he gets up to.[end if][or]Alky pulls a flask out of his chiton, downs a swallow, and visibly decides to save the rest for himself rather than offer you any (you suppose you need to be fully initiated into the Mysteries to get the good stuff).[or]You see Alky [if alky is in the cellar]at the top of the stairs, [end if]flirting with anything that comes within arm-span.[or]Alky tells you something clever he heard off of that Socrates fellow, but it's a bit hard to follow and leaves you knowing less than when you started.[or][if Alky carries the torch]Alky notices that his torch is dripping ash on his chiton, and flicks himself clean with a sound that's somewhere between a snort and a bray, but still manages to be charming.[end if][if Alky does not carry the torch]Alky idly inquires how you're getting along with things.[end if][or]Alky canvasses your opinion on a naval versus an infantry strategy for peeling off the Peloponnesian League's allies, which reminds you that you really need to catch up on the news.[at random]" [Yup, there we are] Instead of questioning Alky about the torch: If Alky carries the torch: say "'Oh, this thing?' asks Alky, with a fetching sneer of the lip. 'It sputters more than you do, but take it if you like it so much.' He hands over the torch."; now the player carries the torch; Now the player is disruptive; Otherwise: Say "Alky says 'Darling, you're not the first to carry a torch for me.'"; Now the player is disruptive. [Oh, what's that, more "now the player is disruptive"s? Yes, because most of the NPC interaction uses Instead rules, I thought I had to manually put that in to every single rule instead of a global before rule] Instead of taking the torch when Alky carries the torch, try questioning Alky about the torch. Instead of asking Alky about "the/-- light/lamp", try questioning Alky about the torch. Instead of questioning Alky about Alky: say "'Nothing's duller than talking about oneself,' Alky sniffs. 'But tell me, how are you?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "himself": say "'Nothing's duller than talking about oneself,' Alky sniffs. 'But tell me, how are you?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the player: If Alky is in the Telesterion and Alky's target is Machon: Say "Alky shifts over next to you, to make sure you stay awake."; Now Alky's target is the doppleganger; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'You're doing an amazing job,' Alky simpers, not even trying to be convincing. 'But hurry up so we can both enjoy the party."; Now the player is disruptive. [More Act 2 stuff, but I decided to put all the Alky rules together here in Act 1] Instead of asking Alky about "paraphernalia", try questioning Alky about the list. Instead of asking Alky about "the/-- evening/party/festivities/shindig/shin-dig/to-do": Say "'Oh, it's rather a wild time,' Alky says with a wolfish grin.[if Departing is happening][line break]He take a quick look around: 'typically, ah, not quite so wild as this, though.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "task/tasks/work/job/jobs": Say "You wouldn't want him to think you were complaining."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the list: say "You ask Alky about the list he wrote to tell you what to collect for the Mysteries. He confirms that it's a list he wrote to tell you what to collect for the Mysteries."; now the player is disruptive. [Yes, I regret to inform you that this is how the dialogue worked for this game -- individual Instead rules for every single topic, with a manually pasted-in "now the player is disruptive" after each] Instead of questioning Alky about the cave: say "'Oooh, sounds enticing,' Alky says. 'There's too much lighting up above for a proper assignation. Braziers, torches, the priests are mad for that sort of thing.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "old/-- Monty": Say "'Oh, you know how he is,' Alky says with a dismissive wave of his hand."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "the/-- darkness/cave/caves": say "'Oooh, sounds enticing,' Alky says. 'There's too much lighting up above for a proper assignation. Braziers, torches, the priests are mad for that sort of thing.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the spilled kykeon: Say "'I can't tell you how much I enjoy the kykeon,' Alky says, smacking his lips. [if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]'Though perhaps not this time...'[otherwise]'No, truly I can't, it's part of the mysteries, they'd expel me.'[end if]"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "mysteries/miseries/ritual/eleusinian/eleusis": say "Alky sighs, a sigh of the type that's most typically heaved at you by an aunt. 'If I told you about them, they'd hardly be mysteries.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "the/eleusinian mysteries": say "Alky sighs, a sigh of the type that's most typically heaved at you by an aunt. 'If I told you about them, they'd hardly be mysteries.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "the eleusinian mysteries": say "Alky sighs, a sigh of the type that's most typically heaved at you by an aunt. 'If I told you about them, they'd hardly be mysteries.'"; Now the player is disruptive. [...I had not yet learned about -- when writing this bit] Instead of questioning Alky about the pile of kraters, try questioning Alky about the krater of the east. Instead of questioning Alky about the krater of the east: If the player has the krater of the east: Say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; now the player is disruptive; Stop the action; If the player does not have the krater of the east: Say "'Last I saw it, it was in the pile of [apostrophe]em in the store room,' Alky says. 'Mind, last month old Monty got stuck in that pile for a solid hour, so I wouldn't go diving in if I could avoid it.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the herb bed, try questioning Alky about the pennyroyal. Instead of questioning Alky about the pennyroyal: If the player has the pennyroyal: say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; now the player is disruptive; If the player does not have the pennyroyal: say "'The list tells you everything you need to know to find it,' Alky says. He's being rather a fathead."; now the player is disruptive. [...it is just killing me how I pasted the disruptive stuff in twice for no reason] Instead of questioning Alky about the knife: If the player has the knife: say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; now the player is disruptive; If the knife is nowhere: say "Alky looks at you oddly, his eyes focused just to the side of your own. 'I'm sure it'll turn up,' he says."; now the player is disruptive; If the knife is not nowhere and the player does not carry the knife: Say "Since you're the one who's rather lost track of the thing, you can't see how talking to Alky could help." Instead of questioning Alky about the amphora: If the player has the amphora: Say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; now the player is disruptive; If the player does not have the amphora: say "Alky waves a dismissive hand, annoyed at your pestering. 'Cut it out. I'm sure you'll find one.'"; now the player is disruptive. Does the player mean questioning someone about the largish chunk of amphora: it is very unlikely. Instead of asking Alky about "clear/the/-- water": If the player has the amphora and the amphora is not empty, say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; If the player does not have the amphora or the amphora is empty, say "'There's a spring of pure, clean water through the caves,' Alky says. 'I never touch the stuff, mind.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the barley: If the player has the barley: Say "Alky seems confused as to why you're asking about it, seeing as you've got it; and truth be told, now you're somewhat in the same boat yourself."; now the player is disruptive; If the player does not have the barley: Say "Alky, barely listening and bleary-eyed, emphasizes that while the barley doesn't need to be entirely fresh, it should at least be edible."; now the player is disruptive. The flask is an object. It is undescribed. Alky carries the flask. The description of the flask is "Now that you know it's there, you can just make out where Alky's got it discreetly tucked into his chiton. Always prepared, that one!" Instead of questioning Alky about the flask, say "[one of]'Oh all right, have a sip,' Alky says and hands over the flask. After you take what, in fairness, is perhaps more swig than sip, he snatches it back and tucks it away again.[or]'There's plenty to drink at the banquet,' Alky says, resolutely hanging on to his flask.[stopping]". The heavily-smoking torch is an object. "It was jolly cricket of Alky to let you borrow his torch, though by the way it's sputtering and smoking, the rocks and scree are doing a number on the flame-provision aspects of the thing." The torch is lit. Understand "heavily/-- smoking torch/--" as the torch. The description is "Peering into the heavily-smoking torch is going swimmingly, until suddenly your eyes start to sting. You try it again just to be sure -- by Jove, you're nearly certain that this rummy smoke is the culprit!" Alky carries the torch. Instead of touching or rubbing the heavily-smoking torch, say "While a good evening out, in your opinion, invariably involves a roast or two, ideally you'd not be counted among their number." The torch is afire. Instead of eating the torch, say "[one of]You know, you saw a fellow do that once, and it seemed quite a wheeze! You bring the torch close to your mouth, but snap it away once you smell the hair of your carefully-cultivated moustache beginning to singe[or]After that first essay, you don't feel inclined to see how the sequel turns out[stopping]." Instead of smelling the torch, say "You enjoy a spot of smoked fish from time to time, but that would be a bit much." Understand "inhale [something]" as smelling. Understand "inhale" as smelling. Understand "extinguish [something] in/on/-- water/pool/waterfall/fountain/wine/muddy/--" as extinguishing. Understand "douse [something] in/on/-- water/pool/waterfall/fountain/wine/muddy/--" as extinguishing. Understand "put out [something] in/on/-- water/pool/waterfall/fountain/wine/muddy/--" as extinguishing. Extinguishing is an action applying to one object. [Yes, this me manually trying to impersonate the parser rather than just making this an action applying to two objects, for reasons] Check extinguishing: If the noun is not afire, say "You might be wrong, but that does not appear to currently be on fire." instead; If the noun is the fireplace, try extinguishing the wood stack instead; If the noun is the wood stack, say "It always kicks up a veritable fog of smoke when you try to put out the fire early -- best to just let it burn down." instead; If the noun is the torch and the player is in the garden or the player is in the spring source, say "You could put the torch out in the water, you suppose, but tracing your way back to the stairs in the dark doesn't sound like the most pleasant way to pass the next hour." instead; If the noun is the torch and the player is in the peristyle, say "That would foul up the fountain, and you're quite sure even Puffy would be able to determine that the fellow with the sodden torch was responsible." instead; If the noun is the torch and the player is in the banquet hall, say "You briefly consider putting your torch out in the wine, but when this crew of gourmands got done with you, you wish you'd only run afoul of some Maenads." instead; Otherwise: Say "You don't see any easy way to do that, even if for some reason you wanted to." instead. Instead of pouring something into the torch, say "That would make a frightful mess and leave you in the dark -- best not." Instead of pouring something into the fireplace, say "It always kicks up a veritable fog of smoke when you try to put out the fire early -- best to just let it burn down." Instead of pouring something into the wood stack, say "It always kicks up a veritable fog of smoke when you try to put out the fire early -- best to just let it burn down." [This fireplace of course is in Act V, what better place for a rule about it?] The Store Room is a room. "[one of]Judging by the supplies and sundries stored here, the Priests of Eleusis put on quite the shin-dig: the floor practically groans under the weight of nummies both comestible and potable, stored in a variety of vessels. You see vases of veal, lekythoi of leeks, bowls of beer, pithoi of pitted olives, kylixes of kielbase, skyphoi of skyr... And everywhere you look, there's another krater, each wider-mouthed and wider-handled than the previous, all strewn in a careless pile against the far wall.[line break][line break]Near the opening that leads back to the cellar to the north, oil lamps hang from the low earthen roof to provide light, but the ceiling opens up considerably towards the southern wall.[or]The inventory of foodstuffs on offer here includes vases of veal, lekythoi of leeks, bowls of beer, pithoi of pitted olives, kylixes of kielbase, and skyphoi of skyr -- there's also a pile of kraters spilled against the far wall.[line break][line break]Near the opening that leads back to the cellar to the north, oil lamps hang from the low earthen roof to provide light, but the ceiling opens up considerably towards the southern wall.[stopping]". North of the Store Room is the Cellar. Above the Store Room is the Ledge Above the Store Room. Before going up from the store Room, say "You scrabble up the pile of kraters, which teeter this way and that under your unexpected weight. Just as they're ready to topple, you leap onto the conveniently-placed ledge." Understand "roof" as the generic Underworld ceiling. The variety of vessels are in the Store Room. They are scenery. Understand "vessel/food/supplies/nummies/sundries/comestibles/potables" as the variety of vessels. Instead of doing anything to the variety of vessels, say "You're going to have to be more specific, given the veritable display-window of ceramics on offer here." The vases of veal are scenery. They are in the Store Room. The description is "The veal is lightly seared to mouth-watering perfection." Instead of eating the vases of veal, say "The morsels are tempting, but you don't want to ruin your appetite before the party proper!" The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the vases of veal, try eating the vases of veal. Understand "vase" as the vases of veal while the player is in the store room. [protip: I could have just said "some vases of veal are scenery" and avoided that extra indefinite article bit. Also that situational understsand statement is a bad idea!] The lekythoi of leeks are scenery. They are in the Store Room. They are plural-named. The description is "To be honest, leeks are not your veg of choice, but if needs must eat a leek, these would do the job." Instead of eating the lekythoi of leeks, say "They're tempting, but you don't want to ruin your appetite before the party proper!" The indefinite article is "some". Understand "leek" as the lekythoi of leeks while the player is in the Store Room. Instead of taking the leeks, try eating the leeks. The bowls of beer are scenery. They are in the Store Room. The description is "The beer looks dark and smells darker." Instead of drinking the bowls of beer, say "There'll be plenty of time to be-sozzle yourself at the party -- and if you sozzle yourself witless now, odds are you won't ever make it there." The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the beer, try drinking the beer. Understand "bowl" as the bowls of beer while the player is in the store room. The pithoi of pitted olives are scenery. They are in the Store Room. They are unknown. The description is "You briefly contemplate the amount of labor required to de-pit each and every olive in this large vessel -- even just thinking of it makes you tired." Instead of eating the pithoi of pitted olives, say "They're tempting, but you don't want to ruin your appetite before the party proper!" The indefinite article is "some". Understand "olive" as the pithoi of pitted olives while the player is in the Store Room. Instead of taking the pithoi of pitted olives, try eating the pithoi of pitted olives. They are plural-named. The kylixes of kielbase are scenery. They are in the Store Room. The description is "Upon closer inspection, this might just be plain old sausage, but you're rather committed to the alliteration wheeze at this point." Instead of eating the kylixes of kielbase, say "They're tempting, but you don't want to ruin your appetite before the party proper!" The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the kielbase, try eating the kielbase. Understand "kylix/sausage" as the kylixes of kielbase. The skyphoi of skyr are scenery. They are in the Store Room. The description is "There's an absolutely whizzing hangover cure your man makes for you out of thick yogurt like this. You just add -- was it nutmeg? And some herb or other. Honestly, this is why having a man is so dashed convenient, not just for the doing of things but for the remembering of them." Instead of eating the skyphoi of skyr, say "It's tempting, but you don't want to ruin your appetite before the party proper!" The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the skyr, try eating the skyr. The oil lamps are scenery. They are in the Store Room. The description is "Filled with olive oil and set alight, which is what one of your unkinder Great-Aunts suggested was waiting for you in Tartarus if you didn't mend your ways. The ones near the entrance hang close from the low ceiling, but towards the far end they're suspended from a much higher point." The indefinite article is "some". Understand "lamp/chain/chains" as the oil lamps while the player is in the Store Room. Instead of doing something other than examining to the oil lamps, say "They're chained to the ceiling, so you can't work out how to do that, or at least how to do that without scattering scalding-hot oil every which way." Instead of touching or rubbing the oil lamps, say "Maybe for a dare, but there's no one around to offer one." [Man, I had a lot of free time for implementing random scenery before I had a kid] The rock ledge is scenery. It is in the Store Room. The description is "A rock ledge runs around the far wall of the store room, perhaps half a dozen feet above the wild mass of kraters." Understand "shelf" as the rock ledge when the player is in the store room. Understand "southern/far/south/-- wall" as the rock ledge when the player is in the store room. Instead of examining up when the player is in the store room, try examining the ledge. Does the player mean examining the rock ledge: it is very likely. Does the player mean climbing the rock ledge: it is very likely. Instead of examining south when the player is in the store room, try examining the rock ledge. Instead of climbing the pile of kraters, try going up. Instead of climbing the rock ledge, try going up. The pile of kraters is an object. It is scenery. It is in the Store Room. The description is "Now this is quite the pile!" Understand "mass of/-- kraters/--" as the pile of kraters while the player is in the store room. Instead of taking the pile of kraters, try pushing the pile of kraters. Understand "sweep [pile of kraters]" as pushing. The crater is part of the pile of kraters. Is is undescribed. Instead of doing something to the crater, say "One doesn't mean to be a grump, but you're looking for a krater with a k, which is a big-ish sort of cup, rather than a meteor-impact hole, which tends to be substantially less portable." Understand "craters" as the crater. Instead of pushing the pile of kraters, say "Given the size of the pile, moving it could take all evening, and you have other plans." Before examining the pile of kraters: If the krater of the east is undescribed: Say "After a few minutes of careful study, and a few moments of ignominy when you lose your footing and wind up desperately scrabbling in a cavalcade of kraters, you think you've found the one you're after, buried near the bottom of the pile: red-figure depictions of Eos, flora and fauna from Asia Minor, &c. The legend reading 'Krater of the East' provides a supernumerary clue."; Now the krater of the east is described; Now the crater is part of the krater of the east; Set pronouns from the krater of the east; Stop the action; Continue the action. Before examining the krater of the east: If the krater of the east is undescribed: Try examining the pile of kraters instead; Continue the action. [I think I hadn't realized that rule preambles could have more than one condition, is why I have all these dumb rules?] Before taking the krater of the east: If the krater of the east is undescribed: Say "Alky would certainly take a krater at random, rather than identifying the specific one being requested, and bluff his way through things. But you are not he, for good or ill (mostly for good, you think? This is getting awfully metaphysical)."; Stop the action; Continue the action. Krater clue count is a number that varies. Krater clue count is 0. Before doing something to the krater of the east: If the krater of the east is undescribed: Say "Which krater, exactly, do you mean? There's rather a pile of the deuced things."; Stop the action; If the krater of the east is not handled and krater clue count is not 5: increment krater clue count; Continue the action. [Oh hey, this is actually not terrible design -- I have a broadly-applicable rule tracking when the player tries to do something involving this object, so that the game starts giving more direct hints if it turns out the player's been faffing about a bunch!] Before tying the rope to the krater of the east: If the krater of the east is undescribed: Say "Which krater, exactly, do you mean? There's rather a pile of the deuced things."; Stop the action; Continue the action. There is an undescribed object called the Krater of the East. It is in the store room. The description is "Red-figure depictions of Eos, flora and fauna from Asia Minor, &c. The legend reading 'Krater of the East' provides a supernumerary clue.[if the krater clue count is 5 and the krater of the east is not handled] With it lodged in the treacherous pile of kraters, pulling the krater of the east clear doesn't exactly seem possible -- it's like trying to cook by holding the meat over the fire instead of using a skewer (you only tried it the once!) Perhaps you need some implement or other here, too.[end if][if the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east] A rather worn rope is tied in a loop around the krater's handles.[end if]". The printed name is "Krater of the East". Instead of inserting something into the krater of the east, say "The list doesn't specify that anything needs to go in the krater, and you'd prefer not to risk fouling things up." Instead of inserting the itch into the krater of the east, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." Instead of filling the krater of the east with something, say "The list doesn't specify that anything needs to go in the krater, and you'd prefer not to risk fouling things up." Understand "handle/handles/legend/eos/flora/fauna/figures/depictions/pictures/figure/red-figure" as the krater of the east. The printing of the krater of the east is "'Krater of the East' is written around the rim, in that attractive angular style you've never quite mastered (your handwriting trends rather more towards the squiggly)." Rule for printing the name of the krater of the east: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. Instead of pushing or pulling the krater of the east while the player does not carry the krater of the east and the krater of the east is not handled: If the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east, try taking the krater of the east instead; Say "[if the krater clue count is 5 and the krater of the east is not handled]Pulling the krater clear doesn't exactly seem possible so long as you have to stand on the treacherous pile to make the attempt -- it's like trying to cook by holding the meat over the fire instead of using a skewer (you only tried it the once!) Perhaps you need some implement or other here, too.[otherwise]You can't get your footing right to do anything like that to the krater.[end if]". Before pulling the rope: If the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east: Try taking the krater of the east; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. Before dropping the frayed rope: If the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east and the player carries the krater of the east: Say "You drop the rope, and it droops listlessly down to the floor. It remains attached to the krater, which you're still carrying, so it's a tad unclear what you've accomplished through this."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. Instead of searching the pile of kraters: Try examining the pile of kraters; Stop the action. [...I think I already remapped searching to examining way up top, didn't I? So this is useless] Instead of taking the frayed rope while the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east, try taking the krater of the east. Instead of taking the krater of the east: If the player carries the krater of the east: Say "You've already got the krater, so while you can faff about with it or the rope as much as you like, it won't accomplish very much."; stop the action; If the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east: Say "[if the krater clue count is 5 and the krater of the east is not handled]Pulling the krater clear doesn't exactly seem possible so long as you have to stand on the treacherous pile to make the attempt -- it's like trying to cook by holding the meat over the fire instead of using a skewer (you only tried it the once!) Perhaps you need some implement or other here, too.[otherwise]You give the krater you're after a tug, but it's lodged under quite a few other kraters, which does not exactly make for stable footing, and your efforts to dislodge it lead instead to dislodging yourself, in an arse-over-teakettle sort of way. You dust yourself off, with no-one having seen your bloomer on the plus side, but also no krater to show for it on the minus side.[end if]"; stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You step well clear of the pile of kraters and give the rope a good heave. It takes a bit more straining than you'll relate when you tell Alky the story later, but eventually you pull the Krater of the East clear of the pile, and you tuck it under your arm with a sense of accomplishment."; Increment Item Count; Now the player has the krater of the east; Now the player has the frayed rope. [Oh yeah, the Item Count -- this generically-named variable was meant to track how many of the scavenger-hunt items the player had accumulated at any point in time, except of course manually increasing and decreasing it as the player picked up and dropped stuff introduced lots of bugs, and I could have just used the fact that Inform knows what the player is carrying to make all those checks] Before going somewhere from the store room while the player is carrying the frayed rope and the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east and the player does not carry the krater of the east: Say "As you leave, the rope tugs its way free of your grip and slips to the floor, inasmuch as it's anchored to the Krater of the East, and by extension, that whole pile of the rummy things."; Try silently dropping the frayed rope; Continue the action. Instead of dropping the krater of the east, say "It is a bit toilsome to lug around, but after the trouble you took to get it, you'd rather not let the krater drop until you've gotten it where it needs to be." The Ledge Above the Store Room is a room. It is a dark room. "This must be the most precarious ledge you've ever perched upon -- though speaking frankly you're having a hard time recollecting any also-rans, what with the steep decline to the store room below being awfully distracting.[line break][line break]Away from the edge, there's a dark tunnel to the southeast, which isn't exactly inviting but at least promises some relief from the vertigo of your present position." Below the Ledge Above the Store Room is the Store Room. Southeast of the Ledge Above the Store Room is the Spring Source. Instead of going southeast from the ledge above the store room when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, especially with that steep drop close to hand!" Instead of going nowhere from the ledge above the store room when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, especially with that steep drop close to hand!" The rim is scenery. It is in the ledge above the store room. Instead of examining the rim, try examining down. Understand "ledge/decline/edge/shelf" as the rim while the player is in the ledge above the store room. Instead of examining down while the player is in the ledge above the store room, say "You've got a touch of acrophobia, which typically just means you're dreadfully unnerved by the Parthenon, but as a result looking down might be a mistake (you've also got a touch of agoraphobia, which makes it rather a bother to do the shopping)." [I don't think any players ever saw this actually-pretty-good joke, so consider it a little thank-you for reading this awful code] Spring Source is a room. "This high cavern is the source of a bubbling stream of water, which springs out of some nearby rocks, swirls for a while in a clean pool, and then dramatically leaps off the edge of a cliff as though it's trying to impress a potential romantic partner (though hard experience has taught you that this is less of a sure-fire stratagem than you'd think).[line break][line break]The dark ledge is back to the northwest." Northwest of the Spring Source is the Ledge Above the Store Room. Instead of going down from the Spring Source, say "You get ready to heave yourself into the muddy pool far below, but balk at the last moment: the point of all this rigmarole is to get ready for a shin-dig, and shin-digs are hard to enjoy when you've been shin-deep in a mud-pool." Instead of dropping the torch while the player is in the spring source, say "Getting back to, and then down from, that dim ledge would be a bumpy process without a spot of light." The cliff is scenery in the spring source. The description is "You are not exactly a connoisseur of rocks, and nothing here is making you regret that gap in knowledge." Understand "rock/rocks" as the cliff while the player is in the spring source. The pool of clear water is an undescribed fluid container. It is scenery. The liquid of the pool of clear water is water. The pool of clear water is everfull. It is in the Spring Source. The description is "This water is pellucid and crystalline -- just the stuff!" Instead of drinking the pool of clear water, say "You're typically not much of one for the non-alcoholic libations, but a swallow of this hits the spot!" Instead of taking the pool of clear water, say "Rather more potable than portable, old man." It is unknown. Understand "spring/stream" as the pool of clear water while the player is in the spring source. After pouring the pool of clear water into the amphora: increment Item Count; say "You dip the amphora into the pool until it's full up with water. It's rather heavy now, but you suppose you can put up with a modicum of toil for now, since the rest of the evening should be full of nothing but delightful ease." After printing the name of the amphora when taking inventory: If the amphora is full, say " (full of clear water)". After printing the name of the amphora when listing nondescript items: If the amphora is full, say " (full of clear water)"; omit contents in listing. Understand "water" as the amphora when the player is in the underworld and the player is not in the spring source and the amphora is full. Instead of inserting the pool of clear water into the krater, try pouring the pool of clear water into the krater. Instead of pouring the pool of clear water into the krater: Say "You're about to pour water into the krater, and then you realize they need the water in the amphora and you've got your pottery bollixed round again (Great-Aunt Agnes still won't let you live down that time you confused a kylix for an alabastron)." Instead of inserting something into the pool of clear water, say "You don't think the [noun] would appreciate spending the rest of the night completely sodden." Instead of inserting the heavily-smoking torch into the pool of clear water, say "That would lose you a torch and gain you a wet stick, which doesn't seem the best of trades." Instead of inserting the itch into the pool of clear water, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." Does the player mean filling the amphora with the amphora: it is very unlikely. The Granary is a room. "[one of]You smell this room before you enter it -- it gives off the kind of rank odor you rarely encounter outside the odd visit to a Great-Aunt who's rather let the housekeeping go to seed. The culprit is easy to detect: heaps of mostly-rotten grain clog the room everywhere you turn.[or]Heaps of mostly-rotten grain clog the room everywhere you turn.[stopping] [if the amphora is in the Granary]There's a vase in the corner -- no, hang on, that's an amphora, though admittedly a rather vase-like example of the type. [end if][line break][line break]The main cellar, offering a relative respite for your nose, lies east." East of the Granary is the Cellar. The heap of grain is scenery. It is in the Granary. "There is, unsurprisingly, a lot of grain in this granary; what's rather more outside-of-the-box is that nobody apparently could be troubled to put it in anything, and it's rather just heaped about the place. Inasmuch as there's a non-negligible amount of humidity, if not outright dankness, it's all completely rotten." Instead of taking the heap of grain, say "You've done sillier things than carry around rotting, inedible grain in your youth -- even as recently as this morning, if you're being honest -- but you like to think you've grown wiser from such experiences, and as such, leave the grain where it is." Instead of smelling the heap of grain, say "Oh good heavens no." Instead of eating the heap of grain, say "Oh good heavens no." Instead of tasting the heap of grain, say "Oh good heavens no." Understand "heaps" as the heap of grain while the player is in the granary. Instead of smelling while the player is in the granary, say "Oh good heavens no." The iron rings are an object. They are in the Granary. They are scenery. The description is "A pair of iron rings set into the wall -- really, they're large enough to be bracelets on you, if you were able to pull them out of the wall and decided to use them as jewelry, which you aren't and you wouldn't." The frayed rope is an object. It is in the Granary. It is knotted. It is a rope. It is undescribed. "A piece of frayed rope lies forlorn on the floor." The description is "You admire this piece of rope, still sturdy despite being frayed to an inch of its life (assuming ropes have life, which now that you think of it, they don't).[if the frayed rope is knotted and the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east] It's currently tying the amphora to a pair of iron rings embedded in the wall, with a series of knots so small and devilish that they must have been tied by the world's cleverest mosquito.[end if][if the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east] It's currently tied to the Krater of the East by the second-best sheepshead you've ever tied." The printed name of the frayed rope is "frayed rope[if the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east] (tied to the Krater of the East)[end if]". Understand "sheepshead" as the frayed rope while the frayed rope is stuck to the krater of the east. Understand "knot/knots" as the frayed rope while the frayed rope is knotted. Instead of lighting something when the player is in the granary, say "You're about to bring the torch to the [noun], when a memory draws you up short: at one of your Great-Aunt's interminable dinner parties, you were sat next to a bore of a grain-trader, whose conversation in general was a gift from Hypnos, but he did, despite himself, relate a rather thrilling story involving fire, an enclosed space, grain, and a massive explosion that's rather stuck with you (the story that is, not the explosion). You don't fully recall the details -- something about dust, was it? -- but decide in this instance not to tempt fate." Instead of pulling the frayed rope while the frayed rope is knotted and the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east, say "Inasmuch as it's anchored to iron rings on each side, the frayed rope is an unpromising candidate for pulling." Before taking the amphora: If the frayed rope is knotted and the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east: Say "This works less well than you'd hoped, inasmuch as the amphora is anchored to the wall by the rope."; stop the action; Now the frayed rope is described; Continue the action. Before taking the rope: If the frayed rope is knotted and the player is in the granary: Say "It's still tied to the wall, sad to say, so while you can hold a section of the rope and take it in a metaphysical sense, in another, perhaps more accurate sense, it's more like the rope would be taking you. Shuddering at the thought, you let it fall."; Stop the action; Continue the action. Before untying the amphora: If the amphora is in the granary and the frayed rope is knotted, try untying the frayed rope instead. In the Granary is an undescribed opaque fluid container called the amphora. The description of the amphora is "This is definitely an amphora, and not a vase. Or is that backwards? It's got a very narrow neck and stands about two feet tall[if the frayed rope is knotted and the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east], and is tied to iron rings in the wall by a well-knotted rope that's seen better days[end if].[if the amphora is empty and the barley is in the amphora] There are a few ears of barley at the very bottom of the amphora, looking at least marginally fresher than the rotten grain in the granary.[end if][if the amphora is full and the barley is in the amphora] It's full of [liquid], which has made the barley float right up by the neck.[end if][if the amphora is full and the barley is not in the amphora] It's full of [liquid]." Amphlipping is an action applying to nothing. Understand "flip amphora" as amphlipping. Understand "invert amphora" as amphlipping. Understand "turn over/-- amphora" as amphlipping. Understand "turn amphora upside down" as amphlipping. Understand "turn amphora over" as amphlipping. Understand "tip over/-- amphora" as amphlipping. Understand "tilt over/-- amphora over/--" as amphlipping. Understand "dump out/-- amphora out/--" as amphlipping. Understand "dump out/-- barley out/--" as amphlipping while the barley is in the amphora. Instead of drinking the amphora, say "[if the amphora is full and the barley is in the amphora]You take a sip of the water, its clean refreshing taste only somewhat marred by a hint of sour grain[end if][if the amphora is full and the barley is not in the amphora]You take a refreshing sip of the water[end if][if the amphora is empty]Drinking from an empty vessel seems like the kind of paradox that Zeno cove would dream up -- it's all well and good for philosophers to try such things but you must admit you don't fully see the point[end if]." Understand "drink from/-- the/-- [amphora] water/--" as drinking. Does the player mean drinking the amphora: it is likely. [Yes, I got distracted by the possibility of the player drinking from the amphora in the middle of defining this amphlipping action (a portmanteau of "amphora" and "flipping", duh] Instead of emptying the amphora when the amphora is not full, try amphlipping. Instead of amphlipping: If the player is carrying the amphora: Say "It's small but heavy, and since you need the amphora sufficiently intact to hold water, trying to flip it would run an unconscionable risk of breaking it (you're not sure you'd come through unscathed, either)."; Stop the action; If the player can see the amphora: Say "Before attempting that, you'd need to pick it up first."; Stop the action; If the player is carrying the largish chunk of amphora: Say "You flip the broken amphora over, impressing yourself by the display of dexterity but unsure what you've accomplished."; Stop the action; If the player can see the largish chunk of amphora: Say "Before attempting that, you'd need to pick it up first."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "What amphora?"; Stop the action. Instead of pushing or pulling or touching the amphora, say "Better to just pick it up and haul it where you want it -- the amphora might break if you shove it about." The vase is in the Granary. It is undescribed. It is scenery. Instead of doing something to the vase, say "That's not a vase, it's an amphora!" [Oh, this should have been part of the amphora so the joke worked in other places, too!] Instead of entering the amphora, say "The neck is too narrow for your hand, much less the rest of you!" Before inserting something into the amphora: If the noun is the pool of clear water, continue the action; If the noun is the itch, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." instead; Say "The amphora's interior is sufficiently inaccessible that you're worried you'd never see the [noun] again."; Stop the action. [...I am not sure why I felt the need to write a specific case for the player attempting to put their itchy temple into the amphora. I repeat, before I was a parent I had a lot of free time] Before examining the amphora: Say the description; Say "[line break]"; Stop the action. [... I think this cryptic rule is because I didn't want examining the amphora to do the default contents-listing thing, but I didn't know how to interact with those rules so I just brute-forced things] Inside the amphora is the barley. The barley is singular-named. The indefinite article is "some". The description is "These few ears of barley have seen better days, but at least they're not too rotten." Instead of eating the barley, say "If you were starving after ten days of shipwreck, you might consider eating the barley, but with a party and attendant banquet so close to hand, it's out of the question." Understand "ears/ear" as the barley. Does the player mean scratching the barley: it is very unlikely. After taking the barley: increment Item Count; say "Taken.[line break]" After dropping the barley: decrement Item Count; say "Dropped.[line break]" [I repeat, I really had no idea about the differences between Report and After rules at this point] Before taking the barley: If the barley is in the amphora and the amphora is empty, say "You strain -- gosh, do you strain! -- but try as you might to cram your hand into the amphora, the neck is just too narrow.[line break]"; If the barley is in the amphora and the amphora is empty, stop the action; Continue the action. Instead of taking the barley when the barley is in the amphora and the amphora is full: Say "The barley floats in the water, coming close enough to the opening that it's easy to lift out."; Now the player carries the barley; Increment item count. Instead of going east from the cellar when the garden is visited and the player carries the torch: Say "Now that you know the way to the garden, it's a simple matter to retrace your steps."; Now the player is in the garden. The Cave is a room. "This unfinished bit of the cellars is more of a cave than a cellar, and [if the player carries the torch]despite your sputtering torch, [end if]it's sufficiently dark that you can't guarantee you'll sleep nightmare-free tonight.[line break][line break]Alky, and the eventual party, lie westward, and -- less attractively -- more darkness stretches eastward." East of the Cave is More Cave. West of the Cave is the Cellar. Instead of smelling while the player is in the cave, say "One must admit that a dank cave has a peculiar, if not unique, odor. One must also admit that the said odor is just awful." More Cave is a room. "[one of]You don't like to criticize, but this cavernous chamber is definitely darker than would be ideal.[line break][line break]As before, light, civilization, and friends who know how to fill out a toga lie west, darkness and yet more cave are to the east.[or]This cave is part of the east-west progression of the overall cave system, in the same way that the most boring ode your tutor ever made you memorize was part of the overall boringest book of odes your tutor ever made you memorize.[stopping]". West of More Cave is The Cave. East of More Cave is Yet Additional Cave. It is a dark room. Instead of going east from More Cave when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, or rather, you're not so dim as to do so." Instead of smelling while the player is in more cave, say "One must admit that a dank cave has a peculiar, if not unique, odor. One must also admit that the said odor is just awful." Every turn when the player is in the more cave and the player does not carry the torch: Now the can't go that way rule response (A) is "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, or rather, you're not so dim as to do so." Every turn when the player is in the underworld or the player carries the torch or Alky is in the cellar: Now the can't go that way rule response (A) is "There are many fine directions you could traipse from here, but sadly that isn't among them." [...yet more hacks, I think required here because I didn't realize you could make subregions or test whether a location is dark?] Yet Additional Cave is a room. "[one of]This seems like it must be a natural cave, because the alternative -- that whatever architect designed these cellars decided that his vision required this many tunnels, and that whatever workmen hired to realize the said vision quarried them out uncomplainingly -- is too bleak to contemplate.[line break][line break]Per the long-settled drill, bright areas, familiar friends, all that is good in the world, the promise of alcoholic drinks, laughter, conversation, and a heretofore-taken-for-granted absence of dank cave smells are all west, and everything not counted in column A is east.[or]There's cave to the west of you, and cave to the east of you -- hang on, this reminds you of a joke you heard once, how did it go?[stopping]". West of Yet Additional Cave is More Cave. It is a dark room. Instead of going anywhere from Yet Additional Cave when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, or rather, you're not so dim as to do so." Instead of dropping the torch while the player is in yet additional cave, say "You're deep enough into these caves that you mislike your chances of making it back sans light." Instead of smelling while the player is in yet additional cave, say "One must admit that a dank cave has a peculiar, if not unique, odor. One must also admit that the said odor is just awful." A room called Quite Sufficient Qua Cave So Far As You're Concerned is east of Yet Additional Cave. "[one of]You are a broad-minded man. When old Ptolly was over the moon for that Scythian bird, everyone else laughed, but you helped him translate his love poems into her awful dialect, spending many a late night poring over lexicons until you had it just right (the fact that, upon receipt of the poem aforementioned, she got her tribe to launch one of the more vicious raids Athens has seen these past few decades, was surely down to the inherent weaknesses in the source text's scansion and meter, rather than any flaw in your work). But -- all this to say, even for someone of your generally liberal tendencies, this is really getting to be a bit much.[line break][line break]To get back to Alky and the rest of the cellars, you'll need to return through more cave to the west than you care to contemplate, while another chamber opens up to the south.[or]The only thing you can bring yourself to notice about this bit of cave is that there's a chamber to the south and more tedium-inducing cave back to the west.[stopping]". It is a dark room. South of Quite Sufficient Qua Cave So Far As You're Concerned is the Garden. Instead of going anywhere from Quite Sufficient Qua Cave So Far As You're Concerned when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, or rather, you're not so dim as to do so." Instead of dropping the torch while the player is in quite sufficient qua cave so far as you're concerned, say "You're deep enough into these caves that you mislike your chances of making it back sans light." Instead of smelling while the player is in quite sufficient qua cave so far as you're concerned, say "One must admit that a dank cave has a peculiar, if not unique, odor. One must also admit that the said odor is just awful." [Yet more copy and pasting -- I'm pretty sure I forgot to put that "instead of dropping the torch" rule into one of these locations in the initial release, which could make the game unwinnable] Instead of going north from the garden when the player carries the torch: Say "Now that you know the way to the garden, it's a simple matter to retrace your steps back to the cellar."; Now the player is in the cellar. The Garden is a room. "[one of]You let out an approving cluck when you realize that, contrary to expectation, you have at last run out of cave. This largish grotto seems to be some kind of subterranean garden -- a grated opening in the roof of the cavern lets in copious moonlight (you deduce that this would be sunlight during the day), which shines on a large, desultorily-tended bed of herbs. There's a higher part of the cave above you, whence gushes a muddy waterfall that's created a larger, even muddier pool.[line break][line break]The world's most boring cave system waits for you to the north.[or]This largish grotto seems to be some kind of subterranean garden -- a grated opening in the roof of the cavern lets in copious moonlight (you deduce that this would be sunlight during the day!), which shines on a large, desultorily-tended bed of herbs. There's a higher part of the cave above you, whence gushes a muddy waterfall that's created a larger, even muddier pool.[line break][line break]The world's most boring cave system waits for you to the north.[stopping]". Instead of going anywhere from the Garden when the player does not carry the torch, say "It's rather too dim to be blundering about aimlessly, or rather, you're not so dim as to do so." Understand "X grotto" as looking while the player is in the garden. Understand "examine grotto" as looking while the player is in the garden. Instead of dropping the torch while the player is in the garden, say "You're deep enough into these caves that you mislike your chances of making it back sans light." The grated opening is scenery. It is in the Garden. The description is "This grate in the ceiling would be a grate in the ground if you were tromping about on the surface. It lets in sufficient light from above to allow for the subterranean cultivation of herbs." Understand "grate/moon/moonlight/light/grating" as the grated opening while the player is in the garden. Instead of opening the grated opening, say "It's a bit too high up for that!" Instead of tying the frayed rope to the grated opening, say "You consider whether this would help you get up to where the water's coming from, but your aim is too bad, the grate is too high, the rope is too short, and even were those issues resolved, you'd still get all muddied clambering your way up. Surely there's some other route you can find!" Instead of throwing the frayed rope at the grated opening, try tying the frayed rope to the grated opening. Instead of examining up when the player is in the garden, try examining the grated opening. Does the player mean drinking the muddy water: it is very unlikely. Does the player mean drinking the waterfall: it is unlikely. The waterfall is a staircase. It is scenery. It is above the Garden. It is below the Spring Source. The description is "[If the player is in the Garden]Muddy water cascades down the earthen wall here, from a presumably-cleaner source somewhere above.[otherwise]Clear water cascades down over the ledge, getting muddy as it goes." Instead of drinking the waterfall, say "That muddy water is not exactly man-potable, old man." Instead of inserting something into the waterfall while the player is in the garden, try inserting the noun into the muddy water. Instead of inserting something into the waterfall while the player is in the spring source, try inserting the noun into the pool of clear water. Instead of filling something with the waterfall while the player is in the spring source, try filling the noun with the pool of clear water. Instead of filling something with the waterfall while the player is in the garden, try filling the noun with the muddy water. Instead of inserting the amphora into the pool of clear water, try filling the noun with the pool of clear water. Instead of inserting the amphora into the muddy water, try filling the noun with the muddy water. Instead of going up from the Garden, say "It does seem like there might be cleaner water somewhere up there, but the walls here are awfully muddy and slick. A scrabble up seems neither appealing nor likely to be especially productive." In the Garden is a fluid container called the muddy water. It is scenery. "This beyond-filthy puddle is the natural result of the medium-filthy waterfall cascading down the quite-filthy wall, from a presumably-cleaner source somewhere above." Instead of taking the muddy water, say "That muddy water is not exactly man-potable, old man." Instead of pouring the muddy water into something, say "That muddy water is not exactly man-potable, old man." Instead of drinking the muddy water, say "That muddy water is not exactly man-potable, old man." Understand "mud/pool" as the muddy water while the player is in the garden. It is unknown. Instead of inserting the amphora into the muddy water, try pouring the muddy water into the amphora. Instead of pouring the amphora into the muddy water, try pouring the muddy water into the amphora. Instead of inserting something into the muddy water, say "You don't think the [noun] would appreciate spending the rest of the night completely sodden and covered in muck." Instead of inserting the heavily-smoking torch into the muddy water, say "That would lose you a torch and gain you a wet, dirty stick, which doesn't seem the best of trades." Instead of inserting the itch into the muddy water, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." Instead of cutting the herb bed with something, try cutting the herb bed. Instead of cutting the herb bed: say "You can't just harvest the herbs willy-nilly -- Alky only needs the pennyroyal![if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere] You're beginning to think that the list wasn't narrowing things down sufficiently when it said the herb was lavender.[end if]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. Instead of cutting the misleading garden placeholder, try cutting the herb bed. Instead of cutting the useless garden placeholder, try cutting the herb bed. [...wait, I had *two different* dummy objects here? Good lord] Instead of cutting the pennyroyal with the knife, try cutting the pennyroyal. Instead of cutting the pennyroyal: If the pennyroyal is rooted: Say "Having zeroed in on the correct herb through your superior nasal acuity, you cut a sprig of pennyroyal from its bed."; Now the player carries the pennyroyal; Increment item count; Now the pennyroyal is uprooted; Otherwise: Say "The pennyroyal might make a nice pesto if minced, but you try to focus more on the eating rather than the cooking side of things." The pennyroyal clue count is a number that varies. The pennyroyal clue count is 0. The herb bed is scenery. It is in the Garden. The indefinite article is "an". The description is "The bed holds row after row of herbs, with quite a lot, it must be admitted, occupying the purple-ish portion of the palette. [if the pennyroyal is nowhere]That pennyroyal might take some finding.[otherwise]Now that you know what you're looking for, the pennyroyal is easy to pick out.[end if]". Understand "herb/-- herbs/leaf/garden/flower/leafs/flowers/beds" as the herb bed. Understand "find [something]" as searching. Instead of smelling the garden, try smelling the herb bed. Understand "pennyroyal" as the herb bed when the pennyroyal is not nowhere and the pennyroyal is not visible. Before examining the herb bed: If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: Increment pennyroyal clue count. Instead of taking the herb bed: Say "[If the player carries the pennyroyal]An additional sprig would be superfluous.[otherwise]You can't just uproot the herbs willy-nilly -- Alky only needs the pennyroyal![end if][if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere][line break]You're beginning to think that the list wasn't narrowing things down sufficiently when it said the herb was lavender.[end if]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. Instead of searching the herb bed: Say "You find a lavender herb! No, wait, now you look closer actually this one's [one of]mauve[or]violet[or]fuchsia[or]lilac[at random].[if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere][line break]You're beginning to think that the list wasn't narrowing things down sufficiently when it said the herb was lavender.[end if]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. Does the player mean examining the useless garden placeholder: it is unlikely. Does the player mean examining the misleading garden placeholder: it is unlikely. There is an undescribed object in the garden called the useless garden placeholder. Understand "purple/lilac/mauve/fuchsia/violet herb/herbs/leaf/leafs/flower/flowers" and "purple/lilac/mauve/fuchsia/violet" as the useless garden placeholder. The description is "No, definitely not what you're looking for!" Instead of smelling the useless garden placeholder, try smelling the herb bed. Instead of taking the useless garden placeholder: say "You're fairly sure that isn't the pennyroyal.[if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere][line break]You're beginning to think that the list wasn't narrowing things down sufficiently when it said the herb was lavender.[end if]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. There is an undescribed object in the garden called the misleading garden placeholder. Understand "lavender/pennyroyal herb/herbs/flower/flowers/leaf/leafs/--" as the misleading garden placeholder. Instead of doing something other than searching or smelling to the misleading garden placeholder, say "It must be around here somewhere, but deuced if you can tell where, exactly." Instead of searching the misleading garden placeholder, try searching the herb bed. The misleading garden placeholder is unknown. Instead of smelling the misleading garden placeholder, try smelling the herb bed. Understand "dig in/up/-- [something]" as digging. Digging is an action applying to one visible thing. Carry out digging: Say "As your Great-Aunt has said, you're not one to get your hands dirty[If the player is in the garden and the pennyroyal is nowhere], and in any case you're fairly certain herbs aren't roots[end if]." Instead of smelling the herb bed: If the pennyroyal is nowhere: Say "Mmmm, there's a delightful smell of mint coming from one of these purplish herbs -- that must be the pennyroyal!"; Now the Pennyroyal is in the garden; Now the misleading garden placeholder is nowhere; Set pronouns from the pennyroyal; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You catch a delightful whiff of mint from the pennyroyal." Instead of eating the herb bed: Say "If word got [apostrophe]round that you'd been grazing on greenery like some kind of ruminant, without there even being a bet involved -- well, you're not sure what would happen, exactly, but you'd doubt you'd be invited to the good parties any longer. [if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere]Besides, if you're trying to track down a particular flavor, another sense might do the job more efficiently. [end if][line break]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. Instead of tasting the herb bed: Say "If word got [apostrophe]round that you'd been grazing on greenery like some kind of ruminant, without there even being a bet involved -- well, you're not sure what would happen, exactly, but you'd doubt you'd be invited to the good parties any longer. [if the pennyroyal clue count is 7 and the pennyroyal is nowhere]Besides, if you're trying to track down a particular flavor, another sense might do the job more efficiently.[end if]"; If the pennyroyal clue count is not 7: increment pennyroyal clue count. A thing can be rooted or uprooted. A thing is usually uprooted. The sprig of pennyroyal is an object. The indefinite article is "a". The description is "The flowers on this herb are definitely more puce than lavender -- you'll need to have a word with Alky. Meantime, you enjoy its minty-fresh smell." Instead of eating the pennyroyal, say "You take the smallest experimental nibble of the pennyroyal and verify that the mintiness is not confined just to its odor." Instead of smelling the pennyroyal, say "It continues to lend a pleasant minty scent to proceedings." Understand "sprig/lavender/puce" as the pennyroyal. Understand "lavender/puce/-- herb" as the pennyroyal when the pennyroyal is not nowhere. Understand "herb" as the pennyroyal when the player is in the cellar. The sprig of pennyroyal is rooted. After taking the pennyroyal: increment Item Count; If the pennyroyal is rooted: say "Having zeroed in on the correct herb through your superior nasal acuity, you pluck a sprig of pennyroyal from its bed."; Now the pennyroyal is uprooted; Otherwise: Say "Taken." After dropping the pennyroyal: decrement Item Count; say "Dropped." There is an object called the list of ceremonial desiderata. The description is "Alky helpfully handed over this list of all the ritual bric-a-brac he lost in the cellars during his last bender. There are rather a lot of words, so you'll have to really commit if you want to read it." The printing is "-The Krater of the East (a krater is a sort of large vase)[line break]-An amphora of clear water (an amphora is a different sort of large vase)[line break]-A knife. Any knife will do, and there are probably some up here now that I think of it, but you might as well pick one up for us while you're down there, eh?[line break]-An ear of barley, for the kykeon (you'll like the kykeon!)[line break]-A sprig of pennyroyal, adds a delightful minty flavor to the kykeon (look for the lavender flowers!)" The player carries the list. [Here we are, some 20,000 words in and after doing all the Act I scenery and objects, and we're finally getting around to listing the player's starting inventory] The knife is an undescribed object. It is a blade. The description is "[if Puffy carries the knife and Finale is not happening]Puffy's got your knife now -- you'd like to ask for it back, but perhaps best to wait until after you're fully initiated.[end if][if Puffy carries the knife and Finale is happening]Puffy's somehow managed to hang on to your knife through all the evening's madness.[end if][If Puffy does not carry the knife]A steel knife, sharper than your wits, hopefully. Or, wait, perhaps the other way round?" After taking the knife: increment Item Count; say "Taken." After dropping the knife: decrement Item Count; Say "Dropped." After examining the player: If the knife is undescribed: Say "You've got a tickle of an itch right at your temple.". Before scratching the player: If the player has the hard cylindrical object: Say "You're not especially itchy at the mo, but nonetheless give yourself a few prophylactic scratches."; Stop the action; If the knife is undescribed: Say "As your fingers brush the side of your head, they come across a hard, cylindrical object."; Now the player has the hard cylindrical object; Now the itch is nowhere; Stop the action; Say "You're not especially itchy at the mo, but nonetheless give yourself a few prophylactic scratches."; Stop the action. Understand "temple" as yourself while the player is in the underworld. Understand "ear" as yourself. Understand "head" as yourself while the player is in the underworld. Instead of touching yourself, try scratching the player. [More bad design to make these understand statements contingent on being in Act I] The itch is an undescribed object. The player carries it. Instead of examining the itch, say "You've got a tickle of an itch right at your temple.". Instead of scratching the itch, try scratching yourself. Instead of doing something other than examining or scratching to the itch, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." Instead of inserting the itch into something, say "If you've got your metaphysics right, there is a sense in which that might be possible, but in actual fact, it isn't, so metaphysics isn't exactly covering itself in glory here." There is an object called hard cylindrical object. The printed name of the hard cylindrical object is "a hard, cylindrical object (tucked behind your ear)". Understand "cylinder" as the hard cylindrical object. Before doing something to the hard cylindrical object: Say "Hang on, this is that knife you lost! You take it down from your ear, nicking your fingers only twice or thrice in the process."; Now the hard cylindrical object is nowhere; Now player has the knife; Increment Item Count; Stop the action. Item Count is a number which varies. Item Count is 0. Before going up from the cellar: Say "As you start up the stairs, Alky grabs the list from you and gives you the once-over; you flush, but sadly he's not seeing if you look fetching so much as he's seeing whether you've done all the fetching.[line break][line break]"; If the pennyroyal is carried, say "Alky takes a good sniff of you. 'Mmm, minty -- you must have found the pennyroyal!'[line break][line break]"; If the pennyroyal is not carried, say "'I don't see the pennyroyal on you,' Alky sniffs.[line break][line break]"; If the Amphora is carried: If the amphora is empty, say "'Well, you've got an amphora,' Alky says. 'Too bad it's the water that's the important bit.'[line break][line break]"; If the amphora is not empty, say "'Ah, you've got some water!' Alky says. 'Don't worry, we're not drinking it.'[line break][line break]"; If the Amphora is not carried, say "'If you think it counts because you've got water in your tummy,' Alky says, 'nothing doing -- you need an amphora to carry it in.'[line break][line break]"; If the barley is carried, say "You show Alky the ear of barley; it's off-color and limp, like your Great-Uncle Sargy's sense of humor, but it must pass muster since after a few moments of skeptical perusal Alky gives a short nod.[line break][line break]"; If the amphora is carried and the barley is in the amphora, say "You try to convince Alky that he should let you up because you've got the barley, it's just inaccessible, but apparently technicalities will not carry the day.[line break][line break]"; If the barley is not carried and the amphora is not carried, say "When it comes time to give Alky the barley, you make a show of patting down your chiton, as though you've simply misplaced it for the moment, but you don't think you've fooled him.[line break][line break]"; If the krater of the east is carried, say "'Good show,' Alky crows as he takes in the krater.[line break][line break]"; If the krater of the east is not carried, say "'Come now, no krater?' Alky asks with incredulity. 'What do you think we'll libate out of?' You have no answer (besides mouthing 'You mean, out of what do you think we'll libate,' since your valet is very strict on preposition usage).[line break][line break]"; If the knife is not carried, say "'I know you're generally not trusted with sharp objects,' Alky says sympathetically, 'but we really do need that knife.'[line break][line break]"; If the knife is carried, say "'Oh, there's that knife!' Alky smiles at you, but gives you a wide berth, as though he's worried that you'll wind up accidentally pricking him, like you did that one time last week, or the three times the week before that.[line break][line break]"; If Item Count is less than five: Say "'Sorry, old chap, can't let you up,' Alky says, striking the proper, firm tone. 'Bit more work to be done yet!' He hands you back the list."; Stop the action; Say "'Cheerio, that looks like the lot!' Alky says. 'Onward and upward!' He helps you manage your somewhat-unwieldy collection of vegetable matter, pottery, [if the player carries the torch]fire-sticks, [end if]and sharp objects up the stairs, though you somewhat lose track of your possessions in the process."; Now the pennyroyal is undescribed; Now the pennyroyal is on the small platter; Now the amphora is nowhere; Now the barley is undescribed; Now the barley is on the small platter; Now the frayed rope is not stuck to the krater of the east; Now the krater of the east is nowhere; Now Puffy carries the knife; Now the list is nowhere; Now Alky is in the banquet hall; Now the frayed rope is nowhere; Now the rope belt is in the peristyle; Now the ritual stage is 0; Now Puffy is known; Now the largish chunk of amphora is known; Now the banqueting olives are known; Now the dates are known; Now the figs are known; Now the grapes are known; Now the massive roast is known; Now Machon is known; Now the cheeses are known; Now the cakes are known; Now the banquet food is known; Now the pile of toothpicks is known; Now the toothpick is known; Now the pepper pot is known; Now the urns of wine are known; Now the tam is known; Now the boa is known; Now the crown is known; Now the chain is known; Now the sandals are known; Now the set of cothurni are known; Now the ear warmers are known; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "Upon surmounting the stairs, you take a deep breath of the fresh air -- a chap can only be subterranean for so long before longing to inhale the old clear-and-rarefied. You've come up into a courtyard, amidst a crowd of chaps who burst into raucous applause once they see you and Alky ferrying up the instruments of merriment. One of them, a thin-faced, sallow number, comes over to take custody of the loot.[line break][line break]'Here you are, Puffy,' says Alky, humping the amphora into the other[']s arms. 'Kick us off, eh?'[line break][line break]This rather-inappositely-named Puffy motions for silence, and the fellows oblige him. After two or three more throat-clearings than seem strictly necessary by your book, he sweeps his arm around to take in the crowd. 'Brethren,' he intones, 'initiates of the sacred mysteries, on this most holy and solemn night we welcome newcomers to our fold, that they may learn the praise that is most pleasing to the God and Goddess, and partake of our portion of eternity.'[line break][line break]'I'd settle for partaking of our portion of the wine!' pipes up one of your fellow initiates, prompting further cheering from the hoi polloi and a pained grimace from Puffy. 'Get on with it,' comes another call, and Puffy, sensing that he's losing the room, waves his hand in surrender. 'All right chaps, I'll hurry it up!' He drags the amphora over to a fountain in the middle of the courtyard with some speed, pouring it out then discarding it with such haste that it breaks in the confusion, to much hooting from the mob.[line break][line break]He dashes some water from the fountain into the krater you brought, then pours it out -- then does the same with another, matching krater, though pouring it out in the opposite direction this time, as though it were a real hit the first time but needed just a little tweak to really bowl them over. 'That's the libation sorted, you lot can get to the feasting,' he yells. 'Initiates, come to the telesterion for the ceremony.' With much rejoicing, the crowd disperses, leaving you alone." [Oi -- I think that "now X is known" business has to do with the dialogue "system", where you can't ask about stuff before you know about it? Except instead of making stuff as known automatically when the player sees it, I did... whatever this is] The Underworld is a region. The Cave and More Cave and Yet Additional Cave and Quite Sufficient Qua Cave and the Cellar and the Granary and the Ledge Above the Store Room and the Spring Source and the Garden and the Store Room are in the Underworld. The generic Underworld wall is a backdrop in the Underworld. The description is "The walls, like the floor, are a clay-ey, mucky sort of number whose contemplation makes you hitch up your chiton[if the player is in the Store Room], but you think you can see a recessed ledge up near the top of the chamber, just above the pile of kraters[end if]." Understand "walls" as the generic Underworld wall. The generic Underworld floor is a backdrop in the Underworld. The description is "The floor, like the walls, is a clay-ey, mucky sort of number whose contemplation makes you hitch up your chiton." Instead of pouring something into the generic Underworld floor, try emptying the noun. The generic Underworld ceiling is a backdrop in the Underworld. The description is "There's rather an oppressively large amount of dirt looming not very high above you, here, which is unrewarding to contemplate.[If the player is in the Garden] Over by the waterfall, there's a bit more head-space.[end if][If the player is in the Store Room] Though, now that you peer more closely, it looks like the ceiling's a bit higher above the pile of kraters, with perhaps some kind of ledge up there." Understand "dirt" as the generic Underworld ceiling while the player is in the Underworld. Chapter 2 - A Long-Expected Party [D'ya get the reference? Huh?] The Peristyle is a room. "Come to think, you've never had the foggiest what a peristyle is, but this pillar-and-porch number here seems as reasonable a candidate as any (though twist your arm, it looks just like a courtyard to you).[line break][line break]There's a small closet in an outbuilding to the north and the exit to the countryside lies west, but more appealing are the paths southward, [if departing has not happened]source of drinking songs and belches, [otherwise]where lies the now-deserted banquet hall, [end if]and eastwards, whence [if departing has not happened]quiet music and some jolly bracing incense [otherwise]the sour smells of the spilled kykeon [end if]waft. The stairs back down to the cellars are off in a dingy corner." The Peristyle is above the rough wooden staircase. West of the Peristyle is the Portico. East of the Peristyle is the Telesterion. North of the Peristyle is the Closet. South of the Peristyle is the Banquet Hall. Instead of going down from the Peristyle, say "As you tread your way back down the stairs, you take a mo to tot up the pros vs. the cons of this course of action. Here: libations, cheer, bosom companions, and an intriguing initiation. There: dankness, the largest heap of rotten grain you've ever seen, a thoroughly ramified cave system, and one admittedly-quite-picturesque waterfall. Your brain wraps up its cogitations by the time you reach step number seven, and you congratulate yourself on your narrow escape as you scurry back upwards." Instead of entering the outbuilding, try going north. Instead of going inside while the player is in the peristyle, try going north. Instead of listening while the player is in the peristyle, say "[if departing has not happened]Sounds of merriment come from the south, while restrained harp music is drifting in from the east[otherwise]It's eerily quiet here, now that the celebrants have fled outside[end if]." Instead of smelling while the player is in the peristyle, say "[if departing has not happened]There's a sweet yet smoky odor coming from the east[otherwise]Time and spillage has not improved the odor of the fermented-barley-and-mint drink -- even at this distance it's doing quite a number on the old olfactory channels[end if]." [Hey look, it's a scene(departing)! I learned how they worked for Chapter 3, at which point I updated the descriptions here to account for the fun stuff that closes this section. Note that there's a lot of places in this chapter where knowing how scenes work would have been useful] Before going west from the peristyle: If Departing is not happening: say "It'd be a long, cold, dark walk back to Athens, even leaving aside that you're not yet really initiated and there's quite a lot of revelry yet undone."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. The outbuilding is in the peristyle. It is scenery. Understand "closet/shed" as the outbuilding while the player is in the peristyle. The description is "A rather shed-like outbuilding off to the north side of the peristyle that seems to hold some of the evening's paraphernalia." The water fountain is in the peristyle. The water fountain is a fluid container. The liquid of the water fountain is water. The water fountain is everfull. "There's a stone fountain at the center of the courtyard, happily burbling just the way you do after Alky's made you drink number seven." The description of the water fountain is "The water in the fountain is clean and clear enough, though much less enticing than what's on offer at the feast." Instead of taking the water fountain, say "The fountain is rather more potable than portable." The water fountain is unknown. Instead of inserting the water fountain into something, try filling the second noun with the water fountain. Instead of inserting something into the water fountain, say "You don't think the [noun] would appreciate spending the rest of the night completely sodden." Instead of inserting the heavily-smoking torch into the water fountain, say "That would lose you a torch and gain you a wet stick, which doesn't seem the best of trades." Instead of inserting the cup into the water fountain, try filling the cup with the fountain. Instead of taking the fountain while the player carries the cup, try filling the cup with the fountain. Instead of drinking the water fountain: Say "Water's not your usual wheeze, but dashed if that wasn't refreshing[if the player is sneezing] -- and it seems to have washed out your throat, too[end if]![if the player is hiccuping][line break]After a moment, you're pretty sure that it's fixed your hiccups, too.[end if]"; Now the player is unsneezing; Now the sneezing count is 0; Now the player is unhiccuping; Now the hiccuping count is 0. Instead of washing in the water fountain: Say "You splash some water about your face -- bracing![if the player is sneezing][line break]You've cleared that blasted pepper off your nose now, too.[end if][if the player is hiccuping][line break]Bending over the fountain and holding your breath as you washed seems to have cured your hiccups.[end if]"; Now the player is wakeful; Now the player is unsneezing; Now the sneezing count is 0; Now the player is unhiccuping; Now the hiccuping count is 0. Understand "splash [water] on face" as washing in when the player is in the peristyle. Instead of swimming in the water fountain, try washing in the water fountain. The largish chunk of amphora is a chapeau. It is in the Peristyle. The description is "This was definitely an amphora, and not a vase. Or is that backwards? This head-sized chunk, from the bottom part of the thing, is that all that survived Puffy's tender ministrations." It is unknown. Instead of inserting something into the largish chunk of amphora, say "After your little oopsy-boopsy on the way up the stairs, the amphora isn't holding anything again." Instead of putting something on the largish chunk of amphora, say "After your little oopsy-boopsy on the way up the stairs, the amphora isn't holding anything again." Instead of wearing the largish chunk of amphora: Increase the ridiculous count by 3; Say "You now have a heavy piece of broken pottery perched atop the bean, which must be in the running for the silliest headgear you've ever sported. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the largish chunk of amphora. After taking off the largish chunk of amphora: Say "It's a bit easier getting the amphora off your head than it was getting it on, but the old gourd still takes a buffeting along the way."; Now the player is carrying the largish chunk of amphora; Decrease the ridiculous count by 3. [This is for the comedy puzzle -- in retrospect, it would have been easier, and less bug-prone, to have a routine that just calculated the ridiculousness of the player based on the items they're currently wearing, and also assigning a ridiculousness quantity to each item as a property, rather than this farrago of rule-by-rule copy and pasting. But here we are] The rope belt is a belt. It is nowhere. The printed name of the rope belt is "frayed rope". The description is "The bit of frayed rope must have been cut free of the krater during the melee when you came up from below. After the ordeal, it's even more frayed and now only a bit longer than your leg." Understand "frayed" as the rope belt while the player is not in the Underworld. Understand "frayed rope" as the rope belt while the player is not in the Underworld. Does the player mean questioning someone about the rope belt: it is very likely. [Since I wasn't sure how to make the same rope both a rope and a belt, I swapped the rope version of the object for this new belt one during the act break] Instead of wearing the rope belt: Decrease the ridiculous count by 1; Say "You knot the rope around your hips. Beyond being an ugly old thing, now it's also rather bunching up your chiton -- certainly this is approaching a nadir of fashion. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the rope belt. After taking off the rope belt: Say "With a sense of relief, you exile the rather-decrepit belt from your ensemble."; Now the player is carrying the rope belt; Increase the ridiculous count by 1. There is a room called the closet. It is north of the peristyle. "Either the rites of Eleusis involve quite a lot of fancy-dress shenanigans, or one of the priests is a clothes horse of very little discernment, because this small room is chock-a-block with clothes, including a hat rack, a bin for accessories, and a bench heaped with shoes -- everything you might need for a party or some light comic theater.[line break][line break]The peristyle is back to the south." Instead of exiting while the player is in the closet, try going south. The clothes are scenery. Understand "clothing" as the clothes while the player is in the closet. They are plural-named. They are in the closet. The description of the clothes is "Up close, these items are fairly tawdry -- your valet would not approve." Instead of taking the clothes, say "None of them are a stitch on your chiton." The hat rack is a supporter. It is undescribed. It is in the closet. The description is "This wooden number sports a profusion of hats -- [if the silly floppy tam is undescribed and the crown of laurels is undescribed and the ear warmers are described]among the swarm, a silly, floppy tam and a crown of laurels catch your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is undescribed and the crown of laurels is described and the ear warmers are described]among the swarm, a silly, floppy tam catches your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is described and the crown of laurels is undescribed and the ear warmers are described]among the swarm, a crown of laurels catches your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is described and the crown of laurels is described and the ear warmers are described]none of the swarm of hats has much to recommend, though[end if][if the silly floppy tam is undescribed and the crown of laurels is undescribed and the ear warmers are undescribed]among the swarm, a silly, floppy tam, some ear warmers, and a crown of laurels catch your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is undescribed and the crown of laurels is described and the ear warmers are undescribed]among the swarm, a silly, floppy tam and some ear warmers catch your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is described and the crown of laurels is undescribed and the ear warmers are undescribed]among the swarm, some ear warmers and a crown of laurels catch your eye[end if][if the silly floppy tam is described and the crown of laurels is described and the ear warmers are undescribed]among the swarm, some ear warmers catch your eye[end if]." Instead of taking the hat rack, say "[if departing is not happening]No one could blame you for nicking one or two of these fine hats, but the whole rack would be taking things a bit too far.[otherwise]You consider whether the wooden rack could meet the need vis a vis repairing the wheel, but it looks a bit too straight and unbendy for the purpose. Besides, you'd need to find a place for all these deuced hats." Understand "hats" as the hat rack. [Did you like that incredibly long description? If so, I have god news!] Understand "hat" as the tam when the player is wearing the tam. Understand "hat" as the crown of laurels when the player is wearing the crown of laurels. Understand "hat" as the largish chunk of amphora while the player is wearing the largish chunk of amphora. Understand "hat" as the ear warmers while the player is wearing the ear warmers. Does the player mean taking off the hat rack: it is very unlikely. The accessory bin is an opaque container. It is undescribed. It is in the closet. The description is "You root around in the bin like a pig whose supper depends on finding a prize truffle. [if the feather boa is undescribed and the gold chain is undescribed]Your best finds are a feather boa, and a gold chain that could do for a belt in a pinch[end if][if the feather boa is undescribed and the gold chain is described]Your best find is a feather boa[end if][if the feather boa is described and the gold chain is undescribed]Your best find is a gold chain that could do for a belt in a pinch[end if][if the feather boa is described and the gold chain is described]You don't come up with anything new, sadly (all the worse for the notional pig)[end if]." Understand "accessories" as the accessory bin while the player is in the closet. Instead of taking the accessory bin, say "Even if for some reason you wanted to abstract the whole bin, your somewhat-noodly arms wouldn't be up to the task." Instead of searching the accessory bin, try examining the accessory bin. [Yup, we're doing it again!] The shoe bench is a supporter. It is undescribed. It is in the closet. The description is "A number of shoes -- hopefully an even one -- are heaped on this bench. [if the Hermes sandals are undescribed and the set of cothurni are undescribed]You particularly notice a pair of sandals like Hermes would wear, and a set of cothurni, like actors wear[end if][if the Hermes sandals are undescribed and the set of cothurni are described]You particularly notice a pair of sandals like Hermes would wear[end if][if the Hermes sandals are described and the set of cothurni are undescribed]You particularly notice a set of cothurni, like actors wear[end if][if the Hermes sandals are described and the set of cothurni are described]Nothing particularly stands out to you, though[end if]." Understand "shoes" as the shoe bench while the player is in the closet. Understand "heap" as the shoe bench while the player is in the closet. Instead of taking the shoe bench, say "There are too many shoes here to take all at once!" [And again!] The ear warmers are a chapeau. They are undescribed. They are plural-named. They are on the hat rack. The description of the ear warmers is "This doohicky is two swatches of fur attached to either end of a band -- were the evening a bit cooler, they'd be quite the thing for the [']ol whorlies!" They are unknown. Understand "warmer" as the ear warmers. After taking the ear warmers: Say "Taken."; Now the ear warmers are described. Instead of wearing the ear warmers: Increase ridiculous count by 1; Say "You fit the ear warmers around your head -- it feels like your head is being cradled by a bear, but not necessarily in an unpleasant fashion. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the ear warmers. [Let me just pause here to draw attention to what you've probably already noticed, which is that I've implemented all of the wearing stuff rules as Instead rules, meaning that I need to manually make the player wear the object every time instead of just taking advantage of the built-in actions like a normal person] After taking off the ear warmers: Now the player is carrying the ear warmers; Decrease the ridiculous count by 1; Say "Not without regret, you slip off the ear warmers." The silly floppy tam is a chapeau. It is undescribed. It is on the hat rack. The description of the silly floppy tam is "Now this number is right up your alley -- it's a lurid purple and fringed with tassels and bells." It is unknown. Understand "take all" as katamariing while the player is in the closet. Understand "take all" as katamariing while the player is in the bedroom. Katamariing is an action applying to nothing. Report katamariing: Say "There's rather more bric-a-brac here than you can comfortably hoover into the ol['] chiton in one go." [This is a special case rule, but I think OK since otherwise TAKE ALL works as you'd think. Would have been easier to just do the "understand... as a mistake" thing, but I don't think I knew how that worked yet] After taking the silly floppy tam: Say "Taken."; Now the silly floppy tam is described. [The joke is on me, since I'm pretty sure that taking an undescribed item makes it described] Instead of wearing the silly floppy tam: Increase the ridiculous count by 2; Say "The bright, floppy, be-belled tam settles upon your brow as though you were born to it. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the silly floppy tam. After taking off the silly floppy tam: Say "The tam jingles as you sweep it off the pate."; Now the player is carrying the silly floppy tam; Decrease the ridiculous count by 2. The crown of laurels is a chapeau. It is undescribed. It is on the hat rack. The description of the crown of laurels is "This wreath is a classic fancy-dress wheeze." It is unknown. Understand "wreath/laurel" as the crown of laurels. After taking the crown of laurels: Say "Taken."; Now the crown of laurels is described. [Why are the wearing rules Instead ones, and the taking off ones Afters? Beats me!] Instead of wearing the crown of laurels: Increase the ridiculous count by 1; Say "You settle the crown about your noble brow -- if Great-Aunt Eudoxia could see you now! [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the crown of laurels. After taking off the crown of laurels: Say "With reluctance, you doff the crown of laurels."; Now the player is carrying the crown of laurels; Decrease the ridiculous count by 1. The feather boa is a belt. It is undescribed. It is in the accessory bin. The description of the feather boa is "It reminds you of how Alky looked that morning after he decided to go drinking in the dye-works." It is unknown. After taking the feather boa: Say "Taken."; Now the feather boa is described. Instead of wearing the feather boa: Increase the ridiculous count by 2; Say "The boa adds a nice splash of color to your ensemble -- or maybe rather a tsunami than a splash. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the feather boa. After taking off the feather boa: Say "With a tinge of regret, you unclasp the boa from about your hips."; Now the player is carrying the feather boa; Decrease the ridiculous count by 2. The gold chain is a belt. It is undescribed. It is in the accessory bin. The description of the gold chain is "This is the kind of accessory that lends a high tone to any occasion." Instead of tying something to the gold chain, say "The chain doesn't look sturdy enough for that." Instead of tying the gold chain to something, say "The chain doesn't look sturdy enough for that." It is unknown. After taking the gold chain: Say "Taken."; Now the gold chain is described. Instead of wearing the gold chain: Increase the ridiculous count by 1; Say "The chain doesn't feature a buckle, so you're momentarily stymied as to how to keep the chain in place. You eventually give up and just knot it into place, somewhat undercutting the elegance of the effect. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the gold chain. After taking off the gold chain: Say "One mystery you've been initiated into this evening, as it turns out, is that unknotting a chain of gold is deucedly difficult, but eventually you manage it."; Now the player is carrying the gold chain; Decrease the ridiculous count by 1. The Hermes sandals are a pair of shoes. They are undescribed. They are plural-named. The indefinite article is "a pair of". They are on the shoe bench. The description of the Hermes sandals is "These may be sacrilegious, but you fancy the wings would set off your ankles quite nicely." They are unknown. Understand "sandal" as the Hermes sandals. After taking the Hermes sandals: Say "Taken."; Now the Hermes sandals are described. Instead of wearing the Hermes sandals: Increase the ridiculous count by 2; Say "You cinch the sandals onto your feet and shoot a furtive glance upward in case the need arises to dodge some divine displeasure. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the Hermes sandals. After taking off the Hermes sandals: Say "After struggling with the wings, you manage to get the sandals off."; Now the player is carrying the Hermes sandals; Decrease the ridiculous count by 2. The set of cothurni are a pair of shoes. They are undescribed. They are plural-named. The indefinite article is "a". They are on the shoe bench. The description of the cothurni is "You've seen stage actors wearing these leather-boot-ish numbers with a platform sole; looking taller both feeds the ego and makes one more visible to the cheap seats." Understand "boots" as the set of cothurni. They are unknown. Understand "sole" as the set of cothurni. After taking the set of cothurni: Say "Taken."; Now the set of cothurni are described. Instead of wearing the set of cothurni: Increase the ridiculous count by 1; Say "You pull on the boots, tottering a little as you adjust to the high soles. [if the ridiculous count is greater than 0 and the ridiculous count is less than 2.1][line break][line break]Your current ensemble looks a little silly.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 2.2 and the ridiculous count is less than 4.8][line break][line break]Your outfit is fairly ridiculous, but perhaps you've not quite attained the acme of silliness.[end if][if the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9][line break][line break]You must admit, your present accoutrements present quite the hilarious prospect.[end if]"; Now the player is wearing the set of cothurni. After taking off the set of cothurni: Say "You slide the cothurni off, relieved that now only children and the exceptionally short will be able to see your nose-hairs."; Now the player is carrying the set of cothurni; Decrease the ridiculous count by 1. Understand "remove all from/-- [someone]" as all-doffing. Understand "undress [someone]" as all-doffing. All-doffing is an action applying to one thing. Carry out all-doffing: If the noun is the pig, say "The pig's already down to his birthday suit." instead; If the noun is Hippy, say "Hippy doesn't have anything to her name." instead; If the noun is not the player, say "It's definitely not late enough in the evening to get that frisky!" instead; Repeat with X running through things worn by the player: If X is not the well-tailored chiton: Try taking off the X. Outlandish failsafe is a number that varies. Outlandish failsafe is 0. Every turn while outlandish failsafe is 1: Now outlandish failsafe is 0. Before questioning someone about while the player is not in the bedroom and the player is not in the chariot: If the noun is an animal: continue the action; If the noun is the placeholder pal: continue the action; If the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0 and the player is in the telesterion: Now the player is disruptive; continue the action; If the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9 and the outlandish failsafe is 0: Say "[noun] blinks at you, perhaps taken aback by your rather outlandish getup.[line break]"; Now the outlandish failsafe is 1; Now the player is disruptive; Continue the action. Before asking someone about while the player is not in the bedroom and the player is not in the chariot: If the noun is an animal: continue the action; If the noun is the placeholder pal: Continue the action; If the noun is the harpist: Continue the action; If the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0 and the player is in the telesterion: Now the player is disruptive; continue the action; If the ridiculous count is greater than 4.9: Say "[noun] blinks at you, perhaps taken aback by your rather outlandish getup.[line break]"; Now the player is disruptive; Continue the action. [...I think these rules are just to get that little "[noun] blinks at you..." tag when you talk to someone while wearing silly clothing? But why do we need that "failsafe" variable? I am confused] There is a room called the banquet hall. It is south of the peristyle. "In theory, the ceremony in the telesterion is the main event, but the spread on offer in this room make it a close-run thing.[if the crowd of gourmands is in the banquet hall] A crowd of your soon-to-be-fellow initiates mob the comestibles and imbibables spread across the tables, breaking into song when the mood hits and intermittently flit to one of the numberless couches for a lie-down when the system needs a touch of strengthening.[end if][if Alky is in the banquet hall] Alky is amidst the mob but somehow not of it, elegant and poised even as he [one of]gobbles down a handful of grapes[or]drains a bowl of wine to the dregs[or]gives a date a dainty nibble[or]contemplates an olive[at random].[end if][line break][line break]You could go back to the peristyle by going north if you prefer pillars to prandial delights." Instead of listening while the player is in the banquet hall, say "[if the crowd of gourmands is in the banquet hall]A few of the crowd are intent on singing drinking songs, but they're all having a go at different ones, so the effect is rather cacophonous[end if][if the crowd of gourmands is not in the banquet hall and the pig is not in the banquet hall]It's quiet now that everyone's fled outside[end if][if the pig is in the banquet hall]Even were you to close your eyes, the sounds the pig is making leave no doubt as to how much vim he's bringing to the task of gobbling down the goodies[end if]." Does the player mean questioning someone about the banquet food: it is very likely. Instead of questioning Alky about the placeholder pal: Say "'Oh, they're simply too dull to speak about,' Alky says with a dismissive wave of his hand."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning someone about the figs, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the banqueting olives, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the dates, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the grapes, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the massive roast, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the cheeses, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the cakes, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. Instead of questioning someone about the lump of honey cake, try questioning the noun about the banquet food. [If only there were a way to communicate to Inform that a single rule should be applied to a whole category of things at once!] Instead of questioning Alky about the banquet food: say "'The spiritual verities are all well and fine, but it's the spread that really makes these the only truly first-class mysteries,' Alky opines."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the pile of toothpicks: Say "Alky peers closely at your teeth. 'Yes, a toothpick seems a good idea,' he says."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the toothpick: Say "Alky peers closely at your teeth. 'Yes, a toothpick seems a good idea,' he says."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the pepper pot: Say "'Watch you don't over-season,' Alky warns, a serious look on his face."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking someone about "drink/drinks", try questioning the noun about the urns of wine. Instead of questioning Alky about the urns of wine: Say "'I suppose you're quite parched from spending so much time down below,' Alky says with sympathy. 'I know I am.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Alky about "Pericles", say "'My dear old guardian,' sniffs Alky. 'He helped get me in here, you know.'" Instead of asking Alky about "sneeze/sneezing/sneezes", say "'They say sneezing is an omen from the gods,' Alky sniffs, 'but please don't get any divine prophecy on the canap[unicode 0233]s.'" Instead of asking Alky about "hiccup/hiccups/hiccuping", say "Alky's opinions about hiccuping are comprehensive, encompassing questions both of physiology and of etiquette, so you're rather lost by the end." Instead of asking Alky about "ceremony/initiation/telesterion", say "'All that's Puffy's department,' Alky says, giving a significant glance back at the food and wine to indicate which aspect of the mysteries he most concerns himself with." Instead of asking Alky about "the ceremony/initiation/telesterion", say "'All that's Puffy's department,' Alky says, giving a significant glance back at the food and wine to indicate which aspect of the mysteries he most concerns himself with." Instead of questioning Alky about the silly floppy tam: say "'Oh yes, that suits you,' Alky says, and you preen under the compliment."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the feather boa: say "'Oh yes, that suits you,' Alky says, and you preen under the compliment."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the crown of laurels: say "Alky raises an eyebrow. 'It might be a bit premature for victory laurels, no?'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the gold chain: say "'I'm not sure that's real gold,' Alky says slowly, 'but all the same you might put it back once you're finished.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the Hermes sandals: say "'Now that's quite the look,' Alky says admiringly."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about the set of cothurni: say "'Oh, old Sophy wasn't sure where those had wound up,' Alky says. 'You can keep them, he got a new pair.'"; now the player is disruptive. ["Sophy" being Sophocles, of course] Instead of questioning Alky about the ear warmers, say "'Those are quite silly,' is Alky's crisp judgment. 'And they must make it rather hard to know what's going on, eh?' [if the player is wearing the ear warmers]Or at least that's what you think he says, you can't really make him out.[end if]". Instead of asking Alky about "blooey", say "'Now that's remarkably silly,' Alky says, returning to his wine." Instead of asking Alky about "saying blooey", say "'Now that's remarkably silly,' Alky says, returning to his wine." Instead of asking Alky about "potnia", say "'Oh yes, I recall that bit,' Alky says. 'The trick is all in the nose.'" Instead of asking Alky about "mighty potnia", say "'Oh yes, I recall that bit,' Alky says. 'The trick is all in the nose.'" Instead of asking Alky about "saying potnia", say "'Oh yes, I recall that bit,' Alky says. 'The trick is all in the nose.'" Instead of asking Alky about "saying mighty potnia", say "'Oh yes, I recall that bit,' Alky says. 'The trick is all in the nose.'" Instead of asking Alky about "silence", say "'You couldn't possibly be asking for help staying quiet,' says Alky -- it's very clearly not a question, so you don't press the matter." Instead of asking Alky about "comedy/jokes/joke/joking/hilarity/laugh/laughs/laughing/laughter/entertain/entertainment/humor", say "'I'd think that'd be one of your areas of specialty,' Alky says guilelessly. 'Look a fool, say some foolish things, you'd be a natural.'" Instead of giving the cup to Alky: Say "[if the cup is empty]You find the empty cup a bit dull, really, and your tolerance for dullness far exceeds Alky's. Best not to.[end if][if the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water]Alky guzzles the wine, then gives you a smile and your cup back.[end if][if the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine]Alky's mid-gulp when he realizes you've given him water, at which point the gulp turns into a sputter. He hands you back your cup with a laugh: 'Well done, what a prank!'"; Now the cup is empty. [Oops, looks like I got those conditions backwards! Seems unsporting to fix the bug now] In the banquet hall are some people called the crowd of gourmands. They are scenery. Instead of questioning the crowd of gourmands about something, say "These fellows are much too intent on their stomachs to bother with you." Instead of asking the crowd of gourmands about something, say "These fellows are much too intent on their stomachs to bother with you." The description of the crowd of gourmands is "There are rather a lot of your pals all milling about here -- say, there's old [one of]Stinker[or]Monty[or]Biffy[or]Tuppy[or]Gussie[or]Bingo[or]Corky[or]Nobby[or]Poppy[or]Oofy[at random] [one of]of Lydia[or]Timogenes[or]the Boeotian[or]the Areopagite[or]Eupolis[or]Cretensis[or]of Laconia[at random]! -- but they seem much more interested in their digestion than in you (not that you suppose you could blame them, were the situations reversed)." Understand "mob/initiates/already-initiated/fellows" as the crowd of gourmands. Instead of doing anything to the crowd of gourmands, say "These fellows are much too intent on their stomachs to bother with you." The placeholder pal is a man. It is undescribed. It is in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the placeholder pal is in the banquet hall]Everyone here seems rather focused on moving delicacies from table to tummy as efficiently as possible.[end if][if the placeholder pal is in the portico]It's hard to pick anyone out of this mob for more than a moment.[end if]". Instead of doing anything other than examining to the placeholder pal, say "[if the placeholder pal is in the banquet hall]Everyone here seems rather focused on moving delicacies from table to tummy as efficiently as possible, and you don't have the heart to interrupt them.[end if][if the placeholder pal is in the portico]Your past experience in trying to calm a mob is that it doesn't work, and then you wind swept up in the fun and need to endure a lecture from your Great-Aunt. Best not to tempt fate.[end if]". It is unknown. Instead of questioning the placeholder pal about something, say "[if the placeholder pal is in the banquet hall]All these fellows are much too intent on their stomachs to bother with you[otherwise]The overall mob-like atmosphere doesn't exactly permit conversation[end if]." Instead of asking the placeholder pal about something, say "[if the placeholder pal is in the banquet hall]All these fellows are much too intent on their stomachs to bother with you[otherwise]The overall mob-like atmosphere doesn't exactly permit conversation[end if]." Understand "Stinker/Monty/Biffy/Tuppy/Gussie/Bingo/Corky/Nobby/Poppy/Oofy/Lydia/Timogenes/Boeotian/Areopagite/Eupolis/Cretensis/Laconia" as the placeholder pal. Understand "Stinker/Monty/Biffy/Tuppy/Gussie/Bingo/Corky/Nobby/Poppy/Oofy Lydia/Timogenes/Boeotian/Areopagite/Eupolis/Cretensis/Laconia" as the placeholder pal. Understand "Stinker/Monty/Biffy/Tuppy/Gussie/Bingo/Corky/Nobby/Poppy/Oofy the/of Lydia/Timogenes/Boeotian/Areopagite/Eupolis/Cretensis/Laconia" as the placeholder pal. [So the idea here is that there's the crowd, and then if the player tries to interact with one of the randomly-named people who get mentioned when examining the crowd, the "placeholder pal" is there to preempt things. I think that basically works?] The couches are an object. They are in the banquet hall. They are scenery. The description is "The couches themselves are rather quotidian, but some of the jewels of Attic society are sprawled recumbent across their cushions -- under other circs, you'd be star-struck to be sharing air with [one of]Stinker[or]Monty[or]Puffy[or]Biffy[or]Tuppy[or]Gussie[or]Bingo[or]Corky[or]Nobby[or]Poppy[or]Oofy[at random] [one of]of Lydia[or]Timogenes[or]the Boeotian[or]the Areopagite[or]Eupolis[or]Cretensis[or]of Laconia[at random]!" Understand "couch" as the couches while the player is in the banquet hall. Instead of sitting the couches, say "You're not yet so far gone as to need a nap (the night is young)." The banquet food is in the banquet hall. The banquet food is edible and scenery. The description of the banquet food is "If you had any doubts about the divine nature of the mysteries, this sm[unicode 0246]rg[unicode 0229]sbord would remove all doubt. There's more kinds of food and libation here than you can count (admittedly a low-ish number, as the somewhat-clunky Attic numeral system isn't doing you any favors on this score). Olives, dates, figs, and grapes, each plumper than the last, overflow the tables, and that's just the roundish things! There's a massive roast and dozens of cheeses -- oh, you could get used to this. [line break][line break]A pepper pot and a sampling-platter of honeyed cakes round things out, and some toothpicks are neatly piled at the far end of the table[if the cup is undescribed] next to a solitary cup (everyone else must have taken theirs already)[end if].". Instead of eating the banquet food, try taking the banquet food. Understand "prandial/-- comestibles/edibles/table/tables/smorgasbord/buffet/feast/delights/delight/spread/provender" as the banquet food. It is unknown. Understand "plate" as the banquet food while the plate of food is nowhere. Instead of smelling the banquet food, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]Smelling the food isn't quite as good as eating it, but it's a close-run thing[otherwise]You can say with confidence that the food has smelled better[end if]." The banquet food is broken. Before examining the banquet food: Now the banquet food is unbroken. [...I think I wanted to track whether the player had examined the food yet before letting them eat anything, to make sure they examined the table and saw the important objects there, but instead of using Inform's built-in knowledge of whether an action has completed, or taking 15 seconds to write a new property, I just used the broken/unbroken property I'd created for some of the other puzzles. Awful even by my standards!] Instead of taking the banquet food: If the pig is in the banquet hall: Say "What with the pig noisily gobbling down everything in sight, you find you've rather lost your appetite."; Stop the action; If the plate of food is nowhere and the banquet food is broken: Say "Better to survey the provender before you start digging in -- wouldn't want to miss the best bits!"; Stop the action; If the plate of food is nowhere and the banquet food is unbroken: Say "You make up a plate from the goodies on offer."; Now the player has the plate of food; Otherwise: Say "You've already made up a plate." The plate of food is an object. It is nowhere. It is edible. The description is "A plate of scrummy delights -- ooh, that [one of]date[or]olive[or]grape[or]bit of roast[or]cheese[at random] looks good!" Instead of smelling the plate of food, say "Smelling the food isn't quite as good as eating it, but it's a close-run thing." It is unknown. Does the player mean examining the plate of food: it is very unlikely. Instead of eating the plate of food: Say "You wolf down the goodies -- when this is all over, you must find the chef to offer your compliments (and possibly poach them for your club in Athens)."; Now the plate of food is nowhere. Instead of giving the plate of food to a man, say "If [second noun] is hungry, he can make up his own plate -- this one's yours!" Instead of giving the lump of honey cake to a man, say "If [second noun] wants some cake, he's certainly free to get some for himself -- this piece is yours!" The banqueting olives are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]These olives are oiled and enticing, like several chorus-girls you've known[otherwise]The pig's rather had his way with the olives, and you're quite sure he didn't de-pit them first -- you're concerned for his digestion[end if].". The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the banqueting olives, try taking the banquet food. Understand "olive" as the banqueting olives while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. Instead of eating the banqueting olives: If the pig is not in the banquet hall, say "[one of]You pop an olive into your mouth and crunch down in anticipatory delight, remembering the pit half a second too late. The pain that jolts your teeth isn't quite enough to overcome the pleasure of eating such a fine olive, but it's a close-run thing[or]Chastened, you nibble at this next olive with a jealous regard for your tooth-enamel[stopping]." instead; If the pig is in the banquet hall, say "The pig's eaten a solid number of the olives, and now that he has the leavings aren't exactly appetizing." instead. [Yes, that's an instead rule with two nested insteads under it] The dates are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]These are better than any date you've ever been on[otherwise]The pig definitely appears to have enjoyed the dates -- there are very few left[end if]." Instead of eating the dates, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]The date is sweeter than a Great-Aunt trying to get you to do an inconvenient favor[otherwise]You've put up with some awful dates in your time, but now that the pig has rather despoiled them you've found your limit[end if]." The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the dates, try taking the banquet food. Understand "date" as the dates while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. [Thankfully I realized that was superfluous by the time I wrote the second of these, so I just fell back on my usual "overcomplicated description" MO] The figs are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]You've never wanted what's behind a fig leaf half as much as you've wanted these[otherwise]The pig has left chewed-up bits of fig strewed all over the table, fleshy and leaking seeds[end if]." Instead of eating the figs, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]Oooh -- you'd give more than a fig for another of these figs![otherwise]In their post-pig state, the figs don't so much trigger salivation as they do your gag reflex.[end if]". The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the figs, try taking the banquet food. Understand "fig" as the figs while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. The grapes are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]These grapes look great![otherwise]The pig has chewed his way through the grapes, little discriminating between fruit and stem.[end if]". Instead of eating the grapes, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]For a moment, you ponder the eternal question -- peeled or unpeeled -- before deciding that, while peeling grapes one by one might be a wheeze once you're initiated into the mysteries of immortality, for now life is too short for that sort of thing[otherwise]Upon reflection, while you'll take your grapes either peeled or unpeeled, you draw the line at covered-in-pig-saliva[end if]." The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the grapes, try taking the banquet food. Understand "grape" as the grapes while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. The massive roast is scenery. It is in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]You run through the admittedly-scanty competition before concluding that yes, this is the most enticing you've ever seen a goat look[otherwise]The pig has mostly steered clear of the roast -- maybe he's a vegetarian? -- but he has tromped all over the poor goat[end if]." Instead of eating the roast, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]You cut off a bit of the roast, and find it's just as good as you imagined[otherwise]Essence of pig-hoof is not your favored flavoring[end if]." Instead of taking the roast, try taking the banquet food. Understand "goat" as the massive roast while the player is in the banquet hall. It is unknown. The cheeses are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]It doesn't get any feta than this[otherwise]The pig's depredations have turned the cheeses into so much de-brie[end if]." Instead of eating the cheeses, say "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]Damn gouda cheese[otherwise]Cheddar think again[end if]." The indefinite article is "some". Instead of taking the cheeses, try taking the banquet food. Understand "cheese" as the cheeses while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. The honey cakes are scenery. They are in the banquet hall. The description is "These cakes are dripping with honey, and have more tiers than the Theater of Dionysus. [if the pig is in the banquet hall]Fortunately, the pig has yet to work his way down to this end of the table, so you can still help yourself to a spot of dessert.[end if]". Instead of eating the cakes, say "The honey in the cake is enough to glue your lips together, but fortunately, you remember that nose-breathing is an option just in time." The indefinite article is "some". Understand "cake/platter/sampling/sampling-platter platter/--" as the cakes while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. They are plural-named. Instead of taking the cakes: If the lump of honey cake is nowhere: Say "You can't help yourself -- you grab a big lump of honey cake in case you want a nibble later on."; Now the player has the lump of honey cake; Otherwise: Say "No need to get greedy!". The lump of honey cake is an object. It is nowhere. The description is "This is a massive glob of honey cake -- there are raisins and nuts but the major ingredient is the honey, sticky and delicious." Instead of smelling the lump of honey cake, say "Delectable!" Instead of eating the lump of honey cake, say "[one of]You take a giant bite out of the delicious cake -- somehow, the massive glob doesn't seem any smaller (though your tummy is much fuller).[or]You can still feel the last lump like a shotput in your tummy.[stopping]". It is unknown. Understand "honeycake" as the lump of honey cake. Understand "honeyed cake" as the lump of honey cake. Instead of squeezing the lump of honey cake, say "You think you could get a good dollop of honey this way, but unless you directed it somewhere you'd just have sticky hands." Instead of putting the lump of honey cake on something, say "That would just make a sticky mess." The pile of toothpicks is in the banquet hall. It is scenery. The description is "A [if the pig is not in the banquet hall]nice [end if]little pile of toothpicks, for the gentleman who wishes to engage in some post-prandial hygiene, or equally, some post-prandial fidgeting. [if the pig is in the banquet hall]The energetic way the pig is guzzling down the food at the other end of the table has rather upset the pile, but there are still clean toothpicks on offer.[end if]". It is unknown. Understand "toothpick" as the pile of toothpicks while the toothpick is nowhere. Instead of wearing the pile of toothpicks: If the toothpick is not nowhere, say "Perhaps better to do that with your toothpick rather than mess up the ones others might want to use?" instead; Say "You pluck a toothpick from the pile, and carefully -- very carefully! -- you use it to prop your left eyelid open. After a bit of fiddling, you get it wedged in there pretty good! It's not exactly comfortable, but there's little risk you'll nod off while it's there."; Now the player wears the toothpick; Set pronouns from the toothpick; Now the toothpick is described. [I was very proud of myself for doing the "set pronouns from" trick here] The carrying requirements rule does nothing when wearing the pile of toothpicks. [This is to make it so you don't have the take the toothpick first, I think since I wanted to avoid showing the implicit action -- could have just suppressed the output rather than monkeying with the action rules though!] Does the player mean taking the pile of toothpicks while the player carries the toothpick: it is very likely. Instead of taking the pile of toothpicks: If the toothpick is nowhere: Say "You pluck a toothpick from the pile."; Now the player has the toothpick; Set pronouns from the toothpick; Now the toothpick is described; Otherwise: Say "It's not explicitly a one-per-fellow system, but you'd feel greedy abstracting another toothpick when the first is still perfectly good." The toothpick is nowhere. It is wearable. It is undescribed. Understand "tooth/-- pick" as the toothpick. The description is "A tidy little number for keeping the chompers agleam." Understand "put [toothpick] in eye" as wearing. Understand "put [toothpick] in left eye" as wearing. Understand "open eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "open left eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "put [toothpick] in eyelid" as wearing. Understand "put [toothpick] in left eyelid" as wearing. Understand "open eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "open left eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "prop eye with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "prop eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "prop left eye with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "prop left eyelid with [toothpick]" as wearing. Understand "take [toothpick] out of eye" as taking off. It is unknown. Understand "prop left/-- eye/eyelid/eyes/eyelids open/-- with [toothpick]" as wearing. Workarounding is an action applying to nothing. Understand "open left/-- eye/eyelid/eyes/eyelids with the/tooth/-- pick/toothpick" as workarounding. Instead of workarounding, try wearing the toothpick. [...I have no idea what the idea here is -- shouldn't this be redundant with the regular action?] After printing the name of the toothpick when taking inventory: If the player is wearing the toothpick, say " (currently propping open your left eye)". The left eye is part of the player. It is undescribed. The description is "Your left eye has always been the droopier of the pair -- its downward flutter is an invariable signal of an oncoming nap. [if the player is wearing the toothpick]Currently a toothpick is propping it open, warding off sleep at the price of some unpleasantness to your soft tissues." Instead of inserting something into the left eye, try wearing the noun. Understand "left/eye/-- eyelid/eye-socket/eyesocket/socket/eyelids/eyes" as the left eye. Instead of opening the left eye, say "You send your lids as far heavenwards as you can manage, but you can't keep up the effort for long." Understand "open [left eye] with [toothpick]" as a mistake ("Your eyes are already open, but perhaps you'd like to try putting the toothpick in your eye socket?") [This seems awfully anal for such a silly puzzle!] Instead of glueing the left eye to the lump of honey cake, say "You think you're on to something with this physically-keeping-your-eye-open wheeze, but you lack the fine motor control required to ensure that you glue your eye open rather than closed." Instead of glueing the lump of honey cake to the left eye, try glueing the left eye to the lump of honey cake. Instead of putting the lump of honey cake on the left eye, try glueing the left eye to the lump of honey cake. [Yes, I got distracted while writing up the open-eye-with-toothpick gag by thinking of this glueing thing and just threw it in in the middle] Rule for printing the name of the toothpick: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. Understand "pick teeth with/-- [toothpick]" as fidgeting with. Understand "pick teeth with/--- [toothpick]" as fidgeting with. Understand "clean teeth with/-- [toothpick]" as fidgeting with. Does the player mean fidgeting with the toothpick: it is very likely. Instead of fidgeting with the toothpick: If the player is carrying the toothpick, say "You insert the toothpick as far back into the ivories as seems safe, and give a few exploratory wiggles."; Otherwise: Say "You need to be holding the toothpick to do anything with it!". Instead of putting the toothpick on the left eye, try wearing the toothpick. Understand "put [toothpick] under [left eye]" as putting it on. Instead of wearing the toothpick: Say "Carefully -- very carefully! -- you use the toothpick to prop your left eyelid open. After a bit of fiddling, you get it wedged in there pretty good! It's not exactly comfortable, but there's little risk you'll nod off while it's there."; Now the player is wearing the toothpick. After taking off the toothpick: Say "Carefully -- even more carefully! -- you pull the toothpick clear of your eye, which immediately starts to droop."; Now the player has the toothpick; Now the player is sleepy. Every turn while the player is wearing the toothpick: Now the player is wakeful. The pepper pot is in the banquet hall. It is scenery. It is edible. The description of the pepper pot is "A nice little pot of pepper, in case you think you're a better-seasoned seasoner than the cooks. [if the pig is in the banquet hall]Fortunately, the pig hasn't gotten to this end of the table yet, so you can still sample the pepper if you like.[end if]". Instead of taking the pepper pot, try eating the pepper pot. Instead of smelling the pepper pot, try eating the pepper pot. It is unknown. Instead of eating the pepper pot: Say "You take a pinch and sniff -- ooh, now that's peppery!"; Now the player is sneezing; Stop the action. Instead of putting the pepper on: Say "[one of]Before you meddle with the divine perfection of this food, you figure you'd best take a sniff to make sure you gauge the spiciness right.[or]No, that pepper is too peppery -- you shan't risk it.[stopping]" Sneezing count is a number that varies. Sneezing count is 0. Every turn when the player is sneezing and the player is not in the underworld and the player can see the player and Puffy is not in the cellar and ritual count is greater than -1: If sneezing count is 4: Now sneezing count is 0; If sneezing count is 3: If the player is sneeze-suppressed: increment sneezing count; Otherwise: Say "'Ah-CHOO!' Your sneeze sounds like [one of]a goose's honk[or]a lamb's bleat[or]Zeus when he has a cold[or]Pythagoras after one bean dinner too many[or]Ares falling down the stairs[at random].[if the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is greater than 0][line break]Some of the fellows in the crowd titter at your rather ungainly nasal explosion.[end if]"; Now the player is disruptive; increment sneezing count; If the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is greater than 0: Increment joking count; If sneezing count is 2: Say "This definitely feels like a sneeze coming on."; Increment sneezing count; If sneezing count is 1: Say "[one of]You've got a little tickle in your nose.[or]There's that tickle again.[stopping]"; Increment sneezing count; If sneezing count is 0: Increment sneezing count. [Oh, lordy. You're probably looking at all those conditions and thinking, wait, huh? The player can always see the player, and Puffy is never in the cellar, so why include those? ...so what happened is, I needed this every turn rule to fire before various others, to make sure that sneezing happened before other stuff in the turn. This is a simple thing to manage if you read the docs about rulebooks, but of course I didn't -- but I did read the note that rules with more conditions are evaluated before those that come later, including the caveat that it's bad practice to rely on that, so I should have known better!] The cup is in the banquet hall. It is a fluid container. It is undescribed. The description is "It's not much to look at, but you're more concerned with what's in it:[if the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water] disappointingly, it's only water.[end if][if the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine] a bit of that rather nice red.[end if][if the cup is empty] sadly, currently it's empty, so you're just back to it being not much to look at.". It is opaque. Rule for printing the name of the cup: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. After printing the name of the cup when taking inventory: If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine: Say " (full of wine)"; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water: Say " (full of water)". [There must have been a more elegant way of doing this] Before taking the cup: Now the cup is described; Continue the action. Understand "wine" as the cup while the player is carrying the cup and the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine. Understand "water" as the cup while the player is carrying the cup and the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water. The drink count is a number that varies. The drink count is 0. Instead of drinking the cup: If the cup is empty: Say "You take a confident swig from the cup -- yes, you've certainly mastered step two of the process, so it's just down to the pesky filling-it-up-first part."; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine: If the drink count is 5: Say "The last time you drank this much, you wound up stealing a hoplite's helmet and being hauled before the law-courts, so perhaps it's best to give the temperance wheeze a go for now." instead; Say "You toss back the cup. [if the drink count is 4]The wine is starting to make the world a bit fuzzy[otherwise]Now that's the stuff[end if][if the player is sneezing] -- and it seems to have washed out the tickle in your throat, too[end if]!"; Now the player is unsneezing; Now the sneezing count is 0; Now the player is hiccuping; Now the hiccuping count is 0; Increment drink count; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water: Say "You toss back the cup. Water's not your usual wheeze, but dashed if that wasn't refreshing[if the player is sneezing] -- and it seems to have washed out your throat, too[end if]![if the player is hiccuping][line break]After a moment, you're pretty sure that it's fixed your hiccups, too.[end if]"; Now the player is unsneezing; Now the sneezing count is 0; Now the player is unhiccuping; Now the hiccuping count is 0; Now the cup is empty. Instead of inserting something into the cup, say "The cup is for beverages and nothing else." The urns of wine are in the banquet hall. They are a fluid container. They are undescribed. They are everfull. The liquid of the urns of wine is wine. The description is "Several large urns of wine, with convenient bowls set out to facilitate sanitary libation. [if the pig is in the banquet hall]Thankfully, the pig hasn't made it this far down the table yet, so the urns are intact and more or less clean.[end if]". Instead of taking the urns of wine, try drinking the urns of wine. Understand "imbibables/libations/drinks/libation/bowl/bowls" as the urns of wine while the player is in the banquet hall. They are unknown. Instead of drinking the urns of wine: If the drink count is 5: Say "The last time you drank this much, you wound up stealing a hoplite's helmet and being hauled before the law-courts, so perhaps it's best to give the temperance wheeze a go for now." instead; Say "[if the drink count is 4]The wine is starting to make the world a bit fuzzy[otherwise]Now that's the stuff[end if][if the player is sneezing] -- and it seems to have washed out the tickle in your throat, too[end if]!"; Now the player is unsneezing; Now the sneezing count is 0; Now the player is hiccuping; Increment drink count. Hiccuping count is a number that varies. Hiccuping count is 0. Every turn when the player is hiccuping and the player is in the Temple of Eleusis and the player can see the player and Puffy is in the Telesterion and ritual count is greater than -1: If hiccuping count is 3: Now hiccuping count is 0; If hiccuping count is 2: Say "[one of]You emit a small 'hic' -- that wine must have gone to your head![or]You hiccup again.[stopping]"; Now the player is disruptive; increment hiccuping count; Otherwise: Increment hiccuping count. Instead of scaring the player when the player is hiccuping: Say "You try to yell to give yourself a good scare. It isn't working at first since you know that's what you're doing, but then you forget, and the next yell takes you by surprise -- yes, that did it, no more hiccups!"; Now the hiccuping count is 0; Now the player is unhiccuping. There is a room called the Telesterion. It is east of the peristyle. "You'd rate this as one of your grander halls, with pillars towering upwards to a dimly-visible and smoky ceiling, nicely turned-out furniture lending a note of class, [if the spilled kykeon is nowhere]and a crowd of the already-initiated bustling about to witness the ceremonies. Some tasteful harp music is piping in from a low grating at the back of the hall, behind a cleared area that's doing its best impression of a stage. [end if][if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]and now, post-ceremony, an overall air of ravishment and mayhem, with the large pool of kykeon spilling out of its ceremonial jug the most obvious factor depressing property values. [end if][line break][line break]The peristyle is back to the west.[if the Machon cup-buffer is 1][line break][line break]Machon must have finished drinking the cup, as he's placed it on a table in case you want it back. He already looks a little less alert.[end if]". The Telesterion is uncommented. Instead of smelling while the player is in the telesterion, say "There's a not-unpleasant fug of incense hanging about[if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion], helping mask the god-awful stench of the kykeon[end if]." Rule for gawking at the Telesterion: Say "That thin bloke Alky called 'Puffy' greets you as you enter. 'Welcome to the telesterion,' he says, and while you're revolving that in the noodle (you figure out the 'far away' part straightaway, but the rest is a bit flummoxing), you somewhat lose track of the rest of the rigmarole. The gist seems to be that you've a few more hoops to jump through, of a ceremonial nature, and you can get the ball rolling by asking the said Puffy about the said ritual."; Now Puffy is described. In the telesterion are some people called the audience. They are scenery. The description is "A whole mess of fellows are here to watch you go through your initiation.[if the ritual stage is 3] Right now they're looking at you expectantly, hoping for some diversion.[end if]". Understand "crowd" and "fellows" and "mess" and "mob" and "initiates" and "already-initiated" as the audience while the player is in the telesterion. Instead of doing something other than examining to the audience, say "Their remit is to spectate your initiation, and they don't seem inclined to do anything beyond that." Instead of asking the audience about something, say "Their remit is to spectate your initiation, and they don't seem inclined to do anything beyond that." Instead of questioning the audience about something, say "Their remit is to spectate your initiation, and they don't seem inclined to do anything beyond that." Instead of telling the audience about something, say "Their remit is to spectate your initiation, and they don't seem inclined to do anything beyond that." Instead of answering the audience that something, say "Their remit is to spectate your initiation, and they don't seem inclined to do anything beyond that." The grating is in the telesterion. It is scenery. The description is "You peer through the grating, and see [if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]the harpist has fled in the confusion[otherwise]a harp player in a side-room, plucking the old catguts with a look of concentration on his face[end if]." Instead of doing something other than examining to the grating, say "[if the spilled kykeon is nowhere]The harpist really looks like he doesn't want to be bothered[otherwise]Messing about with a grating isn't high on your priorities right now[end if]." Understand "grate" as the grating while the player is in the telesterion. The harpist is in the Telesterion. He is a man. He is undescribed. The description is "You peer through the grating and see a harp player in a side-room, plucking the old catguts with a look of concentration on his face." Instead of doing something other than examining to the harpist, say "The harpist really looks like he doesn't want to be bothered." Understand "harp" and "harp/-- player" as the harpist while the player is in the telesterion. Instead of listening while the player is in the Telesterion, say "[if the spilled kykeon is nowhere]You enjoy the harp music for a moment, staying mostly on tune as you hum along.[end if][if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]There's an unearthly quiet in the telesterion now.[end if][if Machon is asleep]The effect is somewhat undermined by Machon's snoring.[end if]". The stage is in the telesterion. It is scenery. The description is "[if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]The empty stage has been rather spattered with kykeon -- the stuff's everywhere. [end if][if the spilled kykeon is nowhere]Puffy stands in this open area, where the ceremonious proceedings are meant to eventuate. [end if][if the basin is in the telesterion]Atop a table near the stage, there's a shallow basin and a small platter. [end if][if the ritual count is not 0 and the ritual stage is not 3]You feel a bit self-conscious, though perhaps a bit self-important too, now that you're in the middle of it.[end if]". Understand "area" and "open area" as the stage while the player is in the Telesterion. Instead of entering the stage, say "[if the ritual count is not 0 and the ritual stage is not 3]You're already in the middle of things.[otherwise]Your Great-Aunt has impressed upon you that you shouldn't hog the limelight more than is necessary (or at all, so far as she's concerned)." Understand "stand in/on [stage]" as entering. The furniture is scenery. It is in the Telesterion. The description is "You're certainly no expert, but the construction, varnishing, and upholstering of these tables and couches strike you as an example of carpentological excellence. [if the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion]Indeed, it's all held up rather better to the exigencies of the riot than you would have feared.[otherwise]While you enjoy their aesthetics, your somewhat-plump cousin Machon, sprawled heavily across one of the couches, is probably more appreciative of their structural integrity.[end if]". Understand "couch" and "couches" and "table" and "tables" as the furniture while the player is in the Telesterion. Instead of sitting the furniture, say "You're not yet so far gone as to need a nap (the night is young)." The small platter is a supporter. It is undescribed. It is in the Telesterion. The description is "This dish is a plausible contender for the least-exciting snack plate you've ever seen -- [if the pennyroyal is on the platter]the pennyroyal and somewhat-manky barley you recovered from below are all that's on offer.[otherwise]it's completely bare of comestibles." Understand "dish" as the small platter while the player is in the telesterion. Instead of taking the small platter, say "No thank you." Instead of putting something on the small platter, say "You're quite sure [the noun] isn't meant to be part of the ritual paraphernalia." The shallow basin is an opaque container. It is undescribed. It is in the Telesterion. The description is "Quite a nice piece, Attic, red-figure, some elegant treatment of Dionysiac motifs -- probably school of Phintias? -- though there were some flaws in the firing that will lead to cracking in a few years['] time (you have a Great-Uncle in the business, a fellow picks these things up).[if the pennyroyal is in the basin] It holds the crushed pennyroyal and some grains of past-its-sell-by barley.[otherwise] It's currently empty, allowing you to appreciate the painter's artistry all the more." Understand "bowl" as the shallow basin while the player is in the telesterion. Instead of taking the shallow basin, say "You're tempted, but with all these people watching there's a reasonably chance they'll be able to figure out who nicked it." Instead of inserting something into the shallow basin, say "You've spent enough time gathering bric-a-brac for this shindig, so if Puffy needs something else to go in the basin, he can put it there himself!" Instead of taking the pennyroyal while the player is in the Telesterion, say "Munching on greenery lacks appeal, given what's on offer in the banquet hall." Instead of eating the pennyroyal while the player is in the Telesterion, say "Munching on greenery lacks appeal, given what's on offer in the banquet hall." Ritual stage is a number that varies. Ritual stage is 10. Ritual count is a number that varies. Ritual count is 0. [As promised, here are those ritual stage/count variables! Ritual stage tracks which step of the ritual you're on; the count governs timing for things like the call-and-response puzzle. No, there's no comment or table that I wrote up to nail down which numbers correspond to which step, I just came up with all the logic as I was writing it. Fun to debug!] Frustration is a number that varies. Frustration is 0. Joking count is a number that varies. Joking count is 0. Singing count is a number that varies. Singing count is 0. Dancing count is a number that varies. Dancing count is 0. After going from the peristyle to the Telesterion while the ritual stage is not 3 and the Telesterion has been visited and the ritual stage is not 98: Say "As you enter, Puffy bustles over to you, officious. 'Are you ready to get on with the initiation?' he asks. After a moment's pause that awkwardly stretches to two moments, you realize this wasn't rhetorical."; If the player consents: Say "[line break]Puffy leads you into the Telesterion and into the stage area."; Now the ritual count is 1; Otherwise: Say "[line break]'Hrmph,' Puffy sniffs, 'ask me about the ritual when you are ready.'"; Now the joking count is 0; Now the singing count is 0; Now the dancing count is 0; Try looking. Every turn while the player is sneeze-suppressed: Now the player is sneeze-enabled. Every turn while the player is disruptive: Now the player is undisruptive. Before going from the Telesterion to the peristyle while the ritual stage is not 3: If the ritual count is 0, continue the action; Otherwise: Say "[if the ritual stage is 0 and the ritual count is greater than 4]'I don't think you're quite getting it,' Puffy tsks in disappointment as you leave the room. 'Perhaps a snack and a drink would help?' He turns away.[end if][if the ritual stage is 1 or the ritual stage is 0 and the ritual count is less than 5]'Where are you going?' Puffy sputters after you as you exit, 'we'll have to start this bit over!'[end if][if the ritual stage is 2]'Yes, best give it a breather,' Puffy advises as he sees you about to make your exit, 'come back when you've fine-tuned your act and your persona.'[end if]"; Now the ritual count is 0; Now frustration is 0; Continue the action. Every turn while the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 0: If the ritual count is 6 and frustration is 4: Say "'I don't think you're quite getting it,' Puffy tsks in disappointment. 'Perhaps a snack and a drink would help?' He turns away."; Now ritual count is 0; Now frustration is 0; If the ritual count is 6: Say "'Great son?' Puffy asks again. [one of]He's got a look on his face like he's said the words too much and they're starting to get blurry, if a word can get blurry, which you have to concede seems unlikely.[or]He looks at you, hopeful yet wary.[or]You're sure that this time you'll get it![or]Frankly at this point you'd call this son something other than great.[or]You feel like you're in one of those dreams where everything happens the same way over and over.[or]You're beginning to feel that this Potnia should go soak her head.[at random]"; increment frustration; If the ritual count is 5: Say "'Who bore a great son?' Puffy intones in your general direction."; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 4: Say "[one of]You've got the bit between your teeth vis a vis this call and response wheeze now, and you keep pace all through some balderdash Puffy spouts about rains and children and flowers and all sorts of soppy nonsense. But then he draws you up short: 'All right, this last part's a little different,' Puffy says (you hesitate, about to open your mouth and repeat this back too, before he dissuades you with a quick shake of the head). 'Now in a moment I'll ask who bore a great son, and you say mighty Potnia.'[or]You breeze through the easy bits, until once again you face that 'mighty Potnia' business.[stopping]"; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 3 and frustration is 3: Say "Puffy's shoulders sag as he realizes that for reasons of your own you're just not going to say 'blooey.' 'We... we can try again later,' he murmurs, to disappointment from the crowd."; Now ritual count is 0; Now frustration is 0; If the ritual count is 3: Say "[one of]Puffy, noticing that you haven't gotten it, whispers 'blooey' again, except 'blooey' is a hard word to whisper so he rather raspberries it out.[or]'Blooey,' Puffy prompts you.[stopping]"; Increment frustration; If the ritual count is 2: Say "Puffy says 'blooey,' not without a sour glare at Machon, and looks at you expectantly."; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 1: Say "[one of]'The ritual starts with some call and response,' Puffy says. At your blank look he elaborates: 'I'll say something, then you repeat it back. Here, let's try to make sure you've got it, I'll say...' As he hesitates, Machon pipes up, 'how about blooey!' Puffy, with a pained wince, acquiesces.[or]'Now just repeat everything I say,' Puffy says. You can do that![stopping]"; Increment ritual count. Instead of answering puffy that "now just repeat everything I say" when the ritual stage is 0 and the ritual count is 2, say "Puffy shoots you a look worthy of a Great-Aunt." Does the player mean answering Puffy that: it is likely. Instead of answering Puffy that "nothing", say "You don't say anything to Puffy. Good show!" After answering Puffy that "potnia": If the ritual count is 5 and the ritual stage is 0: Say "You need to wait a moment for Puffy to give you the prompt."; Stop the action; If the ritual count is 6 and the ritual stage is 0: If the sneezing count is 3: Say "You get out the 'mighty' just fine, but a massive sneeze overcomes you just as you hit the 'Potnia' part -- a nasal explosion that wins plaudits and catcalls from everyone save Puffy, who's rather drenched in the results of your triumph. 'I suppose that's close enough,' he says, wringing out the hem of his chiton. 'Ask me about the ritual when you're ready for the next bit.'"; Now the ritual stage is 1; Now the ritual count is 0; Now frustration is 0; Now the player is sneeze-suppressed; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "[one of]'Mighty Potnia,' you say with confidence, only to be met with a chorus of bemusement. 'No, that's not quite it,' scolds Puffy. 'Insufficiently plosive, old man,' Machon Ephippus-Ephipus puts in. 'More nasal, more emphasis on the first syllable.'[or]Dashed if you can tell the difference, but your pronunciation is still not nasal or eruptive enough for Puffy.[stopping]"; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "This really isn't the time for that!". Instead of answering Puffy that "mighty potnia", try answering Puffy that "potnia". Does the player mean answering puffy that "Potnia": it is very likely. Does the player mean answering puffy that "mighty potnia": it is very likely. Understand the command "shout" as something new. Understand "shout [text] to/at [someone]" as shouting it to. Shouting it to is an action applying to one topic and one visible thing. Carry out shouting it to: Say "[Second noun] seems rather nonplussed by your outburst." Understand "yell mighty/-- potnia at/to/-- puffy/--" as fnording when the ritual count is greater than three and the ritual stage is 0. Understand "shout mighty/-- potnia to/at/-- puffy/--" as fnording when the ritual count is greater than three and the ritual stage is 0. Instead of fnording when the player is in the telesterion and the ritual count is 6 and the sneezing count is not 3, say "You try increasing the volume on your 'mighty Potnia,' but it doesn't seem to do the trick." Instead of fnording when the player is in the telesterion and the ritual count is 6 and the sneezing count is 3, try answering Puffy that "potnia". After answering someone that "blooey": If the noun is Puffy and the ritual count is 2 and the ritual stage is 0: Say "You need to wait a moment for Puffy to say it first."; Stop the action; If the noun is puffy and the ritual count is 3 and the ritual stage is 0: Say "Puffy nods at you, relieved by your ability to follow simple directions (there are benefits, pedagogically speaking, to having a Great-Aunt!)"; Now the ritual count is 4; Now frustration is 0; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "This really isn't the time for that!". [You might have noticed that sometimes the ritual count goes up automatically turn by turn to denote time passing, and sometimes it goes up in response to the player's successful actions. Not confusing at all!] Fnording is an action applying to nothing. Understand "blooey" as fnording. Instead of fnording while the player is in the telesterion, try answering Puffy that "blooey". After fnording, say "This really isn't the time for that!". Fjording is an action applying to nothing. Understand "potnia" or "mighty potnia" as fjording. Instead of fjording while the player is in the telesterion, try answering Puffy that "potnia". Instead of fjording, say "This really isn't the time for that!". [figuring out how to redirect a one-word command to be the second noun of a two-object action is hard, so I came up with these workarounds instead] Every turn while Puffy is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is not 10: If the ritual count is 0: Now Puffy is described; Otherwise: Now Puffy is undescribed. Every turn while the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 1 and the ritual count is not 0: If the player is disruptive and the ritual count is not 1: Say "Puffy looks at you, horrified. 'We need silence! Talk to me when you're ready to try again.'"; Now the ritual count is 0; If Machon is asleep and the player is not disruptive and the ritual count is not 1: Say "You're doing a very good job staying quiet, but the same cannot be said for Machon, whose snores rather reverberate through the still hall. 'Perhaps you could do something about him, and talk to me when you're ready to try again,' Puffy says."; Now the ritual count is 0; If the ritual count is 5: Say "You wait for a moment, sure that there must be something more interesting to come, but no, Puffy appears to be finished, and one of his assistants whisks the platter and basin away. 'It's a symbolic act,' he says defensively, 'means new life will come from old.' You nod, as though this follows -- at any rate, that's one more part of this thing-gummy finished, so you can check in with Puffy when you're ready for the next."; Now the ritual count is 0; Now the ritual stage is 2; Now the platter is nowhere; Now the basin is nowhere; If the ritual count is 4: Say "Slowly, Puffy drags the knife across the barley, cutting a few kernels off into a shallow basin, then crushes the pennyroyal and throws it in too."; Now the barley is in the basin; Now the pennyroyal is in the basin; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 3: Say "Now Puffy moves to the platter, and takes the pennyroyal and the ear of barley you found earlier."; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 2: Say "Puffy takes out a knife -- your knife! -- from his sleeve, and slowly tests its point on his finger."; Increment ritual count; If the ritual count is 1: Say "[one of]'This next bit might be hard for you,' Puffy says with concern. 'You just need to stay quiet while I prepare the kykeon.' You're about to ask what the blazes this kykeon is that he and Alky are always going on about, but as the fellow's a born pedant, he's already explaining: 'we make a special drink from the barley and pennyroyal you brought us, plus a few other special ingredients, then drink it at the end of the ceremony.'[or]Puffy heaves a sigh and motions for you to be quiet as he once again starts to prepare the kykeon.[stopping]"; Increment ritual count. [Parenthtically, you might be wondering why all of these long every turn rules go backwards in time, rather than forwards as might be more intuitive -- it's because I didn't know how "otherwise if" worked] Before jumping or asking or telling or questioning or saying yes or saying no or saying sorry or crying: Now the player is disruptive. Before telling about: Now the player is disruptive. Before asking about: Now the player is disruptive. Before questioning about: Now the player is disruptive. Before answering that: Now the player is disruptive. Instead of taking the barley while the player is in the Telesterion: Say "There comes a moment in every fellow's life when he asks himself, 'have I spent enough time carting around an ear of near-rotted barley for one night?' For you, the answer is an unequivocal yes." Instead of taking the knife while the player is in the Telesterion: Say "Puffy seems like he'd really rather hang on to that." Every turn while the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0: If the the joking count plus singing count plus the dancing count plus the ridiculous count are greater than 9: Say "Wave after wave of laughter convulses the crowd, and even Puffy exhales a sharp chortle or two. 'Oh, good show!' he says."; Now the ritual count is 0; Now the ritual stage is 3; Now the joking count is 0; Now the singing count is 0; Now the dancing count is 0; If the ritual count has been 2 for 5 turns: Say "[one of]Despite your best efforts, boredom has overtaken the crowd. 'Best give it a breather,' Puffy advises, 'come back when you've fine-tuned your act and your persona.'[or]Despite your best efforts, boredom has overtaken the crowd once again. 'Best give it a breather,' Puffy advises, 'come back when you've fine-tuned your act and your persona. And try to look the part!'[stopping]"; Now the ritual count is 0; If the ritual count is 1: Say "[one of]'All right, now we're getting somewhere,' Puffy says. 'Next we commemorate those who for a moment brought a smile to holy Demeter's face while she mourned her lost daughter, by invoking divine hilarity.' You think you've worked this out, and Puffy confirms it: 'Yes, try to make the chaps laugh. Seems in your wheelhouse, no?'[or]'Alright, let's have some more comedy,' Puffy says, his lowered expectations written across his face.[stopping]"; Increment ritual count. [My gosh, do you see that "if the ritual count has been 2 for 5 turns" bit? That's actually competent coding taking advantage of Inform's built-in capacities!] [Or so I hope] Understand "amuse crowd" as joking while the player is in the telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0. Before joking when the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0: If the joking count is less than 3: Increment joking count; Continue the action. Before dancing when the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0: If the dancing count is less than 3: Increment dancing count; Continue the action. Before singing when the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0: If the singing count is less than 3: Increment singing count; Continue the action. [Wait, do you really need "continue the action" in before rules??? I'm pretty sure you don't] Understand the command "juggle" as something new. Understand "juggle [things]" as juggling. Juggling is an action applying to one carried thing. A multiple action processing rule when the action name part of the current action is the juggling action: Let L be the multiple object list; If the number of entries in L is greater than 1: Change L to have 1 entry; Alter the multiple object list to L. Check juggling: If the player does not carry the noun, say "You're dubious that you could juggle that, but you're quite sure you couldn't do so without laying hands on it first." instead; If the player carries the noun, say "You don't know how to juggle, and you don't think you're likely to start with [the noun]." instead. [I was very proud of figuring out how to write an action that can take multiple objects, even though all it does is quickly throw away all those objects to give a canned "nope"] Instead of jumping when the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0, try dancing. The crowd reaction safeguard is a number that varies. The crowd reaction safeguard is 0. [Anytime you see me type the words "safeguard" or "workaround" or "failsafe" here, you can tell that I'm about to do something totally smart] After doing anything other than joking or singing or dancing or reciting poetry while the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 2 and the ritual count is not 0 and the crowd reaction safeguard is 0: Say "[one of]The fellows look at you, a bit gormless and certainly not amused.[or]The fellows look at you, a bit gormless and certainly not amused.[or]'Give us some singing!' someone calls from the crowd. Now there's an idea![or]You shuffle your feet a bit, and the crowd, mistaking that for dancing, gives you a smattering of applause.[at random]"; Now the crowd reaction safeguard is 1. Every turn when the crowd reaction safeguard is 1: Now the crowd reaction safeguard is 0. [Again, why did I need this? I really can't tell] Every turn while the ritual stage is 3 and the ritual count is 0: Say "'Last part,' says Puffy, putting a lot of cheek into a heavy exhalation (now you remember where the nickname came from!). 'You lot need to pass an hour in silent prayer and meditation while the kykeon brews.'"; Now the player is sleepy; Now the ritual count is 1. Praying is an action applying to nothing. Understand "pray" as praying. Understand "meditate" as praying. Instead of waiting while the ritual stage is 3 and the ritual count is 1 and the player is in the Telesterion, try praying. A carry out rule for praying: If the ritual stage is not 3 or the ritual count is not 1 or the player is not in the Telesterion: Say "You mumble a bit of praise under your breath, on the theory that it couldn't hurt."; Stop the action; If the player is wakeful and Machon is wakeful: Say "You mumble your way through an hour's worth of prayers[if the player is hiccuping and the player is sneezing] -- intermittent hiccups and sneezes mean much of your devotion is directed to Per-hic-sepho-choo, though hopefully the goddess won't mind too much[end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is not sneezing] -- intermittent hiccups mean much of your devotion is directed to Per-hic-sephone, though hopefully the goddess won't mind too much[end if][if the player is not hiccuping and the player is sneezing] -- intermittent sneezes mean much of your devotion is directed to Persepho-choo, though hopefully the goddesses won't mind too much[end if].[line break][line break]"; Say "Finally, well after you've started looking about for a water-clock to check whether the hour is up, Puffy's assistant returns, carefully tottling in a brim-ful oinochaio, or is it an oinochoai, or an oinocha-cha -- a jug, you decide, a brim-ful jug. 'The kykeon is ready,' Puffy declares, and gosh, this bird is good at bringing the portent. 'You are about to become full initiates into the mysteries -- so from now on you can't talk about not talking about what you can't talk about. Right?' You think you're supposed to nod, so you do[if the player is wearing the toothpick], while taking the opportunity to de-toothpick your eye[end if]. Meanwhile the assistant runs out to the banquet-hall to round up the rest of the crowd, making the telesterion rather a standing-room-only concern and throwing you, Machon, and Alky into a neighborly clump. [line break][line break]Puffy raises the jug to his lips, not without a bit of sloshing, and drinks quite the quaff. He makes a face, then hands it back to the assistant, who circles the room offering a chug to each personage in their turn. 'We stand together in Eleusis to celebrate the most sacred mysteries of life, which have been vouchsafed to us for obeisance and -- say, fellows,' Puffy breaks off, laying an unsteady hand against the nearest pillar, 'why aren't you standing still? This is no -- time for dancing --'. He sinks to the floor.[line break][line break]"; Say "You shoot a look at Machon -- maybe this is a gag they pull on all the new initiates, and that wheeze about dancing means there's about to be a musical number? There was this one supper club where you had to promise to sing in order to get in (and then once you were in and they'd heard you, promise to stop singing in order to stay). But no, this doesn't seem like a gag, as others are now reeling about the same way Puffy is. 'I thought the kykeon tasted off,' one of them slurs, and for a moment you wonder whether your standards with respect to barley-freshness might need to be recalibrated -- but there's hardly time to assess the impact of agricultural decay on human metabolism before the fellows who've already swallowed their share of the kykeon interrupt your cogitations by making the most frightful stir. [line break][line break]In a metamorphosis worthy of a poet, the crowd has suddenly become a mob, with scuffles breaking out left and right, chaps racing flat-out into pillars, and a few unlucky sods crawling back to the jug for seconds and thirds of the perhaps-too-potent kykeon. [if the torch is in the underworld]One gent produces a torch and begins to juggle it, then loses interest and lets it fall, fortunately away from anything flammable. [end if]Suddenly Puffy springs back up, lets out an uninhibited bellow, then sprints out of the room and clear out of the sanctuary, bringing most of the rest of the crowd along in his wake. In the confusion, you kick over the kykeon, in a closing-the-barn-door-after-it's-too-late sort of way, then follow so you don't miss too much of the excitement. "; Now the ritual stage is 98; Now the ritual count is 0; If the player wears the toothpick: Now the player carries the toothpick; Now the crowd of gourmands is nowhere; Now the audience is nowhere; Now the description of the couches is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]The couches are empty now that everyone's outside[otherwise]The couches bear mute witness to the pig's gustatory frolics[end if]."; Now the placeholder pal is in the portico; If the torch is in the Underworld: Now the torch is in the Telesterion; Now Alky is described; Now the harpist is nowhere; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Now Machon is in the portico; Stop the action; If the player is sleepy: Say "[one of]Your prayer starts out strong, [if the player is hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup and sneeze, [end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is not sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup, [end if][if the player is not hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional sneeze, [end if]but as you get to a particularly dull bit [one of]about Persephone's fruit-plate preferences[or]reciting the list of which birds give good omens[at random], your left eyelid starts to droop down -- for you, an infallible herald of an oncoming nap -- and you jerk awake in horror. If there's one thing your Great-Aunts have taught you about prayer vigils, it's that you can't sleep through them.[or]Your prayer starts out strong, [if the player is hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup and sneeze, [end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is not sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup, [end if][if the player is not hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional sneeze, [end if]but as you get to a particularly dull bit [one of]about Persephone's fruit-plate preferences[or]reciting the list of which birds give good omens[at random], despite all your good intentions once again your eye starts to droop. You've got to keep it open![stopping]"; Stop the action; If Machon is sleepy or Machon is asleep: Now Machon is asleep; Say "[one of]You're getting through your prayers, [if the player is hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup and sneeze, [end if][if the player is hiccuping and the player is not sneezing]despite the occasional hiccup, [end if][if the player is not hiccuping and the player is sneezing]despite the occasional sneeze, [end if]but you're interrupted by a wheeze, and not the diverting kind -- searching for the source, you see that Machon Ephippus-Ephipus['] slouch has turned into more of a fully-horizontal jobby. Puffy was quite specific about all of you keeping the vigil, so you resolve to do your part to get him through -- it's the brotherly thing to do![or]Ephippus-Ephipus is nodding off again, poor lamb, and emits a dry, repetitive snore. You can't very well keep prodding him awake while you're in the middle of your meditations, though -- you might need some help with this.[stopping]"; Stop the action. Every turn when the player can see Alky and the player is in the Telesterion: Now Alky's target is wakeful; If Alky is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 3: Say "Alky is [if Alky's target is the doppleganger]sitting next to you, offering a quick elbow to the ribs or an acid witticism whenever you're in danger of nodding off[end if][if Alky's target is Machon]looming over poor Machon, prodding him when he's in danger of slipping into Hypnos['] embrace[end if]." Every turn while the doppleganger is wakeful: Now the player is wakeful. [Oi, the doppleganger! I forget the exact problem it was meant to solve -- I think there was some issue where having the player be set as Alky's target for poking-awake wasn't working, so instead of figuring out the problem and fixing it, I just set the target to a placeholder and then set conditions from the doppleganger like this] Every turn while Alky is in the Telesterion and Machon is not Alky's target and Machon does not have the cup: Now Machon is sleepy. Instead of giving something to Machon while Machon is asleep, say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him." The Machon cup-buffer is a number that varies. The Machon cup-buffer is 0. [This is going to be another good one, I can tell] Instead of giving the cup to Machon: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; If the cup is empty, say "'You've forgotten to fill it with anything,' Machon says, politely refusing the cup."; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine: Say "Machon gratefully takes the cup, drains it to the dregs, and promptly enters a state of deep repose."; Now Machon is sleepy; Now Machon is asleep; Now the cup is in the Telesterion; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water: Say "Machon takes an experimental swig, then perks up. 'Say, that really refreshes. Cheers!' He keeps the cup so he can take the occasional nip."; Now Machon is wakeful; Now Machon carries the cup. Every turn while Machon has the cup: If Machon has had the cup for ten turns: Now the cup is empty; Now the cup is in the Telesterion; Now Machon is sleepy; If the player is in the Telesterion: Say "Machon finishes drinking the cup, and places it on a table in case you want it back. He already looks a little less alert."; Otherwise: Now the Machon cup-buffer is 1. Every turn while the Machon cup-buffer is 1 and the player is in the Telesterion: Now the Machon cup-buffer is 0. [...OK I checked and this apparently changes how the cup is described -- like, it mentions that Machon put it down -- but it shouldn't be reset each turn so this is a bug] Understand "ask [person] for [text]" as asking it about. Instead of asking Alky about "help": Say "'If you need help with something, just ask about it, old thing,' Alky replies." Instead of asking Alky to try waking Machon, try questioning Alky about Machon. Instead of asking Alky about "vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation/meditating": If the ritual stage is 3 and Alky is not in the Telesterion: Say "'That bit is rather a bore. Want some company in your meditations?' Alky asks. 'I suppose I could be bothered.' He saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Stop the action; If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'Rather a bore, but we'll get through it,' Alky says, squeezing your arm."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh yes, I believe that's coming up. Puffy will fill you in,' Alky says." Instead of asking Alky about "the vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation": If the ritual stage is 3 and Alky is not in the Telesterion: Say "'That bit is rather a bore. Want some company in your meditations?' Alky asks. 'I suppose I could be bothered.' He saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Stop the action; If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'Rather a bore, but we'll get through it,' Alky says, squeezing your arm."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh yes, I believe that's coming up. Puffy will fill you in,' Alky says." [... I've mentioned that I didn't know about -- yet, right?] Instead of asking Alky about "sleep/sleepiness/fatigue/sleeping": If the ritual stage is 3 and Alky is not in the Telesterion: Say "'That bit is rather a bore. Want some company in your meditations?' Alky asks. 'I suppose I could be bothered.' He saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Stop the action; If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'Rather a bore, but we'll get through it,' Alky says, squeezing your arm."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted." Instead of asking Alky about "being sleepy/tired": If the ritual stage is 3 and Alky is not in the Telesterion: Say "'That bit is rather a bore. Want some company in your meditations?' Alky asks. 'I suppose I could be bothered.' He saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Stop the action; If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'Rather a bore, but we'll get through it,' Alky says, squeezing your arm."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted." Instead of asking Alky about "staying awake/up": If the ritual stage is 3 and Alky is not in the Telesterion: Say "'That bit is rather a bore. Want some company in your meditations?' Alky asks. 'I suppose I could be bothered.' He saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Stop the action; If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'Rather a bore, but we'll get through it,' Alky says, squeezing your arm."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You get a blank look of the sort with which you're well acquainted." Instead of questioning Alky about Machon: If Alky is in the Telesterion: Say "'He could use some help staying awake, couldn't he?' Alky says, taking up a position near his couch[if Machon is asleep] and giving him a friendly prod back to awareness[end if]."; Now Alky's target is Machon; Now the player is sleepy; Now the doppleganger is sleepy; Now Machon is awake; now the player is disruptive; If Alky is not in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is not 3: say "'A boon companion,' is Alky's assessment, 'albeit one who can't hold more liquor than a thimble.'"; now the player is disruptive; If Alky is not in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 3: Say "'He could use some help staying awake, couldn't he? I suppose I could be bothered.' Alky saunters out of the banquet hall, shooting you a come-hither look."; Now Alky's target is Machon; Now Alky is in the Telesterion; Now Machon is awake; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Alky about Puffy: Say "'Puffy is as puffy does,' Alky says, that sibylline minx."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of sleeping: If the player is in the bedroom: Say "What with all the banging on the door, not to mention your imminent arrest, this doesn't seem like the ideal time to grab a spot of shut-eye."; Stop the action; If the player is in the Telesterion and the ritual stage is 3 and the ritual count is 1: Say "The whole point of a vigil, so far as you understand it, is not to sleep."; Stop the action; If the player is sleepy: Say "Now that you think of it, you are a bit drowsy, but nodding off during your initiation probably wouldn't display the proper dose of vim-and-vigor."; Stop the action; If the player is wakeful: Say "You couldn't doze if you tried."; Stop the action. Instead of waking Machon: If Machon is asleep: Say "You rouse Machon with a gentle shake. He smiles his thanks, then emits a small yawn."; Now Machon is awake; Stop the action; If Machon is awake: Say "'Come on, old man,' Machon protests, stifling a yawn. 'I'm awake!'"; Stop the action. Understand "prod [someone]" and "wake [someone]" and "poke [someone]" and "shake [someone]" and "rouse [someone]" as waking. Instead of pushing Machon when Machon is asleep, try waking Machon. Instead of waking someone when the noun is awake, say "You've always found that keeping one's hands to oneself is sound policy." Understand "prod [something]" and "poke [something]" and "shake [something]" as touching. Before doing anything other than waking or pushing or lighting or burning to Machon: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. The doppleganger is a person. It is nowhere. It is sleepy. Alky's target is a person that varies. Alky's target is initially the doppleganger. Esmond Puffy Kerykes is a man. The printed name of Esmond Puffy Kerykes is "Puffy". "Esmond Kerykes -- Puffy to his friends -- lounges about." He is in the Telesterion. The description is "[if puffy is in the telesterion]You once asked Alky how Puffy got his nickname. 'Puffy is as puffy does,' Alky said, which you thought was wonderfully smart though, naturally, sufficiently over your head that you've still not the faintest idea. At any rate, this specimen of the Kerykes clan is if anything rather gaunt -- looking at the bony shoulder poking out from under his chiton just makes you sad.[end if][if puffy is asleep]Puffy, poor lamb, is nestled against the pillar like it's the softest sleeping-couch he's found. [end if][if puffy is carrying the honeycomb]He has a rather banged-up honeycomb stuck to his lapel.[end if]". He is unknown. He is undescribed. Understand "shoulder" as Puffy. Instead of asking Puffy about "next/-- bit/ritual/rituals/initiation/ceremony/initiations/ceremonies/step/hoop/hoops": If ritual count is 0: Say "[one of]'Let's get cracking,' Puffy says, rubbing his hands together.[or]'Yes, let's get on with it,' says Puffy, sniffing in what's either irritation or a coming head-cold. 'Where was I...'[stopping]"; Now ritual count is 1; Now the joking count is 0; Now the dancing count is 0; Now the singing count is 0; Otherwise: Say "'The ritual?' Puffy hisses between his teeth, 'you mean this ritual? This one we're doing right now?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "the/next ritual/initiation/ceremony/rituals/initiations/ceremonies/step/bit": If ritual count is 0: Say "[one of]'Let's get cracking,' Puffy says, rubbing his hands together.[or]'Yes, let's get on with it,' says Puffy, sniffing in what's either irritation or a coming head-cold. 'Where was I...'[stopping]"; Now ritual count is 1; Now the joking count is 0; Now the dancing count is 0; Now the singing count is 0; Otherwise: Say "'The ritual?' Puffy hisses between his teeth, 'you mean this ritual? This one we're doing right now?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "Demeter/daughter/Persephone/Proserpine": Say "'After your initiation,' Puffy says, making a sort of pass with his hands, 'you will learn the mysteries of the Goddess."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about Puffy: say "'I'm very well, thank you,' Puffy says flatly. 'These initiations are the most fun I have all year.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "himself": Say "'I'm very well, thank you,' Puffy says flatly. 'These initiations are the most fun I have all year.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "nickname/name": Say "'I'm sure I wouldn't know why they call me that,' Puffy says, his eyes darkening. 'Why don't you ask your friend Alky?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about Alky: say "'He's Pericles['] ward, what a coup to have him join, they said,' Puffy says, kneading his brow. 'He's more like Zeus's daughter, from the headache he gives me.'[if Alky is in the Telesterion][line break]Alky perks up at hearing his name mentioned and blows Puffy a kiss.[end if]"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "Pericles": Say "As you recall, this Pericles chap was rather a bore -- there was some funeral oration that banged on and on and on -- so you think better of giving Puffy the opportunity to be even more dull than usual.". Instead of questioning Puffy about Machon: say "'I've just met him, but he seems very devoted to the mysteries,' Puffy allows. 'Especially the edible components.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the player: say "'Er... you seem pleasant enough?' Puffy ventures. You give him an enthusiastic smile -- it's so rare to meet someone who just understands you straight off!"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the spilled kykeon: say "'We mix the pennyroyal, the barley, and a few other ingredients to make the kykeon,' Puffy explains, patient. 'Then after the initiation is done, we drink it!' There's an atypical fervor in his eyes as he says this last bit."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking someone about "the/-- ingredients", try questioning the noun about the spilled kykeon. Instead of questioning Puffy about the barley: say "'We mix the pennyroyal, the barley, and a few other ingredients to make the kykeon,' Puffy explains, patient. 'Then after the initiation is done, we drink it!' There's an atypical fervor in his eyes as he says this last bit."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the pennyroyal: say "'We mix the pennyroyal, the barley, and a few other ingredients to make the kykeon,' Puffy explains, patient. 'Then after the initiation is done, we drink it!' There's an atypical fervor in his eyes as he says this last bit."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the knife: say "You start to ask for your knife back, but it might be misconstrued as a rather tactless request, seeing how Puffy's initiating you into the fathomless mysteries that turn men into gods. Maybe you'll just drop a hint later on.". Instead of questioning Puffy about the krater of the east: say "'There's one krater for libations to the east, and another for libations to the west,' Puffy says. 'The gods aren't exactly sticklers for efficiency.'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the banquet food: say "'Yes, we take pride in our pre-ceremony repast,' Puffy says. 'Your cousin has already enjoyed it heartily!'"; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the urns of wine: say "'The gifts of Dionysus bring our minds close to those of the gods,' Puffy intones, and you nod, though you can't say you've quite thought of it like that before."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the Hermes sandals: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. [....all of this because tables seemed too tough to figure out. Oi!] Instead of questioning Puffy about the set of cothurni: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the feather boa: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the gold chain: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the silly floppy tam: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the crown of laurels: say "'An interesting sartorial choice,' Puffy says, lips pursed."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the largish chunk of amphora: Say "'Oh. You kept that?' Puffy seems taken aback."; now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "sneeze/sneezing/sneezes": say "'A sneeze is a portent of divine favor, you know,' Puffy says. 'Still rather disruptive, though!'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "hiccup/hiccups/hiccuping": say "'Have you tried holding your breath and swallowing?' Puffy asks, solicitous."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "comedy/jokes/joke/joking/hilarity/laugh/laughs/laughing/laughter/entertain/entertainment/humor": say "'It's a simple matter of amusement,' Puffy says, looking about as unamused as a Great-Aunt."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "potnia": say "'It's a bit of a tricky word,' Puffy allows. 'It has to come out rather suddenly, like you're spitting. But don't spit!' he says reprovingly."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "mighty potnia": say "'It's a bit of a tricky word,' Puffy allows. 'It has to come out rather suddenly, like you're spitting. But don't spit!' he says reprovingly."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "how to say potnia": say "'It's a bit of a tricky word,' Puffy allows. 'It has to come out rather suddenly, like you're spitting. But don't spit!' he says reprovingly."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the Telesterion: Say "'Been in the family for years,' Puffy says with a negligent gesture. 'We've made one or two little additions, of course.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "blooey": say "Puffy seems to about have had his fill of 'blooey.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "saying blooey": say "Puffy seems to about have had his fill of 'blooey.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "the vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation": say "'Honestly, any prayers are fine, pick whatever god you like,' Puffy confides in you and gives a little laugh. 'Just need to run out the clock while the kykeon brews.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation": say "'Honestly, any prayers are fine, pick whatever god you like,' Puffy confides in you and gives a little laugh. 'Just need to run out the clock while the kykeon brews.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Puffy about the harpist: Say "'I hope you're enjoying the music,' Puffy says. He shoots a dirty look at the grating, then leads towards you and whispers: 'that harpist's rates are highway robbery, but he's mother's favorite so we're stuck with him.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Puffy about "music": Say "'I hope you're enjoying the music,' Puffy says. He shoots a dirty look at the grating, then leads towards you and whispers: 'that harpist's rates are highway robbery, but he's mother's favorite so we're stuck with him.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of giving the cup to Puffy: Say "Puffy shakes his head. 'Thank you, but the Mysteries require complete abstinence of me until the initiation is complete.' You suppress a shudder -- the fellow is a wet noodle, but perhaps you should hurry things up just the same." Instead of asking Puffy about "sleep/sleeping/sleepiness/fatigue", say "'Oh, I always take a nap right before the ceremony,' Puffy confides sympathetically. 'Only way to do it.'" Instead of asking Puffy about "being sleepy/tired", say "'Oh, I always take a nap right before the ceremony,' Puffy confides sympathetically. 'Only way to do it.'" Instead of asking Puffy about "staying awake/up", say "'Oh, I always take a nap right before the ceremony,' Puffy confides sympathetically. 'Only way to do it.'" Instead of asking Puffy about "act/performance", say "'I don't know, do the kinds of things the comedians do on stage,' Puffy shrugs at you (there's that shoulder again). You don't get the sense he actually goes to many comedies." Instead of asking Puffy about "persona/costume", say "'Try to look the part,' Puffy says. 'Perhaps a silly hat?'" [I guess I didn't bother rewriting these to make the player disruptive since presumably the player would only ask about this stuff after solving the sneezing puzzle?] Machon is a man. "[if Machon is awake and Machon is in the Telesterion][one of]Blimey! That bloke over there is your cousin, Machon Ephippus-Ephipus. Who knew he was on the to-be-initiated list too?[or]Your cousin Machon Ephippus-Ephippus is seated on a couch, doing his best to stay upright.[stopping][end if][if Machon is asleep]Good old Machon Ephippus-Ephipus slouches on a couch, having temporarily lost his struggle to stay upright.[end if][if Machon is in the Portico]Machon is here, looking no different now that he's preliminarily initiated into the mysteries of Eleusis.[end if]". He is in the Telesterion. The description is "Machon is your cousin, with one or two additional removes you've never been able to keep straight. He's something of a gourmand, with a physique to match." He is unknown. Understand "ephippus/ephipus/cousin/cuz/coz" as Machon. Instead of questioning Machon about Puffy: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Seems like a nice enough bloke,' Machon yawns. 'When I first got here he kept pestering me to do one thing or another, but after I got sleepy he told me not to worry, he'd have you take care of it all.' He smiles at you. 'Thanks coz!'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "nap": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; If Machon is sleepy: Say "'Oh, now that's a bright idea!' Machon says, and promptly begins snoozing."; Now Machon is asleep; Otherwise: Say "'Funny, I don't feel like a nap now,' Machon says with a philosophic air."; Now the player is disruptive. [...you know, I had low expectations going back into this code, but even still, I kind of can't believe that I was manually pasting in the "if Machon is asleep" condition to every single dialogue rule. How could I have possibly thought this was how things were supposed to work???] Instead of questioning Machon about Alky: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "[if Alky is in the telesterion]'Oh, hullo,' Machon says as you point out Alky and introduce them.[otherwise]'Sounds like one of your fancy friends,' Machon says."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "himself": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh, can't complain, can't complain,' Machon says, patting his stomach with a self-satisfied smile."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about Machon: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh, can't complain, can't complain,' Machon says, patting his stomach with a self-satisfied smile."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the player: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'You're my second-favorite third-cousin,' he says, beaming. 'Or wait, maybe it's the other way [']round.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the spilled kykeon: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "[if the kykeon is nowhere]'I heard his nibs here muttering about that,' Machon says, jerking his chin towards Puffy, 'but search me what it is.'[otherwise]'I might just stick to the wine,' Machon says, not without regret.[end if]"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the krater of the east: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Sounds important,' Machon says, but you can tell he's only being polite."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the barley: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Sounds important,' Machon says, but you can tell he's only being polite."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the pennyroyal: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Sounds important,' Machon says, but you can tell he's only being polite."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the knife: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Sounds important,' Machon says, but you can tell he's only being polite."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "comestibles/snack", try questioning Machon about the banquet food. Instead of questioning Machon about the banquet food: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Yes, a repast to remember,' Machon says, suppressing a belch. 'Though I've just had a little nibble as of yet -- don't want to ruin my appetite!"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "drink/drinks/drinking/alcohol/imbibable/imbibables", try questioning Machon about the urns of wine. Does the player mean questioning Machon about the urns of wine: it is very likely. Instead of questioning Machon about the urns of wine: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh, I never touch the stuff,' says Machon. 'Or at least, I never remember if I have.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the set of cothurni: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Hmm. Shoes,' says Machon, clearly uninterested."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the Hermes sandals: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Hmm. Shoes,' says Machon, clearly uninterested."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the feather boa: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oooh, now that's got some style!' Machon says approvingly."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the gold chain: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon casts a skeptical eye on the gold chain. 'Hardly seems long enough for a belt, no?' You don't have the heard to disagree."; Now the player is disruptive. [Oops, a typo!] Instead of questioning Machon about the silly floppy tam: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You can tell that Machon is suppressing a jealous twinge as he contemplates your spiffing hat."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the crown of laurels: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'What'd you win, coz?' Machon asks; embarrassed, you mumble and change the subject."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "sneeze/sneezes/sneezing": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'I'm against sneezing on principle,' says Machon. 'It's just undignified.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "hiccups/hiccuping/hiccup": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'I get those sometimes too,' Machon admits to you. 'Everyone always has some silly idea about how to get rid of them, but nothing ever works for me!' You forebear from pointing out that he's not hiccuping now."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "the/-- clouds/comedy/joke/jokes/joking/hilarity/laugh/laughs/laughing/laughter/entertain/entertainment/humor": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "'Oh, I saw The Clouds last year, you know,' Machon says. You're impressed -- that was a hot ticket!"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "potnia": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon blinks. 'Who was that you said?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "mighty potnia": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon blinks. 'Who was that you said?'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the telesterion: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon looks around. 'Seems nice enough, but a little drafty.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of questioning Machon about the harpist: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon shakes his head. 'That music's a little too modern for me -- too many Phrygian modes!' You nod along but you're clearly out of your depth."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "music": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon shakes his head. 'That music's a little too modern for me -- too many Phrygian modes!' You nod along but you're clearly out of your depth."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "blooey": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon's grin threatens to split his head: 'isn't that just a lovely word? I heard my nephew say it a few weeks ago, and I thought, that's my new favorite word.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "saying blooey": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon's grin threatens to split his head: 'isn't that just a lovely word? I heard my nephew say it a few weeks ago, and I thought, that's my new favorite word.'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "the vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'This vigil is more of an opt-in sort of job, no?' Machon looks over at Puffy, who shakes his head. 'Ah. Well,' says Machon, [if Machon is sleepy]stifling a yawn, [end if]'I'll do my best!'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "vigil/prayer/prayers/praying/meditation": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'This vigil is more of an opt-in sort of job, no?' Machon looks over at Puffy, who shakes his head. 'Ah. Well,' says Machon, [if Machon is sleepy]stifling a yawn, [end if]'I'll do my best!'"; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "sleep/sleepiness/fatigue/sleeping": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "[if Machon is sleepy]'I am a bit tired, I s'pose,' Machon says, stifling a yawn. 'Perhaps I had a nip too much wine earlier, but still, I'll do my best![otherwise]'Well, I never say no to a nap, but I'm feeling all right now,' Machon says."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "being sleepy/tired": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "[if Machon is sleepy]'I am a bit tired, I s'pose,' Machon says, stifling a yawn. 'Perhaps I had a nip too much wine earlier, but still, I'll do my best![otherwise]'Well, I never say no to a nap, but I'm feeling all right now,' Machon says."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "staying up/awake": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "[if Machon is sleepy]'I am a bit tired, I s'pose,' Machon says, stifling a yawn. 'Perhaps I had a nip too much wine earlier, but still, I'll do my best!'[otherwise]'Well, I never say no to a nap, but I'm feeling all right now,' Machon says."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "mysteries/miseries/ritual/eleusinian/ceremony/ceremonies/initiation": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'It all seems a jolly lark so far!' Machon says, with puppyish enthusiasm."; Now the Machon is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "the/eleusinian mysteries": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'It all seems a jolly lark so far!' Machon says, with puppyish enthusiasm."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of asking Machon about "the eleusinian mysteries": If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: say "'It all seems a jolly lark so far!' Machon says, with puppyish enthusiasm."; Now the player is disruptive. Instead of giving the toothpick to Machon: If Machon is asleep: Say "Machon, emitting the occasional snore, is insensible to the world about him."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon looks dubiously at the toothpick. [if the ritual stage is 3 and the ritual count is not 0]'That doesn't seem especially pleasant,' he squeaks. 'I'll stay awake this time, I promise!'[otherwise]'Oh, thanks, but I never touch the things,' he says, waving it away. 'All that digging about ruins the digestion.'" Instead of asking Machon to try wearing the toothpick, try giving the toothpick to Machon. Instead of asking Machon to try taking the toothpick, try giving the toothpick to Machon. A container called Machon's eyes are part of Machon. They are scenery. They are plural-named. The description is "Machon's eyes are a bit bloodshot but otherwise unremarkable.[if Machon is sleepy] Despite all his yawning, his eyes don't seem especially fluttery.[end if]". Instead of inserting the toothpick into Machon's eyes: If Machon is asleep: Say "That would be cruel in the best of circs, but especially now, when he's sleeping"; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "Machon looks dubiously at the toothpick. 'That doesn't seem especially pleasant,' he squeaks. 'I'll stay awake this time, I promise!'" Instead of inserting something into Machon's eyes, say "That really wouldn't be very cousinly of you." Understand "Machon's eye" as Machon's eyes. Instead of asking Machon to try doing something, say "Your cousin's never been especially good at doing what others ask, and this probably isn't the evening that changes.[if Machon is asleep] Besides, he's sleeping now, which adds an extra element of challenge.[end if]". Instead of asking someone about "dance/dancing/dances", say "You heard a bon mot about this: asking about dancing is like architecting about -- hang on, how did it go?" Instead of pouring something into Machon, say "You're quite sure he wouldn't feel so cousinly towards you if you tried that!" Instead of putting something on Machon, say "You're quite sure he wouldn't feel so cousinly towards you if you tried that!" Instead of throwing something at Machon, say "You're quite sure he wouldn't feel so cousinly towards you if you tried that!" Instead of throwing something over Machon, say "You're quite sure he wouldn't feel so cousinly towards you if you tried that!" The Temple of Eleusis is a region. The Closet, the Banquet Hall, the Peristyle, and the Telesterion are in the Temple of Eleusis. The pillars are a backdrop. They are in the Temple of Eleusis. The description is "They say if you've seen one pillar, you've seen them all, and by the evidence here you agree (though you do have just a touch of nearsightedness, so possibly there's some excitement going on somewhere in all those ceiling-adjacent blurs)." Understand "pillar" as the pillars while the player is in the Temple of Eleusis. Understand "porch" as the pillars when the player is in the peristyle. The eleusinian ceiling is a backdrop. It is in the Temple of Eleusis. The description is "You lift your eyes heavenward, thinking that's the sort of thing one does while at a temple. The marble ceiling is nice enough, [if the player is in the peristyle]and in the center of the courtyard you can see a lovely bit of the night sky, [end if]but you quickly grow bored." Understand "roof" as the eleusinian ceiling while the player is in the Temple of Eleusis. [Hey, having a backdrop description varying with specific location is actually a cool trick! I'd forgotten about that] Does the player mean filling a fluid container (called the foo) with the foo: it is very unlikely. Chapter 3 - Oh No Departing is a scene. Departing begins when Machon is in the Portico. Departing ends when Calming the Horse has ended and Getting Puffy Down has ended and Repairing the Chariot has ended. [Chapter 3 has one mega-scene, and then three sub-scenes corresponding to each of the puzzles. Since the puzzles all have multiple solutions, the idea was scenes would be more efficient because they could just trigger off state changes rather than on a rule-by-rule basis - I'm not sure whether that wound up being easier, though] When Departing begins: Say "Great-Aunt Agnes says that things always go wrong when you're around, and you have to allow there's perhaps a smidgen of truth in that -- though now that you think of it, you're always around when you're around -- or to put it another way, you're never around when you're not around -- so you can't say as you have an adequate baseline from which to measure.[line break][line break]At any rate, things are certainly going wrong now. The mob is milling about, somewhere a horse gives a frightened whinny, and who knows where Puffy's wound up.[line break][line break]Oh, hang on, there he is![line break][line break]He's on the roof.[line break][line break]"; Now Hippy is known; Now the pig is known; Now the bee hive is known; Now the chariot is known; Now the wheel is known; Now the rein ring is known; Now the penultimate herm is known; Now the final herm is known; Now Puffy is in the Roof; If Machon carries the cup: Now the cup is in the Telesterion; Now Alky is in the Portico; Now the spilled kykeon is in the telesterion; Say "'Seems to me as though things are wrapping up here,' sniffs Alky as he comes over to you and Machon. 'Time to head back to Athens for the after party, I think. Oh don't worry,' he says, to your questioning look, 'you've been properly initiated and all. Or at least that's what we'll tell Puffy once he's better. Though Hippy rather panicked and smashed up my chariot,' Alky says, throwing a judgmental glance westward, 'so you'll need to see to my horse and vehicle before we can go. And I suppose you should see to Puffy, as well.' [line break][line break]You're not sure why you've been dragooned into taking care of all of this, but then you see how fetching Alky looks as he leans suavely against a pillar, puckishly tossing his curls, and you resign yourself to playing the dogsbody once again."; Now the player is in the portico. The spilled kykeon is a fluid container. It is everfull. It is nowhere. It is scenery. The description is "If you were to imagine a drink of minty, fermented barley, then imagined that it was ten times worse than the way you first imagined it, you'd be approaching an idea of the foul liquid spilling out of this jug." Instead of smelling or eating or taking or drinking the spilled kykeon, say "Oh good heavens no." Understand "jug/barley/mint/minty/liquid" as the spilled kykeon while the player is in the telesterion and departing is happening. Understand "pool of/-- spilled/-- kykeon/--" as the spilled kykeon. Instead of inserting the spilled kykeon into something, say "Oh good heavens no." Instead of inserting something into the spilled kykeon, say "Oh good heavens no." Instead of filling something with the spilled kykeon, say "Oh good heavens no." Instead of pouring something into the spilled kykeon, say "That would only spread it out more." Instead of pouring the spilled kykeon into something, say "Oh good heavens no." Understand "clean [spilled kykeon]" as washing in. Instead of washing in the spilled kykeon, say "This evening hasn't turned out to be quite the lark you'd hoped it'd be, and one would have to admit that you've kept your chin up and rolled with the punches throughout, but one has to draw the line somewhere, and mopping up a gone-off sacred beverage is where you're drawing that line." When Departing ends: Say "You wave Alky over now that horse, vehicle, and man are all accounted for and more or less intact, not without a bit of wear and tear around the margins. 'Nice spot of business,' he says, inclining his head at your accomplishments. 'The archons and magistrates might come on rather peevish about the herms once they're informed, but since the damage happened within sanctuary grounds I'm sure Puffy can cool them down. In any event, time to head to the metrop!' In fact the mob here appears to be breaking up, with about an even division between those staggering into the temple and calling uncle on the evening, and those hopping into their chariots to zip back to Athens for the after party (you note that Machon, despite his earlier struggle with somnabulance, is of the latter group).[line break][line break]You help Alky get Puffy wedged into the chariot, then join him as he snaps the reins and Hippy takes off onto the Sacred Way at an admirable, though perhaps not completely safety-conscious, pace."; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Now Alky is in the chariot; Now Puffy is in the chariot; Now the chariot is in the Sacred Way; Now Machon is undescribed; Now Alky is undescribed; Now Puffy is undescribed; Now the player is in the chariot. Calming the Horse is a scene. Calming the Horse begins when Departing begins. Calming the Horse ends when Hippy is calm. When Calming the Horse ends: Say "Finally, Hippy calms down, looking like Hercules must have done when the divine madness had passed and he realized that he'd rather stepped in it. She gives a tuneful nicker, either to thank you for everything you've done or just because she's a musical soul.[line break]"; If Hippy is calm and Hippy is not part of the chariot and the chariot is in the Yard: Now Hippy is part of the chariot; Now the Penultimate Herm is broken; Now Hippy is undescribed; Say "[line break]With Hippy calm and the chariot restored, you hitch the one to the other. It's not the world's simplest process (you think you might be trying to do it the wrong way round), and somehow in the confusion Hippy gives a kick that delivers a painful-looking blow to the most vulnerable spot of the nearby herm. You finish the job and nervously step clear -- lots of bad luck today!" Instead of singing while Getting Puffy Down is happening and the player is in the yard, say "[if Hippy is calm]You start to belt out a song, but are confused when your solo becomes a duet -- Hippy is whinnying along, and who's to say who's getting closer to the tune? Alky and Machon don't seem to have noticed this impressive performance, for good or ill.[end if][if hippy is frightened]Curiously enough, as you begin to sing, Hippy nervously whinnies along for a moment or two, before the noise spooks her and sends her cantering round the yard again.[end if]". Getting Puffy Down is a scene. Getting Puffy Down begins when Departing begins. Getting Puffy Down ends when Puffy is in the Portico. When Getting Puffy Down ends: Say "It's something of a task to disentangle yourself and Puffy, and sort out which limbs belong to whom -- including an awkward moment where it seems as though the thing might not come off and one might need to discuss non-custodial visitation rights vis a vis an ambiguous elbow. At least the fall seems to have knocked some sense into Puffy, as he looks like he's back to his old, lovable, long-suffering self, albeit somewhat the worse for wear. Besides the dirt smeared on his face like greasepaint and the twigs sprouting from his hair, he also has a bit of honeycomb stuck to his chiton (he must have had a run-in with bees on his way to the roof). [line break][line break]'Thanks awfully, old chap,' he croaks at you, then swallows heavily. 'I suppose that wasn't the best batch of kykeon I've brewed, but it can't be helped.' Alky and Machon, acting something like a Greek chorus, loudly agree with the sentiment, which seems to reassure him. 'I think I need a bit of a lie-down,' this somewhat-rattled Puffy says, 'good night.' He slumps down, landing on what you have to admit is the portico's comfiest-looking pillar.[line break][line break]As you dust yourself off and stand, you notice that Puffy seems to have bounced off the herm on his way down, and as a result the statue's unmentionable has been knocked clean off."; Now Puffy is asleep; Now the Final Herm is Broken; Now Puffy carries the honeycomb; If (Calming the Horse has not ended or Repairing the Chariot has not ended) and the player is not in the portico: Now the player is in the portico. Understand "pillar" as puffy while puffy is in the portico. Before doing anything other than examining to Puffy while puffy is asleep and Puffy is not in the chariot: Say "Puffy has more than earned some peaceful repose."; Stop the action. Before giving something to Puffy while puffy is asleep and Puffy is not in the chariot: Say "Puffy has more than earned some peaceful repose."; Stop the action. The honeycomb is an object. It is nowhere. The description is "This chunk of honeycomb has suffered more than its share of bludgeoning, and there are still a few bees buzzing desultorily about, but it remains sticky and delicious." Instead of smelling the honeycomb, say "You take a judicious sniff of the honeycomb, but quickly reverse course once you notice that your inhalation is sucking a distressed bee into your second-favorite nostril." Instead of eating the honeycomb, say "You bring the honeycomb near your mouth for a nibble, but the upset buzzing of the bees still inside it puts you off." Instead of smoking the honeycomb with the torch, say "These poor bees have suffered enough." Understand "honey/comb" as the honeycomb. Understand "bee/bees" as the honeycomb when the player carries the honeycomb and the player is not in the side of the temple. It is unknown. Instead of giving the honeycomb to a man, say "[Second noun] might enjoy the honeycomb, but then, you might enjoy it too." Instead of giving the honeycomb to an animal, say "There are still rather a lot of bees crawling around the honeycomb, and while you're willing the brave the dangers, inflicting them on an unsuspecting animal doesn't seem neighborly." Before giving the cake to someone: If the person is an animal, continue the action; Say "There's a near-limitless amount of the stuff baked up and available, so you trust that [Second noun] could get some if so desired." instead. Instead of taking the honeycomb when Puffy carries the honeycomb: Say "You delicately remove the honeycomb from Puffy's chest -- he's still dirty, bedraggled, and stickier-fingered than your cousin Pamphilos who nobody invites around any more, but at least you've done something."; Now the player carries the honeycomb. Instead of squeezing the honeycomb, say "You think you could get a good dollop of honey this way, but unless you directed it somewhere you'd just have sticky hands." Instead of putting the honeycomb on something, say "That would just make a sticky mess." Repairing the Chariot is a scene. Repairing the Chariot begins when Departing begins. Repairing the Chariot ends when the chariot is unbroken. When Repairing the Chariot ends: Say "The impression Alky would make rolling up in the chariot as reconstituted is maybe not precisely as good as that made by the first edition, but as someone whose only previous experience of vehicle maintenance was giving sugar-lumps to your Great-Uncle's oxen, you think you've gone rather above and beyond! After doing one final check to ensure it's up to snuff in both the rolling and the turning departments, you push the chariot out of the workshop -- careful not to ding the doorway as you exit! -- and into the yard. [line break][line break]It takes rather more grunting, sweating, and heaving than becomes a chap of your breeding, but eventually the eventuality eventuates and you get it where you want it. As you survey your handiwork with pride, you notice that your manhandling has dislodged a horsey treat from some nether crevice of the chariot.[line break]"; Now the chariot is in the Yard; Now the horsey treat is in the Yard; If Hippy is calm and Hippy is not part of the chariot and the chariot is in the Yard: Now Hippy is part of the chariot; Now Hippy is undescribed; Now the Penultimate Herm is broken; Say "[line break]With Hippy calm and the chariot restored, you hitch the one to the other. It's not the world's simplest process (you think you might be trying to do it the wrong way round), and somehow in the confusion Hippy gives a kick that delivers a painful-looking blow to the most vulnerable spot of the nearby herm. You finish the job and nervously step clear -- lots of bad luck today!"; If Getting Puffy Down has ended and Calming the Horse has ended: Now the chariot is unbroken; Otherwise: Now the player is in the yard. The horsey treat is an object. It is nowhere. The description is "Your man would know what's in these -- he's a wizard with the maned-and-hooved -- but as for you, you identify a general oatish consistency and then you get stuck." Instead of smelling the horsey treat, say "It smells a bit more horse-y than treat-y." Instead of eating the horsey treat, say "Despite the unkind things your Great-Aunt says about your overbite when she gets a few sherries in, you don't think your chompers are up to the challenge." Instead of giving the horsey treat to someone, say "This wouldn't be the worst gift you've ever given -- you're thinking especially here of the birthday you gave your Great-Aunt an in retrospect too-accurate replica of a gorgon's head -- but still, perhaps you'd better not." Instead of giving the horsey treat to Hippy: Say "Poor Hippy's evening hasn't been the gastronomical success yours has been, so she grows visibly more cheery upon chomping down the treat."; Now the horsey treat is nowhere; Decrement fright count. Instead of showing the horsey treat to Hippy, try giving the horsey treat to Hippy. The Portico is a room. It is west of the Peristyle. "The hexastyle entrance into the sanctuary of Eleusis has seen calmer evenings. A mob of the fellows swarm around its august pillars, unclear on direction now that the initiation has taken something of an unexpected turn. Directly before the entrance stands a statue, the final herm in the long chain running from Athens to Eleusis. [if Puffy is in the Roof]Atop the roof of the temple, Puffy is leaping and capering about like he's taken leave of his gourd (upon reflection, you think that might actually be what's happened). [end if][if Puffy is in the Portico]Puffy is collapsed against a pillar off to the side of the entrance. [end if][line break][line break]To the east, the peristyle promises some degree of peace, a small yard lies westward, and there's a small path running around the side of the sanctuary to the north. " Instead of going up while the player is in the portico, say "Getting up on the roof to help Puffy is a capital idea, but your vertical hop is ever so slightly not up to the task, and the pillars here don't have enough frilly bits to provide adequate handholds." Instead of climbing while the player is in the portico, try going up. Instead of jumping while the player is in the portico, try going up. The Final Herm is an object in the Portico. It is scenery. It is unbroken. The description is "Herms are little monuments sacred to Hermes -- the tell is in the name, most people don't know that -- which line the Sacred Way to Eleusis, helping protect it and fend off evil spirits and all that sort of thing. There's a rather ho-hum bust of Hermes atop a stone pillar, and an anything-but-ho-hum central attribute midway down that typically makes things awkward when it comes up in conversation with, say, one's Great-Aunt. [if the herm is broken]The unmentionable is rather the worse for wear.[end if]". Understand "bust/unmentionable/attribute/statue/hermes" as the Final Herm while the player is in the portico. Instead of doing something other than examining to the Final Herm, say "[if the Final Herm is unbroken]You're given to understand that these chappies are quite quite sacred, so best to keep one's hands firmly clear[otherwise]You don't have the expertise to effect any immediate repairs to the situation, and if you seem too interested someone might think you had something to do with breaking it[end if]." It is unknown. In the portico are some people called the mob of fellows. They are scenery. Instead of questioning the mob of fellows about, say "This is a relatively orderly mob as such things go, but you still don't rate your chances of having a successful conversation." Instead of asking the mob of fellows about, say "This is a relatively orderly mob as such things go, but you still don't rate your chances of having a successful conversation." The description of the mob of fellows is "Every once in a while you pick out a face in the mob -- isn't that old [one of]Stinker[or]Monty[or]Biffy[or]Tuppy[or]Gussie[or]Bingo[or]Corky[or]Nobby[or]Poppy[or]Oofy[at random] [one of]of Lydia[or]Timogenes[or]the Boeotian[or]the Areopagite[or]Eupolis[or]Cretensis[or]of Laconia[at random]! -- but overall the impression they give is of an unvariegated, panicked mass of humanity, much like a law-court jury when the dinner-bell's rung but a witness is still banging on." Understand "crowd/maniacs/fellow" as the mob of fellows. In the portico is the Sanctuary of Eleusis. It is scenery. The description is "The sanctuary is reasonably big as such things go -- you should know, you've been faffing about in and under it all evening. The portico and steps leading into it do what they can to impress, from the stately pillars to the delicately-painted pediment (or so you assume, your eyesight isn't the best, but Puffy doesn't seem the type of bird to skimp out on the little things). You remember your Great-Uncle once telling you why this sort of jobby is called 'hexastyle', but in your somewhat jumbled recollection it had to do either with the number six or with witches, you can't remember which, though probably that's neither here nor there (unless it's witches). Currently, the impression made by the old slab is somewhat undermined by the mob of maniacs milling about[if puffy is in the roof] and the high priest raving like a loon while dancing around the roof[end if].". Understand "steps/hexastyle/temple/entrance/pediment/portico" as the sanctuary of Eleusis. Understand "pillar/pillars" as the sanctuary of eleusis while Puffy is in the roof. Understand "pillar/pillars" as puffy while puffy is in the portico. Understand "roof" as the sanctuary of Eleusis. The small path is in the portico. It is scenery. The description is "This dirt-and-gravel number wends around the side of the sanctuary, offering some respite from the madcap scene in the portico." After deciding the scope of the player while the player is in the portico: place Puffy in scope. [Hey, another half-competent thing I did -- making it so the player can do a few things to Puffy, like examine him, while he's on the roof. I feel like my instinct would have just been to create another dummy object, so well done past-me] Before examining Puffy while Puffy is in the roof: say "You can just see Puffy, on top of the roof. He seems upset and a bit unsteady."; Stop the action. Before throwing something over Puffy while Puffy is in the roof: say "Beaning Puffy on the bonce when he's in a rather precarious perch might not be of the most neighborly. Besides, you mistrust your aim over this distance."; Stop the action. Before doing anything other than examining to Puffy while Puffy is in the roof: say "He's a bit too far away for that."; Stop the action. Before giving something to Puffy while Puffy is in the roof: say "He's a bit too far away for that."; Stop the action. Instead of singing while Getting Puffy Down is happening and the player is in the Portico: If the player carries the lyre: Say "A song might help calm Puffy's nerves, you think, so you start to serenade him with [one of]'hop lightly, hoplite!' [or]'I dream of a trireme'. [or]'rock me, Menelaus'. [at random]He puts his hands to the side of his head, poor thing, so to keep him from panicking further you strum the lyre as hard as you can, wresting some quite loud though admittedly slightly dissonant notes from the thing. Something must be going wrong, though, because now Puffy is at the edge of the roof, and now he's tottering even more, and now he's lurching towards you..."; Now Puffy is in the Portico; Stop the action; If Hippy is calm: Say "A song might help calm Puffy's nerves, you think, so you start to serenade him with [one of]'hop lightly, hoplite! '[or]'I dream of a trireme.' [or]'rock me, Menelaus'. [at random]He puts his hands to the side of his head, poor thing, but just as you despair of your music reaching him, Hippy catches your tune and starts to whinny along. It's quite loud, but only dimly musical -- you briefly wonder if horses hear music the same way as people do, but of course that can't be right because how would they even play a lyre? -- still, Hippy's heart appears in the right place. You're not sure Puffy appreciates it the same way you do, though, because now he's at the edge of the roof, and now he's tottering even more, and now he's lurching towards you..."; Now Puffy is in the Portico; Otherwise: Say "A song might help calm Puffy's nerves, you think, so you start to serenade him with [one of]'hop light, hoplite!' [or]'I dream of a trireme'. [or]'rock me, Menelaus'. [at random]You have high hopes at first, but then he puts his hands to the side of his head -- poor thing, he must have a headache -- and that blocks out your song. Your voice alone isn't doing the trick, it seems." Instead of taking the lyre when Alky carries the Lyre and the player is in the portico, try questioning alky about the lyre. Instead of questioning Alky about the lyre: If Getting Puffy Down is happening: Say "'I think it might have gone out of tune in all the confusion,' Alky frowns. 'Here, why don't you check?' He hands you the instrument."; Now the player carries the lyre; Otherwise: Say "'It's only my third best,' Alky says, as though in apology." Understand "play" as singing while the player carries the lyre. Understand "play lyre" as singing while the player carries the lyre. Understand "blow" as singing while the location encloses the pan pipes. Understand "blow pipes" as singing while the location encloses the pan pipes. [The pan pipes won't come until the finale, so this is confusing! Also, of course, this Understand statement would have been better off as a check rule for an action applying to the pipes, rather than this faked static grammar] Tuning is an action applying to one carried thing. Understand "tune [thing]" as tuning. Check tuning: If the noun is the lyre, say "The lyre doesn't sound quite right to you, but you can't say your ear is of the best. You whistle a few notes, then tighten some of the strings more or less at random, hoping that way at least it will look right." instead; If the noun is not the lyre, say "You don't think your tuning skills are quite up to the challenge." instead. The Yard is a room. It is west of the Portico. It is east of the Sacred Way. "[one of]This nice little yard, bounded by a low wall, is the kind of lovely, bucolic place you'd never be caught dead in if you had the choice.[line break][line break]The Sacred Way begins through a gap in the wall to the west, by which stands the penultimate herm on the way from Athens to Eleusis, and eastward lies the portico. A shed-like building, or possibly just a shed, stands to the south.[or]Besides the wall that encloses it and the penultimate herm, there's not much to this yard.[line break][line break]The Sacred Way begins through a gap in the wall to the west, and eastward lies the portico. A shed stands to the south.[stopping]". Instead of going west from the yard, say "You're certainly tempted to slink back to Athens, but you'd feel guilty leaving all this chaos behind you -- especially since the uncharitable might consider that you played a very minor role in bringing things to this point. Besides, it'd be a long walk!" Instead of going inside while the player is in the yard, try going south. The Penultimate Herm is an object in the Yard. It is scenery. It is unbroken. The description is "Herms are little monuments sacred to Hermes -- the tell is in the name, most people don't know that -- which line the Sacred Way to Eleusis, helping protect it and fend off evil spirits and all that sort of thing. There's a rather ho-hum bust of Hermes atop a stone pillar, and an anything-but-ho-hum central attribute midway down that typically makes things awkward when it comes up in conversation with, say, one's Great-Aunt. [if the Penultimate herm is broken]The unmentionable is rather the worse for wear.[end if]". Understand "second-to-last/-- bust/unmentionable/attribute/statue/herm/hermes" as the Penultimate Herm while the player is in the yard. Instead of doing something other than examining to the Penultimate Herm, say "[if the Penultimate Herm is unbroken]You're given to understand that these chappies are quite quite sacred, so best to keep one's hands firmly clear[otherwise]You don't have the expertise to effect any immediate repairs to the situation, and if you seem too interested someone might think you had something to do with breaking it[end if]." It is unknown. The yard wall is scenery. It is in the yard. The description is "This waist-high stone wall puts you in mind of all the times your Great-Aunt made you carry rocks for her estate's mason when she thought you weren't sticking to your studies. It's rather less than impregnable (the wall you mean, not your Great-Aunt), what with the large gap where the Sacred Way begins." Understand "gap" as the yard wall. The shed-like building is scenery. It is in the yard. The description is "Yes, definitely a shed upon closer examination." Understand "shed" as the shed-like building. Instead of entering the shed-like building, try going south. The placeholder way is scenery. It is in the yard. The description is "The holiest road in Attica -- though to be honest you're not sure how hot the competition is -- runs all the way back to Athens, which would be quite the hike at this hour of the night. The way is dotted with herms." Understand "sacred/herms" as the placeholder way while the player is in the yard. Understand "sacred way" as the placeholder way while the player is in the yard. Instead of entering the placeholder way, try going west. Hippy is a female animal. Understand "horse" or "ears" or "horsey" as Hippy. Understand "Hippy's ears" as Hippy. She is in the Yard. "Alky's horse Hippy is here, [if the fright count is greater than 2.1]wildly[end if][if the fright count is less than 2.1 and hippy is frightened]anxiously[end if][if Hippy is calm]calmly[end if] pawing the grass (well, hooving, perhaps)." The description is "Alky's horse, much like her master, is a good-looking animal with questionable self-control. [if Hippy carries the ear warmers]She has a pair of ear warmers jammed awkwardly on her head, doing their best impression of a pair of blinders. [end if][if the pig is in the yard and hippy is frightened and Hippy does not carry the ear warmers]She rears away from the pig, her wide eyes glancing and rolling every which way, like a rampaging Great-Aunt. [end if][if the pig is in the yard and hippy is frightened and Hippy carries the ear warmers]She rears away from the pig whenever she catches sight of him around the edges of the ear-warmers. [end if][if the pig is not in the yard and hippy is frightened and hippy does not carry the ear warmers]Her wide eyes are glancing and rolling every which way, like a rampaging Great-Aunt.[end if][if the pig is in the yard and Hippy is calm]Hippy seems to have made her peace with the pig now that she's a bit calmer.[end if]". Hippy is frightened. Hippy is unpetted. Hippy is sober. Hippy is unwhispered. She is unknown. [That last list of properties is almost poetry] Instead of tying Hippy to the chariot: If hippy is frightened, say "She's presently a bit too fretful for you to consider that an entirely safe course of action."; If hippy is part of the chariot, say "She's already all hitched up." Instead of tying the chariot to Hippy, try tying Hippy to the chariot. Instead of tying the rein ring to Hippy, try tying Hippy to the chariot. Instead of tying Hippy to the rein ring, try tying Hippy to the chariot. Instead of questioning an animal about something, say "An animal likely wouldn't be the worst conversationalist you've ever encountered, but you're still unlikely to learn much of interest." Instead of asking an animal about something, say "An animal likely wouldn't be the worst conversationalist you've ever encountered, but you're still unlikely to learn much of interest." Instead of telling an animal about something, say "An animal likely wouldn't be the worst conversationalist you've ever encountered, but you're still unlikely to learn much of interest." Instead of answering an animal that something, say "An animal likely wouldn't be the worst conversationalist you've ever encountered, but you're still unlikely to learn much of interest." Fright count is a number that varies. Fright count is 3. Every turn while the player is in the Yard: If fright count is less than 1: Now Hippy is calm. Riding is an action applying to one thing. Understand "ride [thing]" as riding. Understand "get on [animal]" as riding. Check riding: If the noun is not an animal, say "That seems like it would be ineffective and/or dangerous (you make a note to add that to the list of potential titles for your memoirs)." instead. [Isn't there a rideable vehicles extension built into Inform, you ask? There is, but I was largely frightened of extensions so unly used them under duress (this is still true, actually!] Understand "calm [something]" as calming. Calming is an action applying to one thing. Carry out calming: If the noun is not a person, say "That seems so calm it's practically inanimate." instead; Say "You'll have to be a bit more specific about how to accomplish that, sad to say." Instead of riding Hippy, say "Hippy's more of a chariot-horse than a riding-horse, which is convenient since you're more of a chariot-passenger than a horse-rider." Petting is an action applying to one thing. Understand "pet [thing]" as petting. Understand "touch [animal]" as petting. Understand "rub [animal]" as petting. Understand "pat [thing]" as petting. Understand "stroke [thing]" as petting. ["Pat" was from a British beta tester. The vagaries of English!] Check petting: If the noun is not an animal, say "You have a policy of only petting animals: everything else either doesn't like it at all, or likes it a bit too much." instead. Instead of petting Hippy: Say "You gently stroke the side of Hippy's neck. [if Hippy is frightened and Hippy is unpetted]Your touch seems to make her calmer -- a critique you've gotten from more than one lady friend, who evidently held that such things should lead rather to a revving up of excitement than the reverse.[end if][if Hippy is frightened and Hippy is petted]This doesn't seem to calm her down any further though -- as with Midas, you suppose that one touch pretty much does the business.[end if]"; If Hippy is frightened and Hippy is unpetted: Decrement fright count; Now Hippy is petted. Instead of giving the cup to Hippy: If the cup is empty, say "You're not quite sure what a horse would want with an empty cup (you're not quite sure what anyone would want with an empty cup)."; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is wine: If Hippy is drunk: Say "Hippy turns up her nose at the wine -- unlike many of the fellows here, she appears to know when she's had enough."; If Hippy is sober: Say "Hippy takes an experimental lick of the wine, then promptly inhales the rest. She emits a slight 'hic', looking calmer."; Decrement fright count; Now the cup is empty; Now Hippy is drunk; If the cup is full and the liquid of the cup is water: Say "Hippy drinks the proffered water, though it doesn't do much to alter her disposition (funny, that's just how water is for you!)"; Now the cup is empty. Instead of giving the plate of food to Hippy, say "The horse doesn't seem particularly interested -- her loss, you sniff." An animal can be interested or uninterested. An animal is usually uninterested. The pig is an animal. The pig is in the Yard. The pig is male. "[if the pig is in the yard]There's a pig hungrily rooting around the yard. Hippy shies away every time the pig comes near her.[end if][if the pig is in the workshop]The pig is awkwardly squeezed into the shed, making it rather crowded.[end if][if the pig is in the portico]The pig seems rather distracted by the mob and the commotion, not that you blame him.[end if][if the pig is in the side of the temple]The pig takes an exploratory sniff of the honey coming off the bee hive, but the buzzing -- and, you suppose, concomitant risk of stings -- puts him off.[end if][if the pig is in the peristyle]The pig trots around the courtyard, eyes bright and curious -- he likely doesn't get invited inside all that often.[end if][if the pig is in the telesterion]The pig scrunches up his snout and gives the puddle of kykeon a wide berth -- that's one thing he's not eager to eat.[end if][if the pig is in the closet]The pig noses over to the shoe bench, but seems disappointed to realize that nothing there is edible.[end if]". The description is "[if the pig is not in the banquet hall]Despite Hippy's dislike, this pig seems all right to you -- he snuffles over to you, tongue lolling out[otherwise]This pig, perched atop the banquet table and seeing to things with an admirable zest, inspires you to dare more boldly in your own gustatory exploits[end if]." Instead of taking or pushing or pulling the pig, say "This pig's admirable girth suggests that the question isn't so much whether you'd like to shift him about as whether he'd deign to be shifted." Instead of pushing the pig to a direction, say "This pig's admirable girth suggests that the question isn't so much whether you'd like to shift him about as whether he'd deign to be shifted." The pig is unknown. Instead of smelling the pig, say "You'd love to be able to explode the stereotype, but sad to say the pig is rather malodorous." Understand the command "lead" as something new. Understand "lead [something] to/-- the/-- [something]" as leading it to. Understand "lure [something] to/-- the/-- [something]" as leading it to. Understand "bait [something] to/-- the/-- [something]" as leading it to. Leading it to is an action applying to two visible things. Understand "tempt [something] to/-- the/-- [something]" as leading it to. Understand "[animal] [direction]" as leading it to. Understand "lead [someone]" as a mistake ("Try leading them in a direction instead"). Understand "bait [someone]" as a mistake ("Try leading them in a direction instead"). Understand "lure [someone]" as a mistake ("Try leading them in a direction instead"). Understand "tempt [someone]" as a mistake ("Try leading them in a direction instead"). Instead of leading Hippy to the chariot, try tying Hippy to the chariot. Check leading: If the second noun is not a direction, say "Just try leading them the direction you want to go." instead; If the noun is not a person, say "It remains sullenly immobile." instead; If the noun is Hippy, say "[if Hippy is calm]Leading Hippy all about the sanctuary might get her nervous again -- best for her to say put[otherwise]Hippy's a bit too worked up right now to follow your lead[end if]." instead; If the noun is not the pig, say "[noun] seems quite content where he is." instead; If the room second noun from the location is nothing, say "There are several fine directions you could traipse from here, but sadly that isn't among them." instead; If the pig is in the banquet hall, say "Further appeals to the pig's stomach are doomed to be in vain, now that he has a nearly-unlimited supply of nummies offered for his delectation." instead; If the noun is uninterested, say "The pig is focused on his stomach, and rather than pay attention to your beckoning continues rooting around the yard looking for something to eat." instead; If the player does not carry the plate of food and the player does not carry the lump of honey cake: Say "The pig perks up at your movement and seems to consider following you, but loses interest when he doesn't smell any food on you."; Move the player to the room second noun from the location; Stop the action. Carry out leading: If the player carries the plate of food: Say "The pig, every sense attuned to your plate of food, follows you to the [second noun]."; If the player carries the lump of honey cake and the player does not carry the plate of food: Say "The pig, every sense attuned to your lump of cake, follows you to the [second noun]."; Let destination be the room second noun from the location; Move noun to the destination; If the location of the pig is the banquet hall: Say "[line break]The pig squeals in delight as he makes olfactory acquaintance with the delectables on offer, and realizes that he's in hog heaven. He sets about like a none-too-agile gourmand: he hops atop one end of the table and begins snorting and gobbling his way down to the other, with such gusto that you hardly begrudge him the broken plates and spoiled food that are the inevitable by-product. He seems like he'll be occupied for quite a while, which should be a relief to Hippy."; Decrement fright count; Now the pig is uninterested; Now the pig is undescribed; Now the description of the banquet hall is "The banquet hall has rather come down over the course of the evening; the couches are deserted, and the pig perches atop the table, gobbling everything in sight (not that you blame him!)[line break][line break]You could give him his privacy by returning to the peristyle to the north."; Now the description of the banquet food is "The sm[unicode 0246]rg[unicode 0229]sbord looks notably less divine now that the pig is rooting his way through it. So far he's made it about halfway down the table, with olives, dates, figs, and grapes scattered everywhere in testament to his gusto. He's currently more or less standing on the roast and picking at the cheeses. The far end of the table is still more or less untouched, though the pepper pot, honeyed cakes, and toothpicks must surely be girding their loins for what's to come. [if the cup is undescribed]At the very edge of the table there's a single cup, tottering slightly whenever the pig takes an especially enthusiastic bite.[end if]"; Try going the second noun. [Whew, this was complicated, and I think mostly worked? It occurs to me I probaly could have piggy-backed (no pun intended) this on the PUSH OBJECT DIRECTION action] Instead of going a direction when the pig is in the location and the pig is interested, try leading the pig to the noun. Instead of answering the pig that "follow me/--", say "You're not quite sure how to conjugate verbs in the imperative case when you're directing them at an animal -- it's even trickier than that dashed aorist -- but in any event you'd more likely be successful if you gave the pig more material inducement to follow you." Instead of asking an animal to try doing something, say "In your experience animals are generally a bit hard to move with honeyed words of persuasion alone." Instead of asking the pig to try going a direction, try leading the pig to the noun. After going somewhere when the pig is not in the yard and the pig is interested and the pig is not visible and the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "The pig, feeling abandoned by you, trots back to the yard."; Now the pig is in the yard; Continue the action. Every turn while the pig is not in the yard and the pig is interested and the player does not carry the plate of food and the player does not carry the lump of honey cake (this is the first pig returns to yard rule): Say "The pig realizes that you don't have anything further to offer him and trots back to the yard."; Now the pig is in the yard; Every turn while the pig is not in the yard and the pig is interested and the location of the pig is not the location of the player (this is the second pig returns to yard rule): Say "The pig, feeling abandoned by you, trots back to the yard."; Now the pig is in the yard. The second pig returns to yard rule is listed last in the every turn rulebook. The first pig returns to yard rule is listed before the second pig returns to yard rule in the every turn rulebook. [Hey look, I figured out how to move rules around!] Instead of giving the cup to the pig, say "The pig doesn't seem interested -- he's more focused on filling his belly than wetting his whistle." Instead of petting the pig, say "He seems to like that!" Scaring is an action applying to one visible thing. Understand "scare [something]" or "shoo away/-- [something]" or "chase [something]" or "yell at [something]" or "shout at [something]" as scaring. Check scaring: If the noun is the pig, continue the action; If the noun is the player, say "You've heard people say that sometimes they scare themselves, but you've never had that happen to you!" instead; If the noun is Hippy, say "While scaring Hippy in order to calm her down has a pleasing counter-intuitive logic to it, your hard-won experience is that often such logic is counter-intuitive for a reason." instead; If the noun is a person, say "[Noun] might get a tad upset if you did that." instead; Otherwise: Say "Much like your Great-Aunt, it doesn't scare easily." instead. [You might remember that I had an Instead of scaring the player rule way up in Chapter 2 to get rid of hiccuping -- awesome to have the actual action definition all the way down here!] Instead of scaring the pig: Say "With a start, the pig recoils from you -- he's so frightened that he heaves himself up into a leap, just clearing the fence, and flees the yard. You feel terrible, though at least Hippy looks relieved."; Decrement fright count; Now the pig is nowhere. Instead of riding the pig, say "It would be beneath the pig's dignity to carry you around." Instead of showing the plate of food to the pig: If the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "The pig perks up, his eyes -- and snout -- raptly following the cake, and by extension, you."; Now the pig is interested; If the pig is in the banquet hall: Say "He's got more than enough of that now." Instead of waving the plate of food when the pig is visible, try showing the plate of food to the pig. Understand "wave [something] at the/-- pig" as waving when the pig is visible. Instead of showing the lump of honey cake to the pig: If the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "The pig perks up, his eyes -- and snout -- raptly following the cake, and by extension, you."; Now the pig is interested; If the pig is in the banquet hall: Say "He's got more than enough of that now." Instead of waving the lump of honey cake when the pig is visible, try showing the lump of honey cake to the pig. Instead of giving the plate of food to the pig when the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the food, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more (after the treatment the pig's given the plate, you're content to let it go)."; Now the pig is interested; Now the plate of food is nowhere. Instead of giving the cake to the pig when the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the cake, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more."; Now the pig is interested; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere. Instead of giving the cake to Hippy, say "You're not sure whether horses like honey cake, but you're quite sure that you do, so you decide to hang onto it." After dropping the plate of food when the pig is visible and the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the food, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more (after the treatment the pig's given the plate, you're content to let it go)."; Now the pig is interested; Now the plate of food is nowhere. After dropping the lump of honey cake when the pig is visible and the pig is not in the banquet hall: Say "You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the food, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more."; Now the pig is interested; Now the cake is nowhere. Throwing it over is an action applying to one carried thing and one visible thing. Understand "throw [carried thing] over/at/through/out of/the/-- [thing]" as throwing it over. Understand "throw [carried thing] [direction]" as throwing it over. Understand "drop [carried thing] over/at/through/out of/the/-- [thing]" as throwing it over when the second noun is the window. Does the player mean throwing the plate of food over the yard wall: it is very likely. Does the player mean throwing the lump of honey cake over the yard wall: it is very likely. Understand "throw [something]" as throwing it over while the player is in the yard. Instead of throwing something at something, try throwing the noun over the second noun. [this should really be "throwing it at" but I initially thought of the action to allow for chucking the plate over the wall, so the name stuck even as I started using it for other actions] Check throwing it over: If the noun is not the plate of food and the noun is not the lump of honey cake, say "You're not generally given to hurling things about willy-nilly (at least, not after that night in [']27)." instead; If the second noun is not the yard wall, say "Last time you started a general food fight, you came out none the best, so you'd rather not go hurling the comestibles about without a clearer purpose." instead. Instead of throwing the plate of food over the yard wall: If the pig is in the yard: Say "You whirl the plate like a discus, sending it spinning over the wall. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, leaving a decrescendoing series of 'oinks' in his wake. You miss the friendly blighter, but Hippy seems relieved to have more personal space to herself."; Now the plate of food is nowhere; Decrement fright count; Now the pig is nowhere; Now the pig is uninterested; Otherwise: Say "Last time you started a general food fight, you came out none the best, so you'd rather not go hurling the comestibles about without a clearer purpose." Instead of throwing the lump of honey cake over the yard wall: If the pig is in the yard: Say "You heave the lump of cake like a shotput, sending it arcing over the wall. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, leaving a decrescendoing series of 'oinks' in his wake. You miss the friendly blighter, but Hippy seems relieved to have more personal space to herself."; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere; Decrement fright count; Now the pig is nowhere; Now the pig is uninterested; Otherwise: Say "Last time you started a general food fight, you came out none the best, so you'd rather not go hurling the comestibles about without a clearer purpose." Instead of throwing the lump of honey cake over west when the player is in the yard, try throwing the noun over the yard wall. Instead of throwing the plate of food over west when the player is in the yard, try throwing the noun over the yard wall. Instead of throwing something over the pig, try giving the noun to the pig. Instead of throwing the plate of food over a direction when the pig is visible: If the second noun is up or the second noun is down: Say "The plate of food arcs to the ground, and the pig wastes no time. You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the food, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more."; Now the pig is interested; Now the plate of food is nowhere; Stop the action; If the player is in the peristyle and the second noun is south: Say "You whirl the plate like a discus, sending it spinning into the banquet hall. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, then squeals in delight as he makes olfactory acquaintance with the delectables on offer, and realizes that he's in hog heaven. The sounds coming from the hall are of a none-too-agile gourmand enjoying himself immensely: loud snorts and gobbles, and more than a few breaking plates. He seems like he'll be occupied for quite a while, which should be a relief to Hippy."; Now the plate of food is nowhere; Now the pig is in the banquet hall; Now the pig is uninterested; Now the pig is undescribed; Now the description of the banquet hall is "The banquet hall has rather come down over the course of the evening; the couches are deserted, and the pig perches atop the table, gobbling everything in sight (not that you blame him!) You could give him his privacy by returning to the peristyle to the north."; Now the description of the banquet food is "The sm[unicode 0246]rg[unicode 0229]sbord looks notably less divine now that the pig is rooting his way through it. So far he's made it about halfway down the table, with olives, dates, figs, and grapes scattered everywhere in testament to his gusto. He's currently more or less standing on the roast and picking at the cheeses. The far end of the table is still more or less untouched, though the pepper pot, honeyed cakes, and toothpicks must surely be girding their loins for what's to come. [if the cup is undescribed]At the very edge of the table there's a single cup, tottering slightly whenever the pig takes an especially enthusiastic bite.[end if]"; Decrement fright count; Otherwise: Say "You whirl the plate like a discus, sending it spinning to the [second noun]. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, giving a little hop to grab the plate out of the air as soon as it comes within leaping distance. He makes short work of the food, then cheerfully trots back to the yard."; Now the plate of food is nowhere; Now the pig is in the yard. Instead of throwing the lump of honey cake over a direction when the pig is visible: If the second noun is up or the second noun is down: Say "The plate of food arcs to the ground, and the pig wastes no time. You've seen some fellows with an appetite tuck into their chow like they mean it, but none of them have anything on this pig -- he gobbles down the food, gives a last dainty lick, then looks back up at you, eager for more."; Now the pig is interested; Now the plate of food is nowhere; Stop the action; If the player is in the peristyle and the second noun is south: Say "You heave the lump of cake like a shotput, sending it arcing into the banquet hall. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, then squeals in delight as he makes olfactory acquaintance with the delectables on offer, and realizes that he's in hog heaven. The sounds coming from the hall are of a none-too-agile gourmand enjoying himself immensely: loud snorts and gobbles, and more than a few breaking plates. He seems like he'll be occupied for quite a while, which should be a relief to Hippy."; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere; Now the pig is in the banquet hall; Now the pig is uninterested; Now the pig is undescribed; Now the description of the banquet hall is "The banquet hall has rather come down over the course of the evening; the couches are deserted, and the pig perches atop the table, gobbling everything in sight (not that you blame him!) You could give him his privacy by returning to the peristyle to the north."; Now the description of the banquet food is "The sm[unicode 0246]rg[unicode 0229]sbord looks notably less divine now that the pig is rooting his way through it. So far he's made it about halfway down the table, with olives, dates, figs, and grapes scattered everywhere in testament to his gusto. He's currently more or less standing on the roast and picking at the cheeses. The far end of the table is still more or less untouched, though the pepper pot, honeyed cakes, and toothpicks must surely be girding their loins for what's to come. [if the cup is undescribed]At the very edge of the table there's a single cup, tottering slightly whenever the pig takes an especially enthusiastic bite.[end if]"; Decrement fright count; Otherwise: Say "You heave the lump of cake like a shotput, sending it arcing to the [second noun]. The pig leaps after it in close pursuit, giving a little hop to grab the lump out of the air as soon as it comes within leaping distance. He makes short work of the cake, then cheerfully trots back to the yard."; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere; Now the pig is in the yard. [Ho hum, more needless copy and pasting] Whispering to is an action applying to one visible thing. Understand "whisper to [thing]" as whispering to. Understand "talk to [hippy]" or "whistle to [hippy]" or "sing to [Hippy]" as whispering to while the player can see Hippy. Check whispering to: If the noun is not a person, say "No matter how many sweet nothings you whisper, the [noun] is unlikely to surrender to your blandishments." instead. Instead of whispering to a person, say "The mood isn't nearly intimate enough for that!" Instead of singing while hippy is visible and hippy is frightened, try whispering to Hippy. Instead of whispering to Hippy: If Hippy is unwhispered: Say "You whisper some nonsense at the horse in a soothing, musical tone, throwing in an occasional nicker in case a spot of horsey impersonation helps matters along. Hippy does in fact look a bit calmer when you're done, though perhaps a bit confused about where you lie vis a vis the hominid-to-equine continuum."; Decrement fright count; Now Hippy is whispered; Otherwise: Say "After all the whispering you've already done, you fear that any more would just be leading the poor horse on." Instead of giving the ear warmers to hippy, try putting the ear warmers on hippy. Instead of putting the ear warmers on Hippy: If Hippy is not in the yard, say "This is hardly the time!" instead; Say "It takes a bit of prodding, shoving, and scuffling -- there's a bite or two exchanged in both directions -- but once you get the ear warmers on Hippy's head, they block off her view as if they were a pair of blinders. Once she gets over the excitement of the fray, she seems to settle down."; Now Hippy carries the ear warmers; Decrement fright count. Instead of taking the ear warmers when Hippy carries the ear warmers, say "They look better on her than they do on you." Instead of removing the ear warmers from Hippy, say "They look better on her than they do on you." The Workshop is a room. It is south of the yard. "The ambiance here in this workshop -- with its worktable, scattering of tools, and general aura of hard, honest toil -- makes you positively allergic.[line break][line break]A low opening to the north leads to the only-better-by-comparison yard." Instead of exiting while the player is in the workshop, try going north. Understand "fix [something]" as fixing. Understand "repair [something]" as fixing. Fixing is an action applying to one visible thing. Carry out fixing: If the noun is an animal, say "You truly have neither the desire nor the capacity." instead; If the noun is a person, say "Your Great-Aunt has impressed upon you that you should never try to fix other people." instead; If the noun is broken, say "That's a fine aspiration so far as it goes, but to carry it out you'll need to get more specific." instead; Say "That doesn't seem in need of your help (most things aren't)." [I don't think any player ever tried FIX HORSE - probably for the best - but the response amuses me] Alky's chariot is a vehicle. The chariot is in the workshop. "[if the chariot is in the yard]Alky's second-best chariot leans against the wall, rakishly askew just like its owner.[end if][if the chariot is in the yard and Hippy is calm] Its horsey conveyor snorts and paces, impatient to be getting off somewhere.[end if][if the chariot is in the workshop]Alky's second-best chariot is here, somewhat the worse for wear.[end if]". The description of the chariot is "Alky's chariot is a sporty little thing, with flashy gilded inlays and a low, sleek profile. [if the chariot is unbroken and Hippy is calm]Hippy is happily hitched to it, raring to go.[end if][if the wheel is broken and the wheel is part of the chariot and the rein ring is broken]Unfortunately, currently one of the wheels is listing, and the reins hang in tatters from their anchoring ring, somewhat limiting the chariot's top speed.[end if][if the wheel is unbroken and the wheel is part of the chariot and the rein ring is broken]The reins hang in tatters from their anchoring ring, somewhat limiting the chariot's top speed.[end if][if the wheel is broken and the wheel is part of the chariot and the rein ring is unbroken]Unfortunately, currently one of the wheels is listing, somewhat limiting the chariot's top speed.[end if][if the wheel is unbroken and the wheel is not part of the chariot and the rein ring is broken]Unfortunately, currently the reins hang in tatters from their anchoring ring, somewhat limiting the chariot's top speed. [end if][if the wheel is not part of the chariot and the rein ring is broken]Unfortunately, currently the reins hang in tatters from their anchoring ring, somewhat limiting the chariot's top speed. [end if][if the wheel is not part of the chariot]The chariot also currently violates the fairly strict requirement that chariots have at least two wheels.[end if]". The chariot is broken. Understand "axle/axiom/inlay/inlays/profile" as the chariot. Instead of pushing the chariot, say "[if the chariot is broken]It would be rather hard to do that given that Alky's chariot isn't in tip-top shape at the moment -- might as well keep it in the workshop until it's back up to snuff[otherwise]Pushing the chariot about by hand would be rather missing the point[end if]." Instead of pushing the chariot to a direction, say "[if the chariot is broken]It would be rather hard to do that given that Alky's chariot isn't in tip-top shape at the moment -- might as well keep it in the workshop until it's back up to snuff[otherwise]Pushing the chariot about by hand would be rather missing the point[end if]." Instead of taking the chariot, say "[if the chariot is broken]It would be rather hard to do that given that Alky's chariot isn't in tip-top shape at the moment -- might as well keep it in the workshop until it's back up to snuff[otherwise]Pushing the chariot about by hand would be rather missing the point[end if]." Instead of pulling the chariot, say "[if the chariot is broken]It would be rather hard to do that given that Alky's chariot isn't in tip-top shape at the moment -- might as well keep it in the workshop until it's back up to snuff[otherwise]Pushing the chariot about by hand would be rather missing the point[end if]." The chariot is unknown. The wheel is part of the chariot. It is a container. It is broken. The description is "[if the wheel is broken]You quickly diagnose the concern here -- a significant portion of the rim has been smashed away. With this much wood missing, it's currently somewhat-ineffective qua wheel. You'll need to effect some repairs before it's fit to turn once again. [end if][if the wheel is honeyed and the wheel is broken]The wood around the gap has been coated in copious layers of honey, like the world's most splintery baklava.[end if][if the wheel is unbroken]You've got the chariot wheel back in fighting trim -- you give it a delighted spin just to confirm.[end if]". The printed name is "wheel". Understand "rim/wheels" as the wheel. Understand "gap" as the wheel when the wheel is broken. The wheel is unhoneyed. The wheel is unknown. Understand "remove [wheel]" as taking while the wheel is visible and the wheel is part of the chariot. Understand "honey" as the wheel when the wheel is honeyed. Understand "honey" as the branch when the branch is honeyed. Instead of putting something on the wheel, try inserting the noun into the wheel. Instead of inserting something into the lump of honey cake, try putting the second noun on the noun. Instead of inserting something into the honeycomb, try putting the second noun on the noun. Instead of putting something on the lump of honey cake, try putting the second noun on the noun. Instead of putting something on the honeycomb, try putting the second noun on the noun. Rule for printing the name of the wheel: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. Instead of taking the branch when the branch is part of the wheel, say "After all that work bending it into place, you're not keen to take the branch out." A thing can be trimmed or untrimmed. A thing is usually untrimmed. The general aura of hard honest toil is scenery. It is in the workshop. The description is "You peer about for a moment before realizing that you've let your poetical streak run away with you." Instead of doing something to the aura of hard honest toil, say "Look, if you'd wanted anything to do with hard, honest toil, you'd scarcely be here in the first place, would you?" The saw is an object. The saw is undescribed. The saw is on the worktable. The description of the saw is "You've rarely seen a saw with such sheen -- it looks polished and sharp." Instead of taking the saw, say "Your previous experience gallivanting around with large, sharp objects has been such that you'd rather just use the saw in situ, if needed." Instead of cutting something with the saw, say "You're not sure that would appreciate a trim." Understand "toothy/apparatus" as the saw. Understand "toothy apparatus" as the saw. The worktable is a supporter in the workshop. It is scenery. The description is "You're more acquainted with tables than with work, but you think you've got this sorted out -- there's a flat surface, there's a toothy apparatus you recognize as a saw, then a jumble of miscellaneous tools, parts, and whatsits." Understand "surface/table" as the worktable. Understand "work table" as the worktable. The printed name is "worktable". Rule for printing the name of the worktable: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. Before taking the wheel: If the wheel is part of the chariot and the wheel is broken: Say "With much lifting and grunting, you pull the broken wheel free of the chariot's axiom (you think that's the word)."; Now the player carries the wheel; Stop the action; If the wheel is part of the chariot and the wheel is unbroken: Say "You're confident in the quality of your work, but not so confident that taking the wheel off and putting it on again willy-nilly sounds like a good idea."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. Instead of putting the wheel on the chariot: If the wheel is broken: Say "The wheel is still hors de combat, so replacing it would be premature."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "With even more lifting and grunting than it took to get it off, you manage to shove the repaired wheel back where it belongs."; Now the wheel is part of the chariot. Instead of inserting something into the chariot, try putting the noun on the chariot. Instead of putting the branch on the wheel, try inserting the branch into the wheel. Instead of inserting the springy green branch into the wheel: If the branch is untrimmed: Say "It's about the right shape, but what with all the knots and twigs and such, the branch hardly seems like a credible replacement for the missing bit of wheel right now."; Stop the action; If the wheel is not on the worktable: Say "You think you're onto something, but it's hard to fit the branch onto the wheel since the latter is wobbling about quite a lot [if the player carries the wheel]as you awkwardly juggle it[end if][if the wheel is part of the chariot]on its wonky axle[end if][if the wheel is in the workshop]on the uneven floor[end if]."; Stop the action; If the branch is unhoneyed and the wheel is unhoneyed: Say "[one of]The branch is about the right size and definitely bendy enough to fit in the place of the part of the wheel that's gone missing, but the trouble is that it won't stay in place -- and sudden alteration into non-circular shape is generally not a helpful wheel feature, from your understanding, especially given Alky's rather heedless style of driving.[or]The branch is about the right size and definitely bendy enough to fit in the place of the part of the wheel that's gone missing, but the trouble is that it won't stay in place without something holding or sticking it there.[stopping]"; Stop the action; If the branch is honeyed or the wheel is honeyed: Say "The honey helps glue the branch into place as you strain, bend, and shimmy it onto the rim of the wheel. You lash it all together with some tiny bits of twine you find lying around on the work-table, and at the end of it you've got a mostly-serviceable wheel."; Now the wheel is unbroken; Now the branch is part of the wheel. Instead of inserting something into the wheel: If the wheel is broken, say "Even if you could cram that into the gap in the wheel's wooden rim, you don't see how it would help." instead; If the wheel is unbroken, say "That's definitely a thought, but you're less convinced that it's a good one." instead. Instead of tying the rope belt to the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the frayed rope would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the rope belt to the branch while the branch is part of the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the frayed rope would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the frayed rope to the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the frayed rope would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the frayed rope to the branch while the branch is part of the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the frayed rope would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the boa to the branch while the branch is part of the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the boa would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the boa to the wheel, say "You're profoundly dubious that the boa would be able to hold up to the rigors of chariot-travel (at least as long as Alky's driving)." Instead of tying the branch to the wheel, try putting the branch on the wheel. Instead of going north from the workshop while the player carries the wheel, say "Your carefully-cultivated look wouldn't be quite as effective if you were lugging a wheel with you -- best leave that here." Instead of putting the honeycomb on the wheel: Say "You squeeze a generous helping of honey onto the wheel, making the wood on either side of the gap quite sticky. This turns the comb into a mashed lump of honey, wax, and deeply miffed honeybees, so you dispose of it posthaste (and lick your fingers clean best as you can)."; Now the honeycomb is nowhere; Now the wheel is honeyed. Understand "glue [something] open/-- with/to [something]" as glueing it to. Glueing it to is an action applying to two visible things. Understand "stick [something] open/-- to/with [something]" as glueing it to. Understand "smear [something] with/on [something]" as glueing it to. Understand "cover [something] with [the lump of honey cake]" as glueing it to. Understand "cover [something] with [honeycomb]" as glueing it to. Check glueing it to: If the noun is the wheel and the second noun is the lump of honey cake or the second noun is the honeycomb, try putting the second noun on the noun instead; If the second noun is the wheel and the noun is the lump of honey cake or the noun is the honeycomb, try putting the noun on the second noun instead; If the noun is the branch and the second noun is the wheel and the branch is honeyed or the wheel is honeyed, try inserting the branch into the wheel instead; If the noun is the wheel and the second noun is the branch and the branch is honeyed or the wheel is honeyed, try inserting the branch into the wheel instead; If the noun is the lump of honey cake or the noun is the honeycomb or the second noun is the lump of honey cake or the second noun is the honeycomb, say "This doesn't seem to be a case where making the situation stickier would accomplish much." instead; Say "That would be easier with something a bit more sticky." Instead of inserting the honeycomb into the wheel, try putting the honeycomb on the wheel. Instead of putting the honeycomb on the branch: Say "You squeeze a generous helping of honey onto the branch, making both ends quite sticky. This turns the comb into a mashed lump of honey, wax, and deeply miffed honeybees, so you dispose of it posthaste (and lick your fingers clean best as you can)."; Now the honeycomb is nowhere; Now the branch is honeyed. Instead of inserting the honeycomb into the branch, try putting the honeycomb on the branch. Instead of putting the lump of honey cake on the wheel: Say "You squeeze a generous helping of honey onto the wheel, making the wood on either side of the gap quite sticky. The de-honeyed cake is rather unappetizing, so you discreetly chuck it away (and lick your fingers clean best as you can)."; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere; Now the wheel is honeyed. Instead of inserting the lump of honey cake into the wheel, try putting the lump of honey cake on the wheel. Instead of putting the lump of honey cake on the branch: Say "You squeeze a generous helping of honey onto the branch, making both ends quite sticky. The de-honeyed cake is rather unappetizing, so you discreetly chuck it away (and lick your fingers clean best as you can)."; Now the lump of honey cake is nowhere; Now the branch is honeyed. Instead of inserting the lump of honey cake into the branch, try putting the lump of honey cake on the branch. [This is all fairly complicated, but for once not unduly so I don't think?] Understand "shave [branch] with/-- saw/--" as cutting. Instead of cutting the springy green branch with the saw: If the branch is untrimmed: Say "Using the saw, you trim off various of the unsightly knots, twigs, &c. until the branch is a smooth, smart-looking number."; Now the springy green branch is trimmed; Stop the action; If the branch is trimmed: Say "Any trimmer and it'd disappear." Does the player mean cutting the springy green branch with the saw: it is very likely. Understand the command "bend" as something new. Understand "bend [something]" as bending. Bending is an action applying to one object. Carry out bending: If the noun is not carried: Say "You'd need to lay your hands on the thing first."; Stop the action; If the noun is the branch: Say "The branch bends nicely, and springs back afterwards without a hint of a fracture."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "That's not especially bendy." Instead of cutting the set of cothurni with the saw, say "You could saw a few inches off the soles to make them normal boots, you suppose, but you don't quite see the point." Instead of tying the wheel to the chariot, try inserting the wheel into the chariot. Instead of inserting the largish chunk of amphora into the wheel, say "[if the wheel is broken]Ceramic's a bit too brittle to work as part of a wheel, even in these comparatively dire straits. Best stick to wood[otherwise]Look, you've got the wheel more or less set to rights, so best leave it be[end if]." Instead of putting the largish chunk of amphora on the wheel, try inserting the noun into the second noun. The jumble of miscellaneous parts is scenery. It is on the worktable. Understand "joint/joist/whatsits/peg/pegs/nail/nails/joints/joists/awl/awls/adze/adz/adzes/tool/tools/scattering/miscellaneous/miscellany" as the jumble of miscellaneous parts while the player is in the workshop. The description is "The saw you can make out, but otherwise your eyes glaze over as they take in a hodge-podge of pegs, nails, joints (you think), joists (perhaps?), adzes, awls.... If you're fuzzy on the nomenclature, you're even fuzzier on the usage of this miscellany." Instead of taking the jumble, say "You wouldn't have the faintest idea what to do with any of this." The hammer is on the worktable. It is scenery. The description is "You don't see a hammer here." Instead of doing something other than examining to the hammer, say "The presence of a hammer would be an important pre-requisite to that." Understand the command "hammer" as something new. Hammering is an action applying to two things. Understand "hammer [something] to/onto [something] with/-- hammer/--" as hammering. Understand "nail [something] with/-- hammer/--" as hammering. Understand "nail [something] to/onto [something] with/-- hammer/--" as hammering. Instead of hammering, say "The presence of a hammer would be an important pre-requisite to that." Rein count is a number that varies. Rein count is 0. [Another needless variable -- I could have just directly checked the number of things tied to the rein ring, I believe] The rein ring is part of the chariot. It is broken. Instead of taking the rein ring, say "That's rather embedded in the chariot's infrastructure." The description is "You know, you must have seen dozens of chariots over the years, but until this evening you can't say as you ever noticed this metal ring jobby where you attach the reins. [if the rein count is 0]Only a few shredded bits remain of the reins Hippy broke when she panicked[end if][if the rein count is 1]You've got one makeshift rein anchored in place, so everything's set so long as Alky only turns left[end if][if the rein count is 2]They're not factory-standard, but you've got two rein-analogues anchored in place[end if]." Understand "reins" as the rein ring. It is unknown. Instead of putting something on the rein ring, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of inserting something into the rein ring, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of putting the chain on the chariot, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of putting the rope belt on the chariot, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of putting the feather boa on the chariot, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of tying the feather boa to the rein ring: If the feather boa is part of the rein ring: Say "Your short-term memory is none of the best (unlike your long-term memory, which is awful) but you have a sneaking suspicion you've done that already."; Stop the action; Say "It may be a little unorthodox qua rein, but the feather boa should meet the need, and besides, you're sure Alky will like the colors. You knot it to the chariot, then throw in a few extra knots just to be sure."; Increment rein count; Now the feather boa is part of the rein ring; Now the feather boa is knotted; If the rein count is 1, say "[line break]That's one makeshift rein in, so everything's set so long as Alky only turns left."; If the rein count is 2: Say "[line break]There, that's brought the reins back up to regulation strength!"; Now the rein ring is unbroken. Instead of tying the rope belt to the rein ring: If the rope belt is part of the rein ring: Say "Your short-term memory is none of the best (unlike your long-term memory, which is awful) but you have a sneaking suspicion you've done that already."; Stop the action; Say "You're dubious that the frayed rope is a long-term solution to this rum critical-dearth-of-reins situation, but it only needs to get Alky back to Athens, you reason. You tie it extra tight just to be sure."; Increment rein count; Now the rope belt is part of the rein ring; Now the rope belt is knotted; If the rein count is 1, say "[line break]That's one makeshift rein in, so everything's set so long as Alky only turns left."; If the rein count is 2: Say "[line break]There, that's brought the reins back up to regulation strength!"; Now the rein ring is unbroken. Instead of tying something to the chariot, try tying the noun to the rein ring. Instead of tying the gold chain to the rein ring, say "A fabulous idea, but from what your tutor drilled into you about tensile strength, you suspect that trying to use a flimsy gold chain to redirect a galloping horse would be one of those acts of hubris the tragedians are always banging on about.". Instead of taking the rope belt while the rope belt is part of the rein ring, say "You'd have to untie it first." Instead of taking the feather boa while the feather boa is part of the rein ring, say "You'd have to untie it first." Every turn while the player is in the workshop and the chariot is broken: If the rein ring is unbroken and the wheel is unbroken and the wheel is part of the chariot: Now the chariot is unbroken. [This Every Turn rule is a bit of a kludge, but not too much of one I guess, given that various different actions that can lead to completely fixing the chariot] The Side of the Temple is a room. It is north of the portico and below the roof. "The path leads to a cozy, tree-lined nook off to the side of the sanctuary, which would be quite the place for peaceful contemplation were it not for the mob tramping about the portico[if Puffy is in the roof] and Puffy dancing one of your louder species of tarantella up on the roof[end if].[line break][line break]Of course, one of the things that would make it so suited for a piece of the said peaceful cont. is that it's rather dull -- besides all the trees, there's not much here besides the path leading back south to the portico." Instead of listening while the player is in the side of the temple, say "Below the hubbub coming from the portico, you also detect a low, buzzing drone (coincidentally also an epithet that's been hurled at you on occasion)." The temple-side is in the Side of the Temple. It is scenery. The description is "A row of pillars runs down the length of the sanctuary, so regimented and regular that you wonder how the architect made it through the project without nodding off. [if Puffy is in the roof]From this angle you can make out enough of the roof to confirm that Puffy has yet to see reason and come down.[end if]". Understand "temple/side/roof/pillar/pillars/sanctuary/portico" as the temple-side. Instead of climbing the temple-side, say "When your Great-Aunt called you a sloth, you don't think it was in tribute to your amazing skills at scaling scenery -- you briefly consider tracking down a sloth, dragooning him into doing this climbing wheeze for you, then letting down a rope-ladder, but on reflection you detect one or two difficulties with the thought." Does the player mean climbing the temple-side: it is unlikely. After deciding the scope of the player while the player is in the side of the temple: place Puffy in scope. Instead of singing while Getting Puffy Down is happening and the player is in the Side of the Temple, say "A song might help calm Puffy's nerves, you think, so you [if the player carries the lyre]strum a few notes on the lyre and [end if]start to serenade him with [one of]'hop lightly, hoplite!' [or]'I dream of a trireme'. [or]'rock me, Menelaus'. [at random]Sadly, he's off by the front of the temple, so you don't think he hears." The tall olive tree is in the Side of the Temple. It is scenery. It is unknown. The description is "There's a nice copse (or is it a grove?) of trees here, with one noticeably tall tree growing close to the side of the sanctuary, throwing out branches willy-nilly[if the green branch is undescribed] and with a particularly green and springy one growing fairly close to the ground[end if]. [line break][line break]Olive buds grow everywhere, though they look rather immature (you can sympathize). Closer inspection also reveals a sizable bee hive slung under one of the boughs." Understand "trees/copse/nook/grove" as the tall olive tree. Instead of climbing the tall olive tree, try going up. Instead of lighting the tall olive tree, say "It's been rather a touch-and-go sort of night, but ideally you'll still get invited back next year and setting a conflagration in the sacred grove would likely put that out of the question." Instead of taking the tall olive tree, try taking the springy green branch. Instead of pulling the tall olive tree, try taking the springy green branch. The olive buds are in the side of the temple. They are plural-named. They are scenery. They are unknown. Understand "budding olives" as the olive buds. Understand "olive-buds/olives/olive/bud/olive-bud" as the olive buds. The description is "Hard and bud-like, these olives will eventually be delicious, but there's a long way to go yet." Instead of eating the olive buds, say "Your plans for the evening would be slightly crimped by the severe digestive distress these olive buds would occasion." Instead of taking the buds, try eating the buds. The springy green branch is an object. It is undescribed. It is unknown. It is part of the tall olive tree. The description is "[if the branch is in the wheel]The branch fits snugly against the rest of the wheel.[end if][if the branch is not in the wheel]This one particular branch, a bit less than arm-length, seems especially springy and flexible. [end if][if the branch is untrimmed]It's quite nobbly with various knots, twigs, and bits of foliage. [end if][if the branch is honeyed]You've coated each end in copious layers of honey, like the world's most splintery baklava.[end if]". It is untrimmed. Understand "knots/twigs/foliage/knot/twig/wood/bough/branches" as the springy green branch. Instead of lighting the springy green branch, say "The branch is too springy and green to burn without spitting and smoking worse than a crew of Pireaus sailors." Instead of pulling the springy green branch while the springy green branch is part of the tall olive tree, try taking the noun. Instead of attacking the springy green branch, try taking the branch. Instead of taking the tall olive tree, try taking the branch. Before taking the springy green branch: If the springy green branch is undescribed: Say "You grab onto the branch -- because the wood is so green, it takes quite a lot of undignified bending and straining, but finally you're able to snap it off the tree."; Move the branch to the player; Now the branch is described; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. A thing can be smoked or unsmoked. Things are usually unsmoked. The sizable bee hive is an object. It is undescribed. It is part of the tall olive tree. It is unsmoked. The description is "This hive's sporting one of your bigger dents, as though it ran afoul of a particularly uncoordinated bear; honey oozes about the hole. Unsurprisingly given the threat to hearth and home, it's positively popping with bees, who are crawling about in patterns so complicated it makes your brain hurt to try to follow them. You feel bad for the blighters, since you've always liked bees -- your Great-Uncle took up apiculture a few years back, in point of fact, so you've got a bit of a family connection. [if the bee hive is smoked]Now that they're marinating in smoke, the bees seem fairly docile.[end if]". Understand "bees/honey/dent/hole/beehive" as the bee hive. Instead of taking the bee hive, say "Some honey would hit the spot around this point in the evening, but there are easier ways of getting dessert than abstracting it from under the chin-hairs of a swarm of bees." It is unknown. Instead of pushing or touching or attacking the sizable bee hive, say "You don't think you'd like the consequences should they take offense to that." Instead of eating the bee hive, try taking the bee hive. Instead of smelling while the player is in the side of the temple, say "There's a nice smell of honey, leavened by a slight olive-y scent as well.[if the hive is smoked] There's a hint of smoke to the air, too.[end if]". Instead of smelling the bee hive, try smelling. Understand "give [something] to [something]" as putting it on while the player is in the side of the temple. Does the player mean eating the bee hive: it is very unlikely. [I feel like this goes without saying (needed to disambiguate the piece of honeycomb, of course)] Instead of putting the lump of honey cake on the bee hive, say "They've already got rather a lot of honey stored up in their hive." Instead of putting the honeycomb on the bee hive, say "They've already got rather a lot of honey stored up in their hive." Instead of inserting the lump of honey cake into the bee hive, try putting the lump of honey cake on the bee hive. Instead of inserting the honeycomb into the bee hive, try putting the honeycomb on the bee hive. Instead of giving the lump of honey cake to the bee hive, try putting the lump of honey cake on the bee hive. Smoking it with is an action applying to one visible thing and one carried thing. Understand "smoke [something] with [carried thing]" or "smoke out [something] with [carried thing]" as smoking it with. Understand "burn [something] with [carried thing]" as smoking it with when the player is in the side of the temple. Does the player mean smoking something with the torch: it is very likely. Instead of lighting the bee hive, try smoking the bee hive with the torch. Reverse-smoking it with is an action applying to two visible things. Understand "put [carried thing] under [thing]" as reverse-smoking it with. Understand "hold [carried thing] under [thing]" as reverse-smoking it with. Understand "wave [torch] at/under [sizable bee hive]" as reverse-smoking it with. [Could have sworn I already knew how to do "with nouns reversed" to save myself defining a whole additional action, but here we are] Check smoking it with: If the second noun is not the torch: Say "Employing something that gives off smoke seems to be a sine qua non of that course of action."; Stop the action; If the noun is not the bee hive: Say "Besides imparting an unwelcome burning smell, you're not sure what that would accomplish."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Continue the action. Check reverse-smoking it with: Say "Short of allowing you to relive the childhood fun of a game of hide-the-stylus, you don't see what this would accomplish."; Stop the action. Instead of smoking the bee hive with the torch: If the bee hive is unsmoked: Say "Cringing away from the occasional over-bold bee, you hold the torch blindly up towards the hive until you think it's gotten an adequate dosage of smoke -- at least, the bees do seem a bit more lassitudinous in their buzzing now."; Now the bee hive is smoked; Otherwise: Say "Any more smoke might be a fire hazard." Instead of reverse-smoking the torch with the bee hive: If the bee hive is unsmoked: Say "Cringing away from the occasional over-bold bee, you hold the torch blindly up towards the hive until you think it's gotten an adequate dosage of smoke -- at least, the bees do seem a bit more lassitudinous in their buzzing now."; Now the bee hive is smoked; Otherwise: Say "Any more smoke might be a fire hazard." Instead of putting the torch on the bee hive, try smoking the bee hive with the torch. Instead of inserting the torch into the bee hive, try smoking the bee hive with the torch. Instead of waving the torch while the player is in the Side of the Temple, try smoking the bee hive with the torch. Before going up from the Side of the Temple: If Getting Puffy Down is not happening: Say "There's no need to climb to such vertiginous heights, thankfully."; Stop the action; If the bee hive is unsmoked: Say "You lay a preliminary hand on a low branch, but recoil when the buzzing of the bees rises to a menacing key."; Stop the action; Otherwise: Say "You haul yourself up the tree and thence to the roof, not without some difficulty."; Continue the action. The Roof is a room. It is above the Side of the Temple. The printed name is "Roof". "The first thing you learn upon reaching the summit of the sanctuary is that roofing-tiles have a decided tendency to slip out from under one if one isn't paying the utmost attention. The second thing you learn is that paying the utmost attention is not exactly on the menu when a deranged Puffy is gamboling towards you with an ominous glint in the eye.[line break][line break]'You!' he snarls (yes, you'd have to say 'snarls') -- 'you bollixed everything up! I'll beat you into a jelly!' You utter a note of protest -- if nothing else, this is rum doings after you came up here to help him! -- and do what you can to evade the lunge with which he apparently intends to commence the jellying process. Sadly, the roofing-tiles do not cooperate with your plan, giving out under you as you attempt to flee. Scrabbling about for an anchor-point at the same time Puffy is scrabbling about for your throat, the two of you meet in a less-than-brotherly embrace and immediately tumble off the roof." Every turn when the player is in the Roof: Now Puffy is in the Portico. Instead of questioning Alky about Puffy while Departing is happening: If Getting Puffy Down is happening, say "'Seems the kykeon rather put him out of his gourd,' Alky drawls. 'Someone will have to fetch him down soon, or he's likely to fall.' His eyes suddenly brighten, as though he's contemplating action: 'say, care to lay odds?' You shake your head -- it doesn't seem quite sporting, and besides, you're not sure who you could still touch for a spot of collateral."; If Getting Puffy Down has ended, say "'Yes, well done,' says Alky, glancing towards Puffy's slumbering form. 'Now he's once again the boring Puffy we all know and love.'" Instead of questioning Machon about Puffy while Departing is happening: If Getting Puffy Down is happening, say "'Poor fellow,' Machon says, looking up to where Puffy is gibbering about. 'It's like he's dancing to music only he can hear.' This is surprisingly profound for your cousin -- you wonder whether he's been slumming it with philosophers."; If Getting Puffy Down has ended, say "'I suppose he didn't get a nap earlier,' Machon says. 'Should have planned ahead!'" Instead of questioning Alky about Hippy: If Calming the Horse has ended: Say "'Thanks for calming her down, old bean,' Alky says. 'Ride back to Athens would have been rather bumpy otherwise.'"; Otherwise: Say "'Looks like she's got the collywobbles,' says Alky, turning over some ideas for what might help. '[one of][if the pig is in the yard]She doesn't like to be crowded, so that pig can't be helping[end if][if the pig is not in the yard]You might give her something to drink[end if][or]You haven't seen her blinders, have you? Those sometimes calm her down[or]Maybe give her a pat? Couldn't hurt, unless she bites[at random].'" Instead of questioning Machon about Hippy, say "'Oh, never met the fellow,' Machon says." Instead of questioning Alky about the pig, say "'Looks as though he likes his grub almost as you do,' Alky says approvingly." Instead of questioning Machon about the pig, say "'You know, I had a pig once,' Machon says. 'As a pet, I mean.'" Instead of asking Machon about "his/-- pet", try questioning Machon about the pig. Instead of questioning Alky about the bee hive, say "'A bee hive, you say?' Alky doesn't bother to hide the yawn. 'How interesting.'" Instead of questioning Machon about the bee hive, say "Machon perks up: 'My grandmother's third cousin twice removed is quite the beekeeper, you know! I'd visit him in the summers, helping him smoke the hives to calm the bees down so we could harvest the honey....' He get a wistful look in his eyes, and begins to drool." Instead of questioning Alky about the chariot, say "[if the chariot is broken]'That's both of our rides back to Athens,' says Alky. 'Be a pet and sort it out, would you?'[otherwise]Alky take an approving look towards the yard. 'Well, that's not the neatest repair-job I've ever seen, but at least you don't charge for labor!' You take the compliment in stride, though wonder whether that means you can touch him for the cost of the parts next time you're losing at dice." Instead of questioning Machon about the chariot, say "'I left mine somewhere out there,' says Machon, waving a cheerful hand towards the Sacred Way. 'I walked for the last bit -- helps one work up an appetite!'" Instead of questioning Alky about the wheel, say "[one of]'They're meant to be round,' Alky says. 'There my knowledge stops.'[or]'Sounds like a sticky situation,' Alky says.[stopping]". Instead of questioning Alky about the rein ring, say "'Hard to steer with that on the fritz,' Alky allows. 'I suppose I could try just telling Hippy which way to go....'" Instead of asking Alky about "the/-- blinders", say "'Oh, I might have left them at home, now that I have a think on it,' Alky admits. 'Well, the concept is straightforward, you can probably improvise something.'" Does the player mean questioning someone about the sizable bee hive: it is very likely. Instead of asking Alky about "leaving/going/exiting/athens/party/after-party/afterparty" while Departing is happening, say "'Well yes, the after-party's in Athens, but seems like one or two things remain to be sorted,' Alky says, casting a gimlet eye on the proceedings. 'Chariot, horse, and Puffy is the agenda, I think.'" Instead of asking Alky about "going/after home/party" while Departing is happening, say "'Well yes, the after-party's in Athens, but seems like one or two things remain to be sorted,' Alky says, casting a gimlet eye on the proceedings. 'Chariot, horse, and Puffy is the agenda, I think.'" Instead of asking Alky about "going to Athens/after-party/party/afterparty" while Departing is happening, say "'Well yes, the after-party's in Athens, but seems like one or two things remain to be sorted,' Alky says, casting a gimlet eye on the proceedings. 'Chariot, horse, and Puffy is the agenda, I think.'" Instead of asking Alky about "going to the/-- after party" while Departing is happening, say "'Well yes, the after-party's in Athens, but seems like one or two things remain to be sorted,' Alky says, casting a gimlet eye on the proceedings. 'Chariot, horse, and Puffy is the agenda, I think. Perhaps not in that order.'" Instead of questioning Alky about the Penultimate Herm while Departing is happening, say "[if the penultimate herm is broken or the final herm is broken]'Breaking a herm is quite a no-no,' Alky says with a disapproving tsk. 'Puffy might be in a spot of trouble once this is all cleaned up.'[otherwise]'Cheerful fellows, aren't they,' Alky says. 'I know one of the sculptors who turns the things out, they're quite the moneymakers.'[end if]". Instead of questioning Alky about the Final Herm while Departing is happening, say "[if the penultimate herm is broken or the final herm is broken]'Breaking a herm is quite a no-no,' Alky says with a disapproving tsk. 'Puffy might be in a spot of trouble once this is all cleaned up.'[otherwise]'Cheerful fellows, aren't they,' Alky says. 'I know one of the sculptors who turns the things out, they're quite the moneymakers.'[end if]". Instead of questioning Machon about the Penultimate Herm while Departing is happening, say "[if the penultimate herm is broken or the final herm is broken]'Oh, are they supposed to look like that?' Machon asks with concern.[otherwise]'I've always wondered whether they had anything to do with the mysteries,' Machon muse. 'Once things are calmed down and we're initiated properly, we should ask Puffy!'[end if]". Instead of questioning Machon about the Final Herm while Departing is happening, say "[if the penultimate herm is broken or the final herm is broken]'Oh, are they supposed to look like that?' Machon asks with concern.[otherwise]'I've always wondered whether they had anything to do with the mysteries,' Machon muse. 'Once things are calmed down and we're initiated properly, we should ask Puffy!'[end if]". The Overworld is a region. The Sacred Way and the Portico and the Side of the Temple and the Roof and the Yard are in the Overworld. The sky is a backdrop. It is in the Overworld. The description of the sky is "Not much to look at. Or rather, quite a lot to look at, it's just that there isn't much to any of it, if you see what I mean?" The moon is a backdrop. It is in the Overworld. The description of the moon is "Rather cracking, if you were the one doing the estimating." Instead of entering Alky's chariot, say "One doesn't typically lounge about in chariots -- there are far more comfortable places to while away the hours." Instead of riding Alky's chariot, try entering Alky's chariot. Chapter 4 - Sit back and enjoy the cutscenery The chariot driver is a person that varies. The chariot driver is initially Alky. [I seem to recall this short, linear sequence as being relatively competently coded, since I was starting to feel comfortable with Inform -- of course I promptly got overambitious for the finale puzzle, so we'll see what a disaster that winds up being] Instead of asking someone about something while the player is in the chariot, say "While engaging [Noun] in a spot of badinage is ordinarily delightful, what with all the whizzing about in chariots you're afraid distraction could lead to someone, possibly even you, fracturing their gourd." Instead of questioning someone about something while the player is in the chariot, say "While engaging [Noun] in a spot of badinage is ordinarily delightful, what with all the whizzing about in chariots you're afraid distraction could lead to someone, possibly even you, fracturing their gourd." Transit is a scene. Transit begins when Departing ends. Transit ends when the player is in the bedroom. When Transit begins: Now the description of Puffy is "[if Puffy is asleep]Puffy is crammed into the corner of the chariot, somehow still snoozing[otherwise]Puffy's knuckles are as white as the stones of his temple as he clutches the edge of Alky's chariot[end if]. [if the sacred-way herms are broken]He's emitting bleats of distress at the damage that's been to the herms.[end if]"; Now the description of Alky is "[if the chariot driver is Alky]Alky has always been a fiend for speed, and you can see why -- the wind is artfully tousling his hair and he's got quite the roguish, devil-may care aspect going.[otherwise]Alky's bent over Puffy, giving him little shakes and prods to get him to come round.[end if]"; Now the description of Machon is "Machon's trotting along in a chariot pulled by a horse who looks to be as rotund and as good-natured as he is."; Now the description of Hippy is "Hippy is somewhat burdened by carrying three people in a chariot that's intended for two, but she's still managed to work up to a frankly terrifying speed."; Now the description of the chariot is "The chariot is speeding along and giving off a rattling noise that makes you think bleak thoughts about the quality of your repair job."; Now the chariot driver is Alky; Say "The wind in your face is nice and fresh, and the evening is cool and bright as you race towards Athens. The one fly in the ointment is that you're rather occupied with holding the still-snoozing Puffy in place, since you're not sure he'd appreciate getting up-close-and-personal knowledge of the Sacred Way.[line break][line break]'You know, old man,' says Alky, reading your mind, 'it might be time to wake Puffy and see if he's sobered up any.'" Every turn while Transit is happening and the remainder after dividing the turn count by 4 is 0: Say "[one of]You think you hear a wolf howling -- or that could be you whimpering at how fast Alky is driving, it's hard to say.[or]The chariot hits a bump in the road and the wheel starts wobbling like your Great-Uncle after four o'clock on a Sunday -- thankfully it holds.[or]Hippy gives a loud snort, the likes of which you've only previously when heard when asking your man his opinion of your sartorial choices.[or]You pass another chariot pulled over to the side of the Sacred Way -- looks like they needed a nap before the after party.[or]You race past another chariot on its way to the after party.[at random]". Instead of pushing someone, try waking the noun. Instead of waking Puffy when the player is in the chariot: If Puffy is awake, say "He's awake now, for good or ill." instead; If the player is the chariot driver, say "Alky's rather taken that over, and you're busy enough trying to keep Hippy on course in the meantime!" instead; If Alky is the chariot driver: Say "You can't really get him to come around. 'Here, let me try,' Alky calls, and hands you the reins -- just as the road is about to make a sharp curve to the left."; Now the chariot driver is the player. Understand "drive" as driving. Driving is an action applying to nothing. Understand "steer left/right/--" as driving. Understand "turn left/right/--" as driving. Understand "halt" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "stop" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "brake" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "say woah/whoah/whoa" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "woah" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "whoah" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "whoa" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "pull reins/boa/rope/-- left/right/back/--" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "take reins" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Understand "pull left/right/boa/rope rein/reins/--" as driving while the player is in the chariot. Instead of pulling the rein ring while the player is in the chariot, try driving. Instead of pulling the boa while the player is in the chariot, try driving. Instead of pulling the rope belt while the player is in the chariot, try driving. Instead of pulling the left eye while the player is in the chariot, try driving. [I think this was from a disambiguation issue since I'd defined "left" as meaning the left eye for the toothpick/staying awake puzzle? You'd think a DTPM rule would have done the job, but apparently this is what I came up with instead] Check driving: If the player is not in the chariot, say "It's dashed hard to drive when one isn't in a vehicle, you've found." instead; If the player is not the chariot driver, say "Alky's rather in charge of driving right now." instead. Carry out driving: Say "Hippy doesn't seem especially inclined to take instruction from you, or maybe you've managed to confuse her, because she takes the curve a bit too wide -- the rear of the chariot sloughs past the side of the road, colliding with a herm as you pass it and shearing off its unmentionable (more bad luck!) At least this has the salutary effect of jolting Puffy awake, and the even more salutary effect of getting Alky to take back the reins.[line break][line break]Up ahead, Machon's chariot comes into view -- you're not sure he's noticed you, which is a bit worrisome given how fast Alky's still driving."; Now Puffy is awake; Now Machon is in the sacred way; Now the chariot driver is Alky. Every turn when the player has been the chariot driver for one turn: Say "Hippy doesn't seem especially inclined to take instruction from you, or maybe you've managed to confuse her, because she takes the curve a bit too wide -- the rear of the chariot sloughs past the side of the road, colliding with a herm as you pass it and shearing off its unmentionable (more bad luck!) At least this has the salutary effect of jolting Puffy awake, and the even more salutary effect of getting Alky to take back the reins.[line break][line break]Up ahead, Machon's chariot comes into view -- you're not sure he's noticed you, which is a bit worrisome given how fast Alky's still driving."; Now Puffy is awake; Now Machon is in the sacred way; Now the chariot driver is Alky. Understand "wave at/to/down/-- [something]" as target-waving. Instead of waving hands while the player is in the chariot, try target-waving Machon. Target-waving is an action applying to one thing. Instead of waving someone, try target-waving the noun. Instead of asking machon about something while Machon is in the Sacred way, try target-waving Machon. Instead of questioning machon about something while Machon is in the Sacred way, try target-waving Machon. Instead of scaring Machon while Machon is in the Sacred way, try target-waving Machon. Understand "alert [someone]" as target-waving while Machon is in the Sacred Way. Understand "warn [someone]" as target-waving while Machon is in the Sacred Way. Understand "shout at [someone]" as target-waving while Machon is in the Sacred Way. Understand "call at/to/-- [someone]" as target-waving while Machon is in the Sacred Way. Instead of target-waving Alky, try questioning Alky about Machon. Instead of asking Alky to try driving while Machon is in the Sacred Way, try questioning Alky about Machon Check target-waving: If the noun is not a person, say "That's not the sort of thing that typically appreciates a friendly wave." instead. Carry out target-waving: Say "You give [Noun] a cheerful wave." Understand "Machon's chariot/horse" as Machon when Machon is in the Sacred Way. Every turn when Machon has been in the Sacred Way for three turns: Say "Machon finally notices how fast Alky is coming up on him and while trying to get out of the way yanks the reins perhaps a bit harder than he ought. His chariot spins across the road, and inevitably given the way the evening has been going, smashes into another herm and sends its unmentionable spiraling out into the gloom. Fortunately, before he disappears out of sight behind you, you see Machon pop up none the worse for wear.[line break][line break]Less fortunately, Puffy, seeing the damage to the sacred statue, is now hyperventilating. 'Oh no oh no oh no,' he keens, 'it's been decades since a herm was broken -- they'll have my head for losing one!'[line break][line break]It occurs to you that Puffy missed the several previous instances of herm-destruction and perhaps should be made aware that it's a tiny bit worse than he thinks...."; Now the sacred-way herms are broken; Now Machon is nowhere; Cutscene-failsafe in five turns from now. [I learned how timed events work here -- pretty neat!] Instead of questioning Alky about Machon when the player is in the chariot and puffy is awake and machon is visible: Say "You draw Alky's attention to Machon and gently imply that he might consider slowing down. He snorts, then pulls back on his reins, which makes Hippy give a louder snort and decelerate sharply. The chariot kicks up a terrific clatter, which startles Machon -- he yanks the reins perhaps a bit harder than he ought, sending his chariot spinning across the road, and inevitably given the way the evening has been going, he smashes into another herm and sends its unmentionable spiraling out into the gloom. Fortunately, before he disappears out of sight behind you, you see Machon pop up none the worse for wear.[line break][line break]Less fortunately, Puffy, seeing the damage to the sacred statue, is now hyperventilating. 'Oh no oh no oh no,' he keens, 'it's been decades since a herm was broken -- they'll have my head for losing one!'[line break][line break]It occurs to you that Puffy missed the several previous instances of herm-destruction and perhaps should be made aware that it's a tiny bit worse than he thinks...."; Now the sacred-way herms are broken; Now Machon is nowhere; Cutscene-failsafe in five turns from now. Instead of target-waving Machon when the player is in the chariot and Puffy is awake: Say "Machon notices that you're trying to draw his attention and turns to call back a neighborly greeting -- then sees how fast Alky is coming up on him and while trying to get away yanks the reins perhaps a bit harder than he ought. His chariot spins across the road, and inevitably given the way the evening has been going, smashes into another herm and sends its unmentionable spiraling out into the gloom. Fortunately, before he disappears out of sight behind you, you see Machon pop up none the worse for wear.[line break][line break]Less fortunately, Puffy, seeing the damage to the sacred statue, is now hyperventilating. 'Oh no oh no oh no,' he keens, 'it's been decades since a herm was broken -- they'll have my head for losing one!'[line break][line break]It occurs to you that Puffy missed the several previous instances of herm-destruction and perhaps should be made aware that it's a tiny bit worse than he thinks...."; Now the sacred-way herms are broken; Now Machon is nowhere; Cutscene-failsafe in five turns from now. Instead of asking Puffy about "unmentionables" while Puffy is in the chariot and Machon is nowhere, try questioning Puffy about the sacred-way herms. Instead of telling Puffy about "unmentionables" while Puffy is in the chariot and Machon is nowhere, try questioning Puffy about the sacred-way herms. Instead of questioning Puffy about the sacred-way herms while Puffy is in the chariot and Machon is nowhere: Say "As gently as you can, you fill Puffy in on the damage to the other herms -- your idea is to warm him up to it with some broad generalizations about the fickleness of fate and the need to take a philosophical attitude of detachment with respect to the vicissitudes fortune pitches into the gentle stream of our lives from time to time, but he's glaring at you with sufficient force as to make you more tongue-tied than usual so eventually you just lay out that the evening's broken-herm quota has just reached four, rather than one.[line break][line break]The change in Puffy is immediate -- one doesn't like to label a fellow berserk, but sometimes that's the clearest word to hand. He gives out a bellow, and makes a grab for the reins, shouting about how he needs to go back and fix things (you're no stone mason, but this seems like a tall order, especially given the hour of the night). 'Steady on!' Alky calls, trying to shoulder Puffy aside, but the squabble has confused poor Hippy, who decides she will have none of it and skids to a halt. You and Alky manage to grab on for dear life, but Puffy, who luck is really not being kind to tonight, pitches forward off the chariot and, just to crown things off, fractures his bonce and one more herm in coming to a none-too-gentle landing.[line break][line break]You rush over to assist, but Puffy throws you off, looking now if anything more deranged than he did after drinking the spiked kykeon. 'You fools!' he screams, which is an unkind cut though you notice that Machon's now run up to join you, and with his addition maybe the group judgment is a fair one. 'You ruined the mysteries, and now you're bent on destroying the herms too? Well, I won't let you -- I'll beat you to the punch!'[line break][line break]With a cry, he levels a terrific kick at the unmentionable attribute of another herm, getting quite a bit of lift onto it as it flies clear, and is no sooner done than he's running to the next one down, bent on yet more destruction. You rush forward to try to rein things in, but Machon, somewhat confused by what's happening, tries to be a good sport and follows Puffy's lead by cracking up some herms of his own. Between the din of everyone's shouts, the panicked neighing of the horse, and the sharp explosions of fracturing statuary, all is pandemonium.[line break][line break]Eventually you and Alky are able to restore some semblance of order and talk Puffy down. You coax him back to the chariot and, once you reach Athens, bring him and the rest of the boys to your flat -- nobody's in much mood for the after party now, but after a nightcap or two and some rest you're sure everything will look better in the morning."; Now Puffy is in the bedroom; Now Alky is in the bedroom; Now Machon is in the bedroom; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "A nightcap or two turned into several more -- more, at least, than you can comfortably count with your head this fuzzy -- but as you thought, with the bright light shining down and your boon companions bunking down with you, things seem, if not exactly right as rain, at least more manageable than they did last night, when all the blasphemous vandalry was really getting you down. But now the birds are chirping, the gentle noises of commerce and socialization drift up from passersby walking and vending beneath your window, and there's a loud pounding, as of armored feet, coming up the stairs to your door... Hang on, that's rather less idyllic![line break][line break]Whoever's on the other side makes a prim little knock. 'Good morning, citizen. Are you awake? I'm one of the city's magistrates, and I have some questions to ask you about your whereabouts last night.'[line break][line break]The others are awake now, all suffering more or less from the fallout from last night's drinking and the dread of public odium. 'Look, we can bluff it out,' Alky whispers. 'Puffy, you can just threaten any fellow who squawks with expulsion from the mysteries, and without any evidence we'll be in the clear.'[line break][line break]He's confidently walking to the door to throw it open and walk the magistrate through the whole story, when Machon breaks in: 'small question, do you think they'd consider the broken-off unmentionables to be evidence?' He spreads out his hands to reveal an even half-dozen of the thing-gummys. 'I gathered up as many as I could, so you could fix them,' Machon says, looking over to Puffy.[line break][line break]'Oh, that was too kind,' Puffy replies with a gulp. 'Too kind.'[line break][line break]'Right,' says Alky, a grim set to his mouth. 'Bluffing's out then.' He grabs the chair from your writing desk and sets it against the door as a makeshift barricade.[line break][line break]Machon turns to you and hands over the unmentionables, shrugging as you accept them gingerly. 'Maybe you can put them out of the way, coz?' Then he and Puffy take up positions next to Alky."; Now the player is in the bedroom. At the time when cutscene-failsafe: If the player is not in the bedroom: Say "Alky, seeing that you lack the nerve to do it, takes the bull by its horns and fills Puffy in on the dreadful truth that there are now enough broken herms to make up a small drinking-party. The change in Puffy is immediate -- one doesn't like to label a fellow berserk, but sometimes that's the clearest word to hand. He gives out a bellow, and makes a grab for the reins, shouting about how he needs to go back and fix things (you're no stone mason, but this seems like a tall order, especially given the hour of the night). 'Steady on!' Alky calls, trying to shoulder Puffy aside, but the squabble has confused poor Hippy, who decides she will have none of it and skids to a halt. You and Alky manage to grab on for dear life, but Puffy, who luck is really not being kind to tonight, pitches forward off the chariot and, just to crown things off, fractures his bonce and one more herm in coming to a none-too-gentle landing.[line break][line break]You rush over to assist, but Puffy throws you off, looking now if anything more deranged than he did after drinking the spiked kykeon. 'You fools!' he screams, which is an unkind cut though you notice that Machon's now run up to join you, and with his addition maybe the group judgment is a fair one. 'You ruined the mysteries, and now you're bent on destroying the herms too? Well, I won't let you -- I'll beat you to the punch!'[line break][line break]With a cry, he levels a terrific kick at the unmentionable attribute of another herm, getting quite a bit of lift onto it as it flies clear, and is no sooner done than he's running to the next one down, bent on yet more destruction. You rush forward to try to rein things in, but Machon, somewhat confused by what's happening, tries to be a good sport and follows Puffy's lead by cracking up some herms of his own. Between the din of everyone's shouts, the panicked neighing of the horse, and the sharp explosions of fracturing statuary, all is pandemonium.[line break][line break]Eventually you and Alky are able to restore some semblance of order and talk Puffy down. You coax him back to the chariot and, once you reach Athens, bring him and the rest of the boys to your flat -- nobody's in much mood for the after party now, but after a nightcap or two and some rest you're sure everything will look better in the morning."; Now Puffy is in the bedroom; Now Alky is in the bedroom; Now Machon is in the bedroom; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "A nightcap or two turned into several more -- more, at least, than you can comfortably count with your head this fuzzy -- but as you thought, with the bright light shining down and your boon companions bunking down with you, things seem, if not exactly right as rain, at least more manageable than they did last night, when all the blasphemous vandalry was really getting you down. But now the birds are chirping, the gentle noises of commerce and socialization drift up from passersby walking and vending beneath your window, and there's a loud pounding, as of armored feet, coming up the stairs to your door... Hang on, that's rather less idyllic![line break][line break]Whoever's on the other side makes a prim little knock. 'Good morning, citizen. Are you awake? I'm one of the city's magistrates, and I have some questions to ask you about your whereabouts last night.'[line break][line break]The others are awake now, though all suffering the fallout from last night's drinking and the dread of public odium. 'Look, we can bluff it out,' Alky whispers. 'Puffy, you can just threaten any fellow who squawks with expulsion from the mysteries, and without any evidence we'll be in the clear.'[line break][line break]He's confidently walking to the door to throw it open and walk the magistrate through the whole story, when Machon breaks in: 'small question, do you think they'd consider the broken-off unmentionables to be evidence?' He spreads out his hands to reveal an even half-dozen of the thing-gummys. 'I gathered up as many as I could, so you could fix them,' Machon says, looking over to Puffy.[line break][line break]'Oh, that was too kind,' Puffy replies with a gulp. 'Too kind.'[line break][line break]'Right,' says Alky, a grim set to his mouth. 'Bluffing's out then.' He grabs the chair from your writing desk and sets it against the door as a makeshift barricade.[line break][line break]Machon turns to you and hands over the unmentionables, shrugging as you accept them gingerly. 'Maybe you can put them out of the way, coz?' Then he and Puffy take up positions next to Alky."; Now the player is in the bedroom. Instead of exiting while the player is in the chariot, say "You're going a bit too fast to make that a safe option!" There is a room called the Sacred Way. The Sacred Way is west of the yard. It has the description "[one of]The Sacred Way is called that because it's the holiest road in Attica, running all the way from the sanctuary in Eleusis back to Athens, but given the daredevil clip at which Alky is driving Hippy you'd be forgiven for transposing the c with the a in a moment of mental dyslexia. Trees whizz by at a terrific clip, and if you were better at arithmetic you'd be able to calculate your velocity based on how quickly you're overtaking the regularly-placed herms at the side of the road.[or]This road is very special, you're sure, but it's a bit hard to appreciate anything beyond the procession of herms at your current pace.[stopping] [if Machon is in the Sacred Way]Machon is driving his own chariot a bit ahead, though you're gaining on him at speed.[end if]". The sacred-way herms are an object. They are in the Sacred Way. They are plural-named. They are scenery. The description is "Herms are little monuments sacred to Hermes -- the tell is in the name, most people don't know that -- which line the Sacred Way to Eleusis, helping protect it and fend off evil spirits and all that sort of thing. There's a rather ho-hum bust of Hermes atop a stone pillar, and an anything-but-ho-hum central attribute midway down that typically makes things awkward when it comes up in conversation with, say, one's Great-Aunt. Sadly, things are a bit less protective back at the sanctuary as you've already seen two broken tonight[if Puffy is awake and the sacred-way herms are unbroken], and your bad luck steering Hippy's added one more to the count[end if][if the sacred-way Herms are broken], and between Machon's driving and your own you've added two more to the tally[end if].". Instead of doing something other than examining to the sacred-way herms, say "You're whizzing by rather too quickly to do anything like that." Understand "broken/-- herm/attribute/unmentionable/attributes/bust/busts/unmentionables/statue/statues/hermes" as the sacred-way herms while the player is in the chariot. Understand "broken" as the sacred-way Herms while the player is in the chariot. The sacred-way trees are an object. They are in the Sacred Way. They are plural-named. They are scenery. The description is "Probably these are olive trees? You weren't paying much attention on the way in, you must confess, and what with your present speed and the evening's darkness you think you've rather missed the chance for any detailed botanical investigations." Instead of doing something other than examining to the sacred-way trees, say "You're whizzing by rather too quickly to do anything like that." Does the player mean examining the hermes sandals: it is unlikely. [This is for disambiguation from the Herms, I'm thinking] Chapter 5 - Finale Hidden count is a number that varies. Hidden count is 0. Understand "hide [something] in/under [something]" as inserting it into. A thing can be inked or uninked. A thing is usually uninked. An unmentionable is a kind of thing. The printed plural name is "unmentionables". The description of an unmentionable is always "You'd really prefer not to get into details here, but each unmentionable thingy -- that might be a more pleasant nickname, 'thingy' -- used to be attached to a herm. Now that it's detached, it's a little less clear what it used to be and a nearsighted or very innocent person might just think it's a small stone cylinder?". Understand "thingy" as an unmentionable. Understand "thingys/thingies" as the plural of an unmentionable. There are seven unmentionables in backstage. A inkdingle is a kind of thing. The printed name is "inked unmentionable". Understand "inked unmentionables/thingys/thingies" as the plural of inkdingle. The printed plural name is "inked unmentionables". Understand "inked unmentionable/thingy/--" as an inkdingle. Understand "ink-blackened unmentionable/--" as an inkdingle. Understand "unmentionable" as an inkdingle when the player carries an inkdingle and the player does not carry an unmentionable. Understand "unmentionables" as the plural of inkdingle when the player carries an inkdingle and the player does not carry an unmentionable. The description of an inkdingle is always "You'd really prefer not to get into details here, but each unmentionable thingy -- that might be a more pleasant nickname, 'thingy' -- used to be attached to a herm. Now that it's detached, it's a little less clear what it used to be and a nearsighted or very innocent person might just think it's a small stone cylinder? This one has ink smeared on one end." An inkdingle is always inked. There are nine inkdingles in backstage. Understand "clean [inkdingle]" as washing in. Understand "wipe [inkdingle]" as washing in. Understand "wash [inkdingle]" as washing in. Instead of washing in an inkdingle, say "That's not likely to come clean -- at least not without making an even bigger mess." Backstage is a room. [...I think I created this because I couldn't figure out how "nowhere" worked] A thing can be hermed or unhermed. A thing is usually unhermed. Finale is a scene. Finale begins when the player is in the bedroom. Finale ends when the magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom. [...I also do not recall why the magistrate is actually a daemon?] First Timer is a scene. First Timer begins when Finale begins. First Timer ends when the player has been in the bedroom for 10 turns. Machon's Revelation is a scene. Machon's Revelation begins when First Timer ends. Machon's Revelation begins when Machon is broken. When Finale begins: Now the lyre is nowhere; Now the description of Puffy is "Puffy is doing what he can to hold the door closed, albeit with somewhat less enthusiasm than Alky or Machon. [if Puffy is hermed]He must have an unmentionable hidden somewhere inside his clothes.[end if]"; Now the description of Alky is "This doesn't seem like the first time Alky's woken up to a gang trying to break down his door -- even while bracing the door with all his strength, he looks rather bored. [if Alky is hermed]He must have an unmentionable hidden somewhere inside his clothes.[end if]"; Now the description of Machon is "It's a nice thing that your cousin is rather full-figured, as he's putting his considerable gravitas into keeping the door closed. [if Machon is hermed]He must have an unmentionable hidden somewhere inside his clothes.[end if]"; Let chosen unmentionable be a random unmentionable in backstage; Move the chosen unmentionable to Machon; First magistrate poke in 5 turns from now; Second magistrate poke in 15 turns from now; First team poke in 20 turns from now; Third magistrate poke in 25 turns from now; Second team poke in 30 turns from now; Fourth magistrate poke in 35 turns from now; Third team poke in 40 turns from now; Fifth magistrate poke in 42 turns from now; Magistrate entrance in 45 turns from now; Repeat with foo running through unmentionables in backstage: Move foo to the player. [Oh, now I remember, explicitly defining backstage was to make unmentionable-management easier. There was a lot of stuff here that I thought should have worked but didn't, so I tried a lot of alternate approaches to see if they would fix things (I think they mostly did, though there's still an errant bug or two in this section I haven't managed to track down] The magistrate-daemon is a person. It is nowhere. The magistrate placeholder is in the bedroom. He is a person. He is scenery. Instead of doing something other than examining to the magistrate placeholder, say "He's currently on the other side of the door, and hopefully will stay that way." Instead of examining the magistrate placeholder, say "From what little you can tell from this side of the door, he doesn't seem especially nice." Instead of asking the magistrate placeholder about something, say "You think he's going to be the one asking you questions soon enough." Instead of questioning the magistrate placeholder about something, say "You think he's going to be the one asking you questions soon enough." Understand "archon" as the magistrate placeholder. [Oh I see, I have the separate daemon so I could have this placeholder too for the player to interact with. Could have just added a property and made things simpler!] At the time when first magistrate poke: Say "'Citizen, did you hear me?' the magistrate calls through the door. His tone is polite, but you've been on the wrong side of enough judicial proceedings to know an act when you hear one. 'If you don't open the door, I will have to consider taking more drastic measures.'" At the time when second magistrate poke: Say "'All right, if that's the way you like it,' yells the magistrate. 'Let them have it, boys!' There's a rather loud crash as some uncalled-for force is brought to bear against your door. It's holding for now, but you worry your landlord isn't going to be best pleased with any more damage to the premises." At the time when first team poke: Say "Alky winces as the door absorbs another solid blow. 'Say, fellows, you've made your point,' he calls. 'If you bring your sister, I promise I'll make an honest woman out of her!' Alky flashes you a grin, as this throws them into confusion.[line break][line break]'Is this a fornication? I thought we were here about the herms,' you hear a peevish voice ask. There's more hubbub as they try to sort this out." At the time when third magistrate poke: Say "The blokes outside have stopped pummeling your door, as Alky's stratagem has left them flummoxed. But then a clear voice cuts across the din: 'Wait, was that Alcibiades? The rotter actually did seduce my sister, and I bet he did for the herms, too!' The wronged brother hurls himself against the door again, and the siege resumes." At the time when second team poke: Say "Puffy raises his voice in a shrill complaint: 'I'm a priest of the Eleusinian Mysteries, you know!' he calls. 'My person is sacrosanct!'[line break][line break]'That right?' comes the response. 'Tell me one [']o them mysteries, then, to prove it.'[line break][line break]'Er, I can't, I've sworn rather a lot of oaths,' Puffy says. 'But don't I seem trustworthy?' The answer this time is another heavy thump." At the time when fourth magistrate poke: Say "The door is really getting the worst of it -- it's shuddering more than your tutor did when he read your composition on the Persian Wars (though you must admit that the world is not yet ready for heroic verse to be written in a limerick meter)." At the time when third team poke: Say "With a roar, Machon surges against the door, wrapping his arms around either side of the frame and holding it together with main strength. Puffy, transported by this vision of valor, starts clapping -- you want to join in, but you fear Machon's only bought you a minute or two at most." At the time when fifth magistrate poke: Say "Your poor door is more splinter than plank now. 'This is it,' the magistrate yells, not without glee. 'Take these last moments to prepare yourself for justice!'" At the time when magistrate entrance: Now magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom. When Machon's revelation begins: If Machon carries an unmentionable (called the foo): Move the foo to the player; Say "Machon suddenly gets a quizzical look on his face. 'Say, I think I had one more of those broken bits I forget to give you.' Sure enough, he pulls out one more unmentionable and hands it to you. 'There you are!'". Rule for deciding the concealed possessions of Machon: If the particular possession is an unmentionable and Machon's revelation has not happened, yes; Otherwise no. [Look at me with my fancy "rule for deciding"!] The Bedroom is a room. The printed name is "Bedroom". "[one of]Your pied-[unicode 0224]-terre in the city provides you with a temporary base during the season -- though given present circs you'd prefer something a bit more castle-like. Beyond the essentials of your bed, a clothes-chest, the fireplace, and an empty shelf (usually your valet puts a vase of flowers here each morning, but lucky for him he's on holiday), the only other furnishing is your writing desk. The gang, plus your press-ganged desk chair, are braced against the door on the west wall that ordinarily only opens onto the stairs, but now leads to a mob bent on justice. There's also a window facing the door, looking down on an alley that presents a dismal prospect that's nonetheless appealing by comparison to the pickle you're currently in. Pity you're too high up to jump![or]You take in the furnishings at a glance: bed, clothes-chest, fireplace, shelf, writing desk. The gang, plus your press-ganged desk chair, are braced against the door on the west wall that ordinarily only leads to the stairs down, but now leads to a mob bent on justice. The window looks out on a rather dismal alley.[stopping]". Below the bedroom is the street. West of the bedroom door is the vestibule. The bedroom floor is in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "Your floor is both unexceptional and unexceptionable." Instead of pouring something into the bedroom floor, try emptying the noun. The gang is a person in the bedroom. It is plural-named. It is undescribed. The description is "The gang is doing everything they can to keep the hounds of the law at bay -- it's rather touching that they care so much, though now that you think on it their necks are as much on the line as yours is (and Puffy has quite a lot of neck!)". Instead of doing anything other than examining to the gang, say "Best not to distract the fellows." Understand "fellows/friends" as the gang. The chair is in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "This chair is your trusty friend when it's time to do a spot of writing, though due to Alky's interventions it's abandoned its career in support of the arts to serve as a barricade instead." Understand "barricade" as the chair. Understand "desk chair" as the chair. Instead of doing anything other than examining or taking or pushing or pulling to the chair, say "By helping keep the magistrate at bay, your chair is fulfilling its highest purpose. Best leave it be." Instead of taking or pushing or pulling the chair: Say "Your chair is currently playing a starring role in this drama, inasmuch as it's nigh-singlehandedly keeping the magistrate and his goons at bay, but if you did want to speed things along, you suppose you could dislodge it. Do you want to make this whole nightmare end that much sooner?"; If the player consents: Say "[line break]You remove the chair, making the barricade rather more of a notional concern."; Now the magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom; Otherwise: Say "[line break]No, indeed, best not." The chest is an opaque container in the bedroom. It is scenery. It is openable. It is closed. Two unmentionables are in the chest. The description is "Your [if the chest is open]open[otherwise]closed[end if] clothes-chest. [if the chest is open]Inside is a pile of your clothing.[end if]". It is hermed. Understand "clothes-chest" as the chest. After opening the chest for the first time, say "You pop open your chest, and are surprised to find, supernumerary to the typical freight of clothing, two unmentionables rolling around amidst the garments. Machon notices your confusion, and slaps his forehead: 'That's right, there were too many of them to carry, so I stowed the extras in your chest. I really apologize!'". The chest special-case rule substitutes for the reveal any newly visible interior rule when opening the chest. This is the chest special-case rule: Say "You open the chest."; Continue the action. The standard report opening rule does nothing when opening the chest. The pile of chitons is in the chest. It is scenery. It is an opaque container. The description is "Your man thinks you have too many clothes, but you pay for his services, not his opinions. Admittedly, your togs do make up a rather good pile, but there are still some substantial gaps in your wardrobe -- you've had your eye on this white mess-jacket down at your tailor's.... [if the pile of chitons is hermed]There's a barely-visible lump. [end if][if the pile of chitons is inked]There's ink everywhere.[end if]". Understand "stack/clothes/clothing/chiton" as the pile of chitons. It is unknown. Does the player mean inserting an unmentionable into the pile of chitons: it is very likely. The wardrobe-gaps are scenery in the bedroom. They are plural-named. They are unknown. Instead of doing anything to the wardrobe-gaps, say "This is hardly the time to contemplate your next clothes purchase!" Understand "gaps/gaps in/-- your/my/-- wardrobe/--" as the wardrobe-gaps. Instead of reverse-smoking an unmentionable with the pile of chitons, try inserting the noun into the pile of chitons. Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the pile of chitons: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the pile of chitons is hermed: Say "You think the first is reasonably well-hidden, but any more and the pile would look decidedly lumpy."; If the pile of chitons is unhermed: Say "You slip an unmentionable into the [if the pile of chitons is inked]ink-stained [end if]stack."; Move the foo to the pile of chitons; Now the pile of chitons is hermed. [Let me just note, at the first of many many Instead rules about putting unmentionables in different places, that I'm having to manually check whether the player is carrying one and abort the action if not. This is (one of the reasons) why using Instead rules for literally everything is dumb!] Instead of reverse-smoking an inkdingle with the pile of chitons, try inserting the noun into the pile of chitons. [Now that is a rule!] Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the pile of chitons: If the player does not carry an inkdingle: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the pile of chitons is hermed: Say "You think the first is reasonably well-hidden, but any more and the pile would look decidedly lumpy."; If the pile of chitons is unhermed: Say "You slip an inked unmentionable into the stack, smearing ink all over your clothes."; Move a random inkdingle carried by the player to the pile of chitons; Now the pile of chitons is hermed; Now the pile of chitons is inked. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is in the pile of chitons: Say "Taken."; Move a random unmentionable in the pile of chitons to the player; Now the pile of chitons is unhermed; Decrement hidden count. [You would think just "move the foo to the player" would be better practice here, but somehow it wound up behaving wonkily in practice] Instead of taking an inkdingle (called the foo) while the foo is in the pile of chitons: Say "Taken."; Move a random inkdingle in the pile of chitons to the player; Now the pile of chitons is unhermed. Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the chest: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the chest is closed: say "In your experience of putting things into chests, the process goes a lot more smoothly if you open it first."; Stop the action; If the chest is hermed: Say "Any more unmentionables in the chest would be pushing it."; If the chest is unhermed: Move the foo to the chest; Say "You chuck an unmentionable into the chest with a devil-may-care flick."; Now the chest is hermed. Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the chest: If the player does not carry an inkdingle: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the chest is closed: Say "In your experience of putting things into chests, the process goes a lot more smoothly if you open it first."; Stop the action; If the chest is hermed: Say "Any more unmentionables in the chest would be pushing it."; If the chest is unhermed: Move a random inkdingle carried by the player to the chest; Say "You chuck an inked unmentionable into the chest with a devil-may-care flick -- too late remembering that all of your clothes are in there."; Now the chest is hermed; Now the pile of chitons are inked. Every turn during Finale: If there are no unmentionables in the chest: Now the chest is unhermed. After closing the chest: Say "You close the chest."; If an unmentionable is in the pile of chitons and the pile of chitons is uninked and the chest is unhermed: Increment hidden count. After opening the chest: Say "You open the chest."; If an unmentionable is in the pile of chitons and the pile of chitons is uninked and the chest is unhermed: Decrement hidden count. Instead of giving an unmentionable to Alky: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If Alky is hermed: Say "Alky gives a quick shake of the head. 'Having one extra could have its advantages, but that's where I draw the line, old fellow.'"; If Alky is unhermed: Say "'I'll see what I can do,' Alky says, slipping the unmentionable into the folds of his clothing."; Move a random unmentionable carried by the player to Alky; Increment hidden count; Now Alky is hermed. Instead of giving an unmentionable to Machon: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If Machon is hermed: Say "'Sorry,' says Machon with an abashed smile, 'don't think I can keep track of more than one at once."; If Machon is unhermed: Say "'This is odd, since I brought them to give to you,' Machon says, accepting the unmentionable nonetheless. 'But I'm sure you've got this all thought out.'"; Move a random unmentionable carried by the player to Machon; Now Machon is hermed. Instead of giving an unmentionable to Puffy: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If Puffy is hermed: Say "Puffy blushes. 'No more, please!'"; If Puffy is unhermed: Say "'It is a sacred object, I suppose,' Puffy says, though he accepts the unmentionable with obvious reluctance."; Move a random unmentionable carried by the player to Puffy; Now Puffy is hermed. Instead of giving an inkdingle to someone (called the carrier): Say "It's likely going to be a close-run thing to get [carrier] to hang onto one of the unmentionables, so perhaps better to start with one that's not smeared with ink?" Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into someone (called the carrier), try giving the foo to the carrier. Instead of putting an unmentionable (called the foo) on someone (called the carrier), try giving the foo to the carrier. The can't remove from people rule does nothing when the noun is an unmentionable. Instead of taking an unmentionable carried by someone when the second noun does not carry an unmentionable, say "[Second noun] doesn't have one, so far as you know." Instead of removing something (called the foo) from someone (called the carrier) when the player is in the bedroom: If the carrier is the player: Say "You can't see any more lying around, thankfully."; Stop the action; Say "You take back the unmentionable you'd entrusted to [the carrier]."; [Move a random unmentionable carried by the carrier to the player;] Move the foo to the player; Now the carrier is unhermed; If the carrier is Alky: Decrement hidden count. [...OK, and here I've swapped from the "move a random unmentionable" to "move the foo" methods, for reasons deeply obscure at this late date] Instead of taking an unmentionable carried by someone (called the carrier): If the carrier is the player: Say "You can't see any more lying around, thankfully."; Stop the action; Say "You take back the unmentionable you'd entrusted to [the carrier]."; Move a random unmentionable carried by the carrier to the player; Now the carrier is unhermed; If the carrier is Alky: Decrement hidden count. Instead of questioning someone (called the carrier) about an unmentionable while the carrier carries an unmentionable (called the foo), try taking the foo. Instead of asking someone (called the carrier) for an unmentionable while the carrier carries an unmentionable (called the foo), try taking the foo. Instead of asking someone (called the carrier) to try giving an unmentionable (called the foo) to yourself, try taking the foo. The window is in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "[if the window is unhermed]Your window looks out on a nice, quiet alley[otherwise]The noise of you chucking an unmentionable out the window seems to have gathered a few passersby[end if]." Understand "dismal alley" as the window. Understand "dismal/alley" as the window. Instead of closing the window, say "You haven't sprung out for shutters, so the window is as the window will remain." Instead of opening the window, say "You haven't sprung out for shutters, so the window is as the window will remain." Instead of going down from the bedroom, say "You briefly contemplate a leap out the window, but it'd be quite the fall, and besides, you're not the type to leave your friends in the lurch." Instead of jumping while the player is in the bedroom, say "You briefly contemplate a leap out the window, but it'd be quite the fall, and besides, you're not the type to leave your friends in the lurch." Instead of exiting while the player is in the bedroom, say "You briefly contemplate a leap out the window, but it'd be quite the fall, and besides, you're not the type to leave your friends in the lurch." Understand "Jump out/through the/-- window/down" as jumping while the player is in the bedroom. Understand "climb out/through/-- the/-- window/down" as jumping while the player is in the bedroom. Instead of climbing the window, try jumping. Understand "look out/through [the window]" as examining. Instead of throwing something over the window, say "You might need that!" Window found count is a number that varies. Window found count is 0. [Yet another variable I didn't need to define!] Instead of throwing an unmentionable (called the foo) over the window: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the window is hermed: Say "There's a bit of a crowd out there now, but you toss out another unmentionable on the theory that -- well, you don't really have a theory but better there than here."; Increment window found count; Now the foo is nowhere; If the window is unhermed: Say "After quickly checking to make sure nobody is looking, you drop an unmentionable out the window. It hits the ground with a rather loud clatter, but that's the least of your problems right now."; Now the foo is nowhere; Now the window is hermed; Increment hidden count. Instead of throwing an inkdingle (called the foo) over the window: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the window is hermed: Say "There's a bit of a crowd out there now, but you toss out another unmentionable on the theory that -- well, you don't really have a theory but better there than here."; Increment window found count; Now the foo is nowhere; If the window is unhermed: Say "After quickly checking to make sure nobody is looking, you drop an unmentionable out the window. It hits the ground with a rather loud clatter, but that's the least of your problems right now."; Now the foo is nowhere; Now the window is hermed; Increment hidden count. Instead of putting something on the window, try throwing the noun over the window. Instead of inserting something into the window, try throwing the noun over the window. The writing desk is a supporter in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "A little writing desk you sometimes use for scribbling off whatever musical or literary ideas you have bouncing around in your noggin. It holds your trusty inkwell[if the paper is on the writing desk and the pan pipes are on the writing desk], a sheet of paper, and your pan pipes[end if][if the paper is on the writing desk and the pan pipes are not on the writing desk] and a sheet of paper[end if][if the paper is not on the writing desk and the pan pipes are on the writing desk] and your pan pipes[end if]. [if the stylus is on the desk and the desk is unhermed]Your stylus is also right at hand.[end if][if an unmentionable is on the desk and the desk is hermed]You've put an unmentionable on the desk next to your writing things. [end if][if an inkdingle is on the desk and the desk is hermed]You've put an inked-up unmentionable on the desk next to your writing things. [end if][if the stylus is on the desk and the desk is hermed] Your stylus would blush if it knew the company it's keeping![end if][if the Trojan Horse replica is on the writing desk] You've put your Trojan Horse replica on the writing desk -- now it can keep you company while you're writing.[end if]". Instead of inserting something into the writing desk, say "This isn't the kind of desk that has drawers, more's the pity." Instead of opening the writing desk, say "This isn't the kind of desk that has drawers, mores the pity." The examine supporters rule does nothing when examining the writing desk. The examine supporters rule does nothing when examining the shelf. The describe what's on scenery supporters in room descriptions rule does nothing when the player is in the bedroom. [It occurs to me that another whole category of stupid stuff I did in this game was to entirely disable things like the way Inform describes the contents of supporters or containers, then manually write my own version with overcomplicated descriptions, instead of just learning how to change the rules the way I wanted them] Before putting something on the writing desk: If the noun is the paper or the noun is the pan pipes or the noun is the stylus or the noun is an unmentionable or the noun is an inkdingle or the noun is the Trojan Horse replica: Continue the action; Otherwise: Say "Wasting your scant remaining moments putting inappropriate bric-a-brac on the desk doesn't seem wise."; Stop the action. The inkwell is a closed container on the writing desk. It is scenery. The description is "A tidy little inkwell, with a wide, easy-to-use mouth -- you just freshened the ink yesterday morning, when you were trying to work out the tune for [one of]'hop lightly, hoplite!'[or]'rock me Menelaus.'[or]'I dream of a trireme.'[at random]". Understand "ink/well" as the inkwell. Understand "ink [something]" as inking. Inking is an action applying to one thing. Check inking: If the player is not in the bedroom, say "No matter where you look, you can't see any ink about." instead. Carry out inking: Try inserting the noun into the inkwell. Instead of putting the inkwell on something, try inserting the second noun into the inkwell. Instead of inserting something into the inkwell, say "If you did that, you'd be in exactly the same predicament but with a little ink dirtying things up. After a moment's reflection, you're not sure that'd be an improvement." Understand "dip [something] in/into [inkwell]" as inserting it into. Instead of putting something on the inkwell, try inserting the noun into the inkwell. Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the inkwell: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; Say "You swirl the unmentionable in the inkwell, giving it a dose of the black and tarry."; Now the foo is nowhere; Let chosen inked be a random inkdingle in backstage; Move chosen inked to the player. Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the inkwell, say "Using your fast-diminishing time to get even more ink on the unmentionable doesn't seem like the wisest choice." Instead of doing something other than examining to the inkwell, say "Your hands aren't of the steadiest in a crisis, so you're afraid you might make an awful mess." Instead of pouring the inkwell into something, say "That would just get ink everwhere -- you might see better results by putting something into the inkwell." The paper is an object on the writing desk. The description is "[if the paper is uninked]A blank sheet of paper, standing ready in case inspiration strikes[otherwise]You've scrawled some nonsense across this paper[end if]." Understand "sheet" as the paper. Instead of inserting something into the paper, try putting the paper on the noun. Understand "wrap [paper] around [something]" as putting it on. Understand "fold [paper] around [something]" as putting it on. Understand "roll [paper] around [something]" as putting it on. Understand "wrap [something] in/with [paper]" as putting it on (with nouns reversed). Understand "fold [something] in/with [paper]" as putting it on (with nouns reversed). Understand "roll [something] in/with [paper]" as putting it on (with nouns reversed). Instead of putting the paper on something, say "That would leave quite the obvious lump, so you can't really see where it would get you." Understand "roll [paper]" as a mistake ("This isn't the best time for any paper-based fidgeting -- your tutor always drilled into you that if you're not going to write on it, you should leave a sheet of paper alone."). Understand "fold [paper]" as a mistake ("This isn't the best time for any paper-based fidgeting -- your tutor always drilled into you that if you're not going to write on it, you should leave a sheet of paper alone."). Understand "wrap [paper]" as a mistake ("This isn't the best time for any paper-based fidgeting -- your tutor always drilled into you that if you're not going to write on it, you should leave a sheet of paper alone."). Understand the command "write" as something new. Understand "write on [something] with [something carried]" as writing it with. Understand "scribble on [something] with [something carried]" as writing it with. Writing it with is an action applying to one thing and one carried thing. Check writing it with: If the second noun is uninked, say "You're fairly confident that step one in this process involves having something with which to deploy ink." instead; If the noun is not the paper, say "That would make a frightful mess." instead. Carry out writing it with: If the paper is inked: Say "This must be writer's block -- you can't think of what else to add."; Stop the action; If the second noun is the stylus, say "Using the [noun], you dash off the first thing that comes to mind."; If the second noun is an inkdingle, say "Using the [noun], you dash off the first thing that comes to mind. As an unmentionable dipped in ink is not an ideal writing instrument, your handwriting is somewhat worse than usual."; Now the paper is inked; Now the printing of the paper is "The paper says 'this rummy magistrate can soak his head.' Socrates himself couldn't have written truer words!"; If the stylus is not on the writing desk and the paper is on the desk and an inkdingle is on the desk: Increment hidden count. Does the player mean writing the paper with the stylus: it is very likely. Does the player mean writing the paper with an inkdingle: it is likely. Does the player mean writing the paper with an unmentionable: it is very unlikely. Instead of showing the paper to someone when the paper is inked, say "No one can ever read your handwriting so even were you not under imminent risk of arrest, that wouldn't be especially helpful." Understand "rub [something] on [paper]" as writing it with (with nouns reversed). Instead of putting an inkdingle on the paper, try writing the second noun with the noun. Instead of taking the paper when the paper is on the writing desk: Say "Taken."; Now the player carries the paper; If the stylus is not on the writing desk and an inkdingle is on the writing desk and the paper is inked: Decrement hidden count. After putting the paper on the writing desk: Say "You put the sheet of paper back onto the desk."; If the paper is inked and the stylus is not on the desk and an inkdingle is on the desk: Increment hidden count. Before putting an unmentionable on the writing desk while the writing desk is hermed: Say "More than one unmentionable on the desk will certainly draw too much attention!"; Stop the action. After putting an unmentionable on the writing desk: Say "You put the unmentionable on the writing desk, near the inkwell. Inasmuch as it's not the type of thing one likes to have at hand while engaged in literary pursuits, it rather sticks out."; Now the writing desk is hermed. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is on the writing desk: Say "Taken."; Now the player carries the foo; Now the writing desk is unhermed. Before putting an inkdingle on the writing desk while the writing desk is hermed: Say "More than one unmentionable on the desk will certainly draw too much attention!"; Stop the action. After putting an inkdingle on the writing desk: say "You put the inked unmentionable on the writing desk, near the inkwell. To an undiscerning eye, it looks like a stylus set carelessly down mid-jot."; Now the writing desk is hermed; If the stylus is not on the writing desk and the paper is on the writing desk and the paper is inked: Increment hidden count. Instead of taking an inkdingle (called the foo) when the foo is on the writing desk: Say "Taken."; Now the player carries the foo; Now the writing desk is unhermed; If the stylus is not on the writing desk and the paper is on the writing desk and the paper is inked: Decrement hidden count. The stylus is an object on the writing desk. It is undescribed. The description is "A stylus, used for writing down those thoughts you deem worthy to pass down to posterity. It doesn't see a lot of use. [if the stylus is inked]It's got a generous dollop of ink on its tip." Understand "pen" as the stylus. Understand "fill [stylus] with [inkwell]" as inserting it into. Understand "dollop" as the stylus while the stylus is inked. Instead of inserting the stylus into the inkwell: If the stylus is uninked: Say "You swirl the stylus around in the inkwell to get it ready for a spot of writing."; Now the stylus is inked; Stop the action; If the stylus is inked: Say "You've got enough ink for now." After taking the stylus: If an inkdingle is on the writing desk and the paper is on the writing desk and the paper is inked: Increment hidden count; Say "Taken."; Now the stylus is described. After putting the stylus on the writing desk: Say "You put the stylus back on your desk."; If the paper is on the writing desk and the paper is inked and an inkdingle is on the desk: Decrement the hidden count. The pan pipes are an object on the writing desk. The pan pipes are plural-named. The description is "[if the pan pipes are unhermed]A small set of pan pipes, with loose leather straps holding the small reeds together.[otherwise]A small set of pan pipes, with a decidedly non-hollow addition tied to the reeds.[end if] [if the pan pipes are inked]You wouldn't want to play these until they've had a thorough cleaning, what with all the ink smeared on them.[end if]". Understand "leather/pipe/-- straps/reeds/reed" as the pan pipes. Instead of removing an unmentionable (called the foo) from the writing desk when the foo is part of the pan pipes: If an inkdingle (called the foo2) is on the writing desk: Try taking the foo2; Otherwise: Say "You tied those knots very tight, as it turns out.". [Ooof, can't quite tell what's going on here but looks like another kludge] The can't take component parts rule does nothing when the noun is an unmentionable and the noun is part of the pan pipes. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is part of the pan pipes, say "You tied those knots very tight, as it turns out." Instead of tying an unmentionable to the pan pipes: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the pan pipes are hermed: Say "Try as you might, you can't make the leather straps stretch enough to tie a second one in."; If the pan pipes are unhermed: Say "You add an unmentionable to the end of the set of pipes, and lash it into place."; Now a random unmentionable carried by the player is part of the pan pipes; Now the pan pipes are hermed; If the pan pipes are uninked: Increment hidden count. Instead of tying an inkdingle to the pan pipes: If the player does not carry an inkdingle: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the pan pipes are hermed: Say "Try as you might, you can't make the leather straps stretch enough to tie a second one in."; If the pan pipes are unhermed: Say "You add an inked unmentionable to the end of the set of pipes, and lash it into place, only slightly smearing ink all over the place."; Now a random inkdingle carried by the player is part of the pan pipes; Now the pan pipes are inked; Now the pan pipes are hermed. Instead of putting an unmentionable (called the foo) on the pan pipes, try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of putting the pan pipes on an unmentionable (called the foo), try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of tying the pan pipes to an unmentionable (called the foo), try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the pan pipes, try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of putting an inkdingle (called the foo) on the pan pipes, try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of putting the pan pipes on an inkdingle (called the foo), try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of tying the pan pipes to an inkdingle (called the foo), try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of inserting an inkdingle (called the foo) into the pan pipes, try tying the foo to the pan pipes. Instead of untying the pan pipes, say "You tied those knots very tight, as it turns out." Instead of untying an unmentionable (called the foo), say "You tied those knots very tight, as it turns out." Instead of untying an inkdingle (called the foo) when the foo is part of the pan pipes, say "You tied those knots very tight, as it turns out." Understand "play pan/-- pipes/reeds" as singing while the pan pipes are visible. Instead of singing while the player is in the bedroom, say "It's hard to concentrate on music at a time like this." Instead of dancing while the player is in the bedroom, say "At a time like this?" Instead of joking while the player is in the bedroom, say "At a time like this?" Does the player mean removing an unmentionable (called the foo) from the pan pipes while the foo is part of the pan pipes: it is very unlikely. The fireplace is a container in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "This fireplace has a few [if the wood stack is afire]currently-burning[otherwise]sad[end if] pieces of wood stacked together[if the flint is in the fireplace], with a flint lying on the hearth[end if]. [if the fireplace is hermed and an inkdingle is in the fireplace]There's an ink-blackened unmentionable nestled amongst the wood, blending in nicely.[end if][if the fireplace is hermed and an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is afire]There's an unmentionable nestled amongst the burning wood, with the ash and smoke letting it fit right in.[end if][if the fireplace is hermed and an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is unafire]There's an unmentionable nestled amongst the wood, its white stone somewhat out of place next to the blackened wood.[end if]". Instead of lighting the fireplace, try lighting the wood stack. Instead of smoking the fireplace with something, try lighting the wood stack. Understand "hearth" as the fireplace. [Yet another overcomplicated implementation - I probably could have had the fireplace and wood all be the same object and made life easier] The examine containers rule does nothing when examining the fireplace. Instead of touching the fireplace, try touching the wood stack. Instead of taking the wood stack, try touching the wood stack. Instead of taking the fireplace, try touching the wood stack. Instead of touching the wood stack, say "[if the wood stack is afire]You think it was two or three years ago that you realized you shouldn't touch things while they're on fire -- it's been quite the life-changer![otherwise]Your man has made the stack up so nicely, and you'll never do it half as well if you start playing with it." The ashes are scenery. They are in the fireplace. Instead of doing something to the ashes, say "Your man keeps your fireplace quite clean -- the wood may be charred, but there are no ashes to speak of here." Instead of putting the ashes on an unmentionable, say "A nice idea, but there are no ashes at hand." Instead of putting an unmentionable on the ashes, say "A nice idea, but there are no ashes at hand." Instead of inserting an unmentionable into the ashes, say "A nice idea, but there are no ashes at hand." Instead of putting the ashes on an inkdingle, say "That's already quite sufficiently blackened, and in any event there are no ashes at hand." Instead of putting an inkdingle on the ashes, say "That's already quite sufficiently blackened, and in any event there are no ashes at hand." Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the ashes, say "That's already quite sufficiently blackened, and in any event there are no ashes at hand."Understand "ash" as the ashes. The wood stack is in the fireplace. It is scenery. The description is "A teetering stack of charred firewood (you try to reuse things when you can)[if the wood stack is afire] burning rather more cheerfully than you feel[end if]. [if an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is afire]There's an unmentionable nestled amongst the burning wood, with the ash and smoke letting it fit right in.[end if][if an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is unafire]There's an unmentionable nestled amongst the wood, its white stone somewhat out of place next to the blackened wood.[end if][if an inkdingle is in the fireplace]There's an ink-blackened unmentionable nestled amongst the wood, blending in nicely.[end if]". Understand "fire/firewood" as the wood stack. Instead of inserting something into the wood stack, try inserting the noun into the fireplace. Instead of reverse-smoking something with the wood stack, try inserting the noun into the wood stack. The flint is in the fireplace. It is undescribed. The description is "A stone jobby that makes a right smashing fire when hit against a likely piece of steel -- you usually use your knife. Hang on..." After taking the flint: Say "Taken."; Now the flint is described. The can't remove from people rule does nothing when the noun is the knife and the player is in the bedroom. Instead of taking the knife when the Knife is carried by puffy: If the player is in the bedroom: Say "At your importunement, Puffy gladly hands over the knife."; Now the player carries the knife; Otherwise: Say "You start to ask for your knife back, but it might be misconstrued as a rather tactless request, seeing how Puffy's initiating you into the fathomless mysteries that turn men into gods. Maybe you'll just drop a hint later on.". Instead of asking puffy to try giving the knife to the player, try taking the knife. Instead of attacking the flint while the player carries the knife, say "With time somewhat of the essence, you can take all this step-by-step rigmarole as read, and jump straight to lighting whatever it is you'd like to burn." Instead of attacking the knife while the player carries the flint, say "With time somewhat of the essence, you can take all this step-by-step rigmarole as read, and jump straight to lighting whatever it is you'd like to burn." Instead of putting the knife on the flint, say "With time somewhat of the essence, you can take all this step-by-step rigmarole as read, and jump straight to lighting whatever it is you'd like to burn." Instead of putting the flint on the knife, say "With time somewhat of the essence, you can take all this step-by-step rigmarole as read, and jump straight to lighting whatever it is you'd like to burn." Understand the command "strike" as something new. Understand "strike [a carried thing] on/against/with [a carried thing]" as striking it against. Understand "rub [a carried thing] on/against/with [a carried thing]" as striking it against. Understand "hit [a carried thing] on/against/with [a carried thing]" as striking it against. Striking it against is an action applying to two objects. Check striking it against: If the noun is not the flint and the second noun is not the flint, say "That might provide a moment's diversion but is unlikely to be especially productive." instead; If the noun is the flint and the second noun is the knife, continue the action; If the noun is the knife and the second noun is the flint, continue the action; Say "Much like all the times your Great-Aunt has attempted to set you up with one of her friends' unwed relations, that course of action seems unlikely to produce any sparks." instead. Carry out striking it against: Say "With time somewhat of the essence, you can take all this step-by-step rigmarole as read, and jump straight to lighting whatever it is you'd like to burn." Understand the command "light" as something new. Understand "light [something]" as lighting. Understand "start fire in/on [something]" as lighting. Lighting is an action applying to one object. Understand "light [something] with flint/torch" as lighting. Understand "burn [something]" as lighting. Understand "burn [something] with flint/torch" as lighting. Understand "set [something] on fire" as lighting. Instead of smoking the wood stack with something, try lighting the noun. Instead of burning something, try lighting the noun. Check lighting: If the noun is afire, say "You're nearly certain that's already on fire." instead; If the player carries the heavily-smoking torch, continue the action; If the player carries the flint and the player carries the knife, continue the action; If the player carries the flint and the player does not carry the knife, say "You've got some flint, but steel is a non-optional add-on to this process." instead; If the player carries the knife and the player does not carry the flint, say "You've got some steel, but flint is a non-optional add-on to this process." instead; If the player does not carry the knife and the player does not carry the flint and the player does not carry the heavily-smoking torch, say "That's a nice idea, but you'll need something more than the blazing force of your personality to start a fire." instead. Carry out lighting: If the noun is a person, say "Violence is against the code, old man." instead; If the noun is the wood stack: Say "You start a cheery fire in the fireplace."; Now the wood stack is afire; If there is an unmentionable in the fireplace: Increment hidden count; Stop the action; If the noun is the torch, say "You're nearly certain that that's already on fire." instead; If the noun is the oil lamps, say "You're nearly certain that that's already on fire." instead; Say "[if finale is happening]Given the madness, setting haphazard fires might not make the situation substantially worse, but it's hard to see them making things any better, either[otherwise]You've found that polite society tends to frown on haphazard firebuggery[end if]." [Burning is I think already a built-in action, so once again, I'm not sure what I was thinking here] Instead of questioning Puffy about the knife while the player is in the bedroom and Puffy carries the knife, try taking the knife. Instead of inserting something into the fireplace, say "You wouldn't want that to get burned!" Instead of inserting the torch into the fireplace, try lighting the wood stack. Instead of inserting an unmentionable into the fireplace: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the wood stack is afire: Say "It's too hot to be fussing with the fire now."; Stop the action; If the fireplace is hermed: Say "The stack is already teetering -- you don't think it can take another unmentionable without toppling."; If the fireplace is unhermed: Say "You slide an unmentionable into the stack of firewood -- it teeters for a moment, but stays in place. Nonetheless, since the wood is quite charred and the pale stone is unblemished, you might say the unmentionable is in the stack but not of it."; Now a random unmentionable carried by the player is inside the fireplace; Now the fireplace is hermed. Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the fireplace: If the player does not carry an inkdingle: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the wood stack is afire: Say "It's too hot to be fussing with the fire now."; Stop the action; If the fireplace is hermed: Say "The stack is already teetering -- you don't think it can take another unmentionable without toppling."; If the fireplace is unhermed: Say "You slide an inked unmentionable into the stack of firewood -- it teeters for a moment, but stays in place."; Now a random inkdingle carried by the player is inside the fireplace; Now the fireplace is hermed; Increment hidden count. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is in the fireplace: If the wood stack is afire: Say "It's too hot to be fussing with the fire now."; Stop the action; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Now fireplace is unhermed. Instead of taking an inkdingle (called the foo) while the foo is in the fireplace: If the wood stack is afire: Say "It's too hot to be fussing with the fire now."; Stop the action; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Now the fireplace is unhermed; Decrement hidden count. Understand "wood/-- stack" as the fireplace when the fireplace is hermed. Understand "wood stack/--" as the fireplace when the fireplace is hermed. The frame bed is in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "You went all-out on your bed, from the gilded frame to the nice, plump mattress. Now that you think of it, you've woken up with a backache these last few mornings -- though that's the least of your problems at the moment." Understand "sleep in/on bed/mattress" as sleeping while the player is in the bedroom. The mattress is part of the frame bed. It is an opaque container. The description is "Your downy mattress has been feeling a bit lumpy of late[if the Trojan Horse replica is not nowhere]. At least that mystery's been solved[end if][if the mattress is hermed and the Trojan Horse is not in the mattress], though you've re-lumped it by slipping an unmentionable in[end if][if the mattress is hermed and the Trojan Horse is in the mattress], though it's even more lumpy now with both the horse and an unmentionable in[end if][if the mattress is unhermed and the Trojan Horse is in the mattress], with the replica horse lying pertly under the mattress[end if].". Understand "lump/lump" as the mattress. Instead of taking the mattress, say "You consider flopping the mattress out the window to provide a cushion for a spot of self-defensestration, but it's sadly too big to fit." Understand "throw [mattress] out/through/to/into of/-- [window]" as throwing it over. Instead of throwing the mattress over the window, try taking the mattress. Understand "look under [mattress]" as searching. Understand "look under [frame bed]" as searching. Instead of searching the frame bed, try searching the mattress. Instead of rubbing the bed, try searching the mattress. Instead of rubbing the mattress, try searching the mattress. Instead of touching the bed, try searching the mattress. Instead of touching the mattress, try searching the mattress. Instead of opening the mattress, try searching the mattress. Instead of inserting something into the frame bed, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of searching the mattress: If the Trojan Horse replica is nowhere: Say "Oh, hello! Now you see why your nightly dormition has been rather more ache-inducing of late -- somehow your scale model of the Trojan Horse wound up under your mattress."; Now the Trojan Horse replica is in the mattress; Stop the action; If the mattress is hermed: Say "You discover an unmentionable! Of course, that's not terribly surprising inasmuch as you hid it there."; If the mattress is unhermed and the Trojan Horse replica is not nowhere: Say "You give the mattress another search, on the off chance that something other than the large wooden horse was responsible for giving you the backache (as it eventuates, it was in fact the horse)." The examine containers rule does nothing when examining the mattress. The examine containers rule does nothing when examining the Trojan Horse replica. The examine containers rule does nothing when examining the pile of chitons. Understand "put [something] behind [something]" as inserting it into when the second noun is the bedroom door. Understand "hide [something] behind [something]" as inserting it into when the second noun is the bedroom door. Instead of inserting something into the bed, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of reverse-smoking something with the bed, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of reverse-smoking something with the mattress, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of inserting an unmentionable into the mattress: If the player does not carry an unmentionable: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the mattress is hermed: Say "You're willing to make some sacrifices, but a second unmentionable would compromise your night-time comfort too thoroughly to contemplate."; If the mattress is unhermed and the trojan horse replica is nowhere: Move a random unmentionable carried by the player to the mattress; Say "You cram an unmentionable under your mattress. While you're rooting around down there, you realize why your nightly dormition has been rather more ache-inducing of late -- somehow your scale model of the Trojan Horse wound up here!"; Increment hidden count; Now the mattress is hermed; Now the trojan horse replica is in the mattress; Stop the action; If the mattress is unhermed and the trojan horse replica is not nowhere: Move a random unmentionable carried by the player to the mattress; Say "You cram an unmentionable under your mattress."; Increment hidden count; Now the mattress is hermed. Instead of removing an unmentionable (called the foo) from the mattress, try taking the foo. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is inside the mattress: Now the mattress is unhermed; Now the player carries the foo; Say "You take the unmentionable back out from under your mattress -- whatever they'll do to you can't be as bad as a lumpy bed."; Decrement hidden count. Instead of inserting an inkdingle into the mattress, say "You have to draw the line somewhere, and smearing ink all over your bedclothes is well past the said line." Instead of inserting something into the mattress, say "You've had enough unrestful nights as it is -- haphazardly putting things under the mattress with no rhyme or reason isn't quite the thing." The Trojan Horse replica is an opaque open container. It is nowhere. The description is "Your man disapproves of this sort of knick-knackery, but this model horse inspires you as you contemplate the valor of Hector and the wiles of Odysseus. Plus it has little wheels so you can push it around while neighing like a race-horse, which is quite the wheeze. [if the Trojan Horse replica is inked]All the ink you've spattered on it has made the horse rather a piebald. [end if][if the Trojan Horse replica is hermed]An unmentionable is doing its best impression of an Achaean warrior, lurking undetectably inside the horse.[end if]". Understand "model/wheels/cavity/horsey" as the Trojan Horse replica. The Trojan Horse replica is unknown. Instead of entering the Trojan Horse replica, say "Sadly, you're about a hundred times to big to fit inside, though it would be a lovely place to ride out this whole to-do." Instead of opening the Trojan Horse replica, say "Now that you check, there does seem to be a hidden cavity accessible via the horse's undercarriage. How authentic!" Instead of inserting something into the Trojan Horse replica, say "It's a rather small cavity at a decidedly awkward angle -- anything you put in is unlikely to come out easily." Instead of removing something from the Trojan Horse replica, say "Finagling the unmentionable out of the narrow, tiny cavity would require the fingers of a thief and the patience of a philosopher, neither of whom are currently close to hand." Instead of pushing the Trojan Horse replica, say "It is a good spot of fun, but perhaps that can wait until later." Rule for printing the name of the Trojan Horse Replica: Say "[printed name]"; omit contents in listing. Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the Trojan Horse replica: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the Trojan Horse Replica is hermed: Say "The horse is full up at present."; Stop the action; If the Trojan Horse replica is unhermed: Now the foo is inside the Trojan Horse replica; Now the Trojan Horse replica is hermed; If the Trojan Horse replica is on the shelf or the Trojan Horse replica is on the writing desk: Increment hidden count; Say "Yours is a struggle worthy of Homer's tongue -- perhaps it could be slotted into the Iliad in place of some of the sulking? -- but eventually you are able to cram the unmentionable inside the replica." Instead of inserting an inkdingle (called the foo) into the Trojan Horse replica: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the Trojan Horse Replica is hermed: Say "The horse is full up at present."; Stop the action; If the Trojan Horse replica is unhermed: Now the foo is inside the Trojan Horse replica; Now the Trojan Horse replica is hermed; Now the Trojan Horse replica is inked; Say "Yours is a struggle worthy of Homer's tongue -- perhaps it could be slotted into the Iliad in place of some of the sulking? -- but eventually you are able to cram the unmentionable inside the replica." The shelf is a supporter in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "This shelf came with the room, and doesn't get much use. [if there is nothing on the shelf]It's currently quite bare.[end if][if the Trojan Horse replica is on the shelf]You've placed your replica of the Trojan Horse on it, making a nice little display.[end if]". Instead of putting an unmentionable on the shelf, say "Leaving an unmentionable lying around in the open seems rather the opposite of concealing it, and while there can be a pleasant frisson from contradicting what's expected, you're less enthusiastic about the kind of contradiction that gets you hauled into the law-courts." Instead of putting an inkdingle on the shelf, say "Leaving an unmentionable lying around in the open seems rather the opposite of concealing it, and while there can be a pleasant frisson from contradicting what's expected, you're less enthusiastic about the kind of contradiction that gets you hauled into the law-courts." Before putting something on the shelf: If the noun is the Trojan Horse replica or the noun is the pan pipes or the noun is an unmentionable or the noun is an inkdingle: continue the action; Otherwise: Say "Fine-tuning your interior d[unicode 233]cor can wait."; Stop the action. After putting the Trojan Horse replica on the shelf: Say "You put the Trojan Horse replica down on the shelf, making a nice little display."; If the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and an unmentionable is inside the Trojan Horse replica: Increment hidden count. Instead of taking the Trojan Horse replica when the Trojan Horse replica is on the shelf: Say "Taken."; Now the player carries the Trojan Horse replica; If the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and an unmentionable is inside the Trojan Horse replica: Decrement hidden count. After putting the Trojan Horse replica on the writing desk: Say "You put the Trojan Horse replica down on the desk, making a nice little display."; If the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and an unmentionable is inside the Trojan Horse replica: Increment hidden count. Instead of taking the Trojan Horse replica when the Trojan Horse replica is on the writing desk: Say "Taken."; Now the player carries the Trojan Horse replica; If the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and an unmentionable is inside the Trojan Horse replica: Decrement hidden count. The bedroom door is a door. It is west of the bedroom. It is undescribed. It is open. The description is "Alky, Puffy, and Machon are doing their best to keep the door closed under the blows of the magistrate and his flunkies, but it's clearly a losing battle. Beyond the current excitement, there's not much to say about it other than that it opens to the right -- you had to move your writing desk to the other side because you kept knocking your inkwell over when throwing the door open. [if behind-the-door is hermed]You've secreted an unmentionable away behind it.[end if]". Understand "put [something] behind the/-- [bedroom door]" as hiding it to. Understand "hide [something] behind the/-- [bedroom door]" as hiding it to. Understand "stairs" as the bedroom door while the player is in the bedroom. Instead of hiding something to the bedroom door, try inserting the noun into the bedroom door. Instead of hiding an unmentionable to the well-tailored chiton, say "You'll try as best you can if you're still carrying any when the magistrate gets in, but you don't like your chances.". Instead of inserting an unmentionable into the well-tailored chiton, say "You'll try as best you can if you're still carrying any when the magistrate gets in, but you don't like your chances.". The can't remove what's not inside rule does nothing when the second noun is the bedroom door. Instead of inserting something into the bedroom door, try inserting the noun into the behind-the-door. Understand "take [something] from behind/-- [bedroom door]" as removing it from. Understand "take [something] from behind door" as taking. Understand "get [something] from behind/-- [bedroom door]" as removing it from. Understand "get [something] from behind door" as taking. Understand "remove [something] from behind/-- [bedroom door]" as removing it from. Understand "remove [something] from behind door" as taking. Instead of putting something on the behind-the-door, try inserting the noun into the behind-the-door. Hiding it to is an action applying to two things. Understand "hide [something] behind the/-- [something]" as hiding it to. Understand "put [something] behind the/-- [something]" as hiding it to. Check hiding it to: If the second noun is not the chest, say "The [noun] must offer some better opportunities for concealment." instead. Instead of hiding something to the chest, say "That would make the chest stick out from the wall in a fairly obvious way." Instead of hiding something to the bed, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of hiding something to the mattress, try inserting the noun into the mattress. Instead of hiding something to the writing desk, say "The desk doesn't have a back, so that would be quite obtrusive." Instead of hiding something to the writing desk, say "Your desk is an elegant little number, but doesn't boast a back or anything else that would make it an especially convincing hiding place." The can't go through undescribed doors rule does nothing. Instead of going west from the bedroom: Say "There's currently a makeshift barricade obstructing your door, but if you did want to speed things along, you suppose you could dislodge it. Do you want to make this whole nightmare end that much sooner?"; If the player consents: Say "[line break]You remove the chair, making the barricade rather more of a notional concern."; Now the magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom; Otherwise: Say "[line break]No, indeed, best not." Instead of opening the door: Say "There's currently a makeshift barricade obstructing your door, but if you did want to speed things along, you suppose you could dislodge it. Do you want to make this whole nightmare end that much sooner?"; If the player consents: Say "[line break]You remove the chair, making the barricade rather more of a notional concern."; Now the magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom; Otherwise: Say "[line break]No, indeed, best not." Understand "prepare self/myself/-- for justice" as ending-hastening. Ending-hastening is an action applying to nothing. Carry out ending-hastening: Say "You take a deep breath, wondering whether all these antic struggles are a mere distractions from the fundamental principles of life, like those philosopher coves say. Do you want to take your last moments before the magistrate arrives seeing to your soul?"; If the player consents: Say "[line break]Turns out seeing to one's soul is rather hard and perhaps takes a bit of practice, but in any event you pass the next few minutes agreeably enough."; Now the magistrate-daemon is in the bedroom; Otherwise: Say "[line break]No, indeed, best not." Behind-the-door is an opaque container in the bedroom. It is scenery. The description is "There's a patch of wall that will be right behind the door when it opens. [if the behind-the-door is hermed]You've put an unmentionable there, lying just so.[end if]". The examine containers rule does nothing when examining the behind-the-door. Understand "wall/walls/patch" as the behind-the-door. Understand "behind the/-- door" as behind-the-door. [Oh, the behind-the-door! Another awkward kludge, thankfully one of the last] Instead of inserting something into behind-the-door, say "Of all the places where you could put [the noun], you're not sure why it would need to go there specifically." Instead of inserting an unmentionable (called the foo) into the behind-the-door: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the behind-the-door is hermed: Say "You don't think you can get more than one to fit, at least not without risking them making an awful clatter when the door opens."; Stop the action; If the behind-the-door is unhermed: Now the foo is inside the behind-the-door; Now the behind-the-door is hermed; Increment hidden count; Say "You carefully place an unmentionable in the spot right behind where the door will open -- with any luck they'll never notice what they never noticed!" Instead of inserting an inkdingle (called the foo) into the behind-the-door: If the player does not carry the foo: Say "You need to be holding one to do that!"; Stop the action; If the behind-the-door is hermed: Say "You don't think you can get more than one to fit, at least not without risking them making an awful clatter when the door opens."; Stop the action; If the behind-the-door is unhermed: Now the foo is inside the behind-the-door; Now the behind-the-door is hermed; Increment hidden count; Say "You carefully place an unmentionable in the spot right behind where the door will open -- with any luck they'll never notice what the never noticed!" [Oops, a typo here -- "the" for "they". I probably made the error, copy and pasted it, then only fixed it in the regular unmentionable version when a beta tester found the issue] Check removing something from the bedroom door: If the behind-the-door is hermed: Say "You've got the unmentionable set in just the perfect spot -- better leave it be."; Stop the action. Check removing something from the behind-the-door: If the behind-the-door is hermed: Say "You've got the unmentionable set in just the perfect spot -- better leave it be."; Stop the action. Check taking something (called the foo) when the foo is inside the behind-the-door: If the behind-the-door is hermed: Say "You've got the unmentionable set in just the perfect spot -- better leave it be."; Stop the action. [Instead of removing something (called the foo) from behind-the-door: Now the behind-the-door is unhermed; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Decrement hidden count. Instead of taking an unmentionable (called the foo) when the foo is inside the behind-the-door: Now the behind-the-door is unhermed; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Decrement hidden count. Instead of taking an inkdingle (called the foo) when the foo is inside the behind-the-door: Now the behind-the-door is unhermed; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Decrement hidden count. Instead of removing something from the bedroom door: If an unmentionable (called the foo) is inside the behind-the-door: Now the behind-the-door is unhermed; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Decrement hidden count; If an inkdingle (called the foo) is inside the behind-the-door: Now the behind-the-door is unhermed; Say "Taken."; Move the foo to the player; Decrement hidden count; Otherwise: Say "You can't see any such thing."] [All of this is commented out since taking and removing unmentionables from behind the door wound up being very cursed -- I'd try to do that, and the right say statement would fire but I'd wind up with an unmentionable I'd given to Alky being the one that moved into the player's inventory, with the hermed property and hidden count bouncing around chaotically. I don't fully understand why that was happening, and I think the implementation is still a little buggy, but it mostly works now?] Instead of asking Machon about "unmentionables" while the player is in the bedroom: If Machon carries an unmentionable (called the foo), try questioning Machon about the foo instead; Say "'Oh, they're rather nice,' Machon says, somewhat distracted by circumstances." Instead of questioning Machon about an unmentionable while the player is in the bedroom: If Machon carries an unmentionable (called the foo): If Machon is broken: Say "You take back the unmentionable you'd entrusted to Machon."; If Machon is unbroken: Say "'Oh, say, I do have another one,' Machon says. 'Did I forget to give it to you?' He hands it over."; Now Machon is broken; Move the foo to the player; Otherwise: Say "'Oh, they're rather nice,' Machon says, somewhat distracted by circumstances." Understand the command "brace" as something new. Bracing it to is an action applying to two things. Understand "brace [something] to/against [door]" as bracing it to. Understand "push [something] to/against [door]" as bracing it to while the player is in the bedroom. Instead of bracing something to the bedroom door, say "You've picked your possessions and furnishings for aesthetics, not raw mass, and besides there's barely room to get in edgewise what with your three chums doing their utmost to brace the door with their bodies." Instead of taking or pushing or pulling the desk, try bracing the desk to the bedroom door. Instead of taking or pushing or pulling the bed, try bracing the bed to the bedroom door. Instead of taking or pushing or pulling the mattress, try bracing the mattress to the bedroom door. Understand "help [something]" as aiding. Understand "aid [something]" as aiding. Aiding is an action applying to one thing. After aiding Puffy, say "There's barely room to get in edgewise what with your three chums doing their utmost to brace the door with their bodies." After of aiding Alky, say "There's barely room to get in edgewise what with your three chums doing their utmost to brace the door with their bodies." After aiding Machon, say "There's barely room to get in edgewise what with your three chums doing their utmost to brace the door with their bodies." Check aiding: If the player is not in the bedroom, say "A laudable goal, but more specificity would help matters." instead; If the noun is not a person, say "You're always glad to lend a fellow a hand, but [the noun] doesn't seem like it would know what to do with one." instead. Instead of questioning Alky about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of asking Alky about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!"Instead of questioning Machon about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of asking Machon about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of questioning Puffy about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of asking Puffy about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of telling Puffy about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of telling Alky about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Instead of telling Machon about something while the player is in the bedroom, say "This doesn't seem like the time for idle chit-chat!" Chapter 6 - Endings [OK, deep breath] When Finale ends: Say "With a final great heave, your door is hurled open, sending the lads flying[if an unmentionable is in the behind-the-door or an inkdingle is in behind-the-door] and entirely hiding the unmentionable you put against the wall[otherwise] and leaving quite a dent on the wall where it comes to rest -- good thing you don't typically keep anything back there[end if]. The first cove through has a gimlet eye and an impressive nose, so you take him for the magistrate. He in turn appears to take you as the ringleader[if ridiculous count is greater than 2.9] despite your ridiculous costume[end if], inasmuch as you weren't getting your hands dirty trying to hold the door. 'What's the meaning of this, eh?' he asks, poking a meaty forefinger against your lapel. 'When we say open up, a good Athenian opens up!'[line break][line break]'Er, sorry old man,' you stammer out, 'I'm a bit hard of hearing?' He harrumphs, and signals his men to search you and the others.[line break][line break]"; Say "[If the player carries an unmentionable and the player does not carry an inkdingle]The fellow patting you down crows in triumph and pulls an unmentionable out of your chiton. 'That's evidence, that is!' he calls to the magistrate, who gives a satisfied nod[end if][if the player carries an inkdingle]The fellow patting you down crows in triumph and pulls an unmentionable out of your chiton, though he seems much less triumphant when he sees the ink smeared all over his fingers. 'Dunno what this deviant was doing getting it all messy-like, but that's evidence, that is!' he calls to the magistrate, who gives a satisfied nod[end if][if the player does not carry an unmentionable and the player does not carry an inkdingle]The fellow patting you down has high hopes as he pulls out each of your possessions, but is crestfallen when he sees that though you do carry around a rather odd allotment of items, none of them are precisely contraband[end if].[line break][line break]"; If the player carries the Trojan Horse replica and the Trojan Horse replica is hermed, say "The magistrate takes an interest in your Trojan Horse replica, which admittedly does seem rather out of place[if the Trojan Horse replica is inked] besides being smeared all over with ink[end if]. 'A curious object to carry on your person, no? The Trojan Horse -- I wonder...' Suddenly, he smashes it to the floor, and roots through the debris with his sandal until he finds the unmentionable. 'You're a cunning one, aren't you?' he says with grudging respect. 'But not as cunning as I!' (You could point out that he meant 'me,' but that probably wouldn't help).[line break][line break]"; If the player carries the pan pipes and the pan pipes are hermed, say "The fellow searching you proffers your pan pipes to the magistrate. The unmentionable blends in reasonably well, but the ruse quickly crumbles under this focused inspection. 'This is blasphemous,' the magistrate thunders. 'And also very strange,' he adds in a more bemused tone.[line break][line break]"; Say "Puffy squirms under the attentions of his fellow[if Puffy carries an unmentionable], then looks down with a hangdog expression when the unmentionable is revealed[end if][if Puffy does not carry an unmentionable], who grows frustrated not to have found anything[end if].[line break][line break]"; Say "Machon says 'no need to be physical, chaps, here's all I've got,' and turns out his pockets. [if Machon carries an unmentionable]He seems as surprised as the magistrate to discover an unmentionable there in among the lint[end if][if Machon does not carry an unmentionable]Beyond some lint and a few olives he was saving for later, there's not much of interest[end if].[line break][line break]"; Say "The last henchman runs his hands up and down Alky, who starts breathing heavily and making faces. 'Don't stop,' he sighs, dancing his tongue over his lips, and the unnerved fellow makes the search rather cursory[if Alky carries an unmentionable]. Alky throws you a small wink, then covers it with a cough[end if].[line break][line break]"; Say "'Right, now let's see if they've hidden aught about the place,' the magistrate calls. He couldn't be looking over your digs any more coldly were he a Great-Aunt.[line break][line break]"; Pause the game; If an unmentionable (called the foo) is in the bedroom and the foo is not in a container and the foo is not on a supporter, say "One of the lackeys stoops and picks up an unmentionable from the floor. 'Didn't even try to [']ide it, like,' he says wonderingly.[line break][line break]"; If an inkdingle (called the foo) is in the bedroom and the foo is not in a container and the foo is not on a supporter, say "'And what's this then?' muses the magistrate, as he peers down at an ink-bespotted unmentionable lying on the floor. 'Care to explain exactly what you were up to here?' You open your mouth to respond, but you have to admit, that's a tough one, and have recourse to a silent smirk for lack of any other plausible response.[line break][line break]"; If the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and the Trojan Horse replica is not carried by the player and the Trojan Horse replica is not on the shelf and the Trojan horse is not on the writing desk, say "The magistrate notices your Trojan Horse replica, which admittedly does seem rather out of place[if the Trojan Horse replica is inked] besides being smeared all over with ink[end if]. 'A curious object to simply leave lying around, no? The Trojan Horse -- I wonder...' Suddenly, he smashes it to the floor, and roots through the debris with his sandal until he finds the unmentionable. 'You're a cunning one, aren't you?' he says with grudging respect. 'But not as cunning as I!' (You could point out that he meant 'me,' but that probably wouldn't help).[line break][line break]"; If the pan pipes are hermed and the pan pipes are not carried by the player and the pan pipes are not on the shelf and the pan pipes are not on the writing desk, say "A henchman picks up your pan pipes and proffers them to the magistrate'. The unmentionable blends in reasonably well, but the ruse quickly crumbles under this focused inspection. 'This is blasphemous,' the magistrate thunders. 'And also very strange,' he adds in a more bemused tone.[line break][line break]"; Say "The chest is an obvious place to look[if the chest is closed], and the magistrate throws it open with a wolfish smirk[end if]. [if the chest is unhermed and the pile of chitons is unhermed]He's disappointed to find only your clothing -- honestly, you're often disappointed by your wardrobe as well, it's really past time to get some fancier things. [end if][If the chest is hermed]He rubs his palms together with glee, then chucks out an unmentionable -- in retrospect, this wasn't the best hiding place you could have chosen. [end if][if the pile of chitons is hermed and the pile of chitons is uninked and the chest is closed]Fortunately, he doesn't dig deep into your clothing, so he overlooks the unmentionable you've hidden there. [end if][if the pile of chitons is hermed and the pile of chitons is inked]The spatters of ink all over your clothes make him suspicious, and after rooting around in them he recovers an unmentionable -- at least now his clothing is all messy too, which is something like a moral victory. [end if][if the pile of chitons is hermed and the pile of chitons is uninked and the chest is open]His suspicions aroused by the way you left the chest yawning open, the magistrate roots around in your clothes, wrinkling them terribly and, what's worse, recovering an unmentionable. [end if][line break][line break]"; Say "One of the magistrate's men walks over to the fireplace[if the wood stack is afire], warming his hands appreciatively over the crackling fire[end if][if the fireplace is unhermed], then moves on[end if]. [if the fireplace is unhermed][line break][end if][if the fireplace is hermed]You tense as his eyes wander towards where you hid an unmentionable, [end if][if an inkdingle is in the fireplace]but since you blackened it with ink, it blends right in with the charred wood.[end if][if an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is afire]but he doesn't notice it among the wood what with all the ash and smoke.[end if][if an unmentionable is in the fireplace and the wood stack is unafire]and sure enough he notices the white stone crammed in amidst the charred wood. 'Well well well,' the magistrate says as he takes the unmentionable from his flunkey. You swallow a gulp.[end if][line break]"; If the Trojan Horse replica is on the shelf and the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and the Trojan Horse replica is uninked, say "The shelf is just the place for a knick-knack like the replica, so the magistrate doesn't give it a second look -- this must be how Odysseus felt when his wheeze snookered the Trojans![line break][line break]"; If the Trojan Horse replica is on the shelf and the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and the Trojan Horse replica is inked, say "The shelf is just the place for a knick-knack like the replica, so the magistrate wouldn't give it a second look, except that it's all spattered with ink so he does. 'The Trojan Horse -- I wonder...' Suddenly, he smashes it to the floor, and roots through the debris with his sandal until he finds the unmentionable. 'You're a cunning one, aren't you?' he says with grudging respect. 'But not as cunning as I!' (You could point out that he meant 'me,' but that probably wouldn't help).[line break][line break]"; If the pan pipes are on the shelf and the pan pipes are hermed and the pan pipes are uninked, say "The pan pipes lie unobtrusively on your shelf, drawing no scrutiny to themselves whatsoever as the magistrate finishes scanning the shelf.[line break][line break]"; If the pan pipes are on the shelf and the pan pipes are hermed and the pan pipes are inked, say "The pan pipes lie on your shelf, but the ink-spatter on them is rather obtrusive, so the magistrate plucks them up for a closer look. The unmentionable blends in reasonably well, but the ruse quickly crumbles under this focused inspection. 'This is blasphemous,' the magistrate thunders. 'And also very strange,' he adds in a more bemused tone.[line break][line break]"; If the mattress is hermed, say "A fellow takes a quick gander under your bed, but helpfully draws the line at exploring your bedclothes, thereby leaving one more unmentionable undetected.[line break][line break]"; Say "The magistrate turns to examine the writing things on your desk"; If the desk is unhermed, say ", but quickly loses interest.[line break][line break]"; If the desk is hermed: If an unmentionable is on the desk, say " and immediately picks up the unmentionable you'd left there. 'An odd sort of stylus that has no ink on it, no?' He waggles a censorious eyebrow at you. For some reason you get the feeling that he's rather insufferable at dinner-parties.[line break][line break]"; If an inkdingle is on the desk and the paper is not on the desk, say ", his eyes narrowing as he sees the inked unmentionable. After a moment he barks a short laugh. 'Oh, it looks very like a stylus, I admit -- but where is the paper?' He waggles a censorious eyebrow at you. For some reason you get the feeling that he's rather insufferable at dinner-parties.[line break][line break]"; If an inkdingle is on the desk and the paper is on the desk and the paper is uninked, say ", his eyes narrowing as he sees the inked unmentionable. After a moment he barks a short laugh. 'Oh, it looks very like a stylus, I admit -- but why is it inked if you haven't written anything on the paper?' He waggles a censorious eyebrow at you. For some reason you get the feeling that he's rather insufferable at dinner-parties.[line break][line break]"; If an inkdingle is on the desk and the paper is on the desk and the paper is inked and the stylus is on the desk, say " -- 'who writes with two styluses?' he mutters, as if to himself, then chortles aloud (he's laying it on a bit thick, really). 'Oh, well done, you almost fooled me.' He bares his teeth. 'Almost.'[line break][line break]"; If an inkdingle is on the desk and the paper is on the desk and the paper is inked and the stylus is not on the desk, say "-- he snatches up the paper, overlooking the unmentionable you'd inked to make it look like a stylus. 'This rummy magistrate can soak his head,' he slowly reads aloud, then reddens. 'A curious thing to choose as your epitaph!'[line break][line break]"; If the Trojan Horse replica is on the desk and the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and the Trojan Horse replica is uninked, say "The desk is just the place for a knick-knack like the replica, so the magistrate doesn't give it a second look -- this must be how Odysseus felt when his wheeze snookered the Trojans![line break][line break]"; If the Trojan Horse replica is on the desk and the Trojan Horse replica is hermed and the Trojan Horse replica is inked, say "The desk is just the place for a knick-knack like the replica, so the magistrate wouldn't give it a second look, except that it's all spattered with ink so he does. 'The Trojan Horse -- I wonder...' Suddenly, he smashes it to the floor, and roots through the debris with his sandal until he finds the unmentionable. 'You're a cunning one, aren't you?' he says with grudging respect. 'But not as cunning as I!' (You could point out that he meant 'me,' but that probably wouldn't help).[line break][line break]"; If the pan pipes are on the writing desk and the pan pipes are hermed and the pan pipes are uninked, say "The pan pipes lie unobtrusively on your desk, drawing no scrutiny to themselves whatsoever as the magistrate finishes his scan of the area.[line break][line break]"; If the pan pipes are on the writing desk and the pan pipes are hermed and the pan pipes are inked, say "The pan pipes lie on your desk, but the ink-spatter on them is rather obtrusive, so the magistrate plucks them up for a closer look. The unmentionable blends in reasonably well, but the ruse quickly crumbles under this focused inspection. 'This is blasphemous,' the magistrate thunders. 'And also very strange,' he adds in a more bemused tone.[line break][line break]"; Say "His inspection complete, the magistrate wheels around at you. [if the window found count is not 0]'And one last thing -- was it just a coincidence that remnants of a herm were found just below your window?' he snaps, 'I think not.' [end if]He opens his mouth to pronounce his verdict...[line break][line break]"; Pause the game; If hidden count is 9: Say "'I may owe you an apology,' the magistrate says, with the begrudging tone you use when your Great-Aunt asks you to squire her around the metrop. 'It appears you were not responsible, but whoever desecrated the herms will pay, I promise you that.'[line break][line break]You hold your breath until he and his goons are out of earshot, then each exhale in a crescendoing sequence. 'Well, that was a close-run thing,' Alky says. 'But what nerve -- what bravura improvisation! I would never have thought it, but it's as if you have ten brains squeezed in where you'd think you couldn't fit in even one!' You happily absorb the (somewhat-backhanded, now that you think on it) adulation of the multitude, until Puffy, that spoilsport, emits a discreet cough.[line break][line break]'And yet, Alky, if I'm not mistaken,' the droopy cove commences, 'you still need to head to Sicily to lead our expedition against the Peloponnesian League, except now that you've been cleared of involvement in the desecration of the herms, you won't be recalled, defect to Sparta to avoid punishment, serve them as a key advisor before falling out with them as well, defecting once more to the Persians, before being recalled back to Athens...'[line break][line break]'Hang on, is that what happens?' Machon asks. 'It's quite confusing!'[line break][line break]'Well, so it is with history,' Alky says. 'But Puffy, shouldn't you be putting some fancy-dress on this, saying the Goddess revealed the future to you or some rot like that?'[line break][line break]Puffy snorts in a manner that feels decidedly aimed at you. 'Oh, please, like you think this addle-pate just happened to deduce how to conceal nine of those things first time? With all the rewinding and undoing he's been doing, causality's rather gone out the window.'[line break][line break]'Yes, I suppose you're right,' Alky says with a sigh. 'What to do, what to do...'"; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "You try to fight down a feeling of resentment as you give another hard pull to your oar -- who's to say that Thucydides chap got it right about how all this happened? Yet due to the present author's misguided fealty to musty old books, you're stuck back in a jam instead of getting off scot-free like you deserve. Still, by now you know your line: you turn to your benchmate. 'Say, Puffy,' you ask, 'what, when you get right down to it, were those old mysteries about? They got a bit lost in the shuffle.'[line break][line break]Puffy heaves a sigh -- not for the first time. 'They're a ritual re-enactment of Persephone's abduction and rescue, symbolizing the regeneration and ultimate ascent of the soul.'[line break][line break]'Oh,' you say. 'Sort of like an eternal recurrence?'[line break][line break]'Well, that's more of a cosmic framing of the question,' Puffy says. 'But close enough, so long as you're comfortable abstracting from what was a ritual focused on the survival of the individual to a global, if not ontological, context.'[line break][line break]'It's a plausible connection to draw!' you protest -- then start to giggle: 'Wait a tic -- none of this is really happening, is it?'[line break][line break]Puffy cracks a rare smile. 'No. That truly was exceptionally powerful kykeon.'"; End the story finally saying "That went about as well as you could expect!"; If hidden count is greater than 4.9 and hidden count is less than 9: Say "'The sacred herms have been desecrated, and you are the ones responsible! Oh, you'll be paying for this for a long time,' the magistrate snarls. But he's brought short by a polite cough from one of his men.[line break][line break]'Beggin['] yer pardon,' he says, 'but there was a lot of herms broke, more than a dozen by my reckoning. This lot only had a few.'[line break][line break]The magistrate revolves this in his noodle, but Alky jumps in before he comes to any firm conclusion: 'we saw a few smashed herms on our way back from a drinking party, and these were the only ones we found, you see.'[line break][line break]'Yes,' Puffy adds, seeing Alky's gist, 'we wanted to return them to the proper authorities, but were worried you might get the wrong idea.'[line break][line break]'Hmm,' the magistrate says, pursing his lips. 'That's a nice story. Let's see how it holds up, what? None of you lot leave Athens while we sort this out.' With a closing harrumph, he leads his men out of your digs.[line break][line break]The four of you look at each other in silence until you're quite sure they're beyond earshot. 'When he discovers,' ventures Machon, 'that that drinking party was in Eleusis, and all of the smashed herms happen to be in a straight line between there and here...'[line break][line break]'We won't want to be anywhere in the vicinity,' Alky finishes the thought. 'Well, despite that closing admonition, I see a lot of reason to find more hospitable climes -- and we should have time to liquidate some assets to make things more comfortable while we're away from home. I'd been planning a trip to Sicily -- you lot want to come with?'[line break][line break]"; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "Three months later, the bloom is rather off the rose when it comes to this Sicilian vacation -- turns it was more of a bally expedition, with Alky notionally in charge though his second in command, sensing there was something untoward about what happened to the herms, keeps staring daggers at his backside. While he's off doing his spot of generalship, you, Puffy, and Machon have been cooling your heels in Catania, about which the nicest thing you can say is that it's just downslope of Mount Etna.[line break][line break]One day, as you're doing a spot of fishing to try to suppress the monotony, a thought occurs. You turn to your companion: 'Say, Puffy,' you ask, 'what, when you get right down to it, were those old mysteries about? They got a bit lost in the shuffle.'[line break][line break]Puffy heaves a sigh -- he's not been getting many bites today. 'They're a ritual re-enactment of Persephone's abduction and rescue, symbolizing the regeneration and ultimate ascent of the soul.'[line break][line break]'Oh,' you say.[line break][line break]'I mean it's not very good when you just say it like that,' Puffy admits.[line break][line break]'No, of course.'[line break][line break]'And Alky probably built it up for you, nothing can ever live up to high expectations.' You smile at him in commiseration. 'Plus the kykeon -- the kykeon really helps it all land.'[line break][line break]'Shame it didn't quite come together,' you say, then cast your line out again.[line break][line break]Well, there's always next year."; End the story finally saying "That could have gone worse!"; If hidden count is less than 4.9: Say "'The sacred herms have been desecrated, and you are the ones responsible! Oh, you'll be paying for this for a long time,' the magistrate snarls. But he's brought short by a polite cough from one of his men.[line break][line break]'Beggin['] yer pardon,' he says, 'but there was a lot of herms broke, over a dozen by my reckoning. This lot had most but not all.'[line break][line break]The magistrate revolves this in his noodle, and reaches a conclusion. 'So there were more accomplices, eh? You'll give them up or it will go all the worse for you,' he threatens. Puffy, Machon, and you gulp in a rapid triple rhythm that would make for a good song, if you ever feel like singing again which feels a remote chance at this juncture.[line break][line break]'Yes, we had accomplices,' shouts Alky, eyes flashing. 'Don't you recognize this man?', he says, indicating Puffy. 'He's the high priest of the Eleusinian Mysteries! Our accomplice was the Goddess herself!'[line break][line break]'Er, quite,' says Puffy, in a not-entirely-convincing fashion. 'I have had a revelation from the Goddess -- woe to Athens for we have been judged! She ordered me to withdraw the herms['] protection for we no longer merit it.' The magistrate looks nonplussed -- he's wavering but you're not sure he's quite bought the bill of sale, so Puffy throws in a supernumerary 'woe!' for effect.[line break][line break]'All right,' he snaps with a begrudging air. 'Maybe this is something you need to sort out with the other priests. But none of you lot better leave Athens until we get to the bottom of things.' With a closing harrumph, he leads his men out of your digs.[line break][line break]The four of you look at each other in silence until you're quite sure they're beyond earshot. 'Quick thinking, Puffy,' Alky allows. 'But I can't say I fancy our odds. Despite that closing admonition, I see a lot of reason to find more hospitable climes. I'd been planning a trip to Sicily -- you lot want to come with?'[line break][line break]"; Pause the game; Clear only the main screen; Say "Three months later, as you give yet another hard pull to your oar (turns out this Sicilian trip was more of a bally expedition and you're expected to sing for your supper, except instead of singing it's rowing a trireme), a thought occurs. You turn to your benchmate: 'Say, Puffy,' you ask, 'what, when you get right down to it, were those old mysteries about? They got a bit lost in the shuffle.'[line break][line break]Puffy heaves a sigh -- he's not the cheerfullest benchmate, it's more fun when you're paired up with Machon. 'They're a ritual re-enactment of Persephone's abduction and rescue, symbolizing the regeneration and ultimate ascent of the soul.'[line break][line break]'Oh,' you say.[line break][line break]'I mean it's not very good when you just say it like that,' Puffy admits.[line break][line break]'No, of course.'[line break][line break]'And Alky probably built it up for you, nothing can ever live up to high expectations.' You smile at him in commiseration. 'Plus the kykeon -- the kykeon really helps it all land.'[line break][line break]'Shame it didn't quite come together,' you say, then give the oar another pull.[line break][line break]Well, there's always next year."; End the story finally saying "At least there are no Great-Aunts around". [This is I'm pretty sure the most complex rule in the entire game -- it had at least one bug in it in the IF Comp release, with the Magistrate incorrectly reporting whether one unmentionable had been hidden, which made getting the "perfect" ending even harder than it was meant to be, but given how many moving pieces there are in the sequence I think that's not too bad! This is another one where breaking it down into something other than just giant say statements with multiple nested if conditions would have made writing and debugging much much easier -- I'm not sure how deep you need to read into the docs to learn about "to say" statements, but clearly I didn't make it that far!] Chapter 7 - Menus and Other Miscellany Understand the command "about" as something new. Understand "about" as aboutening. Aboutening is an action out of world applying to nothing. Carry out aboutening: Say "This is the post-Comp version of The Eleusinian Miseries, which was originally entered into the 26th IF Comp in October of 2020; this update, released in December 2020, incorporates a number of bug fixes and small puzzle tweaks, as well as a bunch of syntax and general ease-of-use updates. If you've already played the Comp release, there's nothing in here to merit a replay, though there is one set of new jokes that I think are rather funny. If you'd like to just check those out and quit, you can type RUIN THE NEW JOKES.[line break][line break]Conversation with other people is handled using ASK (someone) ABOUT (something) -- other phrasings may also work, but those are optional. At some points, you may wish to try giving other characters a command, using the syntax 'NAME, ACTION'. There are no sounds or images.[line break][line break]The Eleusinian Miseries is a merciful work, meaning it's impossible to die or get permanently stuck -- if that seems to have happened, please provide a bug report by emailing me at russo2116@gmail.com! There are three slightly different endings, so saving early in the time-sensitive finale sequence (you'll know it when you get there) may be advisable if you'd like to experiment with them. Or, since they're only slightly different, you may not.[line break][line break]The game includes comedically-described consumption of alcohol and a hallucinogen, discreetly-described but anatomically-correct statuary, and blasphemy against the Greek gods in both historically-accurate and entirely invented varieties.[line break][line break]You can see full credits by typing, predictably, CREDITS, and hints are available via the HELP command." Understand the command "credits" as something new. Understand "credits" as creditening. Creditening is an action out of world applying to nothing. Carry out Creditening: Say "The Eleusinian Miseries is a game by Mike Russo. If you have feedback, questions, or criticism, please email me at russo2116@gmail.com.[line break][line break]The game was written in Inform 7 by Graham Nelson, and uses Menus, Punctuation Removal, and Basic Screen Effects by Emily Short. This is the first game I've written, and I benefited immensely from the support of the kind souls at the IF Community Forum, especially Gavin Lambert, Matt Weiner, and Andrew Plotkin, who extricated me from a few messes of my own making.[line break][line break]I was very fortunate in my beta testers, who were thoughtful and rigorous in equal measure: Peter M.J. Gross, Alex Harby, Christopher Merriner, Caleb Wilson, and Brian Rushton. If at any point you are happy to find that a particular synonym is supported, or a gentle cue leads you to a puzzle's solution, you probably have them to thank; when you find yourself frustrated at the lack of same, you definitely have me to blame.[line break][line break]I obviously owe a debt to P.G. Wodehouse, in much the same way that Lord Elgin owed a debt to the builders of the Acropolis -- the voice, tone, and several of the story's predicaments were heavily inspired by his novels and short stories. My take on Alky, the titular Mysteries, and the major incident in the last portion of the game (you'll know it when you get there) were also inspired by Larry Gonick's Cartoon History of the Universe, which helped me bluff my way through more high school history classes than I care to count.[line break][line break]My wife made all of this possible, by getting me into Wodehouse but also providing ideas and inspiration, as well as initial testing and feedback that helped keep me on the right track. Plus she did the cover. So this one's for and/or on her." Understand "ruin the new jokes/joke" as a mistake ("You can RECITE POETRY now, with four different potential gags, two of which aren't bad, and zero of which have any usefulness if you try to entertain the crowd with poetry during the initiation."). Understand "Walkthrough" as a mistake ("You can find a walkthrough on the IFDB page, but if you're stuck, it may be more rewarding to type HELP for some hints."). Understand "Walkthru" as a mistake ("You can find a walkthrough on the IFDB page, but if you're stuck, it may be more rewarding to type HELP for some hints."). Understand "help" as helpening. Understand "hint" as helpening. Understand "hints" as helpening. Helpening is an action out of world applying to nothing. Carry out helpening: Now the current menu is the Table of First Hints; If the player has been in the peristyle at least once: Now the current menu is the Table of Second Hints; If Departing has happened: Now the current menu is the Table of Third Hints; If Finale has happened: Now the current menu is the Table of Fourth Hints; Carry out the displaying activity; Clear the screen; Try looking. [One of the very last things I did was figure out the hint feature, which I once again ripped off from an example in the recipe book I think? At any rate that's why these are the only tables in the whole game; I didn't really know how they worked, and was just engaged in cargo-cult-style imitation] Table of First Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "General Tips (Spoiler-Free)" Table of Tips "" Hint toggle rule "The Undercroft" Table of Undercroft Hints Table of Second Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "General Tips" Table of Tips "" Hint toggle rule "The Undercroft" Table of Undercroft Hints "The Initiation" Table of Initiation Hints Table of Third Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "General Tips" Table of Tips "" Hint toggle rule "The Undercroft" Table of Undercroft Hints "The Initiation" Table of Initiation Hints "Departing Eleusis" Table of Departing Hints Table of Fourth Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "General Tips" Table of Tips "" Hint toggle rule "The Undercroft" Table of Undercroft Hints "The Initiation" Table of Initiation Hints "Departing Eleusis" Table of Departing Hints "Finale" Table of Finale Hints [There are of course more elegant ways to add a new entry to a table than manually recreate it each time, but by now you know how I roll] Table of Tips Hint Used "Before getting into specific hints, here are some general tips that might be useful." 1 "If you're stuck on something, try asking any characters you find about the predicament." "In an inversion of the well-known and frequently-misattributed aphorism, trying the same thing multiple times sometimes provides a gentle nudge in the right direction." "Many puzzles have multiple solutions, so don't get too hung up if a particular item or action doesn't seem to accomplish very much (conversely, there should be few, if any, pure red herrings in the game)." "Don't be afraid to try something that seems like it shouldn't work -- it might, or even if it doesn't the results might be entertaining!" Table of Undercroft Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "Goal for this Section" Table of Undercroft Goals "" Hint toggle rule "Getting the Krater" Table of Krater Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Getting the Amphora" Table of Amphora Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Getting the Knife" Table of Knife Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Getting the Barley" Table of Barley Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Getting the Pennyroyal" Table of Pennyroyal Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Ending the Section" Table of Ending Undercroft Hints "" Hint toggle rule Table of Undercroft Goals Hint Used "You've been deputized to collect some materials for the evening's initiation ceremony, so this bit is more or less a scavenger hunt." 1 "Scavenger hunts need lists -- fortunately, you're already carrying one." "Read the list and hunt down each of the items." "Alky will let you up to the initiation proper once after you have everything in your inventory -- and if you're missing any, he might give you a bit of a hint." Table of Krater Hints Hint Used "Step one is finding the krater, which shouldn't be too difficult." 1 "Examining the large pile of kraters in the store room will identify the particular one you're after." "Seems like taking the thing is going to be the challenge, due to a lack of good footing." "Picking up a single krater while you're standing on a whole pile of them isn't going to work." "Is there a way to pick up the Krater while standing elsewhere in the room?" "If the previous hint didn't make anything click, you might want to work on some of the other puzzles for a bit, then come back to this one." "You can't pick up the krater until after you've gotten the amphora out of the granary." "That bit of rope that had been holding the amphora might still have some use in it." "The explicit solution is coming up next." "X KRATERS. TIE ROPE TO KRATER. PULL ROPE." Table of Amphora Hints Hint Used "You need an amphora full of water. At least finding the amphora should be fairly easy!" 1 "That rope seems to be rather the impediment." "If you can't get that stubborn rope out of the way yet, perhaps you should come back to this puzzle after working on some other pieces of the list?" "You need the knife before you can cut the amphora free." "All right, now you've got an amphora, but you still need water. Seen any around?" "If not, you might need to work on one of the other puzzles and explore more of the undercroft." "If you've been to the garden, you might have noticed some there." "The muddy water doesn't meet the need, but it must have started out clean." "It seems like there's a source of clean water above the garden." "Climbing up the waterfall in the garden doesn't work, but is there anyplace else in the undercroft where you might be able to gain some height?" "The ceiling seems awfully high in the store room..." "Rats, it's rather dark up here! Hopefully you still have the torch." "The explicit solution is coming up next." "CUT ROPE WITH KNIFE. TAKE AMPHORA. E. S. U. SE. FILL AMPHORA WITH WATER." Table of Knife Hints Hint Used "This might be closer to hand than you think." 1 "Besides your to-do list and your clothing, do you happen to be lugging anything else around?" "You're not exactly the type to neglect your physical comfort." "Once you've discovered the source of the itch, might as well give it a closer look." "The explicit solution is coming up next." "SCRATCH ITCH. X OBJECT." Table of Barley Hints Hint Used "Finding barley shouldn't be the problem -- finding unspoiled barley, there's the rub." 1 "Is there any place in the granary where some of the grain might have been at least somewhat better preserved?" "You need to be able to take the amphora before you can get the barley out of it." "Actually, it's fairly difficult to extract the barley even once you have the amphora, and Alky needs you to be carrying it directly rather than just leaving this problem for someone else to sort out." "If this still isn't working out, it might be better to switch to one of the other items on the list for a while and come back to it." "Once you get the amphora sorted, this should be easy." "The explicit solution is coming up next." "Once you have the amphora filled with water, all you need to do is TAKE BARLEY." Table of Pennyroyal Hints Hint Used "Step one to getting the pennyroyal is finding where some herbs might be likely to grow." 1 "If you haven't found such a place, it might be because the dimness of the undercroft is inhibiting your exploration." "If only you had a torch!" "Wait, Alky has a torch." "He's a nice fellow, you can just ask for his." "All right, now the problem is there are too many herbs, not too few." "How can you pick out the one you need?" "The list gives you the info you're looking for." "Trying to pick out the exact right shade of lavender doesn't seem like it's working very well." "Is there any other sense you can bring to bear?" "The explicit solution is coming up next." "ASK ALKY ABOUT TORCH. E. E. E. E. S. SMELL HERBS. TAKE PENNYROYAL." Table of Ending Undercroft Hints hint Used "Once you've gathered everything, you can just go up from the cellar. If you're missing something, Alky will give you a hint." 1 Table of Initiation Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "Goal for this Section" Table of Initiation Goals "" Hint toggle rule "First Step, or, Blooey and Everything After" Table of Blooey Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Second Step, or, Silence is Golden" Table of Silence Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Third Step, or, Putting on a Show" Table of Comedy Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Fourth Step, or, A Spot of Prayer" Table of Praying Hints "" Hint toggle rule Table of Initiation Goals Hint Used "Puffy will lead you through the initiation, step by step, and will make it clear when you're ready to move on to the next phase." 1 "He won't start the initiation until you're ready, though, which you can signal by ASK PUFFY ABOUT INITIATION." "You can also resume the initiation by answering 'yes' when moving into the telesterion." Table of Blooey Hints Hint Used "Well, in theory this should be simple." 1 "Hopefully you're not having problems at the 'blooey' part." "The bit about Mighty Potnia is trickier -- the pronunciation seems awfully hard to get right." "Under ordinary circumstances, your lungs, throat, and diaphragm don't seem to be up to the task." "You might need to obtain some kind of substance that could enhance your performance (no, not like that)." "How might you render your statements more plosive and/or nasal?" "Perhaps you could look around the rest of the sanctuary while you have a think?" "There are a lot of good things to eat and drink in the banquet hall -- might any of those help?" "Or if not any of the food or libations, at least a condiment?" "Too much pepper can make you sneezy." "But it's all in the timing!" "The explicit solution is coming up next." "From the banquet hall: SMELL PEPPER. N. E. (YES/ASK PUFFY ABOUT INITIATION). Z. BLOOEY. Z (wait a second time if you answered 'yes' when walking in). POTNIA." Table of Silence Hints Hint Used "Well, this one should be easy so long as you stay still." 1 "Or at least it would have been easy if it'd come first, before you started sneezing." "Know any good ways to stop sneezing?" "Maybe one of the fellows has some ideas?" "All right, that wasn't very helpful." "If all this started because you got too much pepper in your face, maybe that's where the solution lies, too." "Yes, clearing out the old nasal and/or facial area might do the trick." "If you decided to do this via wine and not water, you might have just created another problem just as you were solving the first one. Fortunately it's not too hard to sober up!" "The explicit solution is coming up next." "From the peristyle: WASH FACE IN FOUNTAIN. E. YES. Z. Z. Z. Z." "You can also drink water, either from the fountain or first filling the cup. Drinking wine will cure sneezing but give you hiccups, which you can also cure by drinking water or washing your face." Table of Comedy Hints Hint Used "This one also doesn't seem like it'd be too hard!" 1 "Let's get your routine down first of all -- what kind of act do you want to be?" "Singing, dancing, or joking all seem like they'd fit the bill." "The audience gets jaded pretty soon, so you might need to change things up mid-way through." "Even going all out, you're still not getting enough laughs just based on what you're doing." "Maybe there's some way you can be funny beyond how you're acting?" "A visual component often makes comedy even more hilarious." "Getting in the appropriate costume will make you look ridiculous." "You're going for the silliest accessories you can find." "The explicit solution is coming next." "From the closet: WEAR TAM. WEAR BOA. WEAR SANDALS. S. E. YES. JOKE. G. G. SING." "For bonus silliness, the chunk of amphora can also substitute as a hat, and the crowd will enjoy a well-timed sneeze (they're not especially highbrow)." Table of Praying Hints Hint Used "This comes down to a test of endurance." 1 "What are the best ways to keep awake when you're sleepy?" "You could ask for help, try to wake yourself up, or physically prevent your eyes from closing." "That's you sorted, but poor Machon is also feeling none too alert." "What worked for you will (mostly) work for him." "The explicit solution is coming next." "From the peristyle: WASH FACE IN FOUNTAIN. S. ASK ALKY ABOUT MACHON. N. E. PRAY." "You can also give Machon some water if you carry it in a cup, or attempt to prop your droopy eye open with a toothpick (seems awfully risky, though)." Table of Departing Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "Goal for this Section" Table of Departing Goals "" Hint toggle rule "Sorting Out Puffy" Table of Puffy Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Sorting Out Hippy" Table of Hippy Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Sorting Out the Chariot" Table of Chariot Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Getting to Athens" Table of Athens Hints "" Hint toggle rule "Sorting Out the Herms" Table of Herm Hints "" Hint toggle rule Table of Departing Goals Hint Used "The initiation has gone about as far as it will go tonight, so now it's time to head to Athens." 1 "As Alky says, you need both to get your transportation sorted, and bring Puffy back to what passes for his senses." "Then once you wrap those up, there'll be a few vicissitudes to endure on the way to Athens." Table of Puffy Hints Hint Used "At least finding him won't be too challenging." 1 "Either you need to come to him, or you need to get him to come to you." "Assuming the first option is a little easier, is there a way up to the roof?" "That tree by the side of the sanctuary might do the business, but the bees seem to like their personal space." "Apiculture might run in your family, but it seems like you missed out on the lessons." "Maybe someone else knows some things about bees?" "Someone with whom you've got family in common?" "So long as you've got the right tool to hand, this should be straightforward." "If you left your torch behind in the undercroft for some reason, you might be able to find a replacement somewhere." "Specifically, in the post-chaos telesterion." "The explicit solution is coming next." "From the side of the temple: SMOKE HIVE WITH TORCH. UP." "Puffy will also come down if you inflict your musical stylings on him, so long as you've got some kind of accompaniment." Table of Hippy Hints Hint Used "This horse is nervous, and there's no silver bullet to getting her calm." 1 "If you don't have any ideas, maybe her owner can help?" "Getting rid of the pig seems a good place to start -- of course, you wouldn't want to hurt the blighter." "He seems quite focused on his feeding." "Maybe he'll follow his nose, if there's something tempting him away from the yard?" "Specifically, someplace he'd want to stay?" "Hippy, like any creature, likes attention, both physical and aural." "Her blinders seem to have gone missing, but maybe you can find a workaround?" "Might be worth a rummage through the closet once again." "Specifically, the hat rack." "The explicit solution is coming next." "From banquet hall: TAKE FOOD. N. N. TAKE WARMERS. S. W. W. PUT WARMERS ON HIPPY. SHOW FOOD TO PIG. E. E. S. N. W. W. WHISPER TO HIPPY." "If you were some kind of monster, you could also give Hippy some wine, and scare or shoo away the pig." "Hippy also enjoys being petted, and if you fixed the chariot first, you might have found a horsey treat Hippy would enjoy." "Throwing the food over the wall in the yard also works, as does subbing in the lump of honey cake for the food." Table of Chariot Hints Hint Used "At the diagnostic level, the chariot seems to be having two independent issues." 1 "The reins need to be completely replaced." "Are there any rein-like objects that could be dragooned into service?" "There are several possibilities, but only two will work -- which is good, since you need two!" "The wheel seems a harder nut to crack." "First you'll need something to replace the missing wood." "Fortunately, wood does grow on trees, and there are a few around." "You can't go driving about on a branch straight from the tree, though." "And it's hard to make repairs to the wheel while it's still attached to the chariot." "Fixing the wheel wouldn't be so hard if you could keep holding everything together -- the trick is getting it to stay in place once you've let go." "As to affixing one thing to another, your choices are generally tying, nailing, and gluing." "Tying seems to be out -- makes for a lumpy wheel, and besides, you need the rope for the reins." "Nailing likewise as you seem to be missing a hammer." "Do you have anything that might make the wheel stick?" "Something that a less creative carpenter might not consider?" "The explicit solution is coming next." "From the workshop: TIE BOA TO RING. TIE ROPE TO RING. TAKE WHEEL. PUT WHEEL ON TABLE. N. E. N. TAKE BRANCH. S. E. S. TAKE CAKE. N. W. W. S. TRIM BRANCH WITH SAW. PUT HONEY ON WHEEL. PUT BRANCH ON WHEEL. PUT WHEEL ON CHARIOT." "The honeycomb you get from Puffy's clothing once he's down from the roof will also work as a sticking agent." Table of Athens Hints Hint Used "Things are going from bad to worse, but Alky seems to have things in hand." 1 "Following along with instructions or your instincts should see you through." "Alternately if you're feeling lazy you could just see how things play out." "The explicit solution is coming next." "WAKE PUFFY. STEER LEFT. WARN MACHON. TELL PUFFY ABOUT HERMS." Table of Herm Hints Hint Used "These things are very sacred, but they're shattering left and right." 1 "It seems quite bad!" "There doesn't seem to be an easy fix here." "As long as no one finds out what happened, maybe everything will be all right?" Table of Finale Hints Title Subtable Description Toggle "Goal for this Section" Table of Finale Goals "" Hint toggle rule "The Bedroom" Table of Bedroom Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Fireplace" Table of Fireplace Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Writing Desk" Table of Desk Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Bed" Table of Bed Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Chest" Table of Chest Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Shelf" Table of Shelf Hints "" Hint toggle rule "The Endings" Table of Ending Hints "" Hint toggle rule Table of Finale Goals Hint Used "Oh no." 1 "Oh no oh no oh no." "The magistrate is banging down your door, and you've got evidence of your misdeeds all over the place." "High-tailing it out of there is a nice idea, but not especially viable." "A cover-up seems unlikely to be completely effective, but is probably your best option. What's the worst that can happen?" "See how many places you can stash unmentionables before time runs out. Looking around and taking inventory don't advance time, which makes things a bit easier (examining things does, which makes things a bit harder)." "Making things a bit harder, you can't get more than one unmentionable into any given spot." "Before getting into details, there's also one key way that you can alter an unmentionable, which will make some hiding places more viable and others less so." "If getting all the unmentionables hidden seems too challenging, that's all right -- you might have more ideas after seeing your ending." "If you've done all you can think of and you want to speed things up, you can type OPEN DOOR. YES." Table of Bedroom Hints Hint Used "Taking stock of the room, beyond the pieces of furniture that all have their own hint topics, you're looking at the window, the door, and your friends." 1 "Starting with the last first, maybe you could enlist the fellows['] help in concealing some unmentionables?" "Not everyone may be up to the challenge, though." "Moving on, the door is closed so you can't exactly hide anything behind it." "But once it's opened, you could hide something behind where it will be." "It doesn't seem like there's anybody in the alley right now." "Though any disturbances could draw a crowd." "The explicit solution is coming next." "GIVE UNMENTIONABLE TO ALKY. HIDE UNMENTIONABLE BEHIND DOOR. THROW UNMENTIONABLE OUT WINDOW." Table of Fireplace Hints Hint Used "The fireplace seems like a likely spot to conceal something." 1 "The wood's rather dark and charred, though, so an unmentionable will stick out like a sore thumb." "There are two ways to make the unmentionable darker." "The more obvious way would be to get the fire going so ash and smoke get everywhere." "If you still have your torch, that should be easy." "If not, the flint should get you where you're going...." "Though you'll still need some steel." "Hopefully you didn't lose track of your trusty knife." "Make sure to set things up before lighting the fire, or it might be too hot to do what you have in mind." "The explicit solution is coming next." "PUT UNMENTIONABLE IN WOOD. GET FLINT. ASK PUFFY FOR KNIFE. LIGHT FIRE." "If you've figured out another way to darken an unmentionable, you don't need to faff about lighting the fire." Table of Desk Hints Hint Used "There's a lot going on here!" 1 "Let's start with the pan pipes." "A series of tubes, each bigger than the last, offers some opportunities to hide in plain sight." "You probably don't want to leave them somewhere they will draw attention to themselves, though." "Now how about your writing things." "An unmentionable wouldn't make a very good pen as-is, but you might be able to dress it up a bit." "Of course, no one writes with two pens at once." "And most people don't get a pen ready unless they want to do something with it." "The explicit solution comes next." "TIE UNMENTIONABLE TO PIPES. PUT UNMENTIONABLE IN INKWELL. WRITE ON PAPER WITH INKED UNMENTIONABLE. TAKE STYLUS. PUT INKED UNMENTIONABLE ON DESK." "You can try to hide an inked unmentionable in other places as well, though it's (usually) a bad idea." "If you're curious what you wound up writing on the paper, just wait until the magistrate finds it." "If the pipes aren't left on the desk or on the shelf, the magistrate will give them a closer inspection and find the unmentionable." Table of Bed Hints Hint Used "There's something to find as well as something to hide here." 1 "Why is your mattress feeling lumpy? You pay for only the best." "Once you get that figured out, you'll have found a nice hiding place -- though it might be a bit strange if the magistrate saw you carrying it." "But your original idea should still work too." "The explicit solution is coming next." "LOOK IN MATTRESS. TAKE HORSE. PUT UNMENTIONABLE IN HORSE. PUT HORSE ON SHELF. PUT UNMENTIONABLE IN MATTRESS." Table of Chest Hints Hint Used "This seems like an obvious hiding place." 1 "...maybe too obvious." "Plus there's the small matter of the umentionables already stashed here." "Maybe there's a way to be a little more stealthy here." "Better not to draw any additional attention to the chest once you've finished." "The explicit solution is coming next." "OPEN CHEST. TAKE ALL UNMENTIONABLES FROM CHEST. HIDE UNMENTIONABLE UNDER CHITONS. CLOSE CHEST" Table of Shelf Hints Hint Used "This seems quite the boring shelf." 1 "And it is!" "If there's an object that might draw too much attention if not tucked away, though, this might be a good place for it." "The explicit solution is coming next." "If you've managed to hide an unmentionable in the Trojan Horse replica or the pan pipes, you can PUT them ON SHELF where they won't draw any notice." "You can also put them on the desk, if you prefer that decorative scheme." Table of Ending Hints Hint Used "There are three possible endings." 1 "Which one you get is based on how many unmentionables you manage to hide from the magistrate." "They're not especially different, though, so if it seems like too much work to look for ones other than the one you got, you won't be missing much." "You might get ideas on how to do a better job once you see how the magistrate and his men search your room." "Or just follow all the other hints." "You get the first ending if you hide four or fewer unmentionables, the second one if you hide between five and eight, and the last ending if you hide all nine." When play begins: Now the final question wording in row 3 of the Table of Final Question Options is "see suggestions for AMUSING things to do as well as some end notes". Rule for amusing a victorious player: now the current menu is the Table of Amusing Matter; now the current menu title is "Potential Post-Completion Diversions"; carry out the displaying activity; clear the screen. Table of Amusing Matter Title Subtable Description Toggle "Post-Game Notes" -- "I hope you enjoyed The Eleusinian Miseries! If you did, didn't, or have any other feedback, please send it to me at russo2116@gmail.com or post it on the IF Community Forum. This is my first game, so criticism would be very helpful![line break][line break]A quick note on the historicity, or lack thereof, of the game -- the desecration of the herms was a real event that occurred in Athens in the middle of the Peloponnesian War, documented by Thucydides in his history of the same. The culprit was never found, though Alcibiades, who was viewed as something of an enfant terrible, was blamed, and in fact had to cut short his military expedition to Sicily when he was recalled to stand trial for the crime (seeing which way the wind was blowing, he promptly defected to Sparta -- quite the flexible fellow, he later made a further defection to Persia, then un-defected back to Athens).[line break][line break]I tried to avoid anachronisms that would be detectable with 10 seconds of looking at Wikipedia except when I couldn't give up the gag. I'm sure there are some players whose expertise on the period goes much deeper than mine, however, so I would appreciate hearing about any howlers so I can correct them for a post-comp release (I am aware that the opening proem-y bit is a) not remotely close in meter to the dactylic hexameter of the sources it's aping, b) riffing off of epic poems that are not remotely close in time or content to the period I'm loosely depicting here, and c) not as funny as I think it is, but I like the topless towers tumpety-tum gag and so this darling has remained un-killed).[line break][line break]Finally, I wanted to name a significant flaw in the game, which is how poorly it does on representation -- all the major characters are European men, with only a few, largely-derisive references to a Great-Aunt and some incidental female-coded names in the crowd scenes to break up the monotony. This is partially a failure of imagination and inability to look past my inspirations, in this case the Wodehouse side of things -- the whole milieu, and many of the jokes, are predicated on the existence of an elite but useless social class (I mean, a major meta joke is that all of this tomfoolery is happening in the middle of a civilization-ending war, and the characters barely notice!). Therefore I felt like including a woman or someone from Asia Minor as one of the main cast would have put them in something of an unfair position and I wasn't sure how to address that without taking the story fairly off course. So for lack of a better idea, I stuck with this approach, though it's probably the aspect of the game with which I'm least content (coming in second is the absolutely atrocious way conversations are coded -- I am no programmer and the source code will prove it)." -- "Easily-Overlooked Amusing Things" Table of Amusements "" Hint toggle rule Table of Amusements Hint Used "The gag density in the game is fairly high, but here are some that might have flown under the radar. Have you tried...." 1 "X ME twice in succession?" "Wearing a second belt, or hat, or pair of shoes, while you're already wearing a first?" "Running through all the different permutations for JOKE and SING, or DANCEing while wearing different shoes?" "EMPTYing an already-empty container?" "Xing Alky's chiton?" "ASKing Alky about his flask so you can have a sip?" "Xing all the food in the store room?" "BURNing the rope instead of cutting it to get the amphora?" "Xing and EATing all the food in the banquet hall, including EATing the olives twice?" "WEARing the frayed rope or the largish chunk of amphora?" "WEARing and REMOVEing all the hats, shoes, and belts in the closet?" "GIVEing the cup to the different characters and animals, when filled with wine or water?" "Running through all the different descriptions of your sneezes? The one involving Ares is a personal favorite." "DRINKing the cup when it's empty?" "Trying out different ways of curing hiccups?" "Xing or TAKEing the platter and basin in the telesterion, before they're whisked away to make the kykeon?" "Performing the prayer vigil while hiccuping and/or sneezing?" "PUTing the toothpick in your eye? In Machon's eye?" "Xing or DRINKing the spilled, spoiled kykeon?" "THROWing something at Puffy while he's on the roof?" "SMELLing or EATing the honeycomb?" "Xing Puffy once he's off the roof?" "EATing or SMELLing the horsey treat, or GIVEing it to someone?" "RIDEing Hippy? The pig? One of your friends?" "PETting Hippy? The pig? One of your friends?" "BURNing the springy green branch?" "Doing anything to the general aura of hard, earnest toil in the workshop?" "Using the gold chain as a makeshift rein?" "LISTENing while in the side of the temple?" "WAITing to see all the different potential events while driving on the Sacred Way?" "Trying out which hiding places aren't as effective if you use them to conceal an inked unmentionable?" "GIVEing unmentionables to Puffy and Machon to hide?" "Carrying an inked unmentionable when the magistrate comes in?" "Carrying the pan pipes, with a tied-on unmentionable, when the magistrate comes in?" "Leaving the Trojan Horse somewhere obvious after you've hidden an unmentionable in it." "Leaving an uninked unmentionable on the writing desk when the magistrate comes in." "ASKing Alky about various historical topics -- the great philosophers, the Spartans, Thucydides and the Peloponnesian War, or even his real name?" Chapter 8 - Easter Eggs Instead of asking Alky about "Alcibiades", say "'I'm trying to have an informal night,' Alky sniffs in disapproval." Instead of asking Alky about "Thucydides", say "'I heard he's turned to scribbling since he was exiled for his failures of generalship,' Alky says with a nervous laugh. 'Athenians can be fickle.'" Instead of asking someone about "the/-- peloponnesian/-- war", say "You don't want to ruin the evening by bringing that up -- it's rather dreary stuff." Instead of asking Alky about "Aristotle", say "'Not born yet, I'm afraid,' Alky says." Instead of asking Alky about "Plato", say "'Currently he's about twelve, so not much of interest to say about the chap,' Alky replies." Instead of asking Alky about "Socrates", say "Alky gets teary-eyed. 'My great teacher -- and he saved my life at Potidaea!' he cries. 'I mean, if you believe Plato, who wasn't alive at the time and is hardly an unbiased source,' he adds under his breath." Instead of asking Alky about "the/-- spartans/sparta", say "Alky gives a smile. 'I've won some victories against them, but I doubt they'd hold a grudge in the unlikely event that I ever defect!' You smile as well -- yes, that would be very unlikely." Instead of asking Alky about "Sicily/Sicilian expedition/--", say "'I've heard it's lovely this time of year,' Alky says. 'And quite strategically important!'" Instead of asking Alky about "Athens/Athenians", say "'The greatest city in the world,' Alky says, without any cynicism as far as you can see. 'And such loyal, reasonable people!'" Chapter 9 - Not for Release Understand "* [text]" as commenting. Commenting is an action applying to one topic. Before jumping when the player is in the bedroom, say "[hidden count]." Carry out commenting: Say "Noted, thank you!" [And we end much as we began -- interpolating a standalone testing rule in between the definition and implementation pieces of an action, because that's smart!] [I hope you've enjoyed this cook's tour of TEM's source code. As awful as it is, the game itself came sixth in a field of I think 103 in the 2020 IF Comp, which is proof positive that miracles can happen if you follow your dreams, and also that great beta testers can help compensate for atrocious coding skill even though they shouldn't have to. Thanks for reading!]